How do you know?

[Naomianne 0]

How do you know that you are looking good, after some weight loss, even large amounts? I can only tell just how I look by photos. The various ways for me are mirror, weight, clothes, measurement and photos. I can see a lot of people are a bit on the big side when I go through my normal day, which is fine, and they look attractive to me, yet if I look at myself, being just the same sort of size, with various bulges I can't stand it. Maybe I am being too tough on myself? :w00t:

[Astrasmom 1]

How do you know that you are looking good, after some weight loss, even large amounts? I can only tell just how I look by photos. The various ways for me are mirror, weight, clothes, measurement and photos. I can see a lot of people are a bit on the big side when I go through my normal day, which is fine, and they look attractive to me, yet if I look at myself, being just the same sort of size, with various bulges I can't stand it. Maybe I am being too tough on myself? :biggrin:

We are always more critical of ourselves and it really never hits us that we have lost weight until you have lost a big amount. Especially the heavier we are and the more weight that we have to lose. And no matter how thin you may get you will always find a certain bulge that you don't like, or a certain part of you that you might not like. But someday you will accept yourself and those bulges won't be so critical to you any longer. People tell me all of the time that I'm looking great and I have really lost some weight. I on the other hand honestly can't see much except in my face.

Enjoy the way that you feel. Instead of looking at yourself in a negative way. Go out and do something for yourself to reward yourself for what you have already accomplished. Get your hair done, your makeup, a facial, a massage or even a manicure. Make yourself feel good.

Remember you can't judge a book by it's cover. Beauty lies from within. :wink2:

[btrieger 21]

I always look good!

[grizzlyrider 0]

Yes, I have the problem that I don't really believe I look any different. I know my clothes feel loose but the nasty little voice in my head tells me they just are old and stretched. Logically I know this cannot be true but my head is just not there yet. My voice also tells me that it's not real and every morning I have to jump up out of bed and go to the scale (after the bathroom!). I'm sure this will all work out eventually but it's obviously a problem for me.:wink2:

[Jachut 487]

Oh, we're definitely tough on ourselves. I think if I could really see how small I am - at five foot 10, I'm an 8 in American sizes, I'd be thrilled. Instead I think I cant wear this or that becuase my muffin top is showing.

On other women, I find tiny little love handles, or a little bit of a roll on the lower tummy not at all unattractive - it's real! It makes them look like normal but attractive women. But I cant tolerate it on myself.

Women far bigger than me go around in tight clothes and I am completely pedantic about never showing bra straps, vpl etc. I always always always check my outfits for bulges, visible underwear etc. Cant stand VPL!!

[Naomianne 0]

I have to get back into my skinny size 14 (12 US) jeans..inside I feel no different, but worry about what other people are thinking about how I look, esp. as I see it's totally shallow thinking on my part. I want to look good this Christmas, and January school holidays. Even at the beach I wont swim without a tee shirt and board shorts. I don't want to look 40, but as gorgeous as the teeny boppers running about in their bikinis! One can dream. If big gals have no problems with how they look like in a tee shirts showing bra straps, a few rolls, without worrying, I say "good for you". Personally I hate my bat wings, and gone wrong Tummy Tuck scar. Is this the price I need to feel accepted by others...do you think this could be why?

[Blaze21 5]

I'm in the same place mentally. I have lost 96 lbs and weigh 161 lbs. People tell me I look like I weigh 130 lbs. They are completely shocked when I tell them that I am still overweight for my height of 5-5. I do carry my weight well(whatever that means), but I still see myself in the mirror as that 257 lb woman I used to be. I don't feel any difference really and when I look in the mirror, it's even worse. I continue to pick myself apart. I have always seen myself as a weight, instead of a person who weighs xyz. I have about 26 more lbs that I would like to lose, but for me it might as well be the 96 lbs that I have already lost(if that makes sense). I hope eventually I can get past this because it's really no good to think and be this way. Thanks for letting me vent. :wink2:

[Naomianne 0]

Yes. I've regained roughly 20 lbs after stopping smoking last March. now back to 183. Before hand I got down to165 lbs with a BMI of 27. Family members would say that I'm "too slim, getting too thin", although I said that I'm still in the 'overweight range', yet they were the first to notice that I did gain weight..."what's wrong with your band? Isn't it not working properly"... Can't win I'm afraid.

[Astrasmom 1]

I always look good!

Great Attitude. Whoo hoo. Good for you. We should all think positive like this.

[samanthazzz 0]

Most times I don't. I am still shocked when people comment on how much wt I lost.

The only thing that has somewhat put it in perspective is the smaller clothes.

I should be shouting from the rooftops, but I have that nagging voice in the back of my head saying "you'll gain it back" or even worse "you don't really look that good, you were just so darn fat to begin with"

[btrieger 21]

Great Attitude. Whoo hoo. Good for you. We should all think positive like this.

I said it tongue in cheek but honestly, I don't think I look bad even at 200 pounds overweight.

I think it is a male/female thing. Everyone else responding seems to be female and worries about how they look.

I guess men worry about other things.

[OverBeingFat 0]

My brain hasn't caught up either. I have people telling me I look fine now and don't need to lose anymore. When I tell them I want to take another 30 off, I get told I'll look like I'm sick or anorexic if I do. I still find myself going for the 2X & XL clothes first. It's only when I try them on and am swimming in them, I'll go grab a large (or lately mediums).

I also don't see it in the mirror at all. I have to look at pictures of me from before and compare to now to see a difference.

I think for me I've been so focused on being a fatty for so long, it's just going to take a while for my brain to reprogram itself.

[Naomianne 0]

Yep. Photos are the brutal truth. When I see my reflection in the mirror, particularly on the way out the door I think "Ahhhhhhhhhhh. GOM I look Fat! So then it's a frantic lot of thinking of judging by my size clothing I'm wearing, changing my clothes, the measurement tape measurements, or the scales for inner support.

Weight loss surgery is on my Top List of great things in my life, up there with marriage, motherhood, doing things I couldn't before. I actually spent most of my time at home feeling sorry for myself, eating myself in a way where I couldn't stop. I've always been a slow learner. :-)

[aubrie 6]

It's hard to be objective about yourself. What I see in the mirror is just not that different, but of course we see ourselves every day. In an effort to see how others see me, I ask my husband occasionally...."Is that woman bigger or smaller than me, and where?" He's been a good sport about this, and I know he doesn't lie to me. It's been a real eye opener. I definitely didn't see myself the same way. women he said were shaped just like me, actually looked pretty good. So why do I not see it in the mirror on myself?

[Naomianne 0]

Hi Aubrie. I notice that we have similar stats. Yes my hubby is honest, but kind with it. I guess he doesn't want to upset me, cause I look at some of those "before" pics of me, and I look vile! Going out to dinner made no waves, but still I would often spend hours trying something half way decent to wear. I've gained some weight after stopping smoking. I was comfy in my jeans, and now I'm refusing to get rid of them, so I guess it's a motivation (of sorts) to continue with the weight loss journey.