i feel like i'm being punished for losing weight...

[JUKU 1]

I am so glad I work with all men. Women are so vindictive & catty. Men just let everything roll off their back. I truely don't think I could go back to working with an office full of women.

[xpress1026 0]

i know your pain, i feel that i am being harrassed. my situation is a total 360 from yours. I was being told that i was dressing inapropriately for work now that i am overweight. i work for a healthcare comp. as soon as one of the MD's found out that i had been approved for lap band she literally pulled me off to side and told me she had denied my surgery because she thought that i was not appropriate. Suddendly, the same MD that has been complaining about my work attire and my weight (by the way she has told me that i am fat and need to loose the weight to my face) now tells me that i dont need the surgery and that i always dress appropriately and don't have any weight issues. i have thought about filing a complaint. I still have not decided.

[minimeme 1]

I know this is late but wanted a chance to add a different perspective. You seem to think the change in interpretation of policy is based on you, but there is a chance that it is based on someone else.

We have uniforms at work. I was wearing some self bought womens pants (rather than the company issued male uniform pants). I have worn them for years. Suddenly I was being told I had to wear the company issued stuff. It didnt have anything to do with me or my bosses perception of me. It had to do with someone else who WAS dressing innapropriately getting counseled on their dress. That person felt singled out and it made them force everyone to follow the letter of the law (so to speak) on their uniform policy.

So, dont take it so personally. There is always the chance you are being drug into someone elses battle. Ask for the written policy and just follow it. Best way to keep yourself out of trouble and out of the limelight.

[ElfiePoo 109]

as soon as one of the MD's found out that i had been approved for LAP-BAND® she literally pulled me off to side and told me she had denied my surgery because she thought that i was not appropriate..

I'd file a complaint because it's actually none of her business. It is not up to the surgeon to decide whether or not this surgery is appropriate for you...despite what some with god-complexes believe. If she's not even the surgeon, then it's none of her business at all.

It is up to you.

.

[greytz 4]

Even though your boss has a great figure and is athletic believe me when I say, she probably looks at you as competition now. My neighbor across the street and I were always close. She is gorgeous and 10 years younger than me and has a body to die for. Now that I have lost a little weight, her husband started making some flattering comments. I think just to make me feel good nothing harmful in that. He doesn't have a thing for me just to be nice. Anyway, she didn't like it at all. So, I think your boss is probably jealous in her own sort of way and she is going to have to deal with it. But also, I do believe there are two dress codes. When I was working and over the years, I went from thin to fat. My dress changed signficantly. People just accepted what I wore because I really couldn't find a decent suit unless I had it made and I couldn't afford that. Congrats on your success and I agree with the poster that said ask for another copy of the dress code and just be sure you are dressing accordingly and you have nothing to worry about.

[ElfiePoo 109]

I don't think it has anything to do with someone being jealous of your looks. I think it has more to do with the fact that fat people tend to be invisible. Even though at 260 pounds I was still fat, when I went from 330 to 260, I suddenly became 'visible' to those around me. People started commenting on how nice I looked or commenting on my outfits.

Despite the fact that the way I dressed had not changed. In fact, many of the clothes were the same. I just had them taken in.

The best thing you can do is arm yourself with the dress code policies and when a complaint is made (and you know you're in compliance), hand them the dress code and ask them to point out where you've violated it.

[HiMow 0]

I wonder if perhaps they didn't say anything before was because they thought it was harder for you to find clothes and shoes that fit well, and now that you've lost weight, it should be easier to find appropriate clothes?

I don't know how much you've lost, but do you think that could be it?

i agree completely!

[BetsyB 9]

It doesn't sound as though you're being punished for losing weight--it sounds as though you were given an EXTREME amount of latitude when you were morbidly obese, but now are expected to conform to the standards set by the company and followed by others.

Do you believe you should still be able to dress differently from your colleagues?

Shorts are not business casual by any definition. Since you love your job, why not decide to stop making waves--to invest in some good-quality clothing that cannot possibly elicit objection, and resign yourself to dressing the way that is required by your workplace. EVEN if there are others who do not consistently follow the dress code.

You can't change others' behaviors. You can't ensure that everyone else dresses appropriately. But you CAN make sure you do.

I would think long and hard before complaining about this issue. If anything, you were shown preferential treatment in the past. This is not a discrimination issue.