I'd like some input.

[lapbandmom89 0]

Hi. I am not banded but my daughter is. She was banded at 18 years of age. That was about a year and a half ago. If you are wondering why I'm posting and not her, she's too embarrassed to use these forums. The other reason I'm posting is I feel like this was an investment for me too as I am the one who footed the bill. I think what I would like are words of advice/encouragement for her.

Here's the deal. Her weight at surgery was 215. She dropped 10 then 9, then up one, down one, up four, down two, up ??, down one, down 12.....anyhow to date she has lost 27 pounds. Yes that is good. I am pretty confident that she would have added that much to her pre-op weight by now if she hadnt have had the surgery. Problem is that she does not communicate well with the doctor and/or dietician. She's really bashful about talking about it so then I end up talking for her going by the things she has talked to me about. She has a 9 cc Realize Band. We were told that it could be "stubborn". At her max fill she was at 8.5 cc (yikes). She then dropped the 12 pounds. Thing is she was going through a break up with her boyfriend at the time and so I think that may have contributed to the 12 pounds. at 8.5 she was throwing everything back up so we knew that was too tight. Anyway the point I am trying to get to is that it never seemed like she got to a point where she was not miserable in one way or another. Either she was in pain or she was thowing stuff up but yet she seemed to be able to eat plenty. I think maybe she was overfilled so was eating poorly (bad foods that would go down easily) so then she wasnt losing. then becuase she wasnt losing she would get more of a fill. Am I making any sense here?

Now to make things more interesting, she is pregnant. the doc took 2 cc out of her band so she is at 6.5 cc. she says she feels good becuase things arent gettting stuck but yet she can eat a lot.

Can someone please tell me that it is possible to get back on track after a year and nine months. thats what it will be by the time the baby gets here. She will have 3 months left of her two years of visits that are included with the surgery. Would someone please tell me that I havent wasted my money. and not just that, I had such high hopes for her. I dont mind the money. I was worth it if it worked for her. More importantly I was hoping it would improve her self esteem. I think she thinks she has to put up with whatever guys want to dish out becuase shes just the fat girl.

is it that hard to find the sweetspot? I would like to call and talk with the dietician but I feel silly doing that as she is an adult. Oh and for the record, no I didnt suggest that she get surgery. She wanted and asked for my help. at first I said I cant help you then I thought it over and looked into financing and decided I would go through with it.

Please refrain from lectures. I need positive replys.:thumbdown:

[ParrotheadCathy 0]

It's very easy for me to say your daughter needs to work on her communication. And not just with the surgeon's office! She's PREGNANT. If she has questions or problems with that she has to communicate that as well. Otherwise, who knows?

I'd suggest some counseling for her. She's got to learn the skills of being self-expressive and developing communication skills. Having your band work for you as it should means you have to work your band. You have to be able to sit down with the medical staff and say "I get stuck every time I eat" or "I have acid reflux or heartburn" or "I can eat everything that gets in my way and plenty of it". Only with her input can the medical staff work with her.

That being said, normally you have to have all the Fluid removed from your band during pregnancy to ensure taking in enough nutrition to support the baby.

[Humming Bird 275]

Hi lapbandmom and daughter,

I was pregnant at age 16 ( my baby is now 27 yrs old, and my grandbaby is 7 ), so you will not get any lecturing from me on that point.

As far as the band, you did not waste your money. The pregnancy just puts a little break in the weight loss. After she has the baby, and after breast feeding if she is going to, just start over with the fill process and finding the sweet spot. I'm not a freak about breast feeding, but if I did it at such a young age, anyone can and should. Breast fed babies are healthier and happier. That may make the weight loss with the band process slow down even more. Your daughter has so much life ahead of her and the band is considered a permanent implant. I have seen many people post that they had "band babies." I am sure they could give you much more advise.

As far as your daughter putting up with crap form guys because she is "the fat girl" ...... becoming a strong woman may take a little time for all of us, thin or fat, but she does need to make a commitment to herself that she will not be treated badly. This will be for the baby as well. It is not good for a child of any age to see their mommy being treated badly and tolerating it.

I will say it again .... You did not waste your money on the band. Please work with positive minds about all of it.

3 years from now you will be in love with that child and can also feel the success of the band.

[crzytchr 3]

Wow, that is a full plate. Ok, she can definitely get back on track after the birth of her baby if she is ready and willing. It is possible for her to keep the fill she has now, as long as she is not getting sick. If she is having morning sickness, though, she should get the entire fill out. Otherwise as long as she can get in enough nutrition for the baby (check with the ob/gyn) then she should be fine.

Now...there is a thin line between restriction and being too tight. It is very possible that she won't reach proper restriction within the 3 months of the birth. You may want to contact the band surgeon and see if they can give her an extension since they aren't seeing her for now. If not, you may just have to pay for a few past the third month. I would probably add 1cc the first fill to get her to 7.5, then if she is not too tight, go very slowly from there, since you KNOW that 8.5ccs is too tight. There are people who get .25cc at their fills just to "tweak" it.

My friend just had her "band baby" last week. She kept her entire fill the whole time, and the baby was 7lb 7oz!!!!

Edited September 23, 2009 by crzytchr

[lapbandmom89 0]

Thank you so much humming bird. I appreciate your positive attitude. I get kind of consumed with this thing for a number of reasons but a large part of it is the fact that that was a lot of money for me to pay. I remember feeling so excited for her the day of her surgery like it was a new beginning for her. She struggled with the band even before being pregnant so I just get discouraged now that you throw this into it. I remember her crying one day and saying "mom you don't understand. This thing can be so painful." So I'm thinking does that mean shes too tight...does it mean she is so addicted to food that she isn't satisfied with a small amount emotionally and eats more than she should....is she eating things she shouldn't? Why would it hurt so frequently? This is a difficult age for me to handle. They want to show you how independant they are but they really still need mom and dad. I thought she had reached the sweet spot at the 8.5 but she'd eat and then walk outside for a minute or walk in the bathroom and up it came in one plop. She lost 12 pounds in one month that month. She was at 8.2 before that but said that she didn't feel that "whoa" feeling like everyone described on these forum and she wasnt losing. Her doc was a little perflexed becuase she kept telling him that she didn't have the right restriction, she knew she had some, but not enough while she was also having some things get stuck. He said that was not possible. That that was two ends of the spectrum... Sometimes she would eat and it would come up then she was fine and she could eat without problems. I'm kinda rambling again. This thing can be kind of perplexing. It would be great if you could just have the surgery, they fill it and off you go....you are at your sweet spot. It took 12 months for her to get to the 8.5 meanwhile weight loss was minimal.

I have asked the surgeon for a few additional months. We'll see what he says.