I dont know what to do!!!!!!!!!!!

[Nykee 13]

renebean,

"I dont know what to do" was a plea to see what I could do to get a more uniform band and not one that only allows a sip of juice at 9am and lots of crap at 9pm.

renebean)

At this point, it is all up to you. You can either take the advice that has been given to you with love and patience, or you can ignore it and continue on the road you are on.

girl)

I know..

renebean)

One more time, I will point out that Pain is your bodies warning that something is wrong. If you feel pain when you try to eat, then you need an unfill. There is no question in anyone's mind - with the only possible exception being yours.

girl)

the "pain" is slight discomfort.. any weird feeling at all..

I read alot about peoples problems in this area

I am managing it very well..

No real pain.. (CEPT yesterday I slimed up some soup.. one slime ball came out, didnt really hurt.. but I dont allow that stuff!)

reneban)

ou say that if you get an unfill, you will "only eat more Soup & crap". I say, that if you get an unfill, you will be able to eat solid foods in the correct bandster way: hard Proteins first, veggies second, carbs last.

girl)

Your wrong about me then, I wont do that.. I know I wont,.

renebean)

Only by eating in this way will you begin to feel full or satisfied. Only by eating in this way will you have energy to face your days. Only by eating in this way will you be able to lose weight without torment & pain.

girl)

I KNOW... I think I am in for torment and pain.

renebean)

By now, you DO know what to do. The only question is whether or not you will do it.

girl)

EXACTLY.. I dont deny it. I wont do it.

NOT CUZ I REFUSE.. (but cuz I know it from EXPERIENCE AND self awarenes)

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!! loves

[Nykee 13]

mousecrazy)

It is also very sad to see that Nykee has asked for help, but didn't really want help at all.

girl)

Not true.....

mousecrazy)

Nykee, to realize that you are on the pitty pot and don't seem to want to get off.

girl)

Honesty I call it.. I feel pitiful and I post it.. sue me.

mouse)

It reminds me of students I have who take a step toward success, then sabotage themselves so they won't succeed.

girl)

ohhhhhh.. I done that ALOT in the last 20 yrs! wow, your insightfull..or is that what so many of us do??

I still do it (NOT AS MUCH)

So, I didnt get all mentally well and perfect before I got banded

(NEVER WOULD HAVE GOT BANDED) lololol

I am trying to find ways around it.. cuz getting mentally well and getting all nutritionally and diet right... just wasnt happening and well, I gotta do what I gotta do NOT to die.

Mouse)

I've always thought they do it because they are simply afraid of what people might expect from them if they ever show their competence.

girl)

IF you have NEVER had a problem with Self sabotage.. maybe youd like to share some of your mental problems.. I mean is self sabotage the worst of them all IYOUR oppinion or what?

mouse)

I'm sure you have a reason/argument against everything.

girl)

well you sure had that effect on me for the firtst time today..

mouse)

Please sit yourself down and discover why you must maintain this victim identity. It could be a life-changing moment.

girl)

Please dont tell me things I have done every flipping day of my life.

Its condesending, rude and assuming.

mouse)

Much hope is sent your way

girl)

well thanks.. but I am trying to live in real time.. not hope.

[Nykee 13]

kathy,

The one question that I haven't seen asked is...What has your doctor said about it?

girl)

I am on my own.

kathy)

If your doctor is not helping you then maybe you need to seek help or get a 2nd opinion from another doctor.

girl)

My band doctors and the entire place is AMAZING! THEY ARE THE BEST>

This is all on me!

kathy)

I hope everything works out for you but don't give up, especially if you have children...they need you more than you need the Cheetos or bowl of Pasta.

girl)

THANK YOU FOR SAYING THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!

Number one: its always good to see it said by another

Number two: They are my life and I havent done right by them and THATS impossible becasue I have done right by them in every other way of their lives cept this one thing and well.. thats proof to me its a disease.

thank you!!!

[Nykee 13]

anwyn)

Nykee, I think you should read the whole thing over again from start to finish.

girl)

I have been.

anwyn)

Do you realize that your main complaint in your first post is that your current diet is making you gain weight.

girl)

It was that I am not losing.

well I was wrong..

I lost 30 pounds in two months.

anwyn)

What's the worst thing that can happen here? You get an unfill and try it out for a few weeks and you gain a couple pounds because everyone here was wrong. According to you, you're gaining weight anyways.

girl)

true and I DID think of that.. but the cost is prohibitive.

But I WAS thinkig about it anyway.

anwyn)

Maybe you're one of those people who will only do things for others but not themselves...

girl)

MY M.O.

anway)

If so, get an unfill for me because I'm going to have to go on blood pressure medicine if I keep reading this thread...

girl)

Me too.. lol

Sorry

[Nykee 13]

DONALI

1. You are NOT hungry - hunger is not the problem for you. You have NOT been hungry since surgery.

girl) well I get hunger pains at times.. but I have never cared about them much at all in my life.. I have gone days without eating in the past and just dont care.... Its just a little weird thing about me.

2. Your sole purpose in getting the band was so that you would not be able to eat - ANYTHING, period. Because if you can eat, you will - hunger or not.

girl)

NO.. smaller amounts of food.. but it doesnt work that way.

but yes, I will eat whether I am hungry or not.

3. Whether you can eat or not, there is absolutely no hope whatsoever that you will make healthier, more nutritious choices. IF you can eat, you will eat more cheetos, more Cookies, more chicken nuggets, more milk, more juice, more Soup. If you CAN'T eat, you will subsist on less milk, less juice, less soup, less cheetos, and less Cookies.< /span>

girl)

yes

I KNOW, There IS 'help' what so ever"..

but I am not willing to keep trying when I have been trying for so long.. trying everything and with 100% effort. and failing.. WHY WHY WHY keep doing that.. I BUT KNOW I STILL DO IT!!!! I HAVE NOT GAVE UP>>

I STILL TRY DAILY.. I just have no hope.. or tiny bit I will ever be able to do itt

4. You have already had so much therapy regarding your head issues with food that you "have a degree" in it.

girl)

I have a bachelore degree in psychology.. Thats what I meant.

I said that just to show I have a tad more experience in the mentallity of it all than usual.

5. Prior to banding, you lost 48 pounds.

girl)

41, yes

6. You want more consistent/stable restriction so that you can have liquids/cheetos/cookies throughout the day, not just at night.

girl)

lol... I guess so...

I dont see it was want.. I flipping HATE them.. lol

Its OUT OF CONTROL.

I tell everyone to NOT to allow the crap, I write it on my grocery list "NO CHEETO"S".. I tell my kids they can never go buy any for me no matter how much I beg.. ect..

I TRY!

Just out of curisosity, how did you lose the 48 pounds?

girl)

Low carb.. under 20 carbs a day.. its eAsy.

Do you really have absolutely no intention of migrating yourself to a more healthful way of eating?

I have EVERY intention.. I want to be a vegetarian too.. I want to cut WAY down on milk products mostly.. (I joined peta)...I do I do I do.

Do you really intend on subsisting on milk, juice, cheetos, soup, cookies and chicken nuggets for the rest of your life?

No.. I hope and I will try to get UNDER CONTROL.. as I lose weight and I get surgery I need and my life becomes "easier", I really think as I can get fit and my life together that will include the eating and diet as well.... we'll see..

I believe once upon a time you said you were a nurse - am I remembering that correctly? Are you supplementing your daily intake with a good Multivitamin like Alex hopes?

lol, nope.. my17 yr old daughter is a sophmore in college trying to get into nursing school. I take a flintstone chewable.. maybe theres more I need though.

I do understand about eating when you are not hungry. I do understand about eating as much as possible, as often as possible, stopping only because I am out of food or because there is literally not room for even one more bite.

I dont do that.. I never have... I mean I have pigged out.. but it wasnt common for me to do. Like For lunch I would have a 99cent plain cheese burger or a small KFC snacker and tons to drink. and be full.

I just drank like gallons a day.

What I don't understand is your inability/unwillingness to include more healthful/nutritious choices in your menu.I'm not talking about cutting out any of your current choices altogether - I'm talking about choosing to eat lean Proteins and veggies first, and then (if it's physically possible), indulging in the less nutritious stuff.

..not unwilling.. I am trying... see my first post.. I have NEVER ate meals and I just cant seem to want to or get any discpline to do so.

I honestly don't know what to tell you - everything I know about banding success hinges on people being able to modify their habits at least somewhat. This is something you wouldn't have to do all at once - make the changes one at a time, in a gradual way.

I think its modifying that I dont cram food into my mouth or try to eat whe my band says no.. or dozens of other things.

If you are able to be successful going about this "your" way then I am happy for you. But it doesn't seem to be working for you too much at the moment.

I lost 30 pounds this last two months so all the crying about not losing weight was for nothing.. I did..

AND YET

I am not all fine and dandy.. INFACT I am MORE motivated to NOT eat the crap at night and try to do it better.

If you had nothing but healthfood foods in the house, you wouldn't eat them? Even if there wasn't anything else? It is not your children's responsibility to resist your pleas to bring home junk food - I cannot lay the blame at their feet.

And they dont.. I try to tell them but ultimately they do as I say.

and or I get it my self. They help as much as possible..

All the blame is mine..

Throughout my life I have often wished I could be locked in a room for a year or so where the exact amount/quality of food I needed to be my perfect weight was slid under the door - nothing more, nothing less. That I didn't even get to see or interact with people - the sole purpose was to have my diet managed for me. It sounds like you might benefit from that kind of fantasy situation.

for sure..lol, I still wish I had like a cook who could cook delious food that was low in fat and sugar so I didnt notice It was "yucky"..lol

Unfortunately, I am unaware of any place like that (I still wish there was one for me!). I have only myself to rely on for my choices. When I choose well my life swings towards health - when I don't, my life swings towards sickness. Sometimes I'm healthy, sometimes I'm not. But I try and make it easier on myself by limiting what I have available at home, so that my choices are a little easier, at least in that one place in my life.

I know.. I do limit what I have at home.. its too easy to go out to fast food or the corner store, that "whats in the house" means nothing... I buy all decent stuff when I grocery shop.. I have made sure my kids NEVER got fat.. (thats the biggest reason)

Hoping you can make a place in your life where making more nutritious choices is a little easier, and that once you make that place, that it grows throughout your life until you come out on the other side a more healthy, nourished soul - inside and out.

((hugs))

THANKS SO MUCH... you really did listen VERY WELL!!!

Good advice too!! (as always

[puddin 7]

This is a friggin' huge thread.

I noticed in this thread (awhile back) the posting about being really tight in the morning. I really appreciated the advice about how food that sits in your stomach at night will cause your stomach to swell. I'd like to add to that: At night we secrete a hormone that keeps us from peeing the bed. It causes us to retain Water. It's the same reason your eyes can be puffy in the morning. My nurse told me that if you drink more Water during the day your body also retains less water (because it sees less of a reason to do so).

[princess_n_thep 2]

Has anyone suggested this yet???

What kind of daily exercise are you doing? Eating less will not help if you don't exercise more. Maybe your metabolism slowed to meet your intake of food. Now you need to SWEAT it out. The band itself is not the magical tool. It is a helper tool to do the diet and the exercise to boost you towards success.

Try to do cardio and some major exercise regimins. I bet you will see a difference. Plus, the endorphins and adrenaline curb any hunger issues. And exercise makes you FEEL healthy and more fit, therefore you won't WANT to eat the cheetos.

My advice: try to do a definite exercise routine. Not just daily walking around work, but serious exercise for 30 minutes a day.

[babsintx3 0]

Hi my friends,

This thread is going no where. Nykee is not listening to the most important message here. Her band is too tight. TOO TIGHT TOO TIGHT TOO TIGHT TOO TIGHT!

She doesnt want to hear the truth so all of you are wasting your time including me!!! She says it is cost prohibitive to get a partial unfill, she can't afford itl,but doesn't she realize that losing her band is more than cost prohibitive? I just dont get it...

First she says she is not losing and now shes lost 30 lbs in 60 days on the juice and Soup and nugget diet. Geeze, why didnt I think of that? I 've been busy eating my Protein, veggies and healthy carbs losing 4-8 pounds a month. I could have lost 15 or more a month if I just drank juice and sucked down Soup and ate nuggets all day. So she doesnt need our help.

Nykee, an educated person would really hear what we are saying. Honey, use that degree in psychology to understand how illogical your statement s are. Thats why the band is the thinking persons surgery. If you dont listen to advice and only listen selectively, you have missed the whole point and you are wasting others valuable time. This is really sad and what a disappointment. You may get to goal this way, but you will always be fighting demons and inevitably you will gain your weight back. If Atkins was so easy, then why get a lapband? You were doing just fine without it.

Can we close this thread before it gets nasty? Cause I am feeling really mean at the moment and it takes a lot to provoke me....

Babs in TX

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Babs in TX

[BlingBaby1 0]

I am in awe reading this thread. I have to say that I am one of the first people to think positive and wish well to others with support or what ever else they may need to help them through a tough time. What I can not believe is how much positive advice and support that has been giving to Nykee only to find that she has pretty much had an excuse or has shot down any suggestions that have been sent her way. I am inclined to think that she might find this amusing or even entertaining.

How many times can one say that you need an unfill and how many times is Nykee going to say I WONT have an unfill?

How many times can one say you need to have better food choices and eat more Protein? How many times does Nykee say she loves the food she is eating & she gets plenty of Protein from her milk and juice?

No more entertaining for me, I'm exhausted just reading the posts that people are given Nykee with love and support, only to find that she is so wrapped up in not getting a unfill or even trying to eat healthy.

The main thing is Nykee's health seems to be at risk, more importantly, I feel, that she really needs to go see her doctor and a Reg. nutritionist.

Nykee I hope and pray that you come around and get this situation taken care of, I don't want to see anything horrible happen to you. Please don't take this post as a bashing session, but I just feel that you are not getting it and no matter what advice is given, you will not except it and you'll just throw yet another excuse our way. I'm with Megan and some others.. all done with this thread.

[Nykee 13]

pnp)

Has anyone suggested this yet???

What kind of daily exercise are you doing?

girl)

I went grocery shopping.. my daughter drove and dropped me at the doors..

I used the motorized cart for an hour and 15 minutes, I got ill..

I cried for 15 minutes on the way home I was in so much pain.

I took crushed pain pills and waited..

Thats as active as I can get

I was going to the ymca for aqua aerbics..

but havent in over a month cuz of my situation... I got no insurence cuz my income fell by 75% and I live in a camper and the YMCA just isnt doable right now... I kept the membership and I wont let the dues lapse! I just cant work it now, I can barely keep me and my kids housed.. everyone running 24/7 for eachother around here..

plus I cant take my pain pills.. (only at night)

I used to take 6 vicodan a day.. now I take maybe 6 a week.. (i am a hurting)

crushing them doesnt work when your unable to take a drink to get them down, Two vicodan crush to the size of a large spoon (its ick)

I have three herniated discs in back

sciatica in leg

and it dibilitates me

[Nykee 13]

This thread is going no where. Nykee is not listening to the most important message here. Her band is too tight. TOO TIGHT TOO TIGHT TOO TIGHT TOO TIGHT!

me)

listen to what I ate today..

1:00.....3 ounces OJ

3:45......whole can tomatoe Soup (with milk) and 6 ounces of milk

6pm.....6 ounces OJ

11pm .........prolly 20 nacho chips with 3 ounces of cheese sause and prolly about 1/4 cup of layered dip... 6 ounces of milk

A slice of rasberry cheesecake... and 6 ounces of milk

1/2 cup lime sherbert

12 ounces OJ

2:45am....3 fish fillets and my guess is 10 to 15 cups (6 ounces of milk)

I AM NOT TOO TIGHT

I EAT PLENTY

She doesnt want to hear the truth so all of you are wasting your time including me!!! She says it is cost prohibitive to get a partial unfill, she can't afford itl,but doesn't she realize that losing her band is more than cost prohibitive? I just dont get it...

ME)

I AM NOT LOSING MY BAND

I NEVER HURT IT SO HOW AM I LOOSING I?

First she says she is not losing and now shes lost 30 lbs in 60 days on the juice and soup and nugget diet.

girl)

I really hope you dont think I am lying..

I didnt think I was cuz none of my close fit difrerently

I lost 31 pounds in 33 days..after my fill

Geeze, why didnt I think of that? I 've been busy eating my Protein, veggies and healthy carbs losing 4-8 pounds a month. I could have lost 15 or more a month if I just drank juice and sucked down soup and ate nuggets all day. So she doesnt need our help.

girl)

so sorry.. my goodness.. I wont make any excuses..

I just Wish I could be you

Nykee, an educated person would really hear what we are saying.

girl)

are you calling me a liar..?? I hope not

Honey, use that degree in psychology to understand how illogical your statement s are.

girl)

ALREADY HAVE AWKNOWLWDGED THAT!

Thats why the band is the thinking persons surgery. If you dont listen to advice and only listen selectively, you have missed the whole point and you are wasting others valuable time.

girl)

dont post to me.. and anyone else who feels the same..

This is really sad and what a disappointment. You may get to goal this way, but you will always be fighting demons and inevitably you will gain your weight back. If Atkins was so easy, then why get a lapband? You were doing just fine without it.

girl)

its easy for a month or two.. I am lost 60 pounds in a month before..

Its yoyo

I may always be fighting demans but I wont be knocking on heavens door.

Can we close this thread before it gets nasty? Cause I am feeling really mean at the moment and it takes a lot to provoke me....

girl)

That wasnt so bad.

Babs in TX

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Babs in TX

[Nykee 13]

I am in awe reading this thread. I have to say that I am one of the first people to think positive and wish well to others with support or what ever else they may need to help them through a tough time.

girl)

good for you.. I am real glad your that way..

I am so sorry I cant keep ya on that roll..

THIS IS ME

THIS IS HOW I FEEL

I guess If its not the RIGHT way, than I have no right to discuss it.

What I can not believe is how much positive advice and support that has been giving to Nykee only to find that she has pretty much had an excuse or has shot down any suggestions that have been sent her way. I am inclined to think that she might find this amusing or even entertaining.

girl)

OK.. thats rude .. I do not find it amusing or entertaining and I am closing the thread cuz you said that.. and I just cant stand anyone thinking like wise.

How many times can one say that you need an unfill and how many times is Nykee going to say I WONT have an unfill?

>>>>AS MANY TIMES AS THATS HOW I FEEEEEEEEEL (ya know, just to save my life thats all)

How many times can one say you need to have better food choices and eat more Protein?

>>>>>today I had ummmm lets guess...200 grams of protein.. my daily intake is prolly around 100.

How many times does Nykee say she loves the food she is eating & she gets plenty of Protein from her milk and juice?

>>The milk.. There is no protein in juice. DUH

THERE Is 10 grams in 8 ounces of milk..

I drank a guestimated 150 ounces today..

No more entertaining for me, I'm exhausted just reading the posts that people are given Nykee with love and support, only to find that she is so wrapped up in not getting a unfill or even trying to eat healthy.

>I try everyday.. I will never say otherwise cuz its not true.

The main thing is Nykee's health seems to be at risk, more importantly, I feel, that she really needs to go see her doctor and a Reg. nutritionist.

>>>loosing the 65 pounds is gonna help me more than anything

soon I will be at 100, where I am allowed my surgeries..

THE WEIGHT LOSS is what I need right now. (and all I can manage.. sorry thats not what you like to hear)

Nykee I hope and pray that you come around and get this situation taken care of, I don't want to see anything horrible happen to you.

GIRL)

me too

Please don't take this post as a bashing session, but I just feel that you are not getting it and no matter what advice is given, you will not except it and you'll just throw yet another excuse our way. I'm with Megan and some others.. all done with this thread.

<!-- / message --><!-- sig -->

girl)

thanks to all and ME to (DONE)

[Fauxnaif 1]

thanks again! The salt thing makes perfrect sense

these are things that can really help

I am not getting an unfill (though I understand why you all say so)

I am not starving AT ALL

anyway.

thanks again.

You are risking your band. You say you don't have tons of money, well what about the money it might cost to remove your band if it slips? You need patience, you need an unfill, and you need to take a month or two off from trying to lose weight.

Fauxnaif

[Fauxnaif 1]

And...this is not how most of us choose to live. We get a good fill level and we eat high Protein foods and we feel satisfied and don't live on liquids.

Unbelievable.

Newbies, this is NOT the bandster lifestyle. This is NOT how it's supposed to be. This is NOT how you lose weight. This is NOT how you care for your band. This is NOT how you get your calories. This is NOT healthy. You can see this is NOT working and if this is how you want your banded life to be, I'd suggest you save your money.

Nykee, your best bet at this point is to take Alexandra's advice. sigh. Why do I keep reading this thread?!!!!!!!!

[MeganA 35]

Babs-

Great idea about locking the thread.

I think an even better idea is that everyone stops responding to Nykee. Obviously there is some serious mental illness going on here and until she's willing to get help, there is nothing we can do. It seems to me that it is a very sad situation. At this point it doesn't appear that Nykee can be rational. The only bright light in this situation is that if she really is losing weight at this rate, the band will loosen on it's own as she loses fat around her stomach.

Thanks to everyone who tried to help. It's a testament to how caring and supportive this board can be.

Megan