Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Seriously curious



Recommended Posts

NO - Shriveled up hags who listen to bad music can't get pregnant - however apparently eating possum helps which you should find plentiful behind your trailer.

Wait, you want me to eat FLUFFY? He's my most beloved pet and part-time lover! :scared2:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

NO - Shriveled up hags who listen to bad music can't get pregnant - however apparently eating possum helps which you should find plentiful behind your trailer.

**Sniff** I believe the words you were looking for are oppossum and mobile home. :scared2:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I thought we were talking about MJ - listening to Stevie Wonder might improve your chance of getting pregnant - give fluffy a break though!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

**Sniff** I believe the words you were looking for are oppossum and mobile home. :scared2:

Hey, hey, HEY, this is a PC-free zone.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey what's wrong with living in a trailor in the ghetto and eating KFC???

Edited by Carrie_C

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't appreciate your candor - what exactly do you find funny. PLease refrain from interjecting into this very serious topic unless you have something constructive to offer - such as a replacement to give fluffy a break!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey, hey, HEY, this is a PC-free zone.

Well, after the danged trailer falled on Fluffy, I started calling it my Mobile home...it moves real quick when the law is on ya

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Though now I have a new question: Should I use a large Anna Nicole Smith-sized dill to push the food down instead of my fingers? They're better tasting, and hey, I can eat more. What do you think? Will my band be safe?

I mean, I'd like to use my boyfriend's.... well, you know... but I was afraid he'd get chicken stuck in the hole.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh, sure. You're band is safe. I snarfed down 3 Big Macs on Tues...banded on Mon. I ordered extra pickles. They were sliced. Hmmm. Maybe that was wrong?!?

Your band protects against pregnancy, pickles, MJ, and stoooopidity. No worries, Beth....you're in good shape.

TPG

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear MRS HAG:

The viewer's of this thread would appreciate a warning before such vulgar images are made all too clear - You will now be expected to reimburse the cost of my dinner which has apparently made a reappearance.

Maybe your pickle would have helped.

Thank kindly,

the legal team

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh, sure. You're band is safe. I snarfed down 3 Big Macs on Tues...banded on Mon. I ordered extra pickles. They were sliced. Hmmm. Maybe that was wrong?!?

Your band protects against pregnancy, pickles, MJ, and stoooopidity. No worries, Beth....you're in good shape.

TPG

Oh THANK GOD!

Okay, then what about my live donkey show? Any worries there of him getting "stuck" in my band?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear MRS HAG:

The viewer's of this thread would appreciate a warning before such vulgar images are made all too clear - You will now be expected to reimburse the cost of my dinner which has apparently made a reappearance.

Maybe your pickle would have helped.

Thank kindly,

the legal team

Dear Legal Team:

Do as I do and drink your dinner and you'll be fine. Plus there is always that added benefit of catching a buzz. Try it. You might like it.

Ms. Hag

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

by buzz - I assume you are referring to the enjoyment of some honey - Correct?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×