Disappointed

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So I have been a member of LBT for a little over a month. Since then I have been banded and have received most of my knowledge about my procedure from this website. I have also been the victim to various forms or harassment and abrasive comments. These things deemed "okay" because profane language was not used but very insulting all of the same.

Why would you come to this website and know that is about receiving and sharing your knowledge about this procedure but yet criticize someone who is trying to change their life? Are you really that miserable? Is life that tough for you?

I may have been over 300lbs but never had to endure the "pain" of being fat. I am very successful for my age and although I was obese, I was content and happy with my life. This is simply for my health. Not to wear the clothes that I wanted..because I already had. Not to attract more men...because I already have a very attractive boyfriend. Not to do more things..because there was nothing that has stopped me from doing what I want.

I have to chop up all the negativity to pure jealousy....

Don’t spend your life being miserable...

Grow up!! Half of these negative comments are coming from people twice my age.

Get a life...and get some professional help.

[Gone4Now 4]

So I have been a member of LBT for a little over a month. Since then I have been banded and have received most of my knowledge about my procedure from this website. I have also been the victim to various forms or harassment and abrasive comments. These things deemed "okay" because profane language was not used but very insulting all of the same.

I have been reading the posts that you put out there, and I like this one the best. Profane language isn't what I personally object to, but it's the vulgar way that you have thrown it out there.

Would you go into a professional environment, speaking the way you speak? I love cussing, I love it all - but there is a time and place for it.

re: getting your banding knowledge from this site - that's not really advisable. We're strangers, many are in the nursing field, but why take advice and knowledge from "us"? I understand that the "hey, do you all have this....?" is normal, but the "I like dick...and did I fuck myself" comments are abrasive and kind of a turn off for most average folks.

It comes across as "ghetto", as abrasive, as offensive - whether or not you are those things in real life. On paper (screen) things can easily be taken out of context.

Why would you come to this website and know that is about receiving and sharing your knowledge about this procedure but yet criticize someone who is trying to change their life?

When I read the sex and chicken question, I didn't see you as trying to change your life. I read it as you asking for "forgiveness" or "acceptance" of behavior that isn't band friendly. You asked, "Did I fuck myself?" My first initial thought, was "yeah, maybe - why not listen to your doctor?"

I don't comment anymore on those kinds of posts because so many people cheat post op, and really - if you're not taking the advice of your professional medical staff, then you're not really TRYING to change anything.

Are you really that miserable?

Is life that tough for you?

This is the kind of path where you lose me. Why get so defensive over it? It takes two to argue, and when you get mixed up in it and start calling names and cussing then others who aren't "in it" are going to take sides, and more than likely take the side of 1) who they have a history with and 2) the person not cussing and acting abrasive & defensive.

I may have been over 300lbs but never had to endure the "pain" of being fat. I am very successful for my age and although I was obese, I was content and happy with my life. This is simply for my health. Not to wear the clothes that I wanted..because I already had. Not to attract more men...because I already have a very attractive boyfriend. Not to do more things..because there was nothing that has stopped me from doing what I want.

That's awesome! I applaud you for that.

My question to you is, if that's how you feel, why do you throw out "fattie" and say things like "You're still fat" to people.

If it's not really a road block for you, why assume it is for others, too? Why throw it out there like an insult, if it's not really one?

I have to chop up all the negativity to pure jealousy....

Don’t spend your life being miserable...

Grow up!! Half of these negative comments are coming from people twice my age.

Get a life...and get some professional help.

And, there, again. Your beginning was positive and upbeat and I took as a general curiosity. It was well written and I thought you wanted to really bridge the gap.

But, then the ending was insulting. Do you want to really bridge the differences between you and those you have argued with, or not?

[justcurious 0]

I have read all of her threads also. She did not get offensive until you all attacked her.

If you dont want her to attack back then you should keep the negativity away from her.

You must not have read everything she wrote when she talked about having her surgery 3 weeks after her first Dr. appointment or not having the knowledge about the procedure that she needed.

She did not start her threads with crude language but if she felt as though she needed to respond in such a way then that is her choice. Like it was your choice to attack her.

I agree, and do think people that have nothing positive to say is just miserable in their own lives.

[*susan* 1,709]

I am closing this thread. I do not want to see anyone else start anymore new threads regarding this issue. It is ridiculous and just plain out of hand.

Additionally, pnkpassion and justcurious are one in the same person.

Edited July 29, 2009 by *Susan*