Called a Cheater

[daqui26 4]

:frown:

well i was on the phone with my sister today and she was telling me about her loss so far from 318 to 289 which i think is great.

anyway she said i have to start working harder so that you don't beat me since you are cheating. now she said this while laughing but i know in her mind im cheating.

i just can't figure out why people think we are cheating. that could be why people keep their surgeries to themselves...to avoid other people's comments/opinions.

i asked my husband abt it and he was like yeah it is cheating, i spent 30 mins (wasted time) trying to explain why i KNOW this is not cheating.

So my question is deep down do you think you are cheating by getting the band?

if i'm a cheater so be it...

[Kristine73 1]

At first my hubs thought it was cheating and was against it. The more research I did, the more he understood, but still wasn't comfortable about the surgery. But he told me, he'd support me 100% in my decision. After surgery, he stayed home w/me for 3 days. When he went back to work, he found out that the sister of one of his co-workers when in for a tripple heart bi-pass at the age of 55. She made it through the surgery, but died the next day. That day, hubs came home, gave me a hug and said he finally understood why I wanted this and he will no longer made 'snide cheating' comments.

I've lost 100 lbs twice, and gained it back, plus some every time. He know weight is a problem for me.

I don't see how making a decision to make a permanent and healthy life change (the band is not a diet but a life change) is cheating. It's a commitment!

No, you are not cheating! You are improving you life! ANd kudos to you for doing so! Though, I will say, I've ran into the cheating attitude from people at work. I just ignore them, though at first it just annoyed me. Now, I think it's jealously that promps the 'cheating' accusation. We had the guts to made a drastic decision the follow through w/it. Too many people let fear hold them back. Or, the have pre-conceived of weight loss surgery and rather than broaden their knowledge, they would rather remain iggonorant. Like my hubs says, ignorance is bliss.

Again, you deserve kudos for looking out for your health and taking a possitive step towards a new you!

[daqui26 4]

you know i wondering if the overweight people who say these things are a little jealous.....maybe envious is a better word. i know years ago i said i would never have surgery but i think deep down i was not brave enough to do it yet. maybe thats how she and others feel.

thanks for responding kristine

[HollyRnOh 0]

I don't think people understand that weightloss surgery of any kind is not easy! We have to live with restrictions for the rest of our lives. For example, I watched my son eat a huge cheeseburger the other day and wanted a bite so bad! But I know what misery I would be in if I indulged. However, that urge was short lived and weighed myself the next day and had lost two pounds. The band makes up for the willpower that I lack on my own. You are definitely not a cheater because you elected to have surgery to make you a healthier person. And the difference is that while people can lose it on their own, they will likely gain it back. I think most of us on this board have done that several times. I applaud anyone who is brave enough to have surgery to make them a better person.

[jujuvee 0]

Now I don't think it's cheating I mean is getting a pacemaker cheating!

But it is somewhat of a crutch, For me since day one after surgery I feel like over 80% of my addiction is gone, I am very rarely hungry and I can eat one piece of pizza and be satisfied for hours where as my husband who is obese still has the botomless pit stomach and does not have anything to trigger fullness.

So if it didn't give us the advantage we wouldn't have gotten it.

[Juniper 0]

this is a subject that gets me pretty emotional.

just one short year ago, i myself thought of weight loss surgery as the "easy" way, and felt that people who had to undergo surgery to lose weight were somehow more lazy than others. now i realize that LOSING weight's not the hardest part. it's KEEPING it off. and that sure, the surgeries help a person lose weight, because it forces you to take in less calories, but that's not why most of us get the surgery. it's because we've lost weight in the past, only to gain it back, and then some, and we're trusting that the band will help us not only lose it, but KEEP the weight off.

i'm a cheater because i want to be able to QUIT yo-yo-ing up and down, and causing my body more harmful effects from doing this?

i'm a cheater because i want to live a healthy, longer life?

i'm a cheater because i don't want to be morbidly obese anymore?

nevermind that i'm dieting and exercising right along with all those non-banders...

[Bunz1969 4]

you know i wondering if the overweight people who say these things are a little jealous.....maybe envious is a better word. i know years ago i said i would never have surgery but i think deep down i was not brave enough to do it yet. maybe thats how she and others feel.

thanks for responding kristine

I think you hit it right there - I think it has a lot to do with jealousy. I remember when my bro-in-law had RNY gastric bypass 3 years ago thinking and saying "Wow, it must be nice to be able to afford a quick and easy way to lose weight, why the rest of us have to struggle" Man was I WRONG! I have watched him struggle a lot more since his surgery than ever before.

It's ignorance and jealousy.

[Kristine73 1]

i'm a cheater because i want to be able to QUIT yo-yo-ing up and down, and causing my body more harmful effects from doing this?

i'm a cheater because i want to live a healthy, longer life?

i'm a cheater because i don't want to be morbidly obese anymore?

nevermind that i'm dieting and exercising right along with all those non-banders...

You said it!

I've lost 100 lbs ... twice! Of course, I gained it back, plus some! I have to diet and exercise to lose the weight w/the band. I see it as a tool to keep the weight off!

[jen_e 0]

Hear Hear to all the above.

Slim people have also said it's the easy way out or a drastic thing to do. But they dont understand what it is like to yo-yo diet and feel like crap and worry that you'll die or have a stroke and be a burden, not see your children/grandchildren grow up, not enjoy life cos you are uncomfortable/embarressed, cant get around so well, buy nice clothes etc. etc.

Hell no! We aren't cheaters...we want to live healthy, happy lives!

[daqui26 4]

Hell no! We aren't cheaters...we want to live healthy, happy lives!

that made me smile

[daqui26 4]

thanks to all who have responded so far...im sure there will be more posts to come

i know im not cheating but to be told that was like wow thats how you see me...i thought i was trying to get healthy.

there's lots of ppl who have the band and still weigh the same if not more. i know i still have to work and change my eating...its a lifestyle change.

:thumbdown:

[Unforgettable 0]

I think people are entitled to their own opinions but shouldn't push it onto others. Cheating for everyone is different. For some people, any assistive devices other than doing it natural, like pills or surgery, will always be cheating and taking the easier way out. While I don't agree with that thought, I can respect it as long as they can respect the decision that I've made. In the end, this is a personal decision we've all made. Would I lose this weight if I didn't have the surgery? Probably not. Does that make it cheating? I don't really care what it makes it. Call it cheating, call it using my resources, call it what you want...I'm calling it success.

[daqui26 4]

Call it cheating, call it using my resources, call it what you want...I'm calling it success.

hey

you need to add that to your signature, i like it

[bearbandit 0]

Well I actually lost 165lbs without the lapband about 6 years ago....Guess what I gained most of it back. This sent me to a new low. So I decided that I wanted to make my weight loss a permanent thing. So that is why I have lapband. Once you get down to your goal weight then its there to keep you in check. As for people that say its cheating. I disagree. You still have to eat healthy, do all the exercise and make wise decisions. Talk to your friends that complain and say its 'cheating' a couple years down the road and see how much weight they have gained back. Very few people keep it off. We all overeat for different reasons and we will all fall off the wagon, but the band gets us back on very quickly.

[Julia_N 2]

Yeah, it's cheating ... cheating death! :smile: