Frustrated and need a little support...

[vjsmiles 0]

I am not banded yet. Just in the serious thinking about it stage. I've done a lot of online research, waiting for a book on it to arrive, and have seminar coming up next week.

I've only talked to my parents, husband, and one coworker about it. The coworker had gastric bypass in 2002, so she is very supportive. My parents and husband are wishy washy.

My husband tells my it's up to me, BUT makes sure to tell my that it's a huge lifestyle change that I will have to stick to and he's seen my quit everything else, blah, blah, blah.

Like I don't know all that already! If I was able to stick to any other diet plan, I wouldn't be looking into this!

My parents wish I wouldn't think I need surgery to loose weight. My dad keeps telling me to eat better/less and exercise. He's close to 300 lbs, diabetic, strokes, high BP, etc. He should know the struggle I am having.

I know this would be a huge lifestyle change and there will be ups and downs emotionally and physically. If I were to do any diet/exercise program, it would be the same. I am looking into lab band because I am tired of being fat and battling with my weight. I want to loose weight and be healthy, and from what I have read, the lap band would be the biggest committment for me and something I would HAVE to stick to. I would pay completely out of pocket, so I wouldn't go into this lightly and waste all that money.

Anyway, I'm just feeling really alone right now, as I am sure most of you have felt at some point. Thanks for letting me rant, a little! LOL! :biggrin:

[Chooky 0]

Hey I got banded 6wks ago. big changes for me and the family. My husband the same and I have like you quit on everything to do with it so far. But the 28 may was the start of my new life... Now I think about it I did it for me and no one else, the bonus is the others in the house are also benefiting from it. I have down day's with it but more up's definatley I have lost 10kilos and 2 dress sizes and once the kids are back at school the gym begins. In your heart your decision is already made on what you will do, I went to talks and groups to learn more but really I knew it was a done deal, it was my last chance, no more guilt or worrying over to much crap, no more stress, it all just comes naturally, you have no choice you can't pig out.

cheers chooky

[mystery83d 0]

I know it's a big decision. I was banded a month ago. It's been a huge lifestyle change, but I was tired of always being overweight and decided this was the best option for me. My family, friends, and co-workers are still very supportive and that helps. In a month I has able to lose 14 lbs.

There are days that are harder than others, and I have to make a conscious effort to not go back to my old ways, but it gets easier everyday. It's the best decision I've ever made. If you decide to have the band just make sure you do it for yourself.

[RestlessMonkey 7]

Ok Bad news...you do not HAVE to stick to "the lap band". You can eat around it. Some do. That's just a sad fact of life. If you want something that is closer to 100% guaranteed, get the duodenal switch.

Good news: The band makes it MUCH easier to stick to the diet part of "diet and exercise", IF you are committed to losing. It does not make it easy...but it makes it easier. What percentage of people lose weight and keep it off with diet and exercise alone? Something like 5% I think? With lap band the average is much higher, the odds are in your favor, but it's not guaranteed. So be ready to work!

If you are committed, though, it can be darn near miraculous.

[emmylou 0]

I attended a seminar where a surgeon talked about several WLS's and who could benefit from them. I wish I kept the paperwork and I would tell you what he said.

It was in regards to your eating style. If you are a "grazer" the lap band would not be the best choice for you (according to him) since you would be eating many small meals all day and consuming more calories instead of small meals with no eating inbetween.

I was eating three meals a day. Big meals and not so smart choices. The lap band would be for someone like me. I'm looking forward to being able to eat a small meal and be satisfied until it's time for the next meal. I'm able to lose while dieting and exercising, but the smaller portions would leave me starving and I would still overeat healthy stuff. I'm not a snacker or grazer as he put it. I cannot remember the surgeons' suggestion for grazers.

Maybe you can attend a seminar that covers several options and then research which you think could benefit you best.

I'm looking at the lap band as a tool to keep me satisfied with my healthy choices as well as a tether to keep me in check when I feel like falling off the wagon so to speak. But it is true that you can self sabbotage by sucking down high calorie drinks like milkshakes, etc.

Good luck with your choice! :biggrin:

Edited July 8, 2009 by emmylou

[Catherine55 43]

You are definitely not alone -- and good for you that you decided to post here! I've gotten so much support from the other bandsters on this site. It's a really great place to go when you have questions, need to vent, or just want to be able to say how great you feel because the band is working!

I love my band. I was banded about 8 1/2 months ago, and it has made a world of difference. There is no way I could have stuck to a diet perfectly for this long -- and still be excited about getting to goal. If you round up to the nearest pound, I'm down 50 lbs at this point (OK, 49.6!) and I feel fantastic.

I hope you make the right decision for yourself! The band is a big commitment, but if you're up for that part, it makes losing weight so, SO much easier.

Best wishes,

Catherine

[vjsmiles 0]

Thank you for your responses. I realize that people can fail with the lap band and that is always on option, but I just feel like this is the way to go for myself. I just got really down when the people I love weren't jumping for joy about it. I guess I should have expected it. It is surgery and nothing is 100% guaranteed.

[~*~*~Panda~*~*~ 0]

I swear you are telling MY story!!! lol i understand 150%! I am not yet banded and have failed everything else. i am also self pay 100% (yikes) For me i feel it is the right thing. From what i understand (banded people jump in at any point if i am wrong) over eating is near impossible unless your downing milk shakes and ice cream! I'm not big into those... my worst enemy is bread which i am willing to give up to be healthy and sexy! I'd say listen to yourself! i know when people told me that it was frustrating because i was so lost on what i should do! i go on this site every single day to keep me motivated and look at the success peope have had. i know i can have that too! So can you! i'd like to add you to my friends list because we have so much in commen. Maybe we can help eachother :thumbup:

[RestlessMonkey 7]

From what i understand (banded people jump in at any point if i am wrong) over eating is near impossible unless your downing milk shakes and ice cream!:thumbup:

Sorry, you're wrong. I wish you weren't. You can overeat by grazing, or eating softer foods, or things like chips, enchiladas, etc...it's a little different for each person but no, the band doesn't make it impossible to overeat as long as you avoid the high fat dairy treats you mentioned.

It makes it EASIER to control overeating, and EASIER to make "good" choices. But not impossible to circumvent it, or most everyone would lose most all their excess.

It's a great tool. But it isn't a panacea.

[~*~*~Panda~*~*~ 0]

Thank you for clear this up i know im not one to be giving advise since i am not yet banded :thumbup:

[RestlessMonkey 7]

Panda don't feel that way...we all have something to contribute and we are all learning still!

I WISH the only way we could gain was by milk shakes!

That would be too cool! :thumbup:

[chefla 0]

Ok I just got banded on monday 7/6 and all I got from people is the same as you "why don't you just diet and exercise?" I feel so alone in my decision. Yesterday 2 days post op I told my husband I lost 10 lbs since a week before surgery and he said "you should have stopped eating all the crap before surgery and not done it" I don't know why people aren't more supportive but I think your only friends are going to be the banded ones. Anyway all the negative people really made me so scared. I cried the morning of surgery while I waited in the hospital to be wheeled in. Let me tell you that was a waste of time. I feel so silly now that I was scared. I had no pain afterward and still have no pain just a feeling of being full all the time. It is amazing that I am on an all liquid diet and I'm NOT HUNGRY. This is just what I have always needed to diet. Its now 3 days post op and I have been on liquids since Monday and it is not bad at all. My mouth misses chewing but I am so glad I did it. My children are really supportive and my husband is now trying to loose weight as well. Yesterday he had salad and grilled chicken for lunch and was grumpy an hour later because he was starving and I said "well that's why I banded because all I had was liquid and I'm not hungry". Good luck to you.

[HappyHour54 0]

I am hoping for the same results.I am having the surgery on July 20.I have not told many people as not to hear all the advise from people who don't struggle with weight issues.I don't think of myself as a big snacker but just a wrong eater.I am paying for this(charging)not covered by my insurance.I am sure I will be posting soon!:frown:

[sms1964 0]

You are doing the right thing by gathering information. This site is a wealth of information. I too was on the fence. I did research for 2 years I think. I am a life time member of weight watchers, which means I once hit my goal weight and kept it off for 6 weeks. That was a long time ago, when loosing 25 lbs would get me to goal. I am now a tad over 100 lbs overweight. I did weight watchers about once or twice a year for about 10 years. I'd loose, then get frustrated and stop, and etc etc etc... I am now getting banded on Aug 8th. It was a hard decision, I do not make decisions lightly. The best advise I can give you is to gather all information - good and bad, and make a decision and stick to it. Its a chance to change your life - for the better. We are all here to support you!! best of luck and keep us posted.

[momofkatie06 0]

I guess I have a mixed feelings in my family. All my friends and ,y husband are very supportive, but my mom and dad are the ones going do you really need to do this. With only 9 days till I get banded. I am really anxious about it. Good luck!!