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Shrinking Violets Part 4



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So 4th was weird, Leslie had a melt down, and I realized this was the first year in like 3 years she hasn't spent 4th of July in rehab. She ended up having like 4 xanax and 2 wine coolers (that caused a fight between my parents, some reason my dad said she could have em..) anyway.. and then drove home upset and crazy.. and hit my brother's car.. and drove off. She literally couldn't keep her head up. Sadly, I was indirectly involved in what pushed her over the edge, so I feel like shit but I had no idea I was part of it... anyway.. drama drama.

Carson went swimming for a minute, check out my Facebook I got great pics of him wasting away in Margaritaville lol.

Then dad wanted to look at the pics I took, and I had some certain BATH pics on there (oh jeez), so he goes 'Is there anything on here I can't see?'--- a question routinely asked and I've always laughed and said "NO". This time I actually had to go 'Uh...' and he said "Oh no, I'm soiled!!" and ran off while I deleted pics off my camera. I need to empty my pics more often.. ahem.

Everyone loved the sopapilla, mom ate it till she literally got sick.

My granny... :smile2: :)

She has a mother's ring her mom gave her (it was hers originally). So as a kid I loved it, granny said when she passes I could have it (when I was a kid she told me this). So on my 18th b'day she says "I was going to give it to you, but..." Then on my 21st birthday and my wedding, she said the same thing. Somehow it got brought up today and she looked like she was going to cry. She said she wanted to give it to me past Thanksgiving since I was pregnant, and she went to get it; and it's GONE. She said she must have misplaced it, and she's looked everywhere and can not find it. She planned on leaving a note when she was gone saying sorry, if I find it it's mine. This really upsets me, probably more than it should.. just because I love my granny so much and I always knew one day I'd have this ring that was special to her, and to her mom (which I didn't know, but hear great things about). I know it's just a ring, but.. ah, I dunno, I always looked forward to having that ring one day for what it represented.

She said her mom gave her a pretty cameo ring too, so she said she'll give me that.. but it's not about having 'a ring', it was the mother's ring.. blah blah, anyway.

Hope you all had a good 4th, Jane I'll try to write up instructions on how to clean your computer tomorrow.

Tracy she is too cute!!

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Good Morning, Violets..

I'm up and showered and ready to head to Kris's to pick up the grandkids and take them back to their mom and dad. Sure was disappointed that they couldn't get in the pool yesterday. The pool people will hear about it tomorrow for sure.

I stayed at the house last night with Grady so Kris could go with the kids and watch the fireworks. They didn't think Grady would like all the noise. Well, he sure made a lot of noise himself!! He had two really bad crying jags. The first one I was able to calm him down by singing to him. The second he just wouldn't stop for anything so I just rocked him and he finally wore himself out and fell asleep. I know I couldn't handle that baby all day, every day. More power to Kris!

Hope everyone had a good 4th. I was able to eat a whole hamburger and an ear of corn. I need to do the 5 day test again or at least a day of liquids to get my restriction back to where it should be.

Off to write in my journal and then get on the road. Everyone have a great day. Be good to yourselves!

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Laura, I'm sorry about Leslie....and the ring. Kind of a bummer day. My mom lost a 1 carat diamond pendant...we can't find it anywhere. She probably put it somewhere 'safe' and now it's most likely in the trash or given to charity! Well, maybe God had a plan to bless someone else who really needed it. All hope is not lost for your ring -- it may still show up! Besides, when your granny eventually passes you'll probably end up with lots of her things around your home to remind you of her. I love all the things of I have from my mom's and aunt's estates...something in every room.

Last night Evan went over to his girlfriends' for a couple of hours and I already started to feel the old anxieties coming back to haunt me. UGH!! But I feel better equipped to handle all of it now ... sorta. LOL

Today is LAUNDRY LAUNDRY LAUNDRY!!! Gotta start getting packed and organized AGAIN! I must have 5 loads to do today. But at least now I have two little slaves to help me! HA! All I gotta do is get them out of bed!

Love you girls -- hope you have a good day.

Suzie -- please take care to get some rest today! Turn your dang phone off for starters!

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:) good morning everyone.

I :( Oh well, I won't do it again. Have a good day....

Edited by TracyK

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hi girls

hope everyone had a great 4th.

Concert was good, except for the part where Kev bailed on me and our kids. After all the begging he did to get me back and worked so hard, his mental state has spun so out of control that he can't do it anymore. So needless to say, our wonderful dd wants nothing to do with him and never wants to see him again for what he has done over the years, but this week was it. I will never forget 7/4 because in a sense it was one of the worst days of my life. How did I know i was going to need to be medicated this week?

Yesterday i was numb, today i can't stop crying, He sent me a long email, and that is supposed to be my closure?

His years of abuse has made me feel worthless and weak, and this i have realized now, and i stood up for myself Friday in front of our daughter, no yelling, just being strong, and he turned it into me - she needed me to be strong, how can she grow up to deal with anything different than she knows.

38 years old, and other than 2 great kids, i have been alone most of my life, i regret so much which is making my mental state so much worse.

Thanks all for listening, i just need to get it out, I have not been able to eat or sleep for 2 days and i'm just not doing well.

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Jenn, I wish there was something I could say to make this all better. Know I am sending out prayers and good thoughts!!

My nose was all stuffy yesterday, today it moved to my head. Ouch!! But it is better after some drugs. You can still see the cottonwood drifting, allergies, YUCK!!!

I woke up today and had three pop ups from the triple x place.

I hope Pamela is having fun!!!

Suzy I hope you are taking it easy!!

Terry in case I don't get back on, have a GREAT trip. You deserve it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Morning Girls.

Laura, hopefully the ring will show up sometime. I do that, think I'm hiding something and than I forget where I put it. Months later I pick up a jar or box and it rattles. Yup, there it is. Good Luck.

Got up this morning and woke my nephew up. We got something to drink and changed our clothes and than out the door we went. A little over a mile walk. I told him that it was not a free ride here. He was going to exercise with me and he was to go to work EVERYDAY. I don't care how bad he felt. Short of puking his guts out. He was to be out the door every morning. And he is to attend a NA meeting everyday, even if he had to walk to one. Just so happens there is one everyday close and someone will be able to go to each meeting with him. No excuses. He's still on the fine line with all of us. So far today he has vacummed to pool and my car. I'm not riding him real hard but he's not getting away with thinking this is a vacation. I'm not sure how long he will be here. The girlfriend is going to see how it goes and if he's making a effort. There is a lot om mending to do before she will allow him back into the house. He was clean from the time he got out of rehab but after his accident last week he got ahold of a few pills and couldn't keep me from finding out. Friday he was carrying a load of laundry down the stairs and cut a step short and went down 7 steps and landed on his back and neck. He's fine, nothing broke. But they did a tox-screen and that was when the girlfriend found out. Because he was a fall patient and at risk, they felt that it be best someone stay with him. My younger sis and I were at the ER and there is no way she could stay so it was left up to me. We are back on that long road again. Keep your fingers crossed that this time he stays straight.

Talk about letting your eating get out of control. Well, you all will be very proud of me for keeping in great. Except for the cupcake last night I have been a model bandster. And believe me it has not been easy. Not one bit. I swear if there was a Dairy Queen ice cream cake here, I would eat the whole thing.

Judy, We didn't swim yesterday. There was a bad storm all night and then it was just too cloudy and cool to go in. Today it's only supposed to get up to about 82 but the sun is shining, so we will see if I get in or not.

Everyone have a great day.

Terry have a safe trip and enjoy your time.

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I feel crappy and now feel bad for feeling that way because so many of you are going through so much bad stuff!

Not sure, I just have the blahs. Rick has his crew coming over today for a cook out so my "day off" is cancelled. He says "don't worry about it" yeah right. 6 couples assorted kids, and another 6 single guys--who all think bringing a 12 pack is the same as bringing food-----so I have been cooking for most of yesterday and this morning. And while he has tomorrow off, I do not. He is treating me VERY kindly as he knows I am ready to blow!!!

Wine is helping.......

Jenn try wine....

Suzanne help yourself to a glass too......

Laura, you aren't nursing now, try wine!!!

Not really, not trying to turn you all into lushes like me!! I am not usually one to drink at things like this, I think I will need it today, there are people coming I do not like.....but there is no way to eliminate just certain employees.....

And the guests begin to arrive.......wish me luck.....

hugs to all of you going through crap, and I am so glad for those of you not!!!

smooches

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Good Luck, Kat. Enjoy what you can.

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So quiet here. For a minute I thought everyone was back in Ala. LOL.

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Well, we had to clean the house of any and alcohol and drugs since DS is back and I'm on Day 2 of sober living. Just because I "can't" have it, i want a glass worse than ever, of course! But I'm gonna do what he's doing -- one day at a time -- I think that will help him. I'm thinking I'll restrict myself to the occasional glass when I go out with friends. If I have a hard time sticking to that rule then it's all the more reason I should stick to it!

I think I've done SEVEN loads of laundry today....maybe eight. I don't think there's a dirty sock or shirt in the house.....until tomorrow!

Speaking of which...the dryer is beeping! Laterz.

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Well, some of us are back, but some are still traveling or getting ready to travel. Such is the life of a Violet.

We're back from taking the grandkids back. We stopped at the Casino and did our normal $20 a piece. I made $57.50 and Bob lost his $20 so we came out a bit over even. The kids were happy to see their mom and she was thrilled to have them back. It's awfully quiet here now, but I still have my yorkie babies to keep me company.

Tomorrow is my hospital shift.. first one in two weeks so there will be tons for me to do. Ethan will be here on Tuesday. I've missed having him here. He was here for a little bit on Saturday while his mom and dad worked and we had fun outside. I'm anxious for the pool to be swimable (is that a real word?) again. I got a sunburn on my arms at the parade Saturday. Funny, I sat outside in Alabama many times in the heat of the day and didn't get a burn, but an hour in the Alpena sunshine and I'm beet red. Go figger.

I'm going to head to bed and read for a bit. Everyone have a good evening. sleep well.

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