I've decided to forgive myself....

[KMCD 0]

Okay, so I had this huge epiphany yesterday and decided that I need to forgive myself for being so overweight for so long. I am always beating myself up for over-eating, for feeling too fat to sit on a porch swing, for having to look at the very last dress on the row of dresses for the "big girl size", for having to go to a different store because they don't carry my size, etc, etc... Well, yesterday I just decided, it was ENOUGH! So, now I'm only going to be nice to myself and when I hear myself say something about my big butt or my flabby arms, I am going to stop myself and then say something positive.

Well, low and behold, I opened the new Oprah magazine and there is an article regarding that VERY idea!!! Of course, I left it at home and I'm on break at work, but when I get home, I'll add the info from the article and a little excerpt. I was floored!

I just wondered how many of us are really angry at ourselves for getting into this position and haven't really considered forgiving ourselves and moving forward. To me, I just can't move forward if I harbor ill feelings about myself. I feel that if I don't let go of my tortured past, I am doomed to repeat it...know what I mean?

Hope everyone is doing well...

[myturn2bhappy 0]

KMCD- great post! I have to work on this myself. Thank you for pointing it out and making me think.

[KMCD 0]

Ok, so I said I would put more up about this last night, but with the kids, getting ready for bed....I just didn't have time.

The article is called "The Easier Way to Diet" by Martha Beck

She talks about a five-step plan to help master your "beastie brain" and "relax the weight off."

She makes four key points about our brains and how there are several layers to our brains. Basically, the "wanting to be thin" (cyberbrain) part of the brain is always at war with the "feed me now" brain (beastie). This also relates to the nervous system that goes back and forth between "fight or flight" and "rest and relaxation." Obviously, when the cyberbrain is in control you naturally restrict your intake. Repeated dieting and constant negative thoughts theoretically rev up your fight or flight/beastie brain.

She has come up with five steps to combat the issue and calls it SO FAR:

S - Stop - feeling anxious, hating yourself, just ate a ton? Stop and shout "Nature break!"

O - Open - once you are by yourself work to get back to that "rest and relaxation" part of your brain by Opening up. Relax your body by opening your lungs, your eyes and stretch your muscles.

F - Forgive - She says this is the most important step. You must forgive yourself and your body. Make a list of things that you've done right, don't just focus on having eaten those 10 Cookies (yeah, I used to be able to do that! No MORE though!). She says that eventually, you will reach self-forgiveness and the "calm observer" part of the brain will become more active.

A - Accept - Once you can forgive yourself, it's time to allow things to happen as they do. (sounds sort of like the AA mantra - "accept the things I cannot control")

R - Renew - From that place of "stillness, openness, forgiveness and acceptance, you can Renew your commitment to any eating plan you like."

Is it over simplified? Sure. But I like the idea of forgiving myself for being overweight, for choosing poorly that day, past days and past years. I want to accept myself now and enjoy my new body as it begins to change through this process.

Good luck to all of us! I look forward to our weigh ins on Friday. We have SO FAR to go in our journey, but at the same time, we really have come SO FAR...Thanks for reading...