Please help, so confused! :-(

[Want2BeThin 0]

I have been lurking here for close to a year. During this time I did go as far as requesting all the paperwork from the clinic here that performs the lap band surgery. So, why am I consfused? Maybe I have just been reading too much? As I read through the posts here I am just left feeling like this is more work than it's worth.

Let me explain. If I'm going to put myself through elective surgery then I want it to work. I see soooo many people complaining of all these horrible problems. It seems their days are just as miserable as they were before the surgery if not more. If I do this I want to live a normal life. I don't want to be making calls in the middle of the night to the dr or ER visits, vomitting all the time. Can't hold this down or that down. Or the horror of not losing any weight at all!

I'm 40. I'm tired. I'm in physical pain from being overweight. I want to start enjoying life. I want to be healthy. I want to be able to go on vacation which I can't do now because my back hurts so much I can't walk that much. I want this surgery to help to control my eating. But I want normalcy in my life. I don't want to be consumed with thinking about food and my band all the time!

Is this surgery worth it? Are you living your life now with issues on a daily basis because of this band? Are you spending more time thinking about food than you were before you did this? I know there are many pros and cons here but do the pros far outweigh the cons?

Please. I'm looking for some honest feedback here. I am miserable now and I need to lose weight for my health. I just can't diet anymore! I was hoping this band would be a useful tool in controlling food consumption.

Thanks for reading!

[Cleo's Mom 257]

I think the band works differently for different people. Some get to their sweet spot where their restriction reduces hunger and allows a small amount of food to satisfy them. They do not have any problems with pain or reflux or heartburn. There are others who seem to be willing to put up with a whole host of problems and complications to lose weight and reach some magic number on the scale. Theirs are the posts that begin with all the pain and problems that they are having and then saying.. but I love my band..I have lost "x" amount of weight. The band is suppose to make you healthier than you are now by helping you to lose the weight that you need to in order to improve your health - whether it's joint pain, sleep apnea, type II diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesteral or high triglycerides among other things. The band is not suppose to create health problems, make you sicker or cause heartburn, reflux, vomiting or pain - provided you are following the eating rules. You need to find an experienced doctor whose philosophy about the band reflects this. Some doctors won't listen to patients when they have problems. Then you'll need to find a new doctor, like I did. You also must have realistic expectations about the band. You might still be hungry. You might not be able to reach your sweet spot. You might not be able to eat some foods. Each person is different as to what their band won't tolerate. You will have to exercise. But it seems like you have done a lot of research and I wish you the best of luck.

[RestlessMonkey 7]

I'm 54...I LOVE my band. I am losing more slowly than I hoped but I am losing. It gives me hope that I may actually keep the weight off. I have honestly never once regretted it or wished I'd done something different. I think it is just short of miraculous. I eat less and am happy with that smaller amount. I feel like a "normal" person. I don't PB, I don't slime. I don't hurt. I feel wonderful. The way I eat now, no one would know I have the band if I didn't tell them. I have a friend visiting who wanted chick-fil-a the other day...I ate 1/2 of a chick fil a sandwich and 2 waffle fries and was full and happy. I think that is just wonderful. I wouldn't trade my band for gold.

One thing I think that may help...find a surgeon you like and trust, and then TRUST that surgeon. Listen to him/her. Do what s/he tells you, not what you read here. Trust the pro to guide you. The anecdotal info here is nice but it should never replace medical advice and knowledge. And remember people often post their problems. They don't often post to say "Hi just wanted to say I love the band and have no questions".

Edited May 24, 2009 by RestlessMonkey

[Jachut 487]

For me, the band worked JUST like you are imagining.

[Cassy 0]

Based on my experience and knowing several people with different experiences when compared to mine...I think you have to know the following and be ok with knowing this for yourself.

1.) The surgery is a personal decision and if you decide you are ready to go for it because you have to make a change for your life then you are ready to do it and do it right.

2.) You must understand that while it sounds like magic, it is not. It will not be magic...waking up and all your weight is gone overnight. It takes time. The normal weight loss with no working out and barely eating right is about a quarter to a half a pound a week at best. IF you eat good but don't exersize much then you might get double that. IF you exercise and eat better at a gradually increasing rate then you will hit the one pound to two pounds a week rate. Even with all of this you are going to be working on changing your metabolism as well. The longer you've been obese - the longer it will take to change this. (IN my case it was 25 years of being over 100 pounds overweight).

3.) The longer it takes you to learn how to chew and manage the band rules - the higher your changes of causing yourself problems associated with eating too much, too fast, the wrong things, wrong combos, etc. (i.e. all the things people are complaining about...) Many are caused by user error.

4.) Your health care provider will probably seem like they are slow to fill you and they will tell you that you are doing fine. This will be infuriating because you will compare yourself to what you thought would happen or to what others experiences have been. You have to realize that just filling you up to let nothing through will cause more damage than not having a band at all because you have no re-learned eating and timing and choices yet. IT takes a great deal of time, trial and error, trying and re-trying in different situations to re-learn how to live and eat in a healthy way.

5.) When you first get your band, your mind will not be changed like your stomach...again, it takes time to reset and unlearn bad behaviors.

6.) Somewhere around the 6-8 month mark - you will start to view food differently. This is about the same time that your fills should be catching up with your brain to have the tool working to help you think about food differently (i.e. food is not a reward system or something to do when you're bored). You start to only eat because you know you need to or because you really and truly do feel hungry.

7.) Somewhere around this time you will have a bad episode with alcohol that will teach you that you no longer have tolerance for a lot of it. NEgative reinforcement of what you have already been told re-establishes the new eating pattern...just like the PB'ing that you see people talking about here. THe only time I have trouble is when I blatantly disregard the rules and then you know I remember it next time or the time after that when I have a bad episode.

It's all learning. You just have to commit to it taking time and effort.

What I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt is that the two years of saving money so I could pay for my surgery in cash (insurance wouldn't pay) was the best decision I made and I think it made me more dedicated to making it happen because it wasn't given to me on a silver platter. (At least for myself I think this has been a contributing factor).

Best of luck on your journey!

[RestlessMonkey 7]

Please understand that it is individual...for example while I know Cassy obviously put a lot of care and concern into her post, her experiences are not necessarily going to be yours. Some may be...some may not be. Just realize that many of us don't have problems, issues, negativity. You can discuss your concerns with a good surgeon, too...that should help you.

[Cassy 0]

One more thing I just thought of...it really does matter who you choose for your surgery. Surgeon error can cause a higher incidence of slippage and other issues, so too can their instructions to you before and after surgery.

Do as much research as you can on your surgeon before you choose. I chose mine because his complication rate was second to none and he'd been doing gastro surgery for 30 years...was a pioneer in the field of laparoscopic surgery and he has a ton of surgeries under his belt.

I have had no issues at all (outside of my own not following rules.)

[Want2BeThin 0]

Thank you all so much for your responses!!! It really has helped a lot.

Question Cassy, how does one go about researching their surgeon? There are only 3 doctors in my area that are currently doing this procedure.

[mljalways 1]

Ok I have to cime in on the original post. I am 42 and love my band! I am at 8.5cc's in a 10cc band. On occasion I PB, yes I have slimed once or twice. This has occurrred mostly when I dont respect my band and try to eat to fast or eat more than I should. Again, let me say I love my band. I too have lost slower than I wanted but my doc says slow and steady. I have bben able to kick my high blood pressure to the curb and no longer require meds for it. As for the type 2 diabetes meds, I have decreased dosage at every check up. After all the update I have to say that I love my band HOWEVER, I have made life changes and if you are not ready to put in some work, the band wont work. You have to be committed to making your band be successful FOR you. It is not a miracle for weight loss, it requires work from you. Just my two cents. Good luck

[dange25 57]

hi there. Like you, I'm not banded and have been looking at paper work for a long time. you mentioned in your post "I don't want to be consumed with thinking about food" and its funny you know....thats really what got us into this trouble in the first place. Not thinking about what we are doing. It dawned on me that, not thinking about it *and being happy doing so* is the reason why I have a massive overeating problem. Maybe we need to change our thinking to get us out of this mess. I am tonight looking fwd to having a weigh in after 1 week of *thinking carefully* whats really going into my body cheers....good luck

[ParrotheadCathy 0]

Want3Be, I agree 100% with Restless Monkey. Cassy named some issues that I don't agree with...they may be less widespread than she thinks. I haven't had any problems at all. I'm down 60 pounds (that's almost half of what I want to lose) and I'm less than 4 months post-op. Yeah, I've PB'd a couple of times but it's not the end of the world and IT WAS ALL MY FAULT for eating too fast. Now, as for the amount of problems you read about on here, some of them I attribute directly to whas sounds like some doctors don't provide their patients with enough information to succeed. Check to see that the doctors you are considering offer group support, nutritionist session(s), that sort of thing. If a doctor doesn't offer that, then you should probably look elsewhere. My doctor's staff includes a psych, a nutritionist and several "lap band advocates". The advocate's job consists mostly of helping patients with all their questions both pre- and post-op. They are a lot easier to get to speak with than the surgeon and they have been trained to answer questions. I found that to be the best single thing I had going in the early post-op period. There are many times the number of people who post here who have never been on any online forum but who have moved steadily along with their success. Remember the old adage about the squeaky wheel? Well, that's what you notice, the squeaky wheel. Some of these people look to this group for all their answers and solutions, but the truth is your doctor should always be your best source for information. So in your process of choosing a doctor, be sure to look for support at that level too.

Some doctors are very conservative with fills so it may take longer to get to your sweet spot. But that's not true of all of them. I had .6cc in my band after sugery. At 1 month out, I got my first fill and they gave me 4ccs. That was actually too much and about a half-hour later, they took out 1cc. I've had three more fills, am now at 5.6ccs and if this isn't my sweet spot, it is so close I'm having a hard time telling the difference. My surgery was February 10 and my last fill was just slightly over 3 months out from my surgery.

Lastly, Cassie was incredibly spot-on on this: THIS IS NOT MAGIC. THIS ISN'T A NO-BRAINER. You have to make the right food choices. The band will most definitely limit how much you can eat, but it cannot prevent you from eating slider food....and that will keep you from being successful. Some of the stuff that goes down the easiest is the stuff you really have to learn to walk away from...ice cream, chips, milk shakes, candy, Cookies even. Now that's not to say that I never eat a little bit of a birthday cake, but I do not troll the pasty aisle at the grocery store or stop at the bakery to gaze lovingly at the goodies. You do have to exercise some self-control in your life, and this is one of those times (time after time after time!). When somebody offers you something that is basically empty calories (like Desserts, full fat cheese, full fat dressing, and many other things), you have to say NO THANK YOU. The difference between saying NO THANK YOU with the band is that you can be well satisfied without eating all that crap while says NO THANK YOU on just a diet may leave you later wishing you'd eaten it.

Sure, there are people this doesn't work for them, but I'll be bold and say that 99.9% of them aren't using the band to the fullest. You can eat around the band. You can eat around gastric bypass. You can probably eat around the gastric sleeve but I don't know enough about that to offer up an opinion.

[lapbandtalker 0]

I have been lurking here for close to a year. During this time I did go as far as requesting all the paperwork from the clinic here that performs the lap band surgery. So, why am I consfused? Maybe I have just been reading too much? As I read through the posts here I am just left feeling like this is more work than it's worth.

Let me explain. If I'm going to put myself through elective surgery then I want it to work. I see soooo many people complaining of all these horrible problems. It seems their days are just as miserable as they were before the surgery if not more. If I do this I want to live a normal life. I don't want to be making calls in the middle of the night to the dr or ER visits, vomitting all the time. Can't hold this down or that down. Or the horror of not losing any weight at all!

I'm 40. I'm tired. I'm in physical pain from being overweight. I want to start enjoying life. I want to be healthy. I want to be able to go on vacation which I can't do now because my back hurts so much I can't walk that much. I want this surgery to help to control my eating. But I want normalcy in my life. I don't want to be consumed with thinking about food and my band all the time!

Is this surgery worth it? Are you living your life now with issues on a daily basis because of this band? Are you spending more time thinking about food than you were before you did this? I know there are many pros and cons here but do the pros far outweigh the cons?

Please. I'm looking for some honest feedback here. I am miserable now and I need to lose weight for my health. I just can't diet anymore! I was hoping this band would be a useful tool in controlling food consumption.

Thanks for reading!

Honest feedback, here you go-

the surgery is not for you if you are not willing to change how you consume/use/medicate yourself with/eat- FOOD.

You must want weightloss bad enough to risk (and you know the risks) having the procedure.

For me- it was worth it.

[Malaika 50]

I have been lurking here for close to a year. During this time I did go as far as requesting all the paperwork from the clinic here that performs the lap band surgery. So, why am I consfused? Maybe I have just been reading too much? As I read through the posts here I am just left feeling like this is more work than it's worth.

Let me explain. If I'm going to put myself through elective surgery then I want it to work. I see soooo many people complaining of all these horrible problems. It seems their days are just as miserable as they were before the surgery if not more. If I do this I want to live a normal life. I don't want to be making calls in the middle of the night to the dr or ER visits, vomitting all the time. Can't hold this down or that down. Or the horror of not losing any weight at all!

I'm 40. I'm tired. I'm in physical pain from being overweight. I want to start enjoying life. I want to be healthy. I want to be able to go on vacation which I can't do now because my back hurts so much I can't walk that much. I want this surgery to help to control my eating. But I want normalcy in my life. I don't want to be consumed with thinking about food and my band all the time!

Is this surgery worth it? Are you living your life now with issues on a daily basis because of this band? Are you spending more time thinking about food than you were before you did this? I know there are many pros and cons here but do the pros far outweigh the cons?

Please. I'm looking for some honest feedback here. I am miserable now and I need to lose weight for my health. I just can't diet anymore! I was hoping this band would be a useful tool in controlling food consumption.

Thanks for reading!

Not to throw a kink your chain; however, I too, was set on the band, until I started reading abou the VSG and reading members on there who had had the band and had revision surgery to the sleeve for various reasons and first time sleevers (like I will be) .... now I am 1000% sure that I am going with the sleeve as opposed to the band. Before you make any decisions, you might want to check out the Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy section on this site ... lots of very knowledgeable people with lots of honest answers.

I know that there is a war of sorts between bandsters and sleevers, so I apologize to anyone who doesn't agree with me. However, she did ask for honest feedback and should know both sides of the coin before making such a life changing decision.

[Cassy 0]

I used this site and a few other websites related to weight loss surgeries in addition to medical background tools online. You can also find out a lot from calling the doctors offices and asking questions. I tended to trust my own personal experience when calling the doctor coupled with experiences of people on this site. My Doctor, Kirshenbaum in Colorado had successfully helped close to a thousand people who were on this site which made it a pretty easy choice but I didn't find him until I had done a ton of checking in Mexico and the US.

[Cassy 0]

Vegas...can you tell me more about the sleeve? I am interested in hearing about this. I see it mentioned here and there but I don't understand how it works.