Is anyone keeping their surgery a secret?

[Wisteria75 0]

I haven't been banded YET; provided my insurance approves me. Anyway, I plan to keep it a secret. The only people who know I may have it done are my husband, my sister, my cousin (who's had the band), a friend (who's had the band), and everyone at work (6 people). That's it.

I feel most people are way too judgemental (that I know). If I told my mother, she would think it is cheating as well. People don't know enough about the band to realize that WE are working, not just the band. The band is a tool! It makes me crazy knowing people with this mentality. THAT is why I made my choice. It is my choice and not theirs. :mad:

Can anyone help and tell me what they have told people? For instance, if I am approved and banded end of October or early November, we all know Turkey day is coming up. I am known to eat lots of sweets. If my family sees me not eating so much they will wonder. :sad: And I just refuse to tell them the truth. It's my truth not theirs.

[fatmom 0]

My surgery is Monday. My closest friends know, the people at work who have to know, and that's it. Well my immediate family. I have NOT told my parents because my mother will be disappointed in me.

I attended a support group meeting last week and people's comments about "Taking the easy way out" was one topic of conversation. It made me so angry that I wrote a letter to Dear Abby and explained how this is SO NOT easy and asked her to let her readers know. So, let's see if she prints it and does us all a HUGE favor.

[Stacy1980 0]

When I first started with the process - I told a lot of people and now kicking myself in the ass for that. Some people (especially the ones who are closed minded) do NOT need to know. If they ask me how its going - I just brush it off and say "i decided to hold off on it". My closest friends who truelly know me and my struggle with the weight know. My wonderful supportive family knows. My ex-husband...definetly doesnt know. I will tell my manager once I get the approval and the surgery date. Thats pretty much it ...oh yeah!!! and this entire forum knows :mad:

[maddan 0]

When people learn that I am having surgery I just tell them that I am having a sex change procedure. Ha!:thumbup:

[cruzlady 0]

4 people know about my upcoming surgery ..

My husband and daughter , and my 2 best friends .. Anybody else asks why I am going to the hospital, I just tell them its a female thing .. that makes the men back off and the women just shake their head and say -- I'm sorry..

[BillOh 13]

I just tell them its a female thing .. that makes the men back off and the women just shake their head and say -- I'm sorry..

I did the exact same thing and it works! :thumbup:

[Soexcited 64]

I am not telling anyone EXCEPT for my husband (he's getting a band too...we have the same surgery date) and My Mom and Dad and my husbands Mom and Dad. THATS IT! One thing that I have found out allong my lifes journey is that I tell too many people too much stuff about me. This time it's all in the family.

[OnTheWay to Thin 0]

I have told very few people. 1 Friend at work, who is having sg too but telling everyone it is female issues, and a couple of non work friends then my brother. The thing is that each time I eat around someone that knows it reinforces why I did not tell everyone. Was at a party last weekend, there was some Snacks, some corn chips and salsa, cheese dip, that sort of thing, I took 1 corn chip with salsa and ate that, only 1 and my brother says can you eat that?

We went camping with a friend who knows and she either always comments about how little I eat or that she is impressed that I was able to eat more than the last time she saw me eat... I dont need food police, this is hard enough without all that and frankly it is no ones business.

Edited September 9, 2009 by OnTheWay to Thin
typo

[ParrotheadCathy 0]

Heck, I told EVERYBODY. Strangers, even, LOL. I must live in rarified air because I have not heard even one vaguely negataive comment from anyone. I've gotten a lot of curious questions. But if anybody ever says you're cheating consider telling them this:

If I had a heart condition and a mechanical device or a valve transplant would help my heart keep working you wouldn't say I cheated. If I lost a leg and wore a prosthetic, you wouldn't say I cheated. How can doing something that HELPS me to not suffer be cheating? Remember that I still have the responsibility for what goes into my mouth .... bad choices or good ones. I still have to decide whether or not to get out of the bed at 5:00 AM to walk/run/skip 4 miles before I get ready for work. Explain to me how that is cheating.

[angiemk1972 0]

I am only telling family. And 1 very close friend, who I consider family. Like others I have failed sooooo many times with weight loss, and comments are always made. So I will get it done (hopefully..Financial issue no INS coverage for Band) and surprise them all.

[BillOh 13]

I am not telling anyone EXCEPT for my husband (he's getting a band too...we have the same surgery date)

Have you considered separate surgery dates so you can help each other? My wife and I were a couple of month's apart and we were able to help each other out quite a bit. I can picture the two of you wanting something and neither being very able to get up and get it.

[BillOh 13]

Explain to me how that is cheating.

Your preaching to the choir, unfortunately there are a lot of ignorant people out there, and many of us choose not to have to interact wtih them.

[omgodzilla 0]

My Mom kept her surgery a secret from everyone except me. Even my Dad didn't know until two weeks prior to the surgery itself!

My Mom didn't tell anyone because she didn't want to deal with the judgmental and ignorant remarks she might have gotten from people. There are always a few negative individuals and she didn't want that on top of the stress from the upcoming surgery.

So, she waited and announced it a couple of says after the surgery.

I am in the process of getting the lap-band and only my DH knows. Actually, I am not telling many people about it even after I have it done unless they ask about my weight loss.

This is a somewhat person surgery for me.

[desidaricsmom 0]

I am scheduled for my band on September 14th. I wasn't going to say much to anyone originally, but I told my mom, siblings, close friends and a handful of coworkers. My manager knows only because I'll have a lifting restriction (I am a nurse). Apparently my mom has spread the word to some other family members, I don't appreciate it, but I really don't care about their opinions either. I don't want to be percieved as a liar, but I don't want to be judged either. When it comes down to it, you are the one that has to live with your decision, either way. Good luck to all!:w00t:

[BooCakes 0]

I've only told my husband, my parents, my sister and my best friend who is like family. I just don't feel like watching everyone "watch" me after I get the surgery. Even though you tell people 1-2 pounds a week, I still feel like they will expect bypass results. I just want to focus on me, feeling good and getting my routine and health in order without worrying about what others may be thinking. I have a friend who told everyone and she said people are ALWAYS asking "so how much have you lost so far?"