Am I right to be angry and frustrated?

[Angie1985 0]

I just wanna say you're not alone... Even knowing that bandster hell is coming doesn't make it easy to deal with. It's frusterating and disheartening. I've lost almost 30lbs total, about 15 since being banded about six weeks ago. But for the past two weeks, all I've done is hover around the same weight. I'm going for my second fill today, and I can't imagine how much harder I'd be finding it if I wasn't already started on fills. Good luck and hang in there!

xox

[IndioGirl55 32]

I used to think this forum was a little too kiss-assy and all cotton candy and sunny skies.

Seems the closer someone gets to their goal weight, or past their goal weight--it's all aboard the bitch train.

Donna - Don't be a hater - I would think that pple would find the advice of a successfull bander informational. And I wasn't a "B" to anyone..

wow people are mean. this is where we can ask questions right? i think her frustration is valid. you can do as much research as you want sometimes in life you dont know the right questions until you are experiencing the situation. indio you sound frustrated.:smile: i was just banded 2 weeks ago. i have alot of questions i am frustrated too. be nice to each other, havent we all had a lifetime of beating up on ourselves?. lisa, keep your chin up.

Melmeow

I don't know how you think I'm frustrated - I didn't beat anyone up - I gave my experience with the band and asked a simple question and prefaced it with "not meaning to be a smart arse"

In my experience of researching I knew about bandster hell - knew that it takes time to get restriction - knew that most of the work was up to me - I am just surprised that so many pple here don't know this stuff

Have at it pple - just know that it takes a while to get restriction and even with restriction you will still get hungry

the weight isn't going to fall off over night - and this is hard work - pull up the bootstraps and move on - it's doable..

As to crappy doctors - can't help there - and changing usually isn't an opionon as most doc's won't take another docs patient - you can find them but it can be hard

[salsa1877 10]

I'm sorry you think I am "mis-informed." I did a great deal of research on the band before my surgery and knew the life style changes that I was committing to. And I never thought the band was a magic bullet (and not sure how I implied that I did). That is one thing my surgeon was very clear about -- it not being a magic bullet. However, what was not explained to me was that during the healing phase you don't have restriction -- plain and simple. Even though I knew you had to get adjustments, I guess I expected that I would have the level of restriction I had after surgery. And I never read that in any research I did prior to surgery about bandster hell. The only place I have read about it is here on these forums. So, yes, I am disappointed that my surgeon did not explain that to me before I was put off an additional 2 weeks. I have read of numerous people on here who have had their first fill at or about 4 weeks.

It isn't necessarily true that you won't have restriction during the post op stage. I didn't have my fill until 5 weeks out and I had restriction the entire time. For some people, just the band itself is enough restriction. I lost most of my weight being completely unfilled.

I am not trying to dismiss you concerns and frustrations, but a lot of people read these boards and I don't want them to think that EVERYONE goes through bandster hell.

I have to admit that I have not read past the post that I am responding to so maybe some of these things have been said. This portion of the process really is for healing and learning to make good food choices. If you can practice now, when you get your fills THEN you can really see it work. However, if you just coast along until you get you fills it is going to take you even LONGER to lose weight.

[A New Woman 1]

It isn't necessarily true that you won't have restriction during the post op stage. I didn't have my fill until 5 weeks out and I had restriction the entire time. For some people, just the band itself is enough restriction. I lost most of my weight being completely unfilled.

I am not trying to dismiss you concerns and frustrations, but a lot of people read these boards and I don't want them to think that EVERYONE goes through bandster hell.

I have to admit that I have not read past the post that I am responding to so maybe some of these things have been said. This portion of the process really is for healing and learning to make good food choices. If you can practice now, when you get your fills THEN you can really see it work. However, if you just coast along until you get you fills it is going to take you even LONGER to lose weight.

Your point about bandster hell not applying to everyone is well taken. However, it sounds like that is not the norm, but hey this band is not a one size fits all and it's trial and error for everyone. I'm going to post an update to my drama so you'll hear more.

[A New Woman 1]

**UPDATE TO MY DRAMA**

I spoke with my nurse bariatric coordinator today regarding my frustrations. She was VERY gracious and thanked me for giving her my feedback. I told her that I was simply expressing my frustrations so that others could learn from my experience. She explained that although they try to be thorough maybe they didn't spend enough time focusing on this aspect. Furthermore, that she has done over 200 surgeries and still learns something new from each of her patients. I found it very refreshing that I could explain my frustrations and they be heard by the nurse (and not criticized or have her assume that I was eating the wrong foods, or had unreasonable expectations like some here told me). We talked about how easy it is to drink Water, what foods I've advanced to and she agreed that I'm definitely in need of an adjustment. She also apologized for the phone problems and delays in appointment scheduling they had. To mitigate that in the future, she went ahead and scheduled me for some additional fills which we can cancel if I don't need them. So now I feel like we have a plan in place which is great. That is the kind of support I was lookin for and I don't think it was unreasonable to expect. And she certainly understood where I was coming from.

Thank you to those who actually heard my frustration and didn't make it about something it wasn't.

[heartfire 4]

**UPDATE TO MY DRAMA**

I spoke with my nurse bariatric coordinator today regarding my frustrations. She was VERY gracious and thanked me for giving her my feedback. I told her that I was simply expressing my frustrations so that others could learn from my experience. She explained that although they try to be thorough maybe they didn't spend enough time focusing on this aspect. Furthermore, that she has done over 200 surgeries and still learns something new from each of her patients. I found it very refreshing that I could explain my frustrations and they be heard by the nurse (and not criticized or have her assume that I was eating the wrong foods, or had unreasonable expectations like some here told me). We talked about how easy it is to drink Water, what foods I've advanced to and she agreed that I'm definitely in need of an adjustment. She also apologized for the phone problems and delays in appointment scheduling they had. To mitigate that in the future, she went ahead and scheduled me for some additional fills which we can cancel if I don't need them. So now I feel like we have a plan in place which is great. That is the kind of support I was lookin for and I don't think it was unreasonable to expect. And she certainly understood where I was coming from.

Thank you to those who actually heard my frustration and didn't make it about something it wasn't.

THAT is FANTASTIC!!! So glad you were heard and she actually listened to you! You must feel so much better! I know I would!

Best wishes on your journey! Take care!

[Cleo's Mom 257]

As to crappy doctors - can't help there - and changing usually isn't an opionon as most doc's won't take another docs patient - you can find them but it can be hard

Well, I can help there because I did it. It wasn't hard. I just did my research and my new doctor's website says he takes patients who have had WLS previously. If her doctor is inexperienced or just isn't very good, then she owes it to herself to find a new one.

[arellano8 0]

I agree with your frustration. I was not informed AT ALL about the lap band. My dr. only did bypass gastric until about 6 months ago. So all the meetings I attended only refered to bypass gastric. So when I was told I had no restrictions and i had to be on soft foods for 3 weeks which only consist of 2 oz. for each meal it is tough. I will get a fill on May 5th I was banded on 4/8

[peaches9 3]

THis whole thread can be summed up in one word (and its a word you used)

D R A M A

somepeoples lives just can't be without it

[Lolagirlie 0]

Lisa, I'm glad you got the support you needed from the dr's. office. Again, I cannot stress enough, there are great surgeons out there that can do both, operate and care!!

[NurseMelly 0]

Lisa,

Indigo's post was actually really spot on. I know it's hard. My own doctor won't do fills till 8 weeks post op and then it's an evaluate every 6 week thing. I was banded in January and I am just now getting my 2nd fill next week. I can't just call and come in for a fill and while I understand that is frustrating, try and look at all you can be doing right now.

I am logging all my calories on dailyplate and exercising 6 days a week. I've lost 38 pounds since surgery. And while, yes, that's not 70 like some people you will read about, it's a loss. And since I'm doing all the right things now, I know that when I hit restriction it will only make the weight loss that much easier. What I'm trying to say is use this time to develop the life long habits we need as banded people. You can do it! Good luck!

[IndioGirl55 32]

Lisa,

Indigo's post was actually really spot on. I know it's hard. My own doctor won't do fills till 8 weeks post op and then it's an evaluate every 6 week thing. I was banded in January and I am just now getting my 2nd fill next week. I can't just call and come in for a fill and while I understand that is frustrating, try and look at all you can be doing right now.

I am logging all my calories on dailyplate and exercising 6 days a week. I've lost 38 pounds since surgery. And while, yes, that's not 70 like some people you will read about, it's a loss. And since I'm doing all the right things now, I know that when I hit restriction it will only make the weight loss that much easier. What I'm trying to say is use this time to develop the life long habits we need as banded people. You can do it! Good luck!

Rigth on NurseMelly !!! You got the right mentality !!

38 lbs in just a little over 3 months WTG:thumbup:

It's hard work even with the band - even at your sweet spot

I work every day to make good food choices and work at not eating around my band - and realize that when I want candy , Cookies chips etc - I'm not really hungry for food but want to feed something else (emotions boredom etc).. Those things don't have nutrition or fuel for your body..

Also props for the exercise - I know for me it's key in losing the weight and maintaining it too..

Keep up the good work...:rolleyes2:

[A New Woman 1]

Lisa,

Indigo's post was actually really spot on. I know it's hard. My own doctor won't do fills till 8 weeks post op and then it's an evaluate every 6 week thing. I was banded in January and I am just now getting my 2nd fill next week. I can't just call and come in for a fill and while I understand that is frustrating, try and look at all you can be doing right now.

I am logging all my calories on dailyplate and exercising 6 days a week. I've lost 38 pounds since surgery. And while, yes, that's not 70 like some people you will read about, it's a loss. And since I'm doing all the right things now, I know that when I hit restriction it will only make the weight loss that much easier. What I'm trying to say is use this time to develop the life long habits we need as banded people. You can do it! Good luck!

Thanks for your input Melissa. As it turns out my surgeon's office would have done my fill sooner had it not been for the scheduling delays. I have been trying to do exactly what you say as far as making life long changes. I gave up pop (for which I was addicted) and am quite proud of myself that I have gone 2 months without even a sip and don't miss it. I have not had Cookies, cake, ice cream or other junk and have been making very good food choices, just eating more than I know I'd like to be able to eat. Hence my frustration about the lact of restriction and lack of guidance from my surgeon's office. As I posted earlier, the nurse coodinator was very glad I brought that subject of bandster hell up since she is the one to instruct the classes. I've also begun to exercise on a regular basis. Somehow my lack of restriction and frustration on not really understanding this phase of the journey has been translated into me not following the guidelines of the program. That's okay. Whatever. I'm happy now that I've got the support from my surgeon's office. I have a plan in place for my first and next couple of fills and am more than happy to continue to make the changes necessary. I WILL be successful with my band. Failure is not an option for me. Also I am choosing not to focus any more on these last few weeks. I will, however, offer support and encouragement to others who are feeling frustrated like I have been.

[jms462001 9]

It isn't necessarily true that you won't have restriction during the post op stage. I didn't have my fill until 5 weeks out and I had restriction the entire time. For some people, just the band itself is enough restriction. I lost most of my weight being completely unfilled.

I am not trying to dismiss you concerns and frustrations, but a lot of people read these boards and I don't want them to think that EVERYONE goes through bandster hell.

I have to admit that I have not read past the post that I am responding to so maybe some of these things have been said. This portion of the process really is for healing and learning to make good food choices. If you can practice now, when you get your fills THEN you can really see it work. However, if you just coast along until you get you fills it is going to take you even LONGER to lose weight.

I was also one of the lucky ones who had some restriction right up until my first fill 6 weeks after surgery. I never experienced the "bandster hell". It must be tough.

[NurseMelly 0]

Rigth on NurseMelly !!! You got the right mentality !!

38 lbs in just a little over 3 months WTG:thumbup:

It's hard work even with the band - even at your sweet spot

I work every day to make good food choices and work at not eating around my band - and realize that when I want candy , Cookies chips etc - I'm not really hungry for food but want to feed something else (emotions boredom etc).. Those things don't have nutrition or fuel for your body..

Also props for the exercise - I know for me it's key in losing the weight and maintaining it too..

Keep up the good work...:thumbup:

Thanks so much! I'm one of those people who hates to exercise so I'm forcing myself to get up every morning at 4:30 am to get it over and done with for the day. It's hard but gets a little easier every day. I'm hoping one day the exercise fairy will sprinkle some "cardio dust" on me and turn me into one of those people who just loves to exercise!

Lisa,

I didn't mean to imply that you're not following the bandster rules. I just wanted to let you know that even with a fill, it is hard. Restriction doesn't always happen right away. I'm at 4.5 cc's and don't have restriction. Just wanted to prepare you and give you some hope that you can still work the band in the meantime :smile: