Confused, Scared, borderline depressed.

[MDSanta 0]

It's been a little over a month since surgery. I have gone through all the basics steps after surgery and even had my first adjustment. So what's my problem?

Well for starters, I understand this is not a miracle cure and I was very proud to know I had lost 30lbs by surgery date and another 15 by my first docs appointment. By the time I was first adjusted though, I had gained a total of 6lbs back. Which I can understand was due to being able to eat actual food again. I'm still not sure if that's normal or the doc just seeing the glass have full.

On the first week after surgery everything was perfect for me, I was actually feeling full with minor amounts, it was like a blessing. But as the swelling went down my appetite has grown back to normal. Even after an Adjustment I can still literally eat anything (although i had a bad encounter with a chicken breast the other day) and while the amount might not be what I used to eat 2 months ago, it is quite close. I don't feel like I am going anywhere lately, if not back to normal, and that just scares me.

The surgery has taught me to eat slower and chew more often which is good, but I was hoping it would make me feel fuller faster.

Is going up normal so soon? Right now I am at 4.5cc's in a 12cc or 14cc (I forget) band. How many cc's or adjustments did you have to get to find your own "sweetspot"?

One trick I noticed for myself was to go against dr's orders of drinking 20 minutes after a meal and do it in 5 to 10. Once I take a small gulp of whatever I am drinking it hits me instantly like I ate two cows. Although I don't think I should be doing this, it is what seems to be working for me recently.

[MissBS 3]

Hi. It is really hard until you get good restriction, and that can take a few fills. Don't be discouraged - you are doing great. I had NO restriction after my surgery, none after the first fill, and none after the second fill. I was trying to just eat what I was supposed to and not what I could - because l really could eat as much as before my surgery. After my third fill I had good restriction and got fuller faster and on less food. That time between surgery and restriction is rough. Some people gain and many just lose a little bit. It is good that you are practicing eating slower and chewing lots. That will help you once your band is tighter. I didn't practice that like I should have and it made it harder for me when I got restriction. Just hang in there and do the best you can. Good luck to you!!!! Becky

[lotzasunshine 2]

If I had lost 40+ lbs in a month I would count myself greatly blessed! It took me almost 6 months to lose 40, and another 3 to get to 50! You seem to be doing fine, so don't get too worried.

[MDSanta 0]

of course I am greatful for the weight loss I have done so far. But most of it was pre-surgery, in which I had started to liquid diet way earlier than recommended.

I guess I am looking at my status pre surgery and was hoping it would be easier to keep the ball rolling post surgery. But it seems like its going to be a little while before I can take full advantage of it.

I don't really wanna go back to the preop diet, while it was semi bearable, it can drive a person insane after some time. My mother prepares all my dinners but seems to find it hard to decide on what to cook that is healthy for me. So I just started to contemplate on joining one of those meal clubs like jenny craig or nutrisystem but it seems they can be quite expensive. Any suggestions?

Or maybe I can try to create some kind of meal plan. Which would probably be cool for a regular person, but she's the type that likes to replace ingridients with stuff shes more accostumed to cooking. Just today alone we had a minor argument in which I kept telling her to bake the chicken cutlets while she kept trying to convince me to pan fry it cause it was just "a little" bit of oil.

[suepro 39]

Its early days for you and you have done great so far, you have not reached restriction yet, not many people do after just one fill, it can take a few to get you to your 'sweet spot'.

If you are feeling very hungry, why not call your bariatric team and book another fill. Make sure you are eating very slowly and chewing very well, also ensure you have plenty of Protein as that fills for longer.

I would not think drinking so soon after eating is helping you as it will wash your food down quicker and leave you hungrier. I was always told to leave at least 30 minutes after a meal before a drink.I do however make sure to drink plenty between meals.

good luck, you will get there once you get filled to the right level.

I was banded in November 08 , started my pre op diet in August and have lost 90lbs since.

Sue

[debbie_7155 0]

congratulations on your weight loss, though i think you are drinking too soon after a meal, i got told 10 mins before & 1 hour after meals

[PrincesaJenE 0]

I'm kinda having a similiar experience. I was banded on 2/13/09 - exactly 2 months ago today. I lost 20 lbs the first month (Yay). I felt fabulous. My goal is to lose 3-5 lbs per month. I felt like I was on a roll. I was a little surpised at how much I could eat. There is a model of a stomach with the lap band in my Doc's office and it looks like the stomach is the size of a walnut. I had also been warned that my stomach could accomodate about 6 grapes worth of food. I could easily eat a cup - a cup and a half of food. What I could eat was definitely less than the gobs of food I could eat before but I had this idea in my head that I would take 2 bites of a sandwhich and be about to burst. Au Contraire.

I was supposed to get my first fill at 4 weeks out but because of some complications with finding my port we decided to wait 2 more weeks. When I returned 2 weeks later I had GAINED FOUR LBS. I was devastated. My Doc said it was okay - that the band before your first fill is open and attributed the weight gain to this. I received 4 ccs. I felt like a I got full a TAD bit faster but not much. Since then I have become scale obsessed and weigh myself 3-5 times a day (ok - maybe more - basically every time I go by the scale)

Week 7 according to my home scale, which can be a little capricious, I lost about 9 lbs. Week 8 I shot back up like 6 lbs and pretty much stayed the same all week.

I returned to the doc this past saturday for what I thought would be another fill. I had lost 3 lbs. So basically I was at a total weight loss of 19 lbs (1 lbs less than I was a month ago). The doc asked me how much I could eat, I told him a cup or so, he said that sounds perfect. He said I should be losing about 1-2 lbs a week - no more. I told him that I stay full for 3-4 hours. He said I was doing fine and would not give me a fill. I was so excited about getting a fill because I want to see steady and substantial weight loss - which I feel I'm not getting right now. But my doc insisted I was doing well.

I felt a little discouraged yesterday but now I'm feeling okay. I looked through some of the before and after pics on one of the posts and I saw so many people with dramatic weight loss. It was then that I realized that I probably am right on track. One girl lost 100 lbs in nine months. If you break that down that is 10 -12 lbs a month. I've lost 20 in 2 months which would mean 100 lbs in 10 months. To lose 100 lbs in 10 months would be AWESOME. So I'm gonna give it some time and see how it goes.

Edited April 13, 2009 by PrincesaJenE

[ParrotheadCathy 0]

In that time between surgery and your first fill, you live in bandster hell. People often gain a few pounds as they make the transition from liquid to mushy food and then to "real" food. I didn't lose anything after my first fill, but after my second (three weeks after the first), it started to fall off. Have faith!

[EmmaWang 0]

I've had my first fill last week at 4.4 cc. I thought the fill would bring a lot of restriction on me, but in fact it didn't. I could still eat a lot of food and feeling hungry again after 3 hours. Of course this does not mean I could eat as much as before the surgery. It is much less than that (probably just 1/3 of what I used to eat). But I definitely eat more than 1 cup of food at lunch and dinner. I have no problem eating all types of food: chicken, bread (I was only testing), fish, shrimp, pork, vegetable, fat free cheese etc. I could eat maybe 5 OZ of meat, 2 OZ of tofu and 2 OZ of vege at lunch or dinner. After the meal, I could even have a kiwi fruit. I am not discouraged because I know it might take a few fills to reach the sweet spot. I'm going back to my doctor again at the end of this month for my second fill.

[lessme 0]

Please don't get discouraged. Almost everyone goes through this period of distress, worry and feeling like what good is this doing. I was banded in June of 2008 and I didn't lose any weight for 5 months because the fill nurse I had didn't put in ANY fill (she was later fired). When I finally started getting filled I started losing. I have now lost about 45 lbs. I didn't have too much to lose but I had a lot of health issues due to my weight ( diabetes, blood pressure, cholestrol). I have gone from a size 14 to a size 4 in pants and an extra large to a size small in tops. It will happen as soon as you get enough restriction. Now I struggle with distorted body image. Everyone says I am skinny and I still think I am big. My therapist says to take time looking at myself in the mirror in my underwear. So far that has not worked. Good luck and don't be too hard on yourself.

[MDSanta 0]

Please don't get discouraged. Almost everyone goes through this period of distress, worry and feeling like what good is this doing. I was banded in June of 2008 and I didn't lose any weight for 5 months because the fill nurse I had didn't put in ANY fill (she was later fired). When I finally started getting filled I started losing. I have now lost about 45 lbs. I didn't have too much to lose but I had a lot of health issues due to my weight ( diabetes, blood pressure, cholestrol). I have gone from a size 14 to a size 4 in pants and an extra large to a size small in tops. It will happen as soon as you get enough restriction. Now I struggle with distorted body image. Everyone says I am skinny and I still think I am big. My therapist says to take time looking at myself in the mirror in my underwear. So far that has not worked. Good luck and don't be too hard on yourself.

wow that nurse thing sucks, what was she injecting all that time? if you don't mind me asking. I am hoping the restriction comes soon for me, will get another dosage of saline in a week. Maybe if the doctor had placed a smaller band.

Are you still going through any of the earlier problems you had (diabetes, hypertension, etc)? Think of things this way, we are never fully aware of our size, that is how many of us got to the point we were before surgery. I've been a big kid all my life but I just kept getting bigger and it was never a worry cause I always felt the same (big), until one day I compared a time lapse picture and saw the huge difference. At that point I became more contious of myself I would always assume I could not fit in the trains and even limited my activities cause I thought I would break something with my size. During that time I got even bigger, it was not until the illnesses and pains got to me that I realized I have literally got a to big a problem to handle on my own and pushed myself for this procedure. What I guess I am trying to say is you can never realize your own size until you compare yourself visually with yourself, that works when gaining and when losing the weight. I guess that would be what the doctor is trying to make you do.

I guess we are both experiencing kinda similar problems. I am having issues, because I do not want to be the person I was before surgery. I made a decision that I would completely change and I just cant wait to be that person. You have actually changed but keep seeing yourself as the person you were before; and the person in front of you probably looks/feels like a complete stranger. Just understand that, that person is you. As for distortion, half the fun of breaking down legos is you get to build new things with it, with the added experience of the first thing you built. Wish you luck.

Thanks all for the replies, I think I am feeling a bit better. I can tell this is a common problem and that it has been overcome, so that gives me faith and a bit more patience.