Size pictures and body dysmorphia

[the best me 6]

I have never told anyone that and it actually sounds abnormal saying it outloud, well typing it anyway.

Then we are both abnormal I do the same thing. I think, OMG, am I that fat? I know how much I weigh, she doesn't weigh much more than me, I know she's not more than 220, am I that fat?! I guess I am.

So, does self-loathing create fat? No. Not for me. Like Crystal, it's not about hating myself. But for me, it's not about protection either, so we have different issues there. ((((((((HUGS))))))))) Vinesqueen!!

It's not even about control, I don't think. But then again, I dated that alcoholic guy for almost 4 years and didn't think that was about control. A few AL-Anon meetings taught me otherwise. It's more about creating excuses to get past the lack of self-doubt. I find it a tad too easy to be incredibly hard on myself about the littlest things. Not good enough, smart enough, together enough, motivated enough, just not enough of anything good that I would attempt to strive for. It's excuse-making. THAT is what turns into to vicious eating/fat/eat more/get fatter cycle. I want to eat, I like to eat, it's immediate, satisfying, warm and happy there. Why not create a darn good self-loving excuse to go there to the eating place by convincing myself I'm pitiful? At least in some way pitiful! Isn't that sick? I think that's what it is...at least partly?

Wow, this thread has made a sharp turn down the therapy road! Good stuff people. Keep it coming!

One more hug for you , Crystal ((((((((((((((HUG)))))))))))))))

[glassarttist 0]

I remember weiging 170 pounds in high school and thinking I was enormous! Well I was 5'6" so I wasn't that bad. But feeling fat and thinking I was hopelessly fat only created a feeling of helplessness and I just continued on eating my size up to 330 pounds. Now I look back at 170 and think that is only 20 pounds above my goal weight. Whatever was I thinking back then?

[NJChick 3]

I eat cause I'm miserable and I'm miserable because I eat

[glassarttist 0]

I eat cause I'm miserable and I'm miserable because I eat

That should be in my signature.

[Marimaru 7]

I was 165~170 in Jr. High, and while I knew at the time that wasn't "skinny", and I had my dad to help pound it into my head that I was fat by putting me on slimfast and weighing me every damn day. I think for me, being fat IS my control thing. You can't control what I eat anymore, so HAHA! Not that I did it consiously mind you, but I think that's what it breaks down to. I never snuck out of the house, or did drugs or anything like that, but the hidden candy wrappers in my room told the story of my rebellion.

So while I try not to give too much credit for my problems to other people, I can't help but thank dear old dad for a hand in my body dysmorphia (and that of my 17 year old sister's as well, who was never more than 20 lbs overweight. Fortunately, I've been able to be a picture of what NOT to do for her, and she's a great 130 right now, and workin' hard to keep it that way). My sister was never even "Obese", just "Overweight" but I think she's the person in my family who has the closest idea of what I've gone through, just because she has to watch herself so closely to stay where she is.

[beautifultina 1]

i thought i too was the only one who asks friends and loved ones to comapre me to other large people i see. Most times they will say no you arent THAT big. I think they are just trying to be nice. I would like to see a software program where you could input your picture with your height and weight and it could show you a picture of yourself at your goal weight. THAT would be something that would TRUELY motivate me.

I have to also confess that when I see large women that I will say awful things (never outloud mind you) like: my god if i ever get that fat i would just be too embarrassed to leave the house or you would think that she was too fat to fit down the isle of a grocery store or maybe she has a frequent flyer progam at Mc Donald's. then i look down and see that i too am as big if not bigger than the person i am putting down in my head and realize that i need to grow up and shut up!!

thank you for the therapy here. i need to realize that at least they are out there trying and making a difference in thier lives. like i said i need to grow up as far as my self image is concerned.

[beautifultina 1]

i truely feel awful for my confession about thinking bad things about other large people and i want to apologize to anyone who found it to be offensive.

[the best me 6]

In a way, I don't see this is too unlike getting a new car and then noticing just how many there seem to be on the hiways that you never noticed before....

Heh! Excellent analogy.

I think this is why it's good to post size pics. It's hard to think bad thoughts about people you care about, but it's good, too, to realize what size 50 hips look like on different people. I think this is great therapy. Who's going first? I'll post my pics and stats...let me get it together.

[Marimaru 7]

Tina, I used to do that same thing. That was back when I was in MAJOR DENIAL about my own size to begin with. In my mind, my body never got bigger than a size 14, even though I was in 18's, then 22's, then 24's... Finally it hit me that I was FAT, and a number of the people I'd had those thoughts about were SMALLER than ME!! Holy crap was that a kick in the head.

So now, I see myself as my 24 self even though I'm a 16, and I can't get that staightened out right. I'll see someone and say to myself "Gee I wish I was that small" and then on some more careful consideration see that I might just be that size, or at least close to it.

I've only got a couple of full body shots at this point to post, but I'll be happy to do it. How much detail do we want to include? I'm asking this (sorry Jack), because I'm thinking that for the ladies, that waist size is also going to look different dependant on breast size, etc... you know?

[the best me 6]

How much detail do we want to include? I'm asking this (sorry Jack), because I'm thinking that for the ladies, that waist size is also going to look different dependant on breast size, etc... you know?

I'm taking my After pic for the Summer Weight Loss Challenge on Monday. I'll post that one here. I also have my measurements from a few weeks back. I measured arms, bust, bra band, waist, abs, hips, thighs, calves. I'll post them all with my pic. I say, post what youv'e got and feel comfortable with. I won't do a nakey shot (whew! says the whole bunch of you!) but I will wear a tank top and shorts, knees up is how the last one turned out.

btw, Sarah, I replied to your PM for 25 min. and lost it...it never posted, augghhh!! so I'll rewrite and resend asap. Later tonight.

[LilAngel 0]

I would like to see a software program where you could input your picture with your height and weight and it could show you a picture of yourself at your goal weight. THAT would be something that would TRUELY motivate me.

I have seen this once or twice in certain threads. I wish there was too. In the meantime I use myvirtualmodel.com. It doesn't really look just like me, but it helps. It is supposed to be for shopping purposes, but there is no way in this world I would buy something with out trying it on. Not with these hips! lol. Maybe it works for some though. Have fun!

[vinesqueen 2]

I've bumped the thread "I hate fat people" in this forum

[glassarttist 0]

I have seen this once or twice in certain threads. I wish there was too. In the meantime I use myvirtualmodel.com. It doesn't really look just like me, but it helps. It is supposed to be for shopping purposes, but there is no way in this world I would buy something with out trying it on. Not with these hips! lol. Maybe it works for some though. Have fun!

Well I wasn't too pleased with this when I tried it at Sears. How discriminatory is this?

That was after I had created it at the main site, so I know it works. Apparently Sears doesn't think fat short people exist.

[vinesqueen 2]

That's because short fat people are invisible. Weren't you paying attention?

[LilAngel 0]

I know!!!! I just realized this after I posted today and decided to go play with my "model." I kept blowing me up because that stinking model is too thin no matter what size I put in and eventually I blew myself up! Suddenly Sears erradicated my "model" existence. I guess I usually just used it to pretend I was thin. Never really wanted to see the real me. I guess Sears doesn't either. What crap! Okay. I'm done.