male only girl knocking on the door, please!

[Snowgator 3]

guys,

excuse the intrusion. Need male advice here. have had 2 dates recently with a nice guy my age. Last one was Sat. I would like to ask him to happy hour tomorrow. Is this ok, or do I need to wait for him to ask me out on what would be our 3rd date. (We are both in our 40's)

thanks!

p.s. not looking for a freebie here, on the last date he paid for dinner, but I paid for a bottle of wine at bar we went to after

Edited March 31, 2009 by Snowgator

[plain 12]

I think that'd be fine. Casual happy hour with drinks and apps 3 days since last date........why not?

[Jaffa 5]

It is always ok to ask a man out. With a man, many times if he say's he can't because of this or that, he isn't making an excuse, but more likely really doing this or that. Men and Women tend to be very different this way.

[BDS_Geologist 0]

Go ahead and invite him to join you for a happy hour. The casual "un-date-like" atmosphere really helps and inviting him out gives him some feedback on your feelings.

It's definitely not too forward to ask a man out for a happy hour.

Bryan

[PNWal 0]

It is always ok to ask a man out. With a man, many times if he say's he can't because of this or that, he isn't making an excuse, but more likely really doing this or that. Men and Women tend to be very different this way.

Amen! We are simple creatures, if we like you and are available that night we say yes. No thoughts of "what it means"

Go for it - have fun!

[ElusiveQuality 22]

I would like to ask him to happy hour tomorrow. Is this ok, or do I need to wait for him to ask me out on what would be our 3rd date. (We are both in our 40's)

Not sure what age has to do with it but asking is fine.

Have fun.

[dare301obx 0]

I agree... ask away...

afterall... some of us are not all that comfortable either; you asking sends a message that you're interested... as he probably is too.

[Cingulus 0]

Yes, It is always nice to be asked out.

[Snowgator 3]

Thanks for the advice, guys.

I did ask, and he said he wished he could, but he had his bowling league on Tuesday nights. And I think this is probably true, since he had mentioned before that he was in a league.

So, I figure ball is now in his court. We'll see if he calls to ask me out again.

[plain 12]

It is always ok to ask a man out.

Well....yes and no. It would be different (IMO) if the last date was extremely recent (I mean like, asking him to happy hour while still out on a date, LOL). Maybe it's just me, but too pushy can sometimes feel "desperate".

[Renob 1]

It is always ok to ask a man out.

What he said!!!!

[Snowgator 3]

Ah well, thought you fellows would like an update. Mr. X never did call me again. He did send a text last week to say "hi, wish I could call, but it's late and I've been so busy". I responded with a text, but nothing further from him.

Have had a first date with Mr. Y. He is not nearly such a pretty boy as Mr. X, but since the date has already called, sent an ecard, and asked me out for date #2. So, am looking forward to that 2nd date instead.

Thanks again mens room guys!

[Jaffa 5]

My wife was pushy after our first date. Frankly, I was so busy and so self absorbed about my career, she had to be this way.

If it wasn't for her pushing we would never had continued dating. She did the right thing. I'm not saying it will always turn out this way, but you never know.

To me, there is no difference between seeming desperate and being desperate. I just believe we all live quiet lives of constant deperation anyway. Anyone who doesn't acknowledge this is just pretending in my opinion, so it means nothing to me.

[RMG88 0]

For whatever it's worth, it is unlikely that your asking him out had anything to do with his further show of interest. He either liked you or he didn't.