Fun Thread for the Bored

[DeLarla 22]

***cracking up here***

Jenna WAS talking about my MONSTER husband! He's got 3 bulging disc that have turned him into a complete A-hole! I'm not even apologizing for him any more. I could leave him, but he gives good _ _ _ _.

OKAY, NOW I'M CHOKING AND DYING LAUGHING FER REAL!

[DeLarla 22]

I've hadbad experiences with public Laundromats. The day I met my husband, he asked what I wanted out of life and the first thing out of my mouth was, "MY OWN WASHER AND DRYER."

I've always been up before the chickens, so another time when I was much younger I walked into my apartment's laundry room before daybreak. I flipped on the light, and there was a witch with a long, green pointy finger reaching at me to eat my brains! Okay, fine, she was really just a bag lady sleeping in our laundry room asking me for some money, but she scared the living crap out of me so I ran like hell!

I'm not afraid of the bag lady (will prolly be one myself some day) but when you don't expect something like that before you've even sipped some caffeine, it could really screw up a kid's head!

[princess_n_thep 2]

Sounds like what might happen if you were to go to Vegas and meet DeLarla?

AHHHHahahahahahaha!!!!

Yeah, but her hubby is a hottie, I'll bet he's not REALLY scary?

LMAO LMAO LMAO LMAO

I am going to make him make me a strawberry daquiri and rub my feet next time. Okay, so he may not rub my feet but I will get that damn drink!!! I think Vooey would lick them if I brought more toys!

[rachel 0]

I still don't think I've recovered from "The Blair Witch Project" - but I watch it every now and then, just to make sure.

Rachel.

[porclndoll 0]

I live in a very wooded part of New York. My friend and I desided to go see Blair Witch Project together...yea very creepy movie. When the movie let out, it was close to midnight...the roads were pitch black...trees lined the street I was driving on...it was a summer night. My windows were down and the radio was on. As Im driving (I drive a Windstar Minivan) I see something flash in the back seat behind me!! OH MY GOD SOMEONES IN THE CAR WITH ME...So I look and look, cant find anything or anyone. Phew, just my imagination. About two minutes later I see it again! HOLY CRAP WHATS BACK THERE... This time I phsyically turn around and look....Nothing. No one in the back back....all is good...but what do I keep seeing??? Just my imagination....A few minutes later I SEE IT AGAIN! All right, now all bets are off! My blood is pumpin...Im scared....Thankfully I just peed before I left the theater.... I pull my van off into a store parking lot...now Im hitting civilization...and I search my car ...NOTHING!! I get back in the car and start on my way...and I see it again, but this time I CATCH IT! It was my hair!!!! I had really long hair at the time and I was wearing it in a pony tail. The wind from the windows being open was whipping it around in circles behind my head and I was seeing it in the rear view mirror!! muuuaaahahahahahahahahah KILLER HAIR OH MY!!!

[Road Queen 0]

Okay, I get nervous about everything. Here's a few of my recent ones:

Waking up on the chicken bus in Ecuador to realize there were no other passengers on board. The next couple of guys that got on were carrying machetes (to cut grass) - mental images of cutting me.

Riding motorcycle from Salt Lake City to Reno alone and seeing all the signs about the prisons - if you hear gun fire call 911, don't pick up hitchhikers, etc - then having to stop in the middle of the road for construction.

Honduras 2003 weed green Beans and almost grabbing a tarantula (one of my loudest girl screams ever). going to the prison to church and finding out the guards are on the outside and I am on the inside with 700 prisoners. oh, and did I mention that the women guards that check you over before you go in were attracted to my thick calves (a sign of sexuality or something there)

Opening up my bed in Liberia Africa and finding mouse terds all over in it! Yikes.

I know these don't qualify as full fledged scarey but they work for me. Celeste

[Marimaru 7]

Most recently was when my boyfriend scared me while I was in the shower. I was just rinsing my hair, so I had my eyes closed, and just as I finished he banged on the door and said "oogy boogy boogy!!!!" Yup, I screamed. And then I got him all wet.

[chichigirl 1]

Okay, this sounds like some of the others, but I swear it really happened. A while back when I was still married, we lived in Miami, Florida. My husband was working for a large firm and they called him out of town to do a job up in Jacksonville. I hated that he had to go and they said it would be at least two weeks for him to be up there. At that time I was the biggest baby that ever was, I was terrified of sleeping in the dark, let alone in an empty house. I had asked a girl friend to stay over, but she wouldn't, she thought I was just being silly. I mean so what if I was 32 years old, I can be scared. Anyway, because the house did not have central air conditioning there were window units in all of the rooms. At night we would turn the one in the living room off and just turn on the one in the bedroom and close the door. So here I am, finally going to bed at around 2 or 3 AM in my dark bedroom with the door closed. But I was so tired and was just falling asleep when all of a sudden BANG - BANG- BANG, there was someone outside banging on the side bedroom window. I though I would have a heart attack. I grabbed my phone and called my girlfriend, who was actually a little ticked with me waking her up. She said, "Why are you calling me, call the cops," so I hung up and did just that.

The dispatcher told me they were sending someone right away and for me to stay on the phone with her. She let me know when the police were at my address and let me know that they were walking around the house, but for me to stay where I was. I could here them walking around and I saw the flashlights. I was breathing so hard, you would have thought I was an obscene caller! Well after a few minutes the dispatcher told me to go to the front door, the officers were out there and needed to talk to me. I was really petrified, but did as she told me. I cracked the door just slightly to make sure that it was really the police. They called out my name and told me to open the door wider, so I did, which at that point they put their flashlights in the face of this man they had in handcuffs. They wanted to know if I recognized him, I took a look and of course it was my stupid husband. He made me so mad that at first I told the police officers that I had never seen him before in my life! Boy that scared the crap out him!!!! Finally I just started yelling at him about why didn't he let me know he was coming home and he just said he wanted to surprise me. I said well I guess we both got surprised. So the officers took off the handcuffs and when he came inside, I really let him have it. I was still shaking from the whole thing. I get shakey just thinking about, that was my biggest fright ever.

Cindy

[j.s. 0]

I like this thread. Ok heres mine:

About a million years ago, when I was a sweet young thing, all of 19, I lived at my brothers house. I had to sleep on a couch in the living room. Next to that room was a dining room that also had a couch and one of my brother's roomates slept on that couch. They all worked first shift and I worked 2nd shift so I would be up late at night watching tv - with the lights off, not to disturb the sleeper in the dining room. Well it would be late and I would hear this high pitched squeaking noise that sounded like it was coming from the kitchen where the back door was. This was an old house and had a creepy basement leading off in the kitchen also. Well I would hear this noise and go into the kitchen walking through the dining room and then the noise would stop. After about an hour of this, I would go lock the back door and the door that led from the basement to the kitchen, lock that one too. This happened like 4 nights in a row. I would be freaking. My brother finally comes home one day all pissed off saying "why do you keep on locking that back door and shutting that other door locking that one too?" (this irritated him, he had an open door policy that was well known and he felt I was comprimising that policy). So I tell him I am hearing these creepy noises coming from the basement. At this time I had totally decided it must be a rat or something else equally as icky coming up from the basement and it was not gonna be getting me! I explained the noises I heard every night - my brother says, thats not rats, thats Rick! Turns out they were the guy sleeping in the dining room - he ground his teeth while he slept! I never in a million years would have thought that was what grinding teeth sounded like. Turns out I married that guy. p.s. He stopped that teeth grinding too!

[porclndoll 0]

Okay, Im bringing this back cause I gotta new story!

We are 3 weeks away from Opening night at the haunted house that I work at. We are ONE week from inspection! There are a million things to do to be ready. So, a bunch of us meet up there last night to paint and fix and decorate...My job was to paint the back side of one of the attractions. OK IEY IEY!! So off I go with my paint bucket and rollers and big high reachin stick. I was on a roll....Got half of the high stuff done...and I look down..DAMMIT A SNAKE...I took off running ~ screaming for anyone to come and save me. No one would come. All the guys up there "oh no, cant busy...oh umm lemme just finish"...SCAREY CATS THEMSELVES. So one girl comes back with me, she was gonna shoo it away...so we were standing there getting closer, and her brother (the owner of this place, and a very good friend to me) heard what was going on and came to save us. He carried a big stick....I jumped into a trailor that was there to observe the slaying...Hes bashing the hell outta this snake, then picks it up with the big stick and starts coming my way! Oh my gosh WHAT THE HELL is he doing....he is chasing me with the dead snake!!! I ran like the DEVIL himself was chasing me! I ran the entier length of the property within 2.3 seconds!!!!! Why is he doing this to me, hes afraid of snakes too....wait a minute......the snake fell off the bored PHEW A chance for me to catch my breath...Women my size should NOT be running like this!! What? Hes bending down to pick it up...NOOO HE WOULD NEVER....freekin snake was fake! He planted it back there and planned the WHOLE thing! THIS MAN IS PURE EVIL!!! He will be repaid~~~

Later this same night...he and I went thru this one attraction together. OH MY GOSH lemme just say...and this is the honest to goodness truth....I have never been so scared up there before in my life! I was screaming at the top of my lungs! I have NEVER been scared to that point by any of our attractions before!!!! And this is my fourth year doing this!! Customers are going to go NUTS over this one attraction! CANT WAIT CANT WAIT CANT WAIT!!!!!!!