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Rude and Inconsiderate



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I think as a fat person I've learned to let these remarks trickle off of me like Water on a duck. I don't let them get under my feathers. Most people are well-intentioned, but either misinformed or lack the skills to deliver the message in a way that is not offensive. So, I always try to look at intention.

Now, as a funny side-note, I remember being REALLY offended at my former PCP because when I went in to see him after losing 40 pounds on WW (and told him I had 30 more to get to my goal weight), he told he didn't know ANYONE who ever took that much off or kept it off without bariatric surgery. I felt like he was telling me my efforts were futile and it made me mad. I ranted about him to everyone I knew, but it turned out he was right. So, I just have to laugh about that a bit now. Ironically, I may have a fight w/insurance now because my BMI went below 35 during this huge effort on WW and now I've gained it all back plus 20. Ugh!

Hindsite is 20/20, though. I was just soooo not ready to consider bariatric surgery at that point so he was in a lose/lose situation no matter what he said. I think this is why so many doctors just keep their mouth shut when it comes to weight even though I'm not sure if that's for the best either...

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What I find ironic is that on this very forum there's entire threads devoted to people complaining about the lighter people getting the surgery. Many obese people are very jealous of anyone thinner than them getting a lap band and are very free with their opinions about how those of us who started with BMI's of 35 or less should just diet and lose weight that way. All the while of course forgetting that they had a BMI of 35 once even if it was only for five minutes and they were no more successful at losing it then than they are now.

Anyone who has the means, the opportunity and the desire to get the surgery should be able to. There is no real cut off point at which you're too thin - many people struggle mightily to maintain normal bodyweights but inside are every bit as sick and enslaved to their weight as people who have lost the actual scale battle. I can see reasons why someone with a BMI of 25 should be able to be banded depending upon the case.

I just think its nobody's business but yours, dont listen to anyone, you know what you want and need.

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i/m asking everyone on this blog, if they had a choice would they do it again,???i am going for my second meeting in 2 weeks ? just looking for some input

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i/m asking everyone on this blog, if they had a choice would they do it again,???i am going for my second meeting in 2 weeks ? just looking for some input

I would do it again in a heart beat! I love my band!!!

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i/m asking everyone on this blog, if they had a choice would they do it again,???i am going for my second meeting in 2 weeks ? just looking for some input

I am very glad to have my band! It's now my best friend! But, do a forum search and you will see several threads devoted to exactly that topic...would you do it again?!

Read everything you can find, then ask alot of questions.

I have had only one person say "you don't look that big...you didn't need surgery". Of course, this was AFTER I'd lost the first 25 lbs. I told her I don't look that big because it's WORKING!!! :tt1:

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I have to second you on this one....

I have had a number of ppl tell me that I don't look like I "need" surgery or when I tell them I'm having a band they say "for what you look great."

I take care of myself and try to make the best of what I have. I'm extremely fortunet that I have always carried my weight really well. I even have a friend who's seen me butt naked and told me she thought I was almost 50 lbs less then what I really am!!

It's FAR LESS about how I LOOK...this is all about how I FEEL...and I'm sick and tired of being 34 y/o and feeling like a 64y/o, every joint from the waist down hurts constantly and it's time to do something about it...that's just the bottom line for me!!

But I have to admit, it does amaze me how stupid and rude some ppl can be. I once had an obgyn tell me "you would be really pretty if you lost some weight" needless to say he didn't remain my obgyn!!!

Hold your head up high, you don't have to explain nor defend yourself to anyone.

that is SO how i feel. looking better is a definate perk but I can't wait to get into bed at night and my hips not ache. my lower back to not be screaming. to not have to toss and turn because my arm fell asleep from sleeping on my side. Ohhhh those are the things i am most looking forward to!

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i/m asking everyone on this blog, if they had a choice would they do it again,???i am going for my second meeting in 2 weeks ? just looking for some input

I would do it again in a heartbeat! :tt1:

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EVERYONE! This message is for everyone who has experienced less-than-perfectly-courteous treatment by healthcare people...especially those involved in these weight loss procedures:

Tell someone how you were treated! You are doing the medical practice a favor! This is a big-money specialty that should treat you like they do in the Mercedes dealership. If you dont complain they will lose businees and money...they WANT to know that you are happy there! And they WANT to know if there is anything they could improve. You are doing the practice and all subsequent patients a big favor! Cali

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Good for you. You and I would get along well. The naturally skinny people and some others just don't get it. "Have you tried to loose weight" are you kidding.

Linda

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