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BIG Embarassing Moments - Fuel for Success



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I was fortunate enough to be spared being a heavy child, but my mother was very large when I was a kid. She would always tell me about all the plans she had for when she lost weight, what she would do and who she would go see. I could never understand why she would wait to live until she was thin (which only came in her 40s and via a self-destructive route). When I started to gain as an adult, I remembered what my mom had been through and knew I would never let the weight make me feel like a bad person. It has, however, shown me what bad people other can sometimes be. :thumbup:

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So I was on the phone with my best friend the other day (who is incredibly super skinny, even after two kids), and my daughter (4 1/2) walks in and says, "Mom, why aren't you skinny..." me:"Shhhhh", Daughter: "Why aren't you skinny?, huh mom? Why are you not skinny?" I wanted to DIE of embarrassement and shame! I Know she doesn't mean any harm by saying that, she is just curious, but I was so hurt and so sad, and I just KNOW my super skinny georgeous friend heard it all!

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So I was on the phone with my best friend the other day (who is incredibly super skinny, even after two kids), and my daughter (4 1/2) walks in and says, "Mom, why aren't you skinny..." me:"Shhhhh", Daughter: "Why aren't you skinny?, huh mom? Why are you not skinny?" I wanted to DIE of embarrassement and shame! I Know she doesn't mean any harm by saying that, she is just curious, but I was so hurt and so sad, and I just KNOW my super skinny georgeous friend heard it all!

I can totally relate to both of your points. My best friend is 6 months pregnant and was bemoaning how "fat" she is at 135 pounds. Meanwhile my 2 year old is pounding my belly going "fat belly for mama".

:thumbup:

Yeah, this damn band can't come soon enough! Hang in there...and just think, your daughter wouldn't trade her chubby mama for the world!!!

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Anouther horse story..... I went horse back rideing years ago and they had to bring "Buck" the biggest horse they had too! I went back the following year and he asked when we were checking in if anyone had been there previous. I said "yes" and he said "oh, you must have rode Buck"! I was a lil embarrassed thinking how does he know I was over weight the previous year? Sad part was that was not even close to my heaviest weight.

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So I was on the phone with my best friend the other day (who is incredibly super skinny, even after two kids), and my daughter (4 1/2) walks in and says, "Mom, why aren't you skinny..." me:"Shhhhh", Daughter: "Why aren't you skinny?, huh mom? Why are you not skinny?" I wanted to DIE of embarrassement and shame! I Know she doesn't mean any harm by saying that, she is just curious, but I was so hurt and so sad, and I just KNOW my super skinny georgeous friend heard it all!

Reminds me of the time I was walking with my nephew (who was 5yrs at the time) to the park. He looked up at me and asks, "Aunt T..are you fat?" He had such a serious/worried look on his face that I almost cried. I told him the truth and said "Yeah..I'm bigger then I should be." My other embarrassing moment was when I was a senior in high school and we had an "underground" newspaper (you know the kind...rips into, gossips and insults people) Me and this young man were voted "MOST RESEMBLES A WEEBLE". I laughed it off but it sooooo hurt that it still pops into my head now and again when a pair of pants or top doesn't look right on me ( I have a short waist and long legs)....but now that I'm banded and on the right track!! :w00t: I just wish I would've done this 10 or 15yrs ago!!

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What makes people think it's ok to be such bastards? I have friends who thought they knew what it's like because they were teased about freckles, braces, etc. As if that is even close to the degradation of self-worth caused by the everyday cruelties an overweight person faces.

One of my earliest humilations as a chubby child was when new neighbors moved in, and I wandered over to their yard and was tickled that the kids invited me to play. Within minutes, their Dad came dashing out to tell me that I was too heavy for the swingset, and he'd rather I didn't use it.

Junior High was one horrific day after another. It hurt me that the few close friends I had were making new friends who all seemed to wrinkle their cute little noses at me. It didn't help when teachers ignored and tolerated cruel remarks. Once a teacher asked for an example of a barren wasteland and one of the popular boys pretended to raise his hand and said "Susan G?" That got some loud hoots of appreciation, and a sigh of exasperation from the teacher, who simply said something like "ok Sam, that's enough".

Our "tough guy" vice-principal was a glorified hall monitor, and made everybody walk single-file to the cafateria at lunchtime. He called me "big girl" and though he had several other favorites to *tease* he seemed to go out of his way to single me out. I tried so hard to never catch his eye, just cringing inside waiting for him to say "what's the rush big girl? Afraid they are going to run out of fries?"

Others have mentioned the horror of the annual "weigh-in" at gym class. In 7th grade our names were called as we sat in the bleachers, and yes, our weights were called out to the assistant doing the recording. I played sick for several days the next year hoping to be absent on weight day, but mis-timed it. I remember inadvertantly catching the eye of the gym teacher as she weighed me, and she must have read it in my face and took pity on me. She walked over and whispered the bad news to her helper. I still had several people snickering as I went to sit back down "how much??" Can't win! lol

Despite the self-loathing, I think there is one positive that came from these and many similar incidents. I think it made me a kinder and more understanding person in my own interactions with others over the years.

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