My Mother Is Driving Me NUTS!!!

[derbin247 0]

Help! My mother is driving me nuts. I was going to bring her to my last appt with the surgeon but I cant trust her to keep her mouth shut and to be positive. I told her she can only come if she is positive support so she said well she will REALLY need to prep for that...and so I told her dont even come. So frustrating. She embarressed me at the seminar back in October. Now she wants to go to the Mandatory Pre Operative Question class. Its a group class and my boyfriend will be there too for support. I hope she can control herself..

anyone else have this problem?

[lucyavery 0]

Well, do you think it is negativity because she does not want you to get the band? Or maybe she is nervous and scared about her little girl going through such a serious procedure?

Or, is that just her personalitly? It's obvious that she cares about you, or she would not want to go.

[maestrita 43]

My mother is the same way! I don't know what her problem is, but I told her that she did not need to come with me on the surgery date because I could only have one visitor, and my husband wanted to be there. It was a total lie, but I just can't deal with her negativity. Thank goodness I am going out of town for the procedure! She would be so hurt if she knew my mother-in-law is going to fly in for the procedure, but I just can't deal with her.

I hate to say this, but I think she is jealous in some way. I know, I know. It's a horrible thing to think about your mother, but I don't know what else might be causing her to be so nasty. I know what concern looks like with my mother, and this is not it. It is pure negativity. Yikes. I hope you get your situation figured out.:thumbup:

[crzytchr 3]

Honestly, I have kids and I would probably be asking so many questions and embarrass my children too, just because I worry about them.

My mom didn't embarrass me, but I didn't want her at the hospital because she makes me nervous in situations like that. I ended up letting her go, because she really wanted to be there.

Talk to your mom and try to figure out why she is being negative. Is she afraid of the surgery? Does SHE think you don't really need it? Find out what is going on, if you can.

[derbin247 0]

I think in a way my mother is jealous also. We are both overweight and have done weight watchers together. she lost 20 and then gained it all back... i lost 60... i think she is concerned also that her daughter is having a surgery... and also she is just negative. she is never happy about anything that i do unless she can brag to someone about it. when i got my AA she was SO HAPPY! but anything else that is good i dont even want to share it with her because she always answers with pursed lips and eyebrows raised and a shrug.

i am glad that i got the courage to tell her not to come to my last appt and i wish i could tell her not to go to surgery but there is no way. well i am glad i am not alone in this!

[TQUAD64 9]

Help! My Now she wants to go to the Mandatory Pre Operative Question class. Its a group class and my boyfriend will be there too for support. I hope she can control herself..

anyone else have this problem?

Too funny. My daughter will be 24 shortly and I still have difficulty cutting the cord. I love her with all my heart and want to make sure she receives the very best in life, which I am sure your mom wants for you.

Moms are moms. We have our mom issues and we know we can be pesty, but we love an adore our adult children and really want the best for them. Try and be patient with your mom.

By the way, I am going to be 45 shortly and my mom gets on my nerves and business too. So it never ends.:thumbup:

Good luck!

[derbin247 0]

Ha lol ya thanks... I need to remember that she is my mom... how would I feel if my daughter was going in for surgery. (My daughter is 3 though).

[TQUAD64 9]

Ha lol ya thanks... I need to remember that she is my mom... how would I feel if my daughter was going in for surgery. (My daughter is 3 though).

Yep, 3 today and 26 before you know it and always-always your baby.

Best regards!

[derbin247 0]

where in cali do you live?

[TQUAD64 9]

where in cali do you live?

San Joaquin County in Northern Cali.

[derbin247 0]

oh ok cool... you are happy with your lap band?

[TQUAD64 9]

oh ok cool... you are happy with your lap band?

Yes, I will send you a private message.

[IWannaBeSkinny 0]

San Joaquin County in Northern Cali.

Me too! We must be pretty close. Do you go to a support group locally? Where was your surgery done?

[JillBengt 0]

Derbin247,

I am in Camarillo, California. Just curious which surgeon you are using. I used Dr. Billy. Three-weeks post-op.

[derbin247 0]

Jill! I got goosebumps just now! Yes I am using Dr. Billy too! I will be at the mandatory pre op class on wednesday night, i have my last pre op appt with Dr. Billy on the 12th and then on the 25th I will be banded. How did it go for you? Tell me everything :tongue:

P.S. I am SO happy to meet someone near me on here who has gone to Dr. Billy!!!