Scared and Wondering if I should do it... help?

[lingling 0]

Hi everyone

I'm 28 (nearly 29) and have been overweight my WHOLE life, from like 2 years old. I am debating the banding. I have tried weight watchers, dieting, personal trainers, I currently gym 3-4x per week. I am trying really hard to cut down on the wine as I am sure that doesn't help either! I am really starting to consider having a band done. I went to see a guy about it a year ago - and learned a bit. I read some forums and I was disheartened about the "quality of life" or what I perceived to be the "quality of life". Things like PBs, not drinking champagne or beer, and people knowing really put me off, and I decided to give weightwatchers another go for a year - convinced I hadn't tried hard enough. Well, my weight is creeping up - now at nearly 300pd. When I was 20 I was 220 and its yoyo'd and crept up since then.

What I want to know is the REAL Truth. Is it worth it? I am worried I am being lazy and that I really could do this if I hardened up and got off my ass and just stuck to weight watchers to the T. Although the surgeon told me 2% of people lose considerable weight without surgery and keep it off. I don't want to be 40 and single and wishing I'd got the band and enjoyed my life skinny because I wasn't gonna get there by myself. But I am scared that I will feel like crap every day and never be able to eat anything but mashed potatoes and keep doing PBs and that it wont be worth it?

Mainly, I am scared I will die in the surgery. I don't have any associated health problems (yet) but I am paronoid that I will die on the table - therefore this risk + ??? feeling like crap and eating only mashed potatoes - outweight the possiblity that I MAY BE ABLE TO DO IT WITHOUT HELP!!!???

Help!

:wink2:

[laurr925 0]

Well I haven't had the band yet, my surgery is scheduled for two weeks from now, but I can tell you the things that helped me make my decision.

First, I am 22 years old, I have been overweight for a good portion of my life, even though I was skinny as a kid. After years of trying countless dieting methods and yoyo'ing all over the place, I decided to start looking into the lap-band.

I have a few friends who have all had the surgery, and they have been a great source of help. You don't eat just mashed potatoes, I can promise you. I've seen them eat pizza, hamburgers, Pasta, chicken wings, etc etc. but they eat much slower and much less than I do. They come out to the bar with me (usually they drink wine or vodka), we go out to dinner, and nothing much has changed other than their eating habits. They are much happier people since they got the band because they fit into normal clothes, they have more energy, and they feel good about themselves.

The lap-band isn't a miracle tool, it takes hard work. I am on day two of my pre-op diet and it isn't fun, but I'm excited to be moving on with my life.

As far as your fear of dying during surgery, I understand how surgery is scary. I am fully confident in my surgeons ability and experience, and I know I am going to be fine. There are risks with surgery, but if you find a surgeon you are comfortable with, I'm sure you will be less nervous.

I really hope you take the time out to speak to some more people who have had the band, they could probably help you more than I can.

Good luck with everything! :wink2:

Edited January 21, 2009 by laurr925

[a2bachik 0]

Let me just say... I had my band done in Sept 08, and I love it. I really wasn't sure about it at first and after the surgery it was really hard. I didn't know if I had made the right decission. The surgery is surgery, there are risks with everything we do in life. I was lucky to have my surgery in the hospital I work in and I knew all of the people that were working on me. Also, I trusted my doctor. The key is to find a doctor that you can trust and that you believe in.

Don't go into it with any questions. Ask as many as you can think of. This website is a great place to get the answers you are looking for. There are a ton of people that have been in the same place you are in right now, there are even people here that are in the same place.

As far as the food, yes there is some limitations on certain things you can eat at first. But, that's just because you have to give your body time to heal and get used to the band. It really forces you to listen to your body and to learn new things about yourself.

I am currently down 57lbs and I feel like a new person. I can't wait to see what the rest of this year is going to bring me.

Good luck on your decision. You are the only one that can make this choice for yourself.

[edel 0]

I felt the same way when i was trying to decide if it was for me. I thought there is no way im having it done if i have no proper life after. I enjoy my drinks - i drink tia maria and diet coke - and i still do every weekend. But i have to say it does slow down the weight loss, but most weeks i lose 1-2 lbs. My sil had the band the same time as me she is a Budweiser girl - and she still is.

As for the mash foods that is required after the band is fitted and after each fill. But they recommend staying away from food like that cause it goes though too easily.

You need will power to stop eating slider foods - my big thing is crisps, they go down too easily.

I have had Pbing, mostly my own fault.

With everything i would NOT change a thing, ok i wouldn't like to go through the procedure again, but this is the best thing i have done for my self and even though im way off my goal i know il get there and my confidence has scored.:tongue:

[Tinakins 0]

Thank you for your post. I am trying to make my decision and I feel the exact same way. I am almost 28 and have been overweight my entire life. I had significant weight loss a couple years ago (70lbs) thinking the same way you did that I should be able to do this on my own. But in the past few months I have been seeing the weight coming back on rapidly. I live in Canada so the surgery is self-pay at $16,000. I don't want to regret spending the money on something that isn't going to work. I worry that as a business the doctors promise you something that isn't as rosey as they make it seem or wont work and you'll just gain it back. I too love champagne :thumbdown: and worry that I'll miss it. But I think I'm at the point now that I realize I am so unhappy at my current weight and nothing else has worked. I just have to realize that this too will require committment and sacrifice. Good luck to you!

[ValJean 6]

lingling— I swear, I could have written your post almost verbatim 10 months ago! I am 29 (30 in a month) and am being banded next week. It took me nearly a year to commit to the decision to make this huge life change—I've gone through (and am still going through) so many different emotions about it, and that horrible fear of dying during surgery has been #1! Part of it is certainly the fact that I am wired for anxiety, but I've come to understand that part of it is a deeper fear of changing, and of who I'll be once I've rid myself of the excuses and limitations that have plagued me my whole life because of my weight.

What will come after the banding remains to be seen. I'm sure everyone's experience is a little bit different. But this forum is such a great place for information and support, and really helped me to decide that this procedure was the right decision for me.

Also, though it was one of the hardest things I had to do, I highly, highly recommend choosing a trusted friend or family member that you can tell about this, and who can ask questions without judging, and help you think it through. I'm not sure if I could be doing this without the support of a few wonderful people who are very close to me, know me well, and have my best interests at heart. It's made me feel proud and confident about my choice, rather than being ashamed that I can't "do it on my own." It's also forced me to be really honest, maybe for the first time in my life, with the people I love about my struggle with my weight and how it affects me daily. It has strengthened those relationships for sure.

Also, when I was going through my pre op pysch evaluation a couple months ago, the therapist suggested I try out OA (Overeaters Anonymous), and I have to say that it has been so helpful to me, just to be around other people who I can share my struggle with. Being able to go to a meeting when I'm feeling stressed/upset (the times when I used to always pig out to soothe myself), has kept me from going on a binge. I think the program is a great tool, one I intend to use, along with the lap band, to accomplish my goals of not only losing weight, but letting go of the sadness, fear, and negative thoughts about my body and finally feeling happy in my own skin.

Sorry to ramble--your story was just so familiar to my own, I really wanted to let you know that you're not alone! I'd be happy to chat with you in the coming weeks after my surgery and let you know how its going and what my experience is. So feel free to send me a message if you want, and I can give you my e-mail address.

Good luck, whatever your decision may be.

Valerie

[kpdgal 0]

I am 40yrs old and am too nervous about what i would have to give up with the lapband. I am due to have surgery in april. This website is priceless and full of wonderful info. I mostly read what people are eating post op and gauge if I can deal with it.. Basically if you are like me, your whole life has been giving up one thing or another, whether its no carbs on Atkins, or not being able to ride the rollercoaster with my son.. I am willing to give up food for adventure hands down. As for the surgery and the fear of dying, just put your trust in god. He will see you through!