I'm Mad as Heck...!

[MaryBnSC 0]

Hi Folks,

It's been a while since I was here. Not sure why, but for what it's worth, I've determined that I definitely need the comradery (sp??), encouragement, feedback and accountablilty of a discussion/support group.

Here is the Readers' Digest Condensed Version of my story: Had my surgery on October 7th. Had my first fill on Dec 6th. At the time of my first fill, hadn't lost much. Got the lecture about what i should be eating, yadayada. Never mind the fact that I was feeling NO restriction. After I left, I realized he was really pushing Adkins - I don't like Adkins. Anyway, the holidays hit and I got busy. And to tell you the truth, I got rebellious! I was mad at this stupid band that wasn't working the way they told me it was going to work!

The closer I got to my 2nd fill date (today), the madder I got. By the time I got to the office today, I was ready to let loose on someone. Got on the scale and gained 4 lbs! Great! Isn't it productive when we rebel? Only hurts ourselves! Anyway - get in the room with the PA - poor James. I pretty much laid into him (obviously explaining that I wasn't mad at him - but I was mad, all the same). I explained that I might not have done what I should have done, but they needed to understand that the little device I'd paid dearly for wasn't doing its' job. I told him I felt like I'd been sold a $40,000 bill of goods that wasn't delivering as promised! If I wanted these results, I could have saved myself $39,970 and bought a bottle of Hydroxycut - without the scars, thankyouverymuch! He tried the patronizing route first (not good), saying "do you remember what they told you at the seminar, that you wouldn't feel much restriction until about your 3rd fill?" I said no - it'd been over a year since the seminar and they never mentioned that at all, not to mention all we'd heard from the nutritionist, etc was to expect no more than 1/2 - 1 cup food, at the most. besides, I have a friend who got her band filled one time! They filled it until she couldn't swallow - then backed out a couple CC's and that was it! Sweet Spot! None of this 2CCs at a time crap!

To make a long story short (?), I believe he 'heard' me. If not, I like to think he did. It feels satisfying to 'dump' on someone. I got my 2 cc's and my appt for 3rd fill in 4 weeks. But I've come away determined to lose weight before my next visit - whether I feel any restriction or not. I only hurt myself when I take out my frustrations on . . . myself! Makes no sense.

But honestly, it PISSES me off! Those seminars are filled with desparate people grasping for a lifeline. They parade a bunch of pretty, slim 'afters' in front of you. You see stars. I didn't expect it to be an easy walk in the park, but I'm telling you - they never EVER said that it'd be months after surgery before I ever felt any type of restriction. And it really pisses me off when they look at me like I'm a total failure! Would I have made the choice to have the surgery? Yes - no doubt. But I'm not an idiot. I'm an adult. Tell me the truth. Don't set me up for feeling like a total failure (again). Warn me a little!

Anyway, so much for whining. I'm over it. Now it's time to press on. I'll be on yogurt and Soup for a couple days, then it'll be low carb/hi Protein (south beach-esque), kicking up the walking and getting serious. No more taking out my aggravations on myself!

Thanks for listening!

Mary

[Glammaw 15]

I am with you! They never said it would be months before you were able to only eat 4 ounces of food. I waited 8 weeks for my first fill, today, and couldn't get it. My dr. couldn't find the exact spot, after two separate tries, and now I have to have fluoroscopy at the hospital in a week or two. That will be 10 weeks after surgery for my first fill. If I could do this alone, I would have. Never did they tell me I would be up to six months on my own, with no help from my band. I have lost weight, but by willpower only. I understand exactly what you mean. I am angry, too, and feel very misled about the whole process. But, hopefully I will get a fill in a couple of weeks and things will get better. If not, I will have as many as it takes. Good luck with your weightloss.

[rockbandster 0]

This is not your fault. It is your physicians responsibility to educate you on the differences between the available gastric bands. Many of them unfortunatly do not. Overfilling the band too quickly can increase your chances of erosion which may prevent you from ever having a band so do not get caught up on that. Please feel free to reach out on a Private message and I will try and help you...hang in there!

[lapbandmom89 0]

Don't feel bad my daughter had surgery in April and isnt there yet. She is at 8 cc in a 9 cc Realize band. Fills were 5 cc, 1/2 cc, 1 cc, 1 cc, 1/2 cc. Her next appointment is March 4. This doc is very sweet but my daughter won't speak up and say how she's feeling. She just thinks shes a failure. So I think I need to go off on someone and tell them to stop making her feel guilty and get this thing filled up. I think I'm going to insist on them doing it under floro this time. I hate for him to just put a large fill in and then leave, drive three hours home only to have to go back because she can't swallow. But he will only do a fill every 4 weeks, no exceptions so everytime she gets a fill and that doesn't get her to her sweet spot it just means wait another month and struggle another month with dieting. I have to be honest my daughter has ZERO willpower and I have worried that she'll be the one who fails at this but them I have to remind myself that people who get banded are obese right? Willpower is probably always and issue and it the band has worked for those people so it can work for my daughter too. She really needs this to work. She has no self esteem at this point.:thumbdown:

[whosthatgirl 0]

It's all about doing the head work, and you must be taking steps to change your habits along with the band. The band is a tool and it can't work without your help. Hang in there and I hope that restriction kicks in for you real soon! Good luck.

[pstroud100 1]

Ok so normally I would just read post and keep my opinions to myself. However, I have to weigh in on this one. I can sympathize with the slow weight loss. But I went to the same siminar as you and I heard them say that this is not a miracle cure. Emily, Dr. Antonetti, and James all told me that I would probably not feel any restriction until my 3rd or 4th fill. Dr Antonetti even reminded me of that before I had the surgery. I have no one to blame for my slow weight loss but myself. I am sorry that you are having a hard time too but I must take up for the group. I was warned before I had the surgery. Good luck on your journey.

[beautiful mariposa 1]

I see alot of you are in SC I am in the Greenwood area myself. it's good to see other South Carolina people here.

[JASON R 0]

im sorry to see that you all are having problems with your band. i believe i have done good with mine. i have 6cc's in mine now. i have lost over 78 pounds in just a little over 6 months. i did feel some restriction on my 2 nd fill and my 3rd was wow. im thinking about going and getting some took out.

by what i read your dr's didnt do a good job with support and it also looks like some might not have looked into it enough.

may i ask if you all is going support group meetings monthy? and doing your excrise 3 times a week? getting at least 60 grams of Protein and 64 oz of Water in daily? also make sure to read your labels on your food. make sure they are no more then 5 grams of fat and 15 grams of carbs per serving.

im am willing to talk and help out anyone i can you can pm me anytime and ask me anything.

i hope it gtes better all of you.

[lapbandmom89 0]

Still discouraged. My daughter went for her 6th, yes 6th fill last week and still no sweet spot. We are 11 months out and weight loss has stopped. She lost 20 almost instantly and then nothing. A few pounds have even come back on. They look at her and say are you watching your carbs???? She needs to reach that sweet spot! She is now at 8.2 cc in a 9 cc Realize band. I know they say this band can be stubborn but what the heck! Months are ticking by and each month we think this will be the fill that gets her there and I'm beginning to wonder if she will ever get there. I read about people after 11 months losing tons of weight and its not happening here. This can't all be her fault. The idea is to not be able to each much before filling up and if thats not happening then whats the point. Anyone else take this long? Doc will not give fills more than once a month. I sent him an email and basically begged for him to make an exception to his rule. I asked him if there wasn't any way we could get more aggressive.

[MacMadame 81]

Once a month is pretty aggressive, actually. The conservative docs only do it once every 6 weeks.

[davidra 0]

Having just had my first fill after almost three months, it's clear that there are differences between people and how they respond. I had steady weight loss without a fill for a long time....but I also tried to eat reasonably and avoid high calorie stuff. Because of my job, I have not been able to exercise at all. I lost steadily but slowly until 2 weeks ago. After my first fill, I again had an absence of hunger almost 24/7 as I did immediately post-op. In my case, I definitely had a response even without a fill, but YMMV. Stick with it, avoid lots of high calorie food (especially liquids), and it will work with you.

[sexylips 1]

Still discouraged. My daughter went for her 6th, yes 6th fill last week and still no sweet spot. We are 11 months out and weight loss has stopped. She lost 20 almost instantly and then nothing. A few pounds have even come back on. They look at her and say are you watching your carbs???? She needs to reach that sweet spot! She is now at 8.2 cc in a 9 cc Realize band. I know they say this band can be stubborn but what the heck! Months are ticking by and each month we think this will be the fill that gets her there and I'm beginning to wonder if she will ever get there. I read about people after 11 months losing tons of weight and its not happening here. This can't all be her fault. The idea is to not be able to each much before filling up and if thats not happening then whats the point. Anyone else take this long? Doc will not give fills more than once a month. I sent him an email and basically begged for him to make an exception to his rule. I asked him if there wasn't any way we could get more aggressive.

your daughter is not alone i have had the band for two years, yes two years and i have only lost 45 pounds.i lost this weight because after not loossing any weight at all for 1 year i started to diet on my own.till this day i have no restriction only a weard pain when i eat that goes away in afew seconds.i have had 8 fills...no more for me...im gona do it the only way i have done so for the last year diet and exercise....its wonderfull to hear success lapband stories....but please know that there is alot of people just like me and your daughter......keep trying lots of love...

mariah

[OverBeingFat 0]

Hello! I'm in the exact same boat as you. I was banded 12/16/08 and have lost -- wait for it -- 6 whole pounds. I feel like a fat, stupid failure. I also didn't realize it would be several months before I felt restriction. As a 7-year, off-and-on phentermine popper, I know how much weight I can lose when I'm not constantly feeling hungry. I really thought the band would instantly give me that kind of restriction without having to pop pills all the time.

Diet-wise: Now I will say I haven't been under the 30 grams of carbs a day, but I'm close to it. Totally cut out sugars, bread, rice and Pasta.

I went to my support group last Thursday. Started off like normal, we go around the room introducing ourselves, stating our band date and how much weight we've lost. There were two women who were banded last month (Feb. 09) and had lost 25 and 30 lbs. respectively.

When it was my turn, I said my name, band date and my 6 pounds of weight loss and then just started to cry in front of the rest of the group. I felt like an idiot, was totally embarrassed, and yet again, am failing at something so many others have had success with.

The nurse that runs the group pulled me aside after the meeting and had me come in the next day to meet with the head doctor. He sat me down and told me again, how important it was to stay under those 30 grams and how the band was only a tool. Even if I found my sweet spot and could only eat a few bites at a time, if I'm over those 30 grams, my body (lucky me), just can't process the carbs. He explained this is why some people drop tremendous amounts of weight when they get the band by just reducing their food intake and others (again lucky me), must still super-restrict their carbs.

He did overfill my band this time (this is my fourth fill) and then had me drink Water. Water was definitely stuck, so he pulled a few cc's out. However, he said even now that I shouldn't be able to get much down, if I'm eating to many carbs (even if I'm only eating a few bites of food), I just won't lose any weight.

I have to be honest that again, I wasn't at the 30 carb mark. He's asked to me commit two weeks of really staying under that mark and wants to see me back. He's also asked me to commit to one Protein drink for Breakfast and two meals only. No snacking outside those meals. He says to eat as much veggies and Protein in those two meals as I want but again, NO SNACKING. He thinks it's realistic that if I do this, I should be down 10 - 15 pounds next time I go see him.

I really don't want to fail. I'm not going to think past these two weeks. I'm just going to do my best to really restrict the carbs. Even being this full bandwise, I still fighting the hunger. But I'm trying to get through it by telling myself everytime I'm hungry and don't eat, my body has to eat some of my fat.

Good luck and I'm sorry for your struggle (and mine as well).

[MaryBnSC 0]

I've taken the bull by the horns and have made an appointment with a fill center Dr in NC. I go on Wednesday and am really looking forward to it. This is the Dr my friend goes to. She has done amazing and is a walking billboard for the type of fill he gives. He basically fills until you cannot swallow Water, then backs a little out until you can. From what I understand, I'll have to stay there for a certain amount of time (an hour, maybe?) and within that time frame, be able to comfortably drink a bottle of Water.

PStroud, I'm happy it's working for you. I can see that your experience has been different than mine. Perhaps you were told it'd take a long time before the band worked. I was not. I distinctly recall sitting in the nutrition class and being told how we'd only be able to keep down about 1/4 cup of food - and would eventually work up to a full cup. Emily was standing right by me and I can picture her as she was saying it. This has nothing to do with how much I like the staff at the clinic. I believe they are doing everything on the up and up. There is nothing illegal or unethical about their actions. It's simply a matter of $$. This a $$ making machine and the more times they can get me to go in there, the more they can squeeze out of my insurance company. You might think I'm whining or being weak. That's fine. But I'm not concerned with what others think.

My decision to call the Fill Center was based on comparing my experience and results to another persons experience and results. Hers has been better than mine. My last fill was in February. They said I couldn't come back until the end of March, but they weren't booking March yet and they'd give me a call the first part of March. I've heard nothing. I am simply not going to be patronized, humiliated or treated like I'm a stupid, fat, lazy 2nd class citizen anymore. I am taking it into my own hands.

I fully understand that it is up to me to make the changes and the band is a tool. But if the transmission is broke on your car, you don't blame the car make/model for driving poorly - you fix the transmission. Therefore, fix the tool to make it work properly and I'll get this car driving in the right direction. Do you know the only questions I am ever asked by the clinic have to deal with the type of food/drink I am getting? They have never once asked me "how much can you consume in a sitting". Wouldn't that be an obvious question to determine whether or not the band is working or not? (Mechanic: "How's it driving?" vs. "Where are you buying your gas? Do you drive with the windows up or down??")

Guess I'm crazy. I just want this $30,000 damn tool that has left scars on my body to actually work! I don't blame the band (the transmission). Right now, I blame the mechanics who won't fix it. Therefore, I think it's time to take my $$ to a new mechanic.

[lapbandmom89 0]

Nicely put.....my daughter goes Wednesday too to her doc but he will be out of town so she has to see the NP. They are going to take it all out and see whats there and then put it back....all under floro. I feel so bad and we have had soo many arguments about it because I'm frustrated too becuase of the $$ I'm paying.......$733.52 per month.....she said she feels worse than she did before she had the surgery done. Today I watched her eat one of those frozen beef and bean burritos which arent huge but not small either. She probably could have ate more but didn't have time. We then ran a couple errands, maybe 1 1/2 hrs., and she was starving again. That doesn't seem right to me and if they arent always doing the fills under floro then how do they know they havent missed her port on some of these fills or something? One more thing.....eventhough she is not at her sweet spot, occasionally she has terrible pain in her chest and then sometimes it will come up. We think maybe it was just what she ate,not that she is overfilled. Doc says he's concerned because thats both ends of the spectrum.....puking and no restriction. What do you guys think? I'm thinking its what she ate. This last time it was scrammbled eggs with some cheapo so-called american cheese that wouldn't melt. It was like plastic. (We are all trying to watch our $$). It was terribly painful then came up. Is it normal to hurt like that with some foods?

She says that she doesn't want to do nothing else but sit around and think about this band all the time. she wants it to do its job while she gets on with other things in her life. She is very private about having the surgery and didn't tell any friends or family.

Edited March 24, 2009 by lapbandmom89
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