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How forthcoming are you to people when they ask what you did to lose weight?



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How do you answer when people ask, "What did you do to lose so much weight?" Do you tell them about the WLS or do you say diet and exercise? All of my good friends know that I'm having the surgery done but what about acquaintances? I'm not ashamed I'm having the surgery but I also don't want people I don't know very well (who aren't going through WLS) knowing the details.

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I decided to tell people (family, friends and work colleagues) about the surgery for a number of reasons. Firstly I wanted people to understand what I was now able to eat/not eat especially as my surgery was early December and so close to Christmas celebrations. Secondly I wanted to make myself accountable and make sure that this time I didn't fail on my wieght loss attempt. Having surgery is a drastic measure and for me knowing that everyone knew what I'd done would make me stick to my program more effectively. In saying that, I really understand why people choose not to tell others.

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If anyone asks I tell them I got the lap band. I'm happy to have it, proud of doing it, generally pleased about it. Besides, it IS diet and exercise.

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If someone just comments about my weight loss, I just thank them and say something vague, but if someone asks specifically what I am doing, I tell them. Originally, my plan had been to only tell a few people, but I refuse to lie about it. I work for a large organization and I've been there a long time. Also, it's mostly women. Weight loss is a constant conversation topic. I know I've been the subject of lots of lunch table chats, but I'm not really bothered by it. If they didn't discuss my lapband, they'd be still be talking about my weight, but it would most likely sound like, "Have you noticed how much weight she's putting on? She should do something about that!"

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Well, so far no one has been bold enough to ask. If someone did, I would respond with "I am at the Y a minimum of 4 days a week doing weight training, cardio of some sort and I watch what I eat". All true.

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I've told friends, family and co-workers. If asked by anyone else, I will tell them I had surgery. My husband, who had surgery almost a year ago, chooses to tell people that I don't feed him anymore :thumbup:. He's more private than I am.

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I've only told a few people about my surgery. When they ask I tell them diet and exercise. The reason I don't tell them about the lapband is because one of my "friends"

told me I was taking the easy way out . I just want them to know it wasn't just the surgery , I had to diet and exercise to lose the weight .

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I don't tell them.

I say that I "restrict" the amount I eat, and I eat a high Protein diet.

It is not their business as to how I lose weight, and definitely not their business to judge the validity of my choice to have lapband.

So 5 1/2 months post op, my wife, my pastor and 3 friends know.

My mother doesn't know.

My family doesn't know.

Many of my friends don't know.

My Water aerobics class doesn't know.

My co-workers don't know.

My boss doesn't know.

And certainly, no strangers know.

And that's the way I like it.

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I made a decision not to tell everyone prior to getting the band. We all know this is not the easy way out and I just do not want to have to justify myself or my choice to anyone so only people who care about me and I trust to be supportive know. That winds up being a few people in each area of my life and this has worked well for me. When someone compliments my weight loss I thank them for noticing. If they ask how I am doing it I tell them I am eating less and moving more. I did have one co-worker who is also obese ask to speak to me privately and when she shared her struggles and interest in getting banded I shared my story with her. That felt really good but also tells me there may be some chatting going on about how I am losing weight. I agree with cwm, at least they are not talking about how much weight I have gained!

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The only one knows is my spouse. I just tell them I have changed the way I eat. Just yesterday my son asked why I didn,t get something to drink (we were in a rest.) this is 6 months of Sunday dinner with no drinking. I have lost 80lb in 6.5 months and people are just now beginning to ask questions. I just didn,t want people watching every bite I take and judging me on my decison (The Surgery) I have made to change my life. My spouse is my support I need ( and lapband forum) and 3 grandkids are my motivation.

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Hi there :thumbup: I tell everyone and anyone who has asked!

It keeps me accountable to be honest - mind you this is just me and it is my nature to share... not everyone feels this way and it is ok!

I am honest when asked because I know what it is like to be on the other end and if I can help just one person understand this surgery (particularly if they want to have it and are afraid to ask about it) then I am a better person for it.

An example of this is the other night when I was brought to the Emergency Room for my ovarian cyst I had an internal ultra sound done, the woman who did it was pleasant and very quiet (I was doped up on morphine but never quiet lol) she looked at my stomach where my scars are curiously and I blurted out "I had lap band surgery!"

Guess what? Her face changed, she smiled and told me she is thinking of having surgery for Lap Band! It was great to see her smile and to hear her questions - I felt like I helped in some small way.

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All, I told everyone. Ran into a co-worker who showed up at the local support group but she doesn't want anyone to know 9 but that area seems to spread facts and rumors far and wide) ... Well, I let folks know- if it comes up- work with nurses and get asked all the time.:thumbup: My Bro's in-laws, my cousin , and another co-worker are thinking about it..They are curious how it is going.. So far so good. But have to wait for insurance paperwork to get my 1st fill - which kind of slows down the momentum...

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My direct employees in my branch know but my boss doesn't (he doesn't work in my office). My fiance and his mom know and my mom and stepfather know. I had to tell my mom and step dad because she was here for Christmas and she was trying to force food on me every other minute-She is a wonderful Italian mamma that isn't overweight herself but will tell you how fat you are while she's handing you a giant cannoli. But I have not told anyone else. I also haven't lost a bunch to its not that obvious yet. I will cross that bridge when I come to it. I am still coming to terms with my band. I don't really want to get into it with anyone else yet.

I have not told my best friend, who's mom had it done and she has said some pretty nasty things about it. She has always been pretty high and mighty about her own ability to lose weight and not so nice to me about it. The "nicest" thing she said was "If you really wanted to lose weight you would do what it takes-you just don't want it bad enough". Yeah-- not telling her.

It's a totally personal decision....

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Well... if someone asks how I lost weight I usually will tell them that I had the lapband, especially if it is someone that is overweight themself.

I remember how discouraged I would getwhen I was trying to lose weight (prior to banding) and someone else was able to lose weight and I couldn't. I don't want someone feeling that way because of me.

The other benefit is that I am a military spouse and we will be moving from this base sooner or later, at the next base no one will know me as being fat, so no one will ask. So, everyone can know here and in a few years I will be somewhere where no one will know.

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People are starting to ask me. I mentioned all the exercise I'm doing. There were a number of people I told when I had the surgery, because I felt it would make sense for them to know, like my co-workers because we eat together for lunch meetings and my family and close friends.

Other people, I'm not really telling UNLESS they are overweight and struggling, then I will share my story with them.

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