Whats wrong with people?

spldgrl · August 1, 2005

The hardest thing coming from a "fat" home is the mental pressure we put on our selves. I recently found a motivating self esteem curriculmn that I facalitate. It teaches how to focus on the positive, set goals, and the affirmation process. I taught a class yesterday, (skinny or fat, the same issues from our youth only their physical stature is different) and I had to explain to a "skinny" girl how to accept and believe a compliment. she had never been complimented and thought it was true. "only saying it" He family only told her negative things and she has less than no self esteem. I wish everyone who suffers from low self esteem could reach this curriculm. If interested further try:thepacificinstitute.com or loutice.com

Why is family so much meaner than friends and why can we say good bye to bad friends but no bad family? Heres to changing that chain reaction and passing the POWER onto our children and grand children.

kathlnc · August 2, 2005

My parents are both dead now, but they had similar problems communicating. In response, I tried to become the most perfect daughter there ever was. HA! People are flawed, we are not perfect.

Anyway, try this (compliments of lots of counseling):

Stop the conversation. Tell your mother what you see happening. Tell her how you feel about what is happening. Tell her what you want to happen. So, when she makes a comment about your fatness/whatever, say,

"Mom, it sounds like you think I'm fat.

When you say things like that, it hurts me in my heart.

Please do not say that to me again."

Repeat every time she makes such comments. Even if it takes your mom a while to get the picture, you will find that just being assertive and direct will make you feel much better about the situation. Saying your feelings out loud will help you stay in touch with yourself. If she persists in her behavior, then she is obviously trying to be negative and has a lack of regard for your feelings. Eliminate negative people from your life.....too much baggage to carry with you.

K