Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Virtual psychiatry



Recommended Posts

Because it's late, and I'm bored, and I can't access chat, I'm starting a new thread (May it be as prolific as the 6300+ post PJTP):

Virtual Psychiatry

Come on in, recline on the couch and tell me all about it. Phobias, dream analysis, electroshock therapy, I'll do it all, except housecalls.

Advice not meant to be taken seriously. Do not bring any serious or emotionally painful problems in here, as I'll probably end up mocking them. Sure, my advice sucks, but ya gets what ya pays for.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hello friend

i was gonna post about my dreami had 2 nightmares about my son 1 he drowned at the park and no one pulled him from the Water ...and 2 he was kidnappped at the airport and we only found his clothes both were terrible and very real i didnt send justin to daycare today because i just wanted him home today because of the dreams last night ...and also i had chili before bed

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Help! I've been banded and now I'm a fat girl that eats like a skinny girl but the fat refuses to depart! Any insight, Doc?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hello friend

i was gonna post about my dreami had 2 nightmares about my son 1 he drowned at the park and no one pulled him from the Water ...and 2 he was kidnappped at the airport and we only found his clothes both were terrible and very real i didnt send justin to daycare today because i just wanted him home today because of the dreams last night ...and also i had chili before bed

For real? How scary!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hello friend

i was gonna post about my dreami had 2 nightmares about my son 1 he drowned at the park and no one pulled him from the Water ...and 2 he was kidnappped at the airport and we only found his clothes both were terrible and very real i didnt send justin to daycare today because i just wanted him home today because of the dreams last night ...and also i had chili before bed

Hmmmmm, yes. The effects of chili upon dreams are well documented. Clearly the classic anxiety dream has been influenced by your choice of late night nutrition. Also, I believe you are crazy.

Prescription: Only eat dream-friendly "wolf"-brand chili before bed. All of the taste, 1/2 of the nightmares of other chilis.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Help! I've been banded and now I'm a fat girl that eats like a skinny girl but the fat refuses to depart! Any insight, Doc?

Interesting. As I've seen your photo album, I can attest that you are no longer fat. That you see yourself as such suggests issues of body dysmorphia.

Prescription: Smash all mirrors in your house whildst screaming like a banshee. Then wear a bikini to work....If your boss objects tell him / her that your internet psychiatrist said they could "suck it". I will fax you a note to that effect if needed.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

omg you are to funny ....but i knew the part about the crazy its like my middle name ...that why i cant leave bf whos gonna put up with all this crazy...i just need to work out more my mp3 broke and i havent been able to get all my crazy out on the treadmill ...look plain you helped me help myself your the best....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Interesting. As I've seen your photo album, I can attest that you are no longer fat. That you see yourself as such suggests issues of body dysmorphia.

Prescription: Smash all mirrors in your house whildst screaming like a banshee. Then wear a bikini to work....If your boss objects tell him / her that your internet psychiatrist said they could "suck it". I will fax you a note to that effect if needed.

So, when I think I catch glimpses of size 4, that's my true image and not wishful thinking? LOL

I'll be sure to tell my boss to "suck it" and let her know that my doc prescribed it as therapy.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'll be sure to tell my boss to "suck it" and let her know that my doc prescribed it as therapy.

If I need to "dumb down" the highly clinical language for your boss, I will.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So, shall we address your issues, Plain? I seem to recall that you had a penchant for eating cheetos in the nude whilst providing online therapy to desperate overweight women.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes, well, this is awkward.....but you've both been so forthcoming that I will share some deep dark secrets:

I occasionally like to attach clothespins to my body whildst sporting a sailor suit. I find it soothing to yell at an antique Barbie doll that I've named "mother". I sometimes loiter at the produce section of my local Walmart and giggle when the elderly ladies pick up a cucumber. My oral fixation is so pronounced that I frequently must wear a "spit cup" affixed under my chin with a velcro strap.

But other than those things, I think I'm pretty well adjusted.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The craziest part of it all is that I can actually picture you doing all of those things! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

LOL....bunch o' smart asses! I open up to y'all and I get mercilessly mocked...."mother" is going to hear about this!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×