What's a good way to meet a guy? Do guys actually like bigger girls?

[Amethystjade 1]

Okay so here's a kinda weird post for me.. Do guys actually like bigger girls? I guess some have to, because bigger people have boyfriend/girlfriend relationships.. I guess I just never found any that liked me? This is really awkward for me because I see people who are less attractive than I am (no offense to anyone, and Im not trying to say I'm pretty or anything like that..)..

But I dont get it.. Also tiny itty bitty girls or normal girls go out with BIG guys (no offense to them), it just seems really unfair that big guys can totally be in a relationship no problem, while bigger girls end up being last resorts for most guys, like a hit it and quit it thing..

What are some things I can do to get myself noticed? Seriously, I'm surrounded by people all the time, but I'm beyond lonely right now.. Stupid holidays.. To be honest, I'm a little shy around guys, I crack awkward jokes some times..

anyways, any suggestions from guys or girls would be awesome..

[Firedad53073 4]

I can’t speak for other guys but I prefer a lady with curves.

I have just recently met the gal of my dreams and am madly in love with her and she is a size 18/20. she is always saying she needs to lose weight but I think she is perfect. If she wants to lose the weight to be healthy I don’t have a problem with that but I let her know I would love her no matter what size she was.

[Amethystjade 1]

I'm never quiet sure what guy means by curves? Are we talking like boobs, some rolls to make the curves in the tummy and some hips and maybe an ass? LOL.. Or are we talking boobs thicker tummy but no rolls and some hips.. =)

[travelinsnorkel 0]

I have mostly met guys online. I've dated mostly thinner guys and they didn't have a problem with my weight. I think that there are a good chunk of guys out there who won't date larger women, but there are a lot who will! It does sometimes take longer to find those guys, but they are out there. Being confident in yourself and projecting that helps a lot. Good luck!

[katiebug 6]

I don't see how you couldn't have a boyfriend. You are fucking gorgeous.

I wish I could help, but I can't. See, I've had two boyfriends, but it was before I was banded. Now that I'm almost at goal, I've been having sex every once in awhile, but no steady boyfriend. & that's all I really want.

You seem like a pretty confident & funny person, which is the only thing I could suggest, since I know that's what I need. I hope this could have helped in come way haha.

[Amethystjade 1]

Thanks,

I've had boyfriends in the past, but they weren't like actual boyfriends.. I guess it's hard to explain what they were.

I know confidence is a big factor, I'm slowly building more..I guess I need to be more proximity with the same boys, cause being close is suppose to make the heart grow fonder haha! I think my humor makes up for my cooking...This girl can barely cook.. I know numbers to restraunts though haha.. I can bake really good, but that got me into this weight mess..

I guess when a guy tells me my cooking is great, thats when I know its true love ha ha..:laugh:

[KikiVal315 4]

confidence and how you carry yourself is everything my dear... well not everything, but it plays a huge roll in how men see you. i always had bf's when i was bigger and i met my husband when i was at the weight i am now; i ballooned to 278 lbs within months after we got married, he never said a word about the weight gain, but when i would bring it up he was always supportive. different strokes for different folks, ya know what i mean? so, YES there are men out there that do like big girls, you just got to look more closely :laugh:

[kyethra 0]

I met my husband when I was 240 pounds. We met at the hospital-- at a lecture series on the digestive tract called community medical school. Such a romantic setting, I know. Back in that time we were both considering going to med school. Well we were talking and he asked if I wanted to go get something to eat. I said no, not then because I was way too tired and had been up too long but maybe this weekend. And I had been up way too long. Long day. So I went home and we had coffee that weekend (he said he didn't like coffee and I said what, you don't drink any kind of coffee? What about tea? And he said that he guessed he did drink some sugary coffee things. So I said, ok then, we will have coffee. So we had coffee and talked for hours. And we went out again, and sometimes I would say no, or back off a little. But for the most part he was good. And not boring. I never had tons of dates but I could usually find a guy interested in me-- and these weren't even bigger guys. But the trick is finding a guy you are also interested in. I tended to assume that of course most guys would be interested in me if they weren't completely shallow and those are the kind you don't want to date anyway. I mean I've always been totally cute and sexy before the surgery anyway I had great boobs. Now they sort of hang there, and sag... But I have a variety of Spanx and so forth and that helps in general. And my hair is gorgeous. I think self esteem is something a person has to work at, actively. If you feel awkward, etc. then that shows. But practice feeling good about how you look and then that will show as well.

[scarecrow 4]

Okay so here's a kinda weird post for me.. Do guys actually like bigger girls? I guess some have to, because bigger people have boyfriend/girlfriend relationships.. I guess I just never found any that liked me?

anyways, any suggestions from guys or girls would be awesome..

<3 Amethystjade

I've read your posts on here and thought you were funny, witty, and probably someone fun to hang out with. However - just a total guess here - but I bet you're not half as confident and comfortable with yourself "out there" as you are in here.

Guys over 25 are simple organisms. I'm a guy, I know. Hell you know, and you're not a guy. This is blunt and a bit abrasive, but - if we can look at a girl and think "yeah, I'd do her," then she has just as much of a chance as any 100lbs'er to get the guy. We first have to make that sexual connection in our minds to a woman before we even consider anything else. That's not our fault, that's natures way of getting it's job done.

Most guys can be attracted to any girl. If a girl looks attractive, she normally dresses more revealing. Shows more skin. Moves and talks in more suggestive ways, whether she is 1% interested in the guy or not. They exude more sexuality both because they are aware they are sexy, and because they are probably having more sex - which makes pheromone excretions stronger.

Thicker girls generally don't feel as attractive. They don't show a lot of skin. They don't flirt much. They're not suggestive in movement or conversation.

I'm not talking slutty, I'm talking suggestive. Slight cleavage is suggestive. Short miniskirts are slutty (though I'm still a big fan.) Big difference.

My point is, the difference between these women isn't that only one is sexual. Both have the same wants in needs. But only ones displaying it. Only one is sending the message to every mans brain she meets that she is a healthy female capable sexual activity - and more importantly conceiving children.

I see it over and over on these forums about how women plan on doing things skinny girls do AFTER they're skinny. With all due respect ladies, the acts of doing those things is 90% of whats sexy to guys. Not necessarily the girls doing them. Why can't you dress sexy? Why can't you be suggestive to a random guy you find attractive? Trust me, the guys are more than comfortable with the way you look - they just wish you were as comfortable with yourselves as the skinny girls.

That's all just my opinion. I stress the initial sexual connection to men, only to create the initial necessary tension. After a man has got the idea in his head that you'd be a fun sexual partner, everything past that is just personality - which you have plenty of if you let it out. Those skinny skanks stopped using that years ago : P.

Be a little sexual, be fun. Be someone you wouldn't mind spending an evening on the couch with.

If I had the choice between a thick girl that was funny, fun in bed, and loyal to me - and a skinny girl that was subpar everywhere but the waist line, I'd go for the one that was more fun any day. Most guys would.

If you're really trying to meet a guy, send the messages of this. Act available. Talk to guys. Most guys like to feel like they pursued you, so let them think that if they want : P. But plant your seeds. Talk to ppl. Talk to random ppl. There is nothing more attractive to me than a woman that comes up and talks to me ... in the line at the supermarket, or at the gym. It makes ME feel good about myself too, which is never a bad thing and can never hurt. Trust me, you'll never hurt a mans feelings by sparking up a conversation with him. He'll feel good about himself all day. And he'll be genuinely intrigued by your confidence.

[jfrost6 0]

Scarecrow hit the nail dead on. I am a guy and in a relationship with a thicker girl and I find her more attractive than anyone I have ever met. She is a very fun person to be with and she has a great personality. Dont just think that since you are a thicker girl than any skinny out there that you cant get the guy of your dreams. Most girls out there have a hard time with that since I know a lot of guys just want one thing and then move on but thats just how they work.

All in all just be yourself and have fun. You will find more guys that way.

[Amethystjade 1]

Thanks for all the advice, especially the brutal honestly ones..Brutal honestly is the best thing someone can offer.. The truth doesn't have to be pretty as long as it's the truth. Sometimes the truth can hurt and sometimes it can really truely help someone.

Reading theses comments makes me want to curl all my hair up and put tons of hair spray (thats when I feel the sexiest, for some reason).. Put on some hot underwear, there is something about wearing sexy underwear that can put pep in a girls step.. Seriously just knowing you got some hot underwear under your clothes should make any girl be like that's right bitches..haha.. anyways, I want to do all that and go out there and be like hello boys..rarr

Now where to find all the single guys, hmm =). Thanks again, any more advice keep it rolling in..

[mhough326 0]

Well I am a guy and as my friends and I say just about any girl is hot as long as she is confident and actually cares about herself. I personally like a strong personality and I blame the women I work with as well as my job. I dont really know what to tell you because I have had the same problem but with women not men...

[Amethystjade 1]

oh yeah? whats your job, and why do you blame them? I know both sides have this problem, I might be a little bias because I am a girl... But, I think women give men more of a chance, but maybe women just put their signal out there more that they do and men hide it better? I mean whats a good way to see that the guy is interested in you, rather than not seeing that he's not into you until too late?

[mhough326 0]

I work for a police department and I do 911/dispatch for a decent sized city. I blame the women I work with because for just about the past 4 yrs I have worked with nothing but, women with very strong personalities and opinions. SO now timid shy people bore me.

i dont know for me I was raised kind of old school and very southern but, I just always go out of my way to talk to her and make sure that I make some sort of physical contact its all about the body language. If it is reciprocated then usually you are good to go. I am finally realizing that rejection is not the worst thing in life.

[Amethystjade 1]

Rejection isn't the worse thing in life, but no one likes it.. Well most everyone doesn't.. Personality definitly makes the person hotter and more likeable. Sometimes it's a little harder for your personality to shine, especially when your shy at first. It takes me a few hours sometimes to get all crazy and talk a lot. I've never been a good actor, I've always been the behind the stage person.. But i can't wait for my first performance center stage . What do you do once ur rejected? was it really hard at first?