Average age of a Bandster?

[BJean 16]

"All that matters is that you have focus and will power to change your life. Other than that it shouldn't matter what age you are as long as your doing this for the right reasons."

Sarah, I doubt if anyone would debate that statement. However, if we have the focus and willpower to change our lives and we're doing it for "all the right reasons" what would make us need the band?

I'd be interested in knowing what you believe the right reasons are. And how you discovered your willpower to change your life. Did you have that revelation before or after you got the band?

[Carrie_C 9]

I totally understand what you're saying Carrie. And they're points well taken. I was just the opposite when I was young. Now that I'm older and have been heavy for 20 years, my knees are so shot that I can't exercise like I did when I was young. I played a lot of racquetball and volleyball and did long bike rides. I gradually stopped being so active and that's when I began to have a weight problem.

Everyone is different. Lots of people were overweight when they were young. I was very small. I didn't party much when I was young either. I was way too serious. I'm over that now and as far as I'm concerned, I'm wanting to have as much fun as possible in the freakin' years I have left.

It looks to me like you are going very well with the band and I congratulate you on your success!

Thanks! I understand what you are saying though about being older. It does make it a lot harder to exercise. I am only 31 but I have bad knees too. I'm guessing from all the weight they have had to carry all these years. I didn't really have a weight problem until I was about 18 and got out on my own. It seemed like the pounds just kept piling on each year until I got to 260 pounds. I wasted my 20s being fat, I'm determined not to waste my 30s and the rest of my life being fat and miserable!

[BJean 16]

Carrie I am thrilled for you. My 30s were probably the most fun in my life, so far. I was slim and trim and incredibly active and involved in the community, my children, my husband and just life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Not in that order of course.

When I bacame fat, I was totally focused on myself. I became someone who didn't want to get out and be involved in all of the things that I had enjoyed in my 30s. It was a lousy way to live. Since I got the band, I'm back into the swing of things, a valuable citizen and although I haven't lost as much weight as I wanted to, I haven't given up. And I did stop thinking about myself and my troubles so much and consequently I am much happier (and the people around me are too!)

You're smart to have learned what you have about yourself at such an early age. I am proud of you and I hope you will enjoy life to the fullest! So much of it passes by before you know it. And you wake up one morning and wonder why you wasted any time at all.

Best wishes to you for your continued success on your life journey!

[blackcherry2002 5]

I think it really depends on the person. I am young, I had the surgery when I was 18. I started reading about it on May 27, 2008 and had the band by July 29, 2008...I knew it was right for me and I am pleased with my (slow) progress...I also have PCOS and hypothyroidism so I am going pretty slow but I'm thankful for it none the less and going this slow I"ve also been able to change my habits slowly...so I hope they last long term. I had a mother who had the bypass in her 40's after heart surgery so I really didn't think it was impossible for anyone. Just takes a change of thought and habits is all.

[DivaStyleCoach 89]

Good morning All!

I'm watching the discourse regarding age and being banded with interest, because of my own situation and my daughters.

I posted earlier in the thread - banded at 45, now 46, am down 50 pounds in the 8 months since being banded (got a slow start, now doing very well) and feeling very hopeful about the next 40 or so years of my life.

My daughter just turned 18 last December, has been heavy most of her teen years, and really wants WLS. I don't feel she's ready - mentally. She's not really physically active - we encourage her, but you can only push someone so far...unfortunately, she is a 'sneak eater'...we find remnants of food around the house in strange places...

She has a friend whose older sister was bypassed, lost a LOT of weight, and has started gaining it back. This same friend's mom was also bypassed, and she's done very well - in fact, she's almost too thin. Those are her primary 'role models' besides myself...I feel for her - it probably isn't easy for her to watch me go through this, getting thinner, and things are not changing for her, but I don't think she's ready.

I encouraged her to keep a food diary - knowing that was one of the first steps I had to do to qualify for the surgery - and she isn't doing it. She's contacted other WL programs, but everything costs so much. My insurance through my employer will cover it, but I'm reluctant to start the process with her because she hasn't had the 'try and fail' process that I've seen reported here on the site.

Would some of the younger Bandsters who watch this thread please either post here or send me a PM - what made you realize that you were ready for the surgery? What advice would you give a younger person to get them ready for WLS?

I want her to be healthy (family history of diabetes, heart disease, etc scares me for her future) but I don't want her to have the surgery and then fail at it because she wasn't mentally ready to do it...:thumbdown:

[greytz 4]

I am 50 and just got my band. I got fat in my later years and this is a godsend for me. I will have my first fill on 07-07-09. Lost 17lbs so far. Got 56 lbs. to go.

[blackcherry2002 5]

EbonyRose...Not going to lie I'm a sneak eater too. And my mother had the bypass and lost a bunch and then gained some back. However I would encourage your daughter to get the lapband. For me so much has changed since I had surgery.

I might not be exercising all the time or eating like a health freak. I am relatively normal. But I used to be the extreme of bad habits. My mother was overweight and so she would comment on my weight and what I ate and it hurt me, so I backlashed (unfortunately against myself) and I ate anyway and twice as bad.

I practically never moved, I ate bags of candy at a time, almost everday. I ate fast food for almost every meal. So I no longer eat candy everyday, I make small changes to move and I eat fast food maybe once or twice a month and I make better choices. If I had gotten the bypass I would have relied on it and gotten really skinny while keeping my bad habits. Instead I chose this route and slowly, just like my weight, my bad habits have dropped off.

Your daughter must make this choice for herself, though encourage her. I didn't realize how bad my situation was until I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism, PCOS and Trigeminal Neuralgia in one year. I also ballooned and topped out at 267lbs at 5'4".

I also didn't really "try and fail". As I was always about 40lbs overweight but as I said, I ballooned when I went hypothyroid. But because of my health problems and my family history I was approved.

Honestly I probably wasn't mentally ready either but after surgery that went away quickly. I'd be glad to help you if you have any other questions, you can PM me.

[DivaStyleCoach 89]

Blackcherry - thank you so much for your candor...:thumbdown:

I agree that the bypass wouldn't be the best choice for her, as I feel she'd probably rebound due to her eating habits. I will continue to encourage her and we'll see what the summer brings.

My hope is that she'll decide for herself, and then we have the big job: convincing her DAD that this is the right thing for her...

[BJean 16]

EbonyRose, I am curious. You feel that people with the band have less tendancy to rebound after the initial weight loss than people with gastric bypass?

The reason I ask is because although I have seen lots of people with gastric bypass lose tons of weight very quickly, and they often regain some of the lost weight, they eventually stabilize at a reasonable weight - not too skinny but not morbidly obese either.

With the band, I've noticed that some people lose an initial 30 to 50 lbs. and just can't get much more off. I have also seen lots of people that it has worked really well for, but it hasn't been my experience and I've noticed quite a few others in my doctor's practice and here on LBT, who aren't having the amazing success that some have.

[DivaStyleCoach 89]

EbonyRose, I am curious. You feel that people with the band have less tendancy to rebound after the initial weight loss than people with gastric bypass?

The reason I ask is because although I have seen lots of people with gastric bypass lose tons of weight very quickly, and they often regain some of the lost weight, they eventually stabilize at a reasonable weight - not too skinny but not morbidly obese either.

With the band, I've noticed that some people lose an initial 30 to 50 lbs. and just can't get much more off. I have also seen lots of people that it has worked really well for, but it hasn't been my experience and I've noticed quite a few others in my doctor's practice and here on LBT, who aren't having the amazing success that some have.

Hi BJean,

No, not at all...I only know a few people who have had the bypass - a co-worker and her husband, the mom of my DD's friend, and the sister of my DD's friend...I did visit the bypass support group in my area before I was banded, but did not hear any stories of rebounding from them. Only the sister of my DD's friend has rebounded - and she only gained SOME of her weight back. I haven't seen her in a while, but have heard she's doing better after renewing the good habits she initially adopted after her surgery.

I think my DD might rebound because unless she changes her eating habits, she will not be successful. That's with either surgery - not just the bypass. I believe, for my DD, that the bypass would give her the "instant gratification" she seeks, in that the weight might come off more quickly than with the band, but I also believe that she NEEDS to change her eating habits, or NEITHER surgery will be successful for her long-term.

I think the band MIGHT work better for my DD because she will have to do more work with her eating habits and exercise to be successful...I'm hopeful that the re-education process that I've gone through to reach my current level of success would also be part of her process.

So far, it hasn't made much of a difference - she and my DH were supposed to 'follow' my eating habits the first few weeks after I was banded so that I wouldn't feel bad about having to eat only liquids while they ate 'regular' food...he did better than she did with that...and though we have made family-wide changes in our eating, she has not had much success because she continues to 'sneak eat'.

It hurts me to see her struggle while I am succeeding...I can see it in her eyes...she wants to be happy for me, and I think she is, but she's also wondering 'why not me?' and right now, I don't think my answer of "you're not ready" is sitting too well with her...:thumbdown:

[sweetheart181 10]

I'm watching the discourse regarding age and being banded with interest, because of my own situation and my daughters.

I posted earlier in the thread - banded at 45, now 46, am down 50 pounds in the 8 months since being banded (got a slow start, now doing very well) and feeling very hopeful about the next 40 or so years of my life.

My daughter just turned 18 last December, has been heavy most of her teen years, and really wants WLS. I don't feel she's ready - mentally. She's not really physically active - we encourage her, but you can only push someone so far...unfortunately, she is a 'sneak eater'...we find remnants of food around the house in strange places...

She has a friend whose older sister was bypassed, lost a LOT of weight, and has started gaining it back. This same friend's mom was also bypassed, and she's done very well - in fact, she's almost too thin. Those are her primary 'role models' besides myself...I feel for her - it probably isn't easy for her to watch me go through this, getting thinner, and things are not changing for her, but I don't think she's ready.

I encouraged her to keep a food diary - knowing that was one of the first steps I had to do to qualify for the surgery - and she isn't doing it. She's contacted other WL programs, but everything costs so much. My insurance through my employer will cover it, but I'm reluctant to start the process with her because she hasn't had the 'try and fail' process that I've seen reported here on the site.

Would some of the younger Bandsters who watch this thread please either post here or send me a PM - what made you realize that you were ready for the surgery? What advice would you give a younger person to get them ready for WLS?

I want her to be healthy (family history of diabetes, heart disease, etc scares me for her future) but I don't want her to have the surgery and then fail at it because she wasn't mentally ready to do it...

I don't know your daughter so I can't really speak for her but I wouldn't have been ready for WLS when I was 18. One of the big reasons why is because honestly I didn't even start contemplating it until I was almost 18. I wouldn't have had any idea what to expect. I had the surgery when I was 21 after visiting multiple surgeons and doing hours of research. the only person who would be able to tell whether or not she is mentally ready is your daughter.

Now before my surgery my grandma was the one really trying to get me to lose weight and the way she did that was to criticize everything I ate and comment on my weight all the time. This really hurt. I definitely tried to eat my pain away, not just the pain I was feeling from my grandma but also from having soooo much pressure to be thin at school too. I just wanted my family to be supportive and realize that as much as I wanted to lose weight I didn't have enough will power to just start eating better.

I never really realized I was ready for surgery I just knew how bad I wanted this! Up until the day of surgery I thought I would fail because I couldn't control my cravings for fast food before surgery why would that change after the surgery. I guess I realized I was ready for this once I was banded and was doing the post op diet( one month Clear Liquids then one month mushies). I started to see the weight just fall off and something just clicked. I want to be able to run with people my own age and go on an airplane without worrying if I'm going to fit in the seat.

As many people say, this is not a diet. The band helps you eat better portions not necessarily eat healthier, that's your job. I still eat some junk food but I don't beat myself up for it. Everything is fine in moderation.

I would tell her to be 100% positive that this is the road she wants to take. Now this doesn't mean that she will be ready for surgery but hopefully it will mean that she is really motivated to succeed.

If you have any questions you can always PM me or if your daughter has any questions she can email me at sarah.alhussein@gmail.com

oh and one more thought. Many people that get bypass do gain some weight back. That's why the band is so great if you do start to gain some back you can get another fill to get back on track.:thumbdown:

[blackcherry2002 5]

It is very easy to rebound with the bypass. It does happen to quite a few (not all). But their stomachs start out smaller and they can strech. Also, as in my mom's case, you can learn to munch throuhgout the day, therefore increasing your daily caloric intake. With the band, if I notice I'm not losing it forces me to look at myself and think about what I'm eating and the choices I"m making. The people that get stuck at 30-50 might not be choosing the best habits or they might have a doctor unwilling to help them get to their fill sweet-spot. For instance, I had ok restriction and I was stuck at about 45lbs lost and then went in for another small fill and boom! it started coming off again. I've cut out a lot of breads, fried foods, fast food. I'm cooking for myself, no matter how chaotic my daily schedule is, and well the weight is coming off again. I'm so glad for the slowness too. As when my mother had the bypass, though she had an existing heart problem, it made her weaker, and she ended up with congestive heart failure, having to get her gall bladder out, and a heart valve replaced as well as a pacemaker. She was having a hard time getting Protein and nutrients down and it's still a struggle for her. I'm glad with the lapband it is adjustable so we can really truely think about our health, not just losing this damned weight.

[DivaStyleCoach 89]

I don't know your daughter so I can't really speak for her but I wouldn't have been ready for WLS when I was 18. One of the big reasons why is because honestly I didn't even start contemplating it until I was almost 18. I wouldn't have had any idea what to expect. I had the surgery when I was 21 after visiting multiple surgeons and doing hours of research. the only person who would be able to tell whether or not she is mentally ready is your daughter.

Thank you, Sweetheart (and I mean that!)...I don't think she's really ready right now. I think she sees it as 'easy'...

Now before my surgery my grandma was the one really trying to get me to lose weight and the way she did that was to criticize everything I ate and comment on my weight all the time. This really hurt. I definitely tried to eat my pain away, not just the pain I was feeling from my grandma but also from having soooo much pressure to be thin at school too. I just wanted my family to be supportive and realize that as much as I wanted to lose weight I didn't have enough will power to just start eating better.

My mom, God rest her soul, was tough on me about my weight...she would have been the same to my daughter, and I'm glad she doesn't have to face that right now (though I miss my mom terribly). As a teen, I know she's under a lot of pressure - she just graduated high school, and many days she came home in tears because someone said something mean to her...

I never really realized I was ready for surgery I just knew how bad I wanted this! Up until the day of surgery I thought I would fail because I couldn't control my cravings for fast food before surgery why would that change after the surgery. I guess I realized I was ready for this once I was banded and was doing the post op diet( one month Clear Liquids then one month mushies). I started to see the weight just fall off and something just clicked. I want to be able to run with people my own age and go on an airplane without worrying if I'm going to fit in the seat.

I think she wants to be THIN badly, not necessarily to be HEALTHY, which is what I want FOR her...it's a tough balancing act...

As many people say, this is not a diet. The band helps you eat better portions not necessarily eat healthier, that's your job. I still eat some junk food but I don't beat myself up for it. Everything is fine in moderation.

I agree...everything in moderation...

I would tell her to be 100% positive that this is the road she wants to take. Now this doesn't mean that she will be ready for surgery but hopefully it will mean that she is really motivated to succeed.

If you have any questions you can always PM me or if your daughter has any questions she can email me at sarah.alhussein@gmail.com

Thank you so much...I'll pass that along to her...

oh and one more thought. Many people that get bypass do gain some weight back. That's why the band is so great if you do start to gain some back you can get another fill to get back on track.:crying:

I agree, and it's part of the reason I went with the band. Surgery is forever...you cannot, to my knowledge, get a bypass reversed easily. If the band did not work for me, I had other alternatives...so far, I'm very happy with my band.

It is very easy to rebound with the bypass. It does happen to quite a few (not all). But their stomachs start out smaller and they can strech.

I am afraid that would happen to my DD...

Also, as in my mom's case, you can learn to munch throuhgout the day, therefore increasing your daily caloric intake. With the band, if I notice I'm not losing it forces me to look at myself and think about what I'm eating and the choices I"m making.

That has been MY experience as well...

The people that get stuck at 30-50 might not be choosing the best habits or they might have a doctor unwilling to help them get to their fill sweet-spot. For instance, I had ok restriction and I was stuck at about 45lbs lost and then went in for another small fill and boom! it started coming off again.

Same here...I haven't gotten 'stuck' for very long, usually not more than a week or 10 days, but it's frustrating when it happens. My first 3 months, almost no progress...the last 5 - great progress and steady losses.

I've cut out a lot of breads, fried foods, fast food. I'm cooking for myself, no matter how chaotic my daily schedule is, and well the weight is coming off again. I'm so glad for the slowness too.

Me too...I think I appreciate it more because it is NOT happening faster...

As when my mother had the bypass, though she had an existing heart problem, it made her weaker, and she ended up with congestive heart failure, having to get her gall bladder out, and a heart valve replaced as well as a pacemaker. She was having a hard time getting Protein and nutrients down and it's still a struggle for her. I'm glad with the lapband it is adjustable so we can really truely think about our health, not just losing this damned weight.

I too have a heart condition - atrial fibrillation - and I lost my mom to congestive heart failure and diabetes. I am also a type II diabetic - it was the combination of conditions that finally made me get serious about my weight loss. My band doc actually recommended the bypass to me because it's an 'instant' cure for diabetes (or so they say) but I was adamant about doing it more slowly so that I HAD to make the lifestyle changes. I am also chronically anemic, so changing the way my body absorbs nutrients and Vitamins from food was NOT high on my list.

Thank you ladies, for your insight and your concern. I will share your stories with my DD and let her know where to find you if she wants to talk...:rolleyes2:

[Libbyjane1976 1]

I'm 32 and I should've gone through with this 4 years ago when I had the chance (and the approval). I started the process by attending a seminar and a referral from my PCP. Stupid me never made the follow up appointment with the doctor. It took me 4 years and 30 more lbs before I finally said enough was enough and committed myself to it. Best thing I've ever done. I've never been more happier in my life than I am right now! I can't wait for bathing suit season next year!!!

[skuzie 0]

hi kelstar,

i used to think it was the easy way out, but through reasearch, i realised its actually harder than a normal diet which im sure im not the only one who has cheated on!!!

i decided to get it done, im 28, and didnt want to be 30 and still be overweight, being a lardarse is no fun, so over it, summer is like being in an oven and the self disrespect i was totally over!

i feel good, everyone at work is totally supportive and my family who all live interstate from me, im in australia, are very happy and cant wait to see me in a couple of months, i agree, i wish i had of done it 4 years ago at least!!!

sus