starting a new life... with lots of problems from the old one.

[Erikka97330 0]

Hey everyone,

I have come to the realization that the reason that I started gaining weight when I was younger was to stop the abuse I was going threw... mental, physical, and sexual. So now that I am an adult and have a bmi of 55.5 and finally ready to shed the pounds there is a little battle going on inside me. I dont know how I will handle the weight loss... i mean I know I wont ever be a skinny minny, but my goal is to lose 150 lbs. then i would be 200 lbs. Ive never had men that were interested in the real me come up to me and start a conversation. The ones I have met in the past wanted something from me... money.. my vehicle... a place to live.. you know someone to mooch off of. and at that time I wasnt strong enough and didnt belive in myself enough to stand up and tell them to take a hike. And I dont know how to flirt... never needed to ya know I was the fat girl that nobody was interested in. but now I see that there is more to me then my apearance. I mean that does help get the door open to start conversations with new people, but from there on out its all me. so anyways what I guess Im tryingto say is does anyone have any advice on how I can get ready for the daiting scean.. (havent had surgery yet but I want to start practicing for when It happens and I start losing weight) and where are some good places to meet people... im not into the bar scean... anyways thanks and have a great day.

Erikka from oregon

[heartfire 4]

I'm so NOT single and haven't been for almost 22 yrs BUT I wanted to say that with all of the garbage you've gone through, I REALLY think counseling would be an excellent idea. You got a lot of mental stuff you need to deal with in order to help get yourself healthy. A counselor can also help get you prepared for the "new you" and dating and help get rid of that "sucker" sign off of your forehead! It really comes down to how we look at ourselves and teach people how to treat us (me included!). I'm one who hates making a scene. Well, sometimes, you really just have to. I hate it though!

Anyway, that's my 2 cents! Take it for what's it's worth! LOL!

Take care and best wishes on your journey to a new and healthy you!