Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Husband overweight and jealous



Recommended Posts

Has anyone had any problem with their marriage since losing weight? My husband likes the new me, but is so overly jealous and protective. He has even accused me of things that aren't happening. It has been very painful and is hurting our marriage. Any words of wisdom?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Has anyone had any problem with their marriage since losing weight? My husband likes the new me, but is so overly jealous and protective. He has even accused me of things that aren't happening. It has been very painful and is hurting our marriage. Any words of wisdom?

It might be time to see a counselor. If he won't go with you, go alone. This might help to address why he is feeling insecure in your marriage. I have read on this and other forums about the changes in a marriage after one spouse loses weight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am going through something similar. My hubby has been moody lately and is making comments about him feeling/being fat. He is very much apple shaped, where he has lean arms and legs and carries his weight in his belly. He is trying to lose weight, but not in a healthy way. He will eat only one meal a day sometimes, or spend a few hours a day in the gym. I keep trying to explain that he cant go about it that way, but he doesnt want to hear it. I have talked to my mom about it and she thinks he is just insecure. I asked him if hes up to going to counceling but he says no. So really, I dont have any good advice for you since I am in the same boat with no solutions, but I wanted to share so you know you are not alone. Good Luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe you should do some fun activities together. Walking, rollerblading, window shopping, golf.:) This will help him and you lose some weight and hopefully will make him feel that your really the same person that loves him even though your becoming a different person. Build up his confidence. Tell him you want him to be as healthy as your going to be and if the two of you work as a team you'll have the rest of your lives together.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My DH is somewhat overweight, but has been benefitting from my banding. Although I have never commented on his weight (or he, mine) he has commented that maybe he too could stand to lose a few pounds. So, although he has little interest in increasing his physical activity, he has started to eat smaller portions, and his nighttime snacking is certainly reduced. Perhaps over time he will also want to do more things, but I don't advise/suggest he do anything (in relation to food or exercise). He is an adult. If he wants to join me in a morning swim at the Y, or a brisk walk at night, or anything else, he can, but I only ask once and I never comment one way or another.

It is somewhat disturbing to read the number of threads about troubled relationships, jealousy etc. as bandsters take charge of their health and change lifestyles. So far, DH and I have not encountered these issues...I hope this is not our experience!

Edited by tapshoes
Another blasted typo - I really must proof-read!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Goyafigs

      I had VSG 11.20.24 with Miguel Burch, MD Cedars-Sinai and I am 1 month post-op. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • DaisyChainOz

      🥳 Jan 1 2025 - Day 1 of Pre Op, surgery on the 16th! 😬😅
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      Just been waiting until time for my consult with my bariatric surgeon. It's scheduled for Jan 9th. Turns out I won't actually be seeing him. Apparently it'll be with his P.A.             Not sure what to expect. I thought this is where the surgeon would discuss the best surgery option for me. For years I had my heart set on the sleeve, but I've read so many people have issues with reflux - even if they've never had it before - that they've had to be revised to the bypass. I already deal with GERD & take 40 mg of Omeprazole daily, so I started studying about bypass and honestly, it seems like it might be the better choice for me. How can we discuss surgery options if the surgeon is not there?
      What happened at your first consult? Trying to get an idea of what to expect, or maybe I should say, what NOT to expect.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • rinabobina

      I would like to know what questions you wish you had asked prior to your duodenal switch surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×