Why the band means everything to me - also, 3rd bandiversary

[giveyouthemoon 4]

Hi all. I haven't been on these boards a lot lately, I admit. Been off running around doing, ya know, what banded people do when they've had surgery. Feel good, have a life and just live.

I celebrated my third bandiversary back in June. Three years. Whoa. My how the time does pass. I remember walking around the hospital floor in agony wondering if this band thing was actually going to work.

It was good for me to review the last posts celebrating Year One and Year Two and see what I was thinking on those special dates.

The main reason why I wasn't around much this summer is because I was planning my wedding. I met my love in November after my June surgery in 2005. I'd lost 50 lbs by then and was a lot happier, but still had a long way to go. He didn't care. He liked me like he found me.

I've lost an additional 60 lbs since we met.

I actually have about 20-30lbs I'd like to lose but I'm unsure I will ever get there. I seem to be stuck right around where I'm at and have been working hard at just being ok with that.

I spun out really hard this year and had to seek extensive care for raging bulimia. I'd recovered before the surgery but it came back with a vengeance.

The band is a blessing, but as a bulimic, it's also a partner in crime. It's oh so easy to PB. I admit it. It's a wrong use of the band.

But for the grace of a really good therapist and some medication, I've come back from the dead, literally and am healthier. I may never make goal, but I'm a hell of a lot better (meaning mentally and physically healthier) than I was.

And on my wedding day (August 10th) when I actually *felt* beautiful (I *never* actually feel beautiful), I took a brief moment to thank my band for being there for me. I've abused it terribly and have a lot of making up to do with my band I call Trink. But she's still with me, still works and I'm incredibly grateful that I was able to have the surgery.

Truly life changing.

So, just to brag a bit...here's a photo of me on my wedding day.

The band isn't a fix all. The band makes you face those demons you wish weren't there. The band isn't magic. It takes work. But if you work the band, the band works for you (for most people...I know plenty who have conditions that make it not work).

If anyone asks me "would you do it again?" I'd say HELL YES! Best thing I ever did for myself.

So hello again to all my banded friends. I'm running the race with you.

If you're newly banded, stay focused! That's my best advice.

If you're an oldster like me. Well, I have no good advice other than the rules they gave us on the day of surgery still apply.

Much love to all on the board!

[Kat817 19]

You made a beautiful bride, congrats on the wedding and on your bandiversary!!! Continued health and happiness!!!

Kat

[giveyouthemoon 4]

Thank you, Kat817!!!!

[beth443 0]

Words can not describe how beautiful you look. Congrats on the band success and the wedding

[HeatherO 7]

What a stunningly beautiful picture . . . and I love the background. I am so happy you are feeling so well at 3 years out. Thank you so much for sharing your story . . . and it was so nice to see how you were feeling at 1 year and 2 years out as well. Congratulations.

[giveyouthemoon 4]

Thank you beth443 and HeatherO!!

Still hard to believe it's been three years. In so many ways, I still feel like a newbie at this.

[Donna113 2]

Karen, 2 words. Simply Gorgeous!

[srknepler 0]

Thank you for sharing your story....and your beautiful picture.

You made a gorgeous bride!! Congrats, on being happy, and healthy!

[Mischievous1 6]

And on my wedding day (August 10th) when I actually *felt* beautiful (I *never* actually feel beautiful),

Moon, You are VERY beautiful, inside and OUT! I applaud your willingness to accept your demons and constantly work on making your life better. I know people who live with bulimia and swear they are "better" yet never went to therapy and/or tried any sort of program, in my heart I know they are in denial and are getting better at hiding it. It breaks my heart to see someone in so much pain when life can be so rewarding and full. You are a great example of someone who wants to find that richness in life and aren't afraid of working hard to get there, kudos to you, I wish you the greatest of success and happiness. Renee

[Laurinda 1]

WOW what a wonderful and inspiring story! Thank- you for sharing and Congrats on your 3 years and your wedding! You look amazing and so very happy!!!

[giveyouthemoon 4]

Dionna113, srknepler and Laurinda - gosh, thank you for your kind words. I'm both blushing and getting kind of teary eyed over here!! Ya'll rock!

Mischievous1 - you know, actually saying the words "I'm a bulimic" out loud for the first time was one of the hardest things I've ever done. The secrecy is all part of the eating disorder. The "I'm all right" perfectionist face is hard to overcome. It's a lot of hard work, and slipping back into it was horrifying to me.

And you're right, I've learned the only way to truly step beyond it is with the help of professionals.

[tapshoes 2]

What a fabulous post! It is nice to read the successes of bandsters who are past the 'honeymoon' stage, and who remain successful years out. I applaud your success, and wish it for myself.

Your wedding photo is lovely; you were indeed a beautiful bride! My sincere best wishes for a long and happy marriage.

[giveyouthemoon 4]

Thanks tapshoes!! (great username, btw!)

I remember when I first got the band, I wished I could see more folks who had been banded for a while. In that first year, the thought of being out at year 3 was hard to believe!

It's still a crazy ride but still TOTALLY worth it for me.

[KimInMD 1]

Moon,

Best wishes on your wedding. Honestly, you look like you are glowing in your photo. What a stunning bride you made! Thank you for sharing your story with us (the good and the bad). I am sure you are an inspiration to many here on the board. I wish you a lifetime of happiness.

Kim