I need some anger management!

[Hollie519 1]

Well yea, I mean I had someone ask me why i needed to resort to surgery. he said why don't you just stop eating and go to the gym. DUH! Don't you think i've tried that. lol i wish people only knew the difference between lap band a bypass. I chose lap band because the results come from the work i put into it. I know my mother is my underlying problem with why I think this way. i have had so many years of counseling because my dad was an alcoholic but that was never my problem. My mom is. She fills my brain with her thoughts and than i get confused. I mean you guys should see the hives that have been on my arms for the last 2 months. I'm so itchy all the time. I can't wait to start counseling. At least this time, i'll be able to go by myself and focus on me and not my mom.

[MissMaryAnn 0]

Hollie- I mean this gently, but I think you might want to take a look and see if you have any judgemental thoughts towards people who have the gastric bypass surgery. They don't have an easy road, either. We're not better people for having chosen the Lap Band, just like naturally effortlessly thin people aren't better than we are for having good genetic luck. If I'm misreading your posts, then I apologize; but I feel like we as Lap Banders (well, I'm hoping to be a banded) need to be careful not to judge anyone else for the choices they make on their own journeys.

We all know the pain of being treated poorly because of our weight, so in my opinion, we're all in this together, regardless of how we choose to find a solution. :tt2:

I really enjoy your posts here and I think you're a great contributor to the board.

[MissMaryAnn 0]

Oh, and I get red, itchy hives when I'm under stress, too! I find that taking just barely warm showers instead of hot ones, using Cetaphil (or the Target/Wal Mart versions that are cheaper), using unscented "free and clear" laundry detergents and avoiding fabric softener (no Downy scent, sob!), and using a fragrance-free hypoallergenic moisturizer all over really helps.

[Hollie519 1]

thanks for your input. i think i am very judgemental period. i don't mean to be. I really don't, but it comes from my mom. I have always been compared to natuarally thin people. i have always belittled my talent of being able to learn very quickly. I never studied a day in my life and graduated with honors. The last math class i took was Honors Pre-cal and i would have gone on to calculus had it not been for the lap band. I have always been a loyal and trustworthy person but like I said, my mother was actually the one who belittle the things that were special about me first. As a young child, i picked up on it and thought that was the way i was supposed to be. I don't mean it to sound offensive to anyone and I am trying to head down the path of change. I feel like what others take as me being judgmental is really me judging myself. I compare myself to everyone and really wish I knew how to not do that. Its damaging to my self-esteem massively. I am trying to be a more open minded person and learn to accept myself.

thanks again for your input. Every word gives me a realization about myself. Much needed realizations.

[Hollie519 1]

And about the hives, I've tried everything. They have not gone away for the last 3 months. They dont' just leave and resurface they are just there. I went to the doctor. I had my house sprayed. I thought it was bugs first. My boyfriend deosn't have one bump and the itchiness from stress runs in my family. I go to see a psyciatrist on Wednesday. Hopefully I will be able to get something perscribed so they will go away. i have anxiety as it is.

I'll keep you posted.

[shadowland 0]

What did you mean when you said fatty liver? and had to have another surgery date?

[MissMaryAnn 0]

I think that when we grow up being constantly compared to others, that's how we learn to value ourselves. In high school I was considered very smart and I based my self-esteem on that; when I got to college, I didn't stand out anymore and I was devastated because my whole self image had been built on that one thing.

I didn't think you said anything offensive at all, hon. I've got to say that you certainly seem to have a good head on your shoulders and a lot of insight into your background and how it has impacted your feelings. Your journey is just beginning and I think you're making an awesome start.

[flowers 0]

Almost all the by pass folks I know gained it all back and then some. With the band we can go get another fill and adjust things, they cant. They cant eat rich Desserts without getting sick and cant have certain alchoholic drinks, its no panacea either to have by pass.

People do think all weight loss surgeries are the same, I admit I didnt know the difference either until quite recently lol. So, Im one you would be angry with.

I had someone ask me when I got to goal, if they take out the lapband then?? Like its all over, once you lose you dont need any help maintaining?

.... to be honest, just being on a diet, makes me a little cranky.

[Hollie519 1]

Yea lol I have to have mine for 5 years but I think I will keep it until i know my mind can control itself with food. Probably not until after I have kids and than some years. I'm terrified to gain it back.

[Snowgator 3]

Just to set the record straight - the RNY surgery is no easy ticket to weight loss. My best friend had it in June, and it has been no picnic. She has all the same struggles that I read about here on LBT and more. I think we should support everyone who chooses the right kind of WLS for themselves.

[Nanook 2]

My daughter had the RNY last May 2008 and has lost over 100 lbs so far and I got my lap band in August of 2007 and gained back most of the weight within months of being banded. I could be envious of my daughter but she's my daughter, my blood and what makes her happy, makes me happy! Like the poster before me it has not been an easy ride for her either and part of the reason she has lost so quickly was due to a stricture and tomorrow will be in the hospital again for a second endoscopy.

I think you have a lot to be thankful for. You're young, you live in probably one of the nicest areas of the country and you've done very well on the lap band from what I can see as it doesn't work well for everyone so count you blessing and you'll be happier!! Nancy.:biggrin:

[lessme 0]

I don't mean to go off thread but Nanook, how did you gain back the weight. Can you go in for another fill to readjust your restriction or did something happen with your band. I don't mean to pry, I'm just interested.