depressed

lelafox · July 27, 2008

Hello to all,

My name is Lela and I had lapband surgery on June 17 of this year. I started off great losing 18 pounds before my first fill. Right before my first fill, approximately one week before, I went to DC for a convention. I tried really hard to monitor my food intake and thought I did a pretty good job of it. Well, when I returned home I had gained 8 of the 18 pounds that I had lost. I now feel like I have failed at this and cannot seem to get back on track. I feel depressed because this is typical in my history of weight loss trials and tribulations. I was motivated and had started walking (more than I ever have!) and now that I am in this state, I can't get motivated to do anything. Every waking day I am starting my diet over and by the end of the day, have blown it. Everyone that has supported me is surprised that I am standing still. I started at 265 and my goal is to lose 100 pounds which at his point seems impossible!

Choromom · July 27, 2008

Lelafox,

You have NOT failed at this! You need to go in and get a fill, and get back on the correct eating plan. This is not a solution - it is a tool, and if you aren't going to use the tool it won't be able to help you. So, let it help you!

Use you convention experience as a tool, too. Let it help you, and us, realize that we can sometimes be wrong in our 'eyeball' estimate of how much food is in a serving. That's a good lesson learned, and now we go from there!

You have not failed until you quit trying! You've been doing this for five weeks, and it is a lifetime experience. It appears to me that you are being too hard on yourself. You are expecting permanent changes in a temporary time frame.

So get back in the swing of things, and get serious about this again. You CAN do it - you were successful 18 pounds worth! Do what you did then...

And know that I'm cheering for you. You are a month ahead of me in band time, and I KNOW you are going to make this work!

ThinknHealthy · July 27, 2008

Lelafox

Like me, you're just starting on this journey. You know when you take your walks, you probably have to walk some hills before you get to the end. Those hills can be steep and hard but you have to keep walking to get to your goal. Remember, those hills eventually reach a peak and then you start going down. Just keep trucking up and working hard and when it seems you can't make it any further do it anyway and soon it will feel like a breeze. Be grateful for those hills because they make you stronger and more ready to tackle the next one.

Vacations and minor weight gains are just a blip in the whole weight-loss journey. In a year, when you've reached your goal, you'll realize that. You'll be the one encouraging others on this site to keep on fighting and working through those difficult times.

I've got a couple of trips coming up in the next couple of weeks and I'm not going to stress over it. If I gain a little, that's just the way it goes. Vacations are so difficult because you lose a certain amount of control, your routine changes, and your body probably is responding to the change in diet.

You know, last week I was a little depressed because I didn't lose any weight for the first time, but this week I lost 6.5 lbs! I just had to remind myself what the rules were and follow them.

Good luck to you. I've sent up a little prayer for you.

mickey123 · July 27, 2008

So sorry to hear you're feeling down. I can relate to the new diet each day, and you really, in my opinion, have the right idea. Each day is a new beginning, and even though you may feel like you fail each day, you are not a failure, because each day, you re really trying. Perhaps you might need to go back to basics. Go back to your discussions with your dietician and your psychologist. That info is your foundation. And even though you my have gotten off track a little, the foundation is still sure. And, most of all, forgive yourself! Give yourself another chance. You deserve it!:teeth_smile:

wsw27 · July 27, 2008

You have to give yourself permission to not be perfect. I was banded July 1 and am really just starting to understand how to eat with the band. I've been afraid to progress off mushies to real food, but I realize that I must take the plunge. Most of us who have been banded or who are considering the band, have started a new diet everyday or every Monday, for many years. I am trying to break the habit of "diet thinking" and trying to look at this as a new lifestyle and not a "diet" in which I somehow end up defining myself as "bad" or "good".

Okay. You gained 8 pounds. You didn't gain 18! Look at the positive side. Then usse the band as a tool, and you will lose 8 pounds and probably some more.

Oftentimes, I find that if I start exercising, better eating habits follow. This is true for me both before and after the band. Try it. You may find that it works for you too.

Don't use this as an excuse to give up on yourself or your "journey" as so many members here call it. Read the posts and get support from the people here.

One final thought--does your doctor offer support groups? You may find that a regular support group will help you deal with small set backs in a more productive way. Good luck to you and hang in there.

daisybug · July 28, 2008

Hi Lela,

It's VERY common to gain weight after surgery and PRIOR to your first fill. Please don't beat yourself up! Vacation is so tough.

Don't let anyone else's comments about your weight change your determination and self worth. YOU CAN DO THIS !

GOOD LUCK :teeth_smile:

278/228/180

Edited July 28, 2008 by daisybug

MsScorpio67 · July 28, 2008

DO NOT LET THIS SET BACK, MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU FAILED!!!!!!:thumbup:

As I'm sure you have heard, you didn't gain this weight over night, yadda, yadda, yadda.

This band is such a learning process. And it takes a while to get the hang of it. Don't beat yourself up. And plus you know where you went wrong. You made the best choices you could make given the circumstances. Give yourself a chance to enjoy life and then get back on track. You have proved to yourself that you could lose the weight and you hadn't even gotten your fill yet. Hang in there.:teeth_smile: