Hey ladies

[aprilapple 1]

Thanks girl. So is "Senator McCain, what's your boggle?" an appropriate way to use the term? lol

[2nd chance 0]

To the original post....

Congrats on your weight loss...continue to work it!

I was having the same problem with my photo.

Got into your control panel of your profile and go to change avatar and upload your pic there...it will then display. You probably posted as I did where they indicate to post your photo; this is not linked to your avatar--which displays when you post.

Best wishes.

Sheena

[DivaStyleCoach 89]

Congrats and Welcome, Miss Rach!

I can't wait until I'm banded and I can post positive updates like yours. Looking forward to seeing your smiling face when your photo is uploaded. Nice to have another sista on the boards.

For pattygreen - please don't be offended by the fact that women of color have CHOSEN to "band" together for support. As saninbham said, there are issues around weight and weight loss that are PARTICULAR to women of color, so that is what we choose to discuss here. It's not meant to exclude or offend anyone - and if you are offended or feel excluded, it's on YOU not us.

I for one was THRILLED to find this thread - because there ARE issues I feel much more comfortable talking with my sistagirls about than other folks on the boards - we have common ground.

I'm hoping you understand, but if you don't - simply don't visit this part of the site - then you won't have to be upset...

[saninbham 0]

Thanks girl. So is "Senator McCain, what's your boggle?" an appropriate way to use the term? lol

Yeah, its another way of saying whats your problem or do you have a problem.

[theninside 0]

Wow. Personally every forum that I went to before this one was a white only forum, It just didnt have that label. It ok for me to post in a forum, where I am the minority, that doesn't address some of the cultural issues associated with obesity, or even the physical healing which is drastically different with monirity womenm but as soon as I come to a forum where I can share experiences about keloids, and have someone related. Then were are in so many words racist.

I gonna leave this alone because I think april apple responded appropriately, and I may do be so eloquent in the face of ignorance.

[theninside 0]

Congratulations Miss Rach!!!, and welcome. Wish you all the best meeting your weight goal. This is a really positive forum and you can find a lot of information for many different issues on fills, restriction, etc. Please share your experiences too.

[pattygreen 5]

wow, is right. I left it alone (as you said) a long time ago. But you insist upon making a big deal about it. Where do you find every forum in LBT a white only forum? These LBTs are for ALL races. And, I NEVER called you a racist! (Go back to my original post.)

For ebonyrose: I don't feel offended in any way. I am not racist. I love people of every color. I have 2 daughters of color, and a few family members as well, and my sister in law is a black woman. I am white. THIS was not my gripe. My gripe was that if all those other posts (that Theninside claims to have visited and siad they were for white people only) were named 'White women only' it might offend some woc. So, my gripe is with your Forum title. Period.

[saninbham 0]

wow, is right. I left it alone (as you said) a long time ago. But you insist upon making a big deal about it. Where do you find every forum in LBT a white only forum? These LBTs are for ALL races. And, I NEVER called you a racist! (Go back to my original post.)

For ebonyrose: I don't feel offended in any way. I am not racist. I love people of every color. I have 2 daughters of color, and a few family members as well, and my sister in law is a black woman. I am white. THIS was not my gripe. My gripe was that if all those other posts (that Theninside claims to have visited and siad they were for white people only) were named 'White women only' it might offend some woc. So, my gripe is with your Forum title. Period.

Then what should the forum be titled so that women of color can come and share and get support from others with like issues and not have to search the whole forum to find them? I know that it is politically correct to want everyone to be the same, however, there are differences between the races just like there are differences between sexes--sorry but that's the way it is. Should the men not have their own also, are they sexist.

Now to try to give you a understanding of what she meant by "white only" forums, consider the magazine Cosmopolitan. Although it can be purchased by anyone, has various topics that all women can understand, it is rare for them for focus on topics that are specific to African American Women. Because of this, it is very difficult for us to relate to many of the things they talk about. This is the reason Essence is considered our Cosmo. Cosmo is not white only in theory, however, in it's practice of not reaching out to us, it is. That does not mean that we don't suscribe or enjoy, it just means that the topics are not really trying to reach us. They say it is because African American women don't buy the mag, however, it's a catch 22. Things like this are so difficult to help non African American people understand because you can pretty much read any magazine because they are pretty much all written for you to enjoy, however, to see faces that look like me, talk like I do and understand my day to day, I have to go to a race specific place. If you don't believe me, next time you get your Cosmo, thumb through and look for African Amercian models. I know this is difficult to understand and it seems like we are being seperatist-but we are not, we are using the option of having a sub-forum for support just like everyone else, oh wait, then that makes us equal to all other sub forums. I read, post and enjoy most of them, and they have been so helpful and informative, however when I want a forum that specifically mets my needs, I come here. Question--do you have a problem with the gay and lesbian forum. What reasons do they have to have a seperate forum. What is it about their lifestyle that they should have their own forum and we should not? Once again, it did not say African American forum, it says women of color. Now you can take that to be a positive and say that white is a color also, as I said earlier, and join, or continue to be upset about the name. And once again, what should the forums' name be in your opinion?:Dancing_biggrin:

PS--Did you know that my doc did not want me to have lap banding because I am African American. Studies show we don't lose as much weight and have a harder time than our caucasian counterparts. He wanted me to have GB. Now, who do you think needs the most emotional support from someone who understands exactly what I am going through, can you understand what I am going through??

Edited October 21, 2008 by saninbham

[DivaStyleCoach 89]

saninbham - You are eloquent, persuasive and absolutely right!:wub::wub::wub:

I love the fact that my sistas of color are here for me. I love the fact that this and all of the other sub-forums exist - I am a member of the Fabulous 40's forum, a geographic-centered forum for those of us in Connecticut, and I'll soon be a member of a date-specific forum because I just got my band date in November!!!:Dancing_biggrin::biggrin::party::biggrin::crying:

I don't see it a seperatist to have different forums for different "interest" groups - and it is a shame if anyone sees the different groups as seperatist for ANY reason...not just the obvious one of race. I'm not going to repeat what saninbham said - she said it beautifully.

Just wanted to co-sign, agree and give her a virtual high-five and an AMEN!:wub:

[aprilapple 1]

I cosign that as well ladies. I would also like to add: we welcome any positive advice or input that will help us on this journey!

Now with that said : how are the scars looking? Mine didnt keloid but they are dark. The staple marks make them look worse. I have some natural shea butter I just have to commit to using it everyday.

[*slim* 2]

Now with that said : how are the scars looking? Mine didnt keloid but they are dark. The staple marks make them look worse. I have some natural shea butter I just have to commit to using it everyday.

It looks like 2 of my 5 are going to keloid including my port incision. That sucks. Where did you get your shea butter? I have only seen it in lotions, but not sold alone.

[aprilapple 1]

You can find it at the a beauty supply store (one that caters to umm..women of color-see why this forum exists? lol) Or an African vendor. The raw butter has a very nutty smell it is thick and yellow. Sometimes a vendor will sell it mixed with an oil to scent it but the unscented is ok. I just put on a scented lotion afterwards. Hope this link help!:grouphug::thumbup:

Buy Bulk Wholesale 100% Pure and Unrefined African Shea Butter: The African Store.

[2nd chance 0]

Re: scars.

My scars were dark. My new scars from band removal look better than my initial scars. I initially thought that the thickness of 2 of my scars were keloid; however, when I consulted with my doctor, he was adamant that it was not keloided. He stated that it was an adhesion. This is a natural occurrence of how the body begins to heal itself. It is a thick internal scar tissue formed at the incision site.

Through this band removal process, my mother had me using a heating pad following my an ice pack :eek:and Mederma on my new incisions. I can tell you that I see a world of difference :thumbup:between the new and old scars and the feel of the old scars. Specifically, the old scar (port placement scar) was the thickest, even after the removal, it is not as thick anymore, just darkest. The new scars are no longer thick, nor are any of them dark. :pray2: If I so choose, I should be able to easily wear a 2 piece and not look bullet ridden!:grouphug:

Best regards!

Hope this information can help, as it is a relevant woman of color issue!

[pattygreen 5]

and this post couln't have been spoken about on any other site that wasn't entitled 'women of color'? I thought white was a color?

[yettia1031 1]

I was reading this thread and it amazed me on so many levels. All I can say is "WooSaaa" And let it go, please. It was only a matter of time, right? April, so that it is possible for you to appease "EVERYBODY" maybe you should really consider changing the name to "Women of All Colors." Yeah right girl, U know that I am joking. Is it really that serious, that someone felt the need to address the name of group. :out:Obviously the name of the group attracts many, and we are all glad to have them all, aren't we? Peace:grouphug: