Help!!! Have i failed???

[Jorge52876 0]

Hello my name is Jorge and I live in Queen Creek, Arizona. I am 32 years old and I weigh 499 lbs, thats if I havent gained all my weight back. I got my lap band surgery on May 12 2008 and I went down from 537 lbs to 499 the week before my surgery. Even after my surgery I was doing good with my preop and postop liquid and soft food diet stages, until about the 3rd or 4th week when I was able to eat regular foods now I am out of control. My food addiction has kicked in. I was supposed to go for my 1st fill on June 25 and I keep postponing because I am so embarrased to go and I feel like I have truly gained some of the weight back. Has this happened to anyone else??? I have alot of weight to loose...my doctor said that my ideal to loose would be 250-275 lbs...so I have a long way to go...and with this setback I am so embarrased to go to my doctors office and get weighed. I have even tried to do crash diets but they don't work!!! I am a carbs addict and I just feel like a total failure!!!...The whole reason for getting this surgery was to loose the weight and feel good physically and emotionally...right now I just feel crappy and emotionally like a total failure...Am I the only one that this happened to??? Is there anyone that has had this happen to as well??? Should I feel like this???

[kansascase 0]

It is my opinion that most doctors don't expect much weight loss until after the first fill. My appetite has increased as well and I am in the 4th week. I am going to have to fight to keep from gaining weight. I wouldn't worry about the doctor's office right now. I would just try not to gain any more - go back to your high Protein diet to help control your hunger and remember most weight loss is really a mental process. Why are you eating too much? Boredom? Anxiety? Depression? Don't ever quit! Go see your doctor - you will feel so much better. If you are afraid to face him, call the office and talk to his nurse and share your concern. When you start getting your fills, you will lose your appetite again and your pouch will not allow you to eat too much. Go easy on yourself. There will always be up and down days and maybe weeks.

[gadumplin 1]

Hey Jorge,

I am only 6 weeks out and just had my first fill. I too thought about not going for my fill cause I could eat, and I was eating way to much. Then I remembered the reasons for going through the surgery. The need to be healthy is much more desirable for me than to have all the food I want. My Doctor had told me I would likely gain in the time from my surgery to my first fill, so yours is probably not going to be surprised. I'm sure on our journey we are gonna come up wtih lots of excuses and embarresment serves as a good one. The time to go get your fill is NOW!!! The longer you postpone the more weight you are likely to gain and the harder it will be to start over. Every day is a new day that God has given us...so make the call to your surgeon, straighten your shoulders and march in and get your fill. YOu will be right back on track and the weight will come off. Take care and Good luck.

[Lizalee 1]

Jorge,

Go back to the doctor and get another fill! It may take several to get to a point where you have enough restriction to be able to USE the band as your weight loss tool.

Yes, you will need to get your desire for carbs under control. But that is MUCH easier when you are not hungry, and can eat only a limited amount of food.

Your doctor only wants you to be successfull = so get in there and get another fill, and as many as you need to stay on track. You can do this. Saying you're embarassed is really only an excuse...If you are serious about losing the weight, you need to make an appointment and get in there. If your doctor thinks badly about you...who cares?

Then, get rid of those tempting carbs. Throw them out. Donate them. Just get rid of them! Get rid of all the junk food in the house - nobody needs them.

Then, start tracking every morsel you put in your mouth. Face what you are doing up front. This is what I do and it helps me face reality, and realize when I've slipped in something extra -- it DOES add up. I use the free daily plate website. It is important to follow the diet instructions you were given - Protein first, then veggies and fruits. When you have good restriction, you'll be too full to eat more. Eliminate the breads, pastas, potatoes, etc.

You've got the tool to success sitting inside you right now. But only YOU can decide to use it.

Not trying to be harsh...but this WILL work if you seek the support you need from your dieitian and physician, and if you stick to the rules.

I didn't have as much to loose, but 6 months ago I never would have believed that I could have lost this much already. It's already changed my life - diabetes meds are gone, only 1/2 a BP pill, choelsterol med gone, feeling great, able to walk miles! This from a person who's diabetes was getting to the point of needing to add a third medication or insulin! I panicked at the thought of walking around the block and was winded walking up a flight of stairs. Now, I feel great. And I'm almost halfway to my goal. I loved food as much as anybody on this site - took me a year to make the decision that I could give up overeating. But it was the best thing ever! I don't miss all that food at all.

You've already taken the most important step getting the band...whatcha waiting for?

[tdsanders 0]

Mind you, I'm not a doctor...but I think that waiting 6 weeks for your first fill is way too long. Maybe that's why my doctor does first fills at 3 weeks post op...because that's about the time you get to the point where your appetite is coming back and you have no restriction. I'm 7 weeks post op now and am going back tomorrow for fill #3. And even after 2 fills I feel like I'm still working from sheer will-power and not band restriction.

Go get that fill and it'll be like a mental victory if nothing else.

Good luck!

[Shalee04 7]

The first 6-8 weeks after surgery is a Healing time for the stomach.

remember the band is a tool for us to work with, not a magic cure all. You should get to your Dr. to get your fill so you will be able to work with your tool. Good luck to you Jorge

[Mrs J.J 2]

Hope you are able to get through your inner struggle and go get your fill. No one said this was going to be easy, but hey you have gone through the major part and that was having the band fitted. You have your tool, now you just have to learn how to work it.

Good luck!!

[Cherlita 0]

Jorge,

I am a carb addict.

I feel your pain. I started my journey at 379. I've lost down to 337 and now, for the last 2 months, I've pretty much been stuck in the 330's. I haven't been able to get below that.

I struggle everyday with my carb addiction.

Everyday life is difficult. I've been working to change my habits and re-learn and focus on the good things in life that are not food related.

I've also been getting counselling to help me relearn living life. My entire life has revolved around food, especially carb laden food. My therapist has been helping me change my habits.

#1: carry no cash or credit/debit cards with you when going out. You cannot buy any food without money. This has really helped me with my fast food addiction.

#2: eliminate any foods in your home, office, car, that are not on good for you. I do not even have any sugar or flour in my house, so I cannot make anything bad either

#3: plan meals and make a grocery list for shopping.

#4: take a shopping buddy with you to the grocery store who will help you stay honest. Don't rely on them to be the diet police, that is not the point. You need to learn to live with the temptations that are all around you. The food will always be there. The key is learning to live with the temptations.

#5: Stop watching live TV. Record the programs you really want to watch and watch them at a later time. This eliminates the constant food commercials (food porn, as I refer to them :thumbs_down:. My brain is so tied to visual cues that seeing all the food commercials can trigger me.

#6: Add exercise to your daily routine. I have purchased an exercise ball to sit on, and yes, there are exercise balls that support our weight. I sit on it every day. I have a desk job and sit 8-10 hours a day. I also have exercises my therapist gave me yesterday, to start working more muscles and help me get stronger.

#7: seek counselling from a Bariatric Surgery focused therapist. I started this right after I got surgery because I know myself and I know that old habits return to me in a split second.

#8: The lapband is a tool not a cure. You have to learn to use the tool to your advantage.

I had my first fill at 6 weeks postop. My surgeon explained that they wait in order to make sure patients heal properly. He also will not do more than one fill per month. I see him tomorrow and will ask for another fill. I'm very close to good restriction. I can still eat more than I think I should and am hungry between meals.

Go to your surgeon. The bariatric surgeons know we have food issues. Start your new journey of finding restriction with your lapband.

Best of luck and keep posting. We are here for you.

Cherlita

379/337/180

banded Nov 27, 2007

[MrsFlipFlops 2]

Go Go GO to the DOCTOR! :tongue_smilie: I say that with all the care I have in my heart. Don't compare yourself to others. The doctor's have a lot of patients and have seen some people lose like crazy and some people lose a pound a month. The fill will help you. It may take several fills. I'm on fill 4 (? maybe 5) and I'm still needing to go in. I can eat SMALL quantities of bread and for a carb addict like you (and me) it SO helps with the cravings because one bite and I KNOW I can't eat anymore.

Cherlita- food porn! I LOVE it!

[tricia-j 1]

I hope by now you've talked yourself into going for the fill. I too was dreading it because I knew I had gained weight after getting back to solid food. But my doctor was very kind and I'm happy to report I went for my second fill yesterday and had lost some pounds.

I just wanted to suggest you might consider going to Overaters Anonymous to help you with the support you need to fight your food addition and use your band to your best benefit. Good luck and don't give up!

[kansascase 0]

Hey guys, I am running into trouble. I had my surgery on June 4th and have had 1 fill. I am about due for my second one but I find that I can eat too much and I am fighting hunger. I've followed the Protein rules and discovered that Fiber does help to keep you full. I think I am also in a plateau. It has been a couple of weeks since I lost anything. I added a few carbs to my diet - was trying not to eat any but I needed some Fiber. I still limited my carbs. I don't believe that I am overreating but nothing is coming off. I've tried to incorporate some of the South Beach products as they are full of nutrients, high Protein, low carb and fiber and that is pretty much what my nutritionist recommended.

What is going on and how do I break this? I've been tempted to try something like Dexatrim or some other over the counter product. I am not too happy right now and wonder if I have done something wrong. I've been on a lot of diets in my life but I expected that this lap band would be a great tool and I just don't seem to be getting much assistance from it.:cursing:

[Lizalee 1]

Hey,

We all go through this!! Three---four weeks of not loosing, despite following all the rules, etc. I am not sure what the deal is, but everybody says it's your body adjusting, etc. I believe it's your body's way of adjusting to sudden weight loss -- it's like -- whoa -- we got to stop this before we starve to death!! (Seems to forget all those fat stores hanging around.)

This too shall pass...and all of the sudden you loose 4 or 5 pounds in a week....and then, bam, another week or two of not loosing.

The other thing is - you're not at your sweet spot - enough restriction to curb the hunger, and not too much that you're unable to eat/swallow liquids. I'm not either. I've had really 2 fills - my second one lasted only a couple days. Sure, it's not like before the band -- but still feel like I can eat too much.

Some of the wise people on another thread reminded me to realy focus on Protein - like filling up on chicken breast, fish, lean ground beef and really avoiding carbs, which creates urges for more carbs. It has worked the past couple days. (for the hunger, not the weight loss...)

Also exercising at least 60 mins a day.

And hanging in there. If you're doing everything right, then you will loose again! For me, that has to be under 1200 cals a day...exercise, and even with that now, I haven't lost in over a week. Go figure.

[kansascase 0]

Thanks for the words of encouragement. I hope this comes to an end soon.

[bandded 0]

I totally felt like that before my first fill i actually gained 2 lbs befor my first fill. DOnt feel bad or embarrsed, try not to be embarrsed, i suppose ur losing weight for urself so go in and get the fill no matter what, if u happen to have a bad month then get a tighter fill thats what i did, my first fill wasnt tight enough so even after my fill i was eating full meals, i couldnt take it and do this to myself any more so after 2 weeks from my 1st fill i went back in and asked my doc for more restriction. its been about a week now and im feeling MUCH better about myself and the hole deal. Im still new to all this i was just banded in june of 2008 hopefully ill be one of those people on this forum saying they lost 75 lbs. DOnt worry, your not alone. whenever i get worried and spas out i rant and post all my problems and fears, people responed and i feel 100 times better. I hope you fell better too.

best of luck too you.

Edited August 11, 2008 by bandded

[lapbandbarb 0]

Wow, you guys are so supportive and encouraging! I have been having a hard time too but trying to keep a positive outlook. After reading all your ideas and encouragement to Jorge, I feel better and feel so lucky to know that you people are there sharing my journey thru lapband hell(I meanweightloss hell).

Jorge, I know it is hard but listen to these people. We all care and want you to succeed. Nothing happens over night. It takes time. If my Dr was not supportive, I would look around for one who was.

Support is so important! Good Luck!