Couch to 5k.....come join me!!

[georgia girl 35]

hehe--g-girl--you said "hanging meat"

sorry flashback to beavis and butthead days!

Video was hysterical! Thanks for sharing!

LOL!!!! I just got a visual of that in my head, LMBO!! I didn't even think about that until you said it!! Hanging meat.....Hahahaha!

Edited August 1, 2008 by georgia girl

[renewedhope 4]

Yall are too funny. The Rocky picture I had in my mind has been forever altered!! LOL

We just got home from date night. We went to Applebee's and then to Hastings. DH looked at gun magazines while I read my Jillean Micheal book, Losing to Win. Very good book. I am halfway through it. It was very nice to read without any little kid distractions. My run really boosted my self esteem. I felt very attractive tonight. A little flirty even. DH and I had a great time. I am going to bed now!

[georgia girl 35]

Glad ya'll had a good date night! DH and I really need to start doing that. We hardly ever get to go out on a real date. Sorry about ruining your Rocky image....but it was pretty funny!

Bonnie~ I showed the video to DH and then showed him your post and he 'bout died laughing. Ya'll crack me up!!

[Guest Leslie2Lose]

Okay - I blame ya'll completely - I've got to add the Rocky theme to my MP3 Player in your honor! I can't get rid of the visual either.

I've got to rant a bit abit about DH. He told me ALL week he was going to the gym with me. Finally he said yesterday he'd go. Last night I'm on the elliptical machine waiting on him (he is 30 minutes late). I see him through the double glass doors, walking by. I get off and run to catch up with him. He turns around and tells me that he's going home. I asked why? He said this isn't his thing and there are too many people in there. I told him we could walk outside or play racquetball or basketball in the gym. He said no - and left. I went out to the bleechers by the tennis courts and cried. I was so upset I didn't finish my workout. I didn't ask him to come or start working out with me. It is something he volunteered to do. I guess I'm on my own. My workout partner is supposed to be back today, so I'm not totally alone.

When I got home I took the kids walking (they rode their bikes). He was mad that I didn't invite him. WTH?

When I spoke with him last night about it I told him I'm sorry if he felt pressured to do something he didn't want to do. He said he wanted to but just couldn't. He was glad that I loved working out and that he loved my new body, but he just couldn't do it. I told him I couldn't make him to it, he'd have to do it when he was ready. I told him I didn't love working out - I sometimes had to make myself do it, but I love the way after I feel when I am done. I haven't pressured or asked him to do anything. I do wish he would workout with me though. I guess I'm upset because I got my hopes built up and he does a good job of crushing them.

When I was getting ready this morning I saw him putting his workout clothes in his bag. I'm not sure what to expect. Am I wrong to expect so much of him?

[SugarBean 0]

Leslie - I am sorry that your DH is not joining/supporting you in your exercise. Some people are just not gym people (me) and are intimidated by all those people who can do much more than they can. Is your DH a little overweight or out of shape? He just might be intimidated by you. You are after all changing and growing (physically and mentally) Talk to him (non-confrontational) when it is not exercise time and ask him your his support. Give him time, he will probably come around.

[Guest Leslie2Lose]

DH has put on about 40 pounds in the last year or so. That's one of the reasons he wanted to go to the gym. He says that he feels like everyone is watching him. I tried to tell him they don't care what he is doing and they aren't even aware of him. He won't listen. It's something he will have to deal with when he is ready. I'm just frustrated with him. He wants to support me and do it - he said that last night.

He wants to get in shape as well. He said this past weekend that he pales in comparrision to me now. Mentioned his growing gut and double chin he didn't realise was there. He just can't take the step to do it. I can understand that part - I looked in the mirror for years and didn't like what I saw. One day it clicked and I knew I had to do something. I wish he had the drive to do it. Either do it or don't...don't promise me and show up (not bothering to even say hello to me) and run away. Maybe I'm being selfish.

[luluc 6]

leslie - i sorta know what your talking about. DH was banded the same day as me, and i took off with exercise immediately. took him 4+ months to follow along with me, but aggrivatingly - he had already just about reached goal (hate men lose faster:frown:). he just got tired of sat/sun mornings me going to the gym by myself & he kinda felt left out. i'm like I'd LOVE for you to join me - but i wont' force the issue. now when he's in town - he ALWAYS goes to the gym w/me, he uses my trainer now & last night he said he feels the best he has in 10yrs.

sorry whosya, but i think men actually are more embarrassed than woman when hitting the gym overweight....at least that would be MO.

keep doing what your doing - i bet he catches up with you, but don't deviate from your plan.

[SugarBean 0]

Your human honey. Just be patient with him and don't let him discourage you. Hopefully he will come around. Keep on keeping on.

[mamato3 1]

aww Leslie - I'm sorry you are upset about your hubby. I definately know how hard that is. Maybe he will come around. Just remind him that his health and well being are much more important then what anybody at the gym might look at him and think (even though they really aren't thinking about him while they are there)

My hubby is the same. I couldn't get him to the gym if I paid him! He had back surgery 2.5 years ago and the surgeon told him then that he needed to lose at least 50 pounds. Well guess what?? He gained! He had his second sugery 2 weeks ago. The surgeon this time told him that he MUST lose weight and if he doesn't he will just be returning again soon and next time he would probably be looking at a fusion. He has been off work for the last 4 months. Do you think he has changed his eating style or tried to add any type of exercise to his life at all? Nope! I fix dinner for my girls and myself and he fixes something totally different for himself.

So, believe me, I understand your frustration! I guess I have just decided to take care of myself and my children and hopefully he is going to jump in with me soon. You can't make anyone do something they don't want to, ya know?

As for you hubby putting his gym clothes in his bag this morning... don't expect anything! Then if he doesn't show up you wont be upset and if he does, well then you get to be pleasantly surprised!

[Kathybad 0]

Leslie... I agree with what everyone else is saying, but have my own twist. I think that we (us here on LBT) are so conditioned for weight loss and exercise as we went through this incredible life changing event to prime ourselves for it. We've asked our significant others/family for their support, and for the most part, we've got their support. So we've pretty much dealt with our inner demons (fear, insecurity, self consiousness, self loathing), and use our LBT support network to deal with them when they pop up.

However, our loved ones are not always prepared for their own inner demons. Sometimes they fear our success will cause others to find us more attractive, and we might stray. Sometimes they have used us as a measure for themselves... "I'm ok as long as I'm smaller/in better shape than Kathy" and when we rock that viewpoint it sends their demons flying. Sometimes we forget that in our own road to success, we have been self absorbed about our needs and don't realize they need our support too.

Leslie, don't pressure him, don't ask him to join you, just do it yourself. When you go for family walks or outings, include him. Help him silently and lead by example. You know that it has to be his choice, otherwise it won't be a lasting change... we've lived that. When he's ready, he will make the change, but forcing him will push him away. Also, be careful on what you expect from him on support. If your success shows him his own failure, then supporting your success will really be hard for him, and he may subconsiously be sabbatoging you... and I mean subconsiously. It is not his fault.

Good luck, this is a hard one to face. Just love him for who he is, because that's what you want from him.

[Kathybad 0]

Georgia... thanks for the video, I loved it! I had forgotten the music from the movie... so will have to add that to my ipod for when I actually complete a really difficult run... like the 20min run :biggrin:

BTW, I now have 2 interviews coming! YEAH! Now if my scales would just start to cooperate, it would be a great day.

DH and I had a date last night. Like Renewed, we always had a weekly date, but had to put that on hold when I lost my job. We would go out every Thur night for some golf and dinner. Last night my niece (wonderful young lady) babysat for free just because she knew we needed a night out, and we went to see the new Batman movie. I had given my DH a movie pass way back in Feb that included the movie and concession... so it was a free night and we needed it!!! Loved the movie, very sad, but lots of action. It was great just to get out without the kids... so important to a relationship!

[georgia girl 35]

Kathy~ Congrats on the job interviews! I hope it works out for you! Let us know how they go.

Leslie~ I also have a hard time with my hubby and exercise. He joined the YMCA over a month ago and do you think he has been? Nope. I've decided I'm just gonna quit asking and hopefully he will step up and take control. He has about 50 lbs he needs to lose. I do think he is starting to see how beneficial exercise has been for me. Just keep doing the best you can and don't stop.

On the other hand, I can understand why he would feel uncomfortable at the gym. I started going to the YMCA when I was 330 lbs. I too felt like everyone was staring. Now that I have lost some weight, I don't feel quite so intimidated. I still don't feel comfortable running on the treadmill there, that's why I run outside. It's getting better and better as I become healthier, so maybe it will just take some time for him to warm up to it. Anyway, ((HUGS)). Hang in there girlie!

[Guest Leslie2Lose]

Thanks everyone for your support. It's nice to have a place to vent where people actually understand. It's like talking to a wall with my friends sometimes. And I don't vent about DH to my family - I just don't go there.

Lyn - I think it's great that your DH finally took that step. It must have been hard on you when you felt you were alone.

Mama - I'm not going to expect him to be there. He's come up with excuses all week. I should have seen that as a red flag. If he comes I'll be happy, if not I'll just go it alone. Alone really doesn't bother me - it just is dissappointing when I expect him and he doesn't show.

Kathy - I agree with you 100%. I think that is exactly what he is going through. Trying to deal emotionally with the changes in me. He's now looking at himself (for the first time he is larger than me) and doesn't know how to deal with it. He wants to make changes in himself and doesn't know how to go about it.

I haven't asked him once to walk or workout with me. It's something he wanted to do. I'm not going to push him though. In time I hope, for his health, that he'll break through his insecurities and make that leap. It's a hard adjustment for both of us though. I'll do my best to be patient (I'm not a patient person by any means).

[lynlynkr 0]

Kathy the words your sent to Leslie is exactly what I was going to say to her. You said it so well, nice job.

Leslie - your DH want to be there with you; but his reluctance is about him. He wants to support you, but it is hard for him to get past his issues. I think you need to let him find his own time and motivation; just as we had to do it in our own time. He sounds like a great guy. You are Blessed. Be patience with him.

As our bodies and self esteem changes so will our relationsships with other people. Believe it or not; we will have to help them through the changes too.

[Guest Leslie2Lose]

Well - now that I've got DH off my chest...thanks again everyone. I have news.

I just went online to active.com and registered for the 5K in November (YMCA Chili Run). It's official and paid for. No backing out! I'm so excited!!!!!