Worried

[Jillbeme65 1]

Ok, I am not at the 40 bmi, I am at 37, I have high blood pressure, HIGH HIGH cholesterol over the 300 the medicine makes my body feel like it has the flu. So the PA I work for said that it is going to have to come down naturally. My weight is 235lb and 5'5" tall...

So going to the orientation on Saturday. Husband is not supportive as of yet, I am very scared. I worry that I will fail at this too.. Then everyone will say look she can't even lose weight with the lap band.

Has any one went in with less. My knees are killing me. My mom is heavy and had both knees replaced, and that tur:confused2:ned out bad... I guess I just don't know what to do...

Any advice, Jill

[newimage 2]

Jill,

Go to the orientation and bring back information for your husband to read. That way you are both aware of the procedure. Remember, the band is a tool and not an instant weight loss gimmick. There will be changes you will have to make and all of them will be for you to get healthy.

Good Luck!!

[PATCHELTON 0]

My BMI was around 37 also. I am 5'7" and weighed 252 at the start of my journey. I also had high blood pressure, high cholesterol, sleep apnea, reflux, knee arthritis. I had to spend 6 months on a documented diet attempt to satisfy insurance (lost 10 lbs). Increased my exercise from Curves to Curves plus walking. I found a nice park with a 2 mile walking path. Started on weekends this past January, and when daylight savings arrived, I increased to almost every day. Most days I walk around twice, which is 4 miles. Pants were getting loose without much additional weight loss. Pre-op liquid diet (was supposed to be 2 weeks, but ended up being 3 because I caught a cold and my surgery was postponed a week, so I stayed on the liquid diet an extra week). I think they put you on this if they think you have a fatty liver, mostly to shrink the liver and make the surgery easier. Anyway, I lost another 25 lbs before surgery. Was banded 3/25/08 and have lost another 35 since surgery.

I think you should be able to get approval. My insurance said BMI 40 and 100 lbs overweight or BMI 35-39 with one or more co-morbidities (the above listed ailments that are affected by excess weight). Instead of worrying about failing, you need to get your head around the fact that you will have to eat differently from now on. I was a little hungry during the day on the liquids, but I expected that. Up until 4 days before surgery I could have a small amount of lean Protein, so I saved that for the evening when I tended to overeat most. I used unbreaded chicken tenders (Costco) and hard cooked eggs. I would have 2 tenders or 2 eggs with salt and pepper, and that helped get me through until morning. Since surgery I tried pizza once but the dough gave me problems, so I invented a crustless pizza (sauce, turkey pepperoni, peppers and onions, Kraft Fat Free Mozarella--put in microwavable dish and heat) since it was the toppings I craved. I tried bread once but it got doughy and sat, so I haven't had bread since, other than croutons, because they disintegrate instead of becoming doughy. Doughy tends to get stuck. Some foods will agree with you, some not. You have to stop drinking 1/2 hour before eating, and not drink for 45 minutes to an hour after eating. What the band does is help control portions. It is still up to you to put healthy stuff in your mouth. It is not a quick fix; your success will depend on how committed you are to working with it. I have never been able to lose a significant amount of weight before. Now I have lost 70 lbs and my goal is 100. I have hit a plateau and have made an appointment for a fill. My doctor is away until July so guts and determination are in play between now and my appointment. I have gone down 2 sizes in work clothes (scubs) from 2x to large, and the pants are loose almost to my needing a medium, but my waist an stomach aren't there yet. I am tickled pink. I even colored my hair last week. First time in 30 years or so.

Good luck on your journey. Come here for some support and if they offer a support group where you will have your band done, please go, even now. I have been going to support group meetings since last July. You will learn a lot and meet people at all stages of pre and post op. Find out about the Vitamins and Protein drinks recommended. Try different ones now and see what you like instead of waiting until surgery. Some bariatric sites sell sampler packs. I got some and tried them. Read everything you can about the band. Obesityhelp.com is another good site with lots of information.

Sorry to run on so, but I wanted to give you some information to get started with. You can do it.:smile2:

Edited June 18, 2008 by PATCHELTON

[MyDay2Shine 1]

Hi Jill, I have not started the approval process yet. My bmi is 41 right now, but it bounces around from 38-41. My only other health problem is infertility/multiple miscarriage. I don't even have a family history of obesity. I'm going to my orientation in 2 weeks. I'll see how it goes. Do you mind if I ask in what ways your husband is not supportive? My husband is supportive (he wants a baby so much), but my Mom is NOT supportive at all. It's to bad too because we are very close. I know she is not supportive because every time I try to talk about lap band she changes the subject or walks out of the room or has to go do something else. So I'm left wondering, why would she not want this for me?:smile2:

[orea15 0]

Your mom probably thinks it is dangerous. You are precious to her and she is afraid something will happen to you. That would be my best guess. My mom had similar feelings about WLS when she was living. Keep talking, and try to reassure her how very safe this procedure is.

(If she doesn't come around, do it anyway! You deserve to be slimmer and feel better just as much as I do or anyone else does.)

Orea

[flowers 0]

My Dad doesnt know yet and my Mom is totally unsupportive. She says you lost 80 lbs on Nutrisystem last year and put it all back on. What about this?? 10 years from now you say the band will probably fail by then per stats, are you going to have to get these fills for the rest of your life?

My mom has to force herself to eat and weighs less than 100 lbs. My Dad got down to 136 lbs, he couldnt force himself to eat and we had to put him on a feeding tube. Both have prided themselves on being so thin and make really awful comments about fat people. If I say anything she says "cant I have an opinion?" I have a slow sister I told her tonight was discussing someone at the Center and making comments about their weight (who weighed less than I do). I told my mom and instead of recognizing that this is wrong, she launched into how upset she is my sister put on 15 lbs. My 5 7 sister is all of 130 lbs or so.

My support system is nil. I have no one to lean on who understands. My mom says why not just do nutrisystem again? Last time my Dad almost died twice and I had to feed my sister and was dropping in at fast food places and at the rehab where I couldnt eat right and then I broke my shoulder. She says today, well you just admitted you put on the weight when things got stressfull, Im just not convinced this is needed. Someone who doesnt care about food or like it cant understand someone like me who loves to eat and long term facing tempations.

Iv yo yo'ed so many times my skin is all stretched out and I already know I will never look good again, even if I lose the weight and keep it off. But I still need to lose the weight or its going to kill me. I wouldnt know what to do with a supportive family.

[ljv52 2]

Smartie, Yes, your mom is worried about the safety issues. If you could get her to go to the seminar with you that would help her, or even to a support group meeting before you have your surgery. You need to make her comfortable with this procedure and also give her knowledge so she will understand how to be supportive to you also. Of course, if she just shuts down completely and refuses to go with you, then she will come around after your surgery and when you start to have success. Jill - same thing with your hubby! Good luck to you both!

[Telecia 1]

Wow so sorry to hear family not being supportive. Thats hard but sometimes you just gotta do something for you and damn the rest of the world.

jillbeme would he be willing to go to the orienntation with you? Often times once the spouse/mate gets well informed they become more supportive. mine was totally against the idea of surgery untill I started filling him in on the details of the band. Now hes 100% behind me. I even made him watch the Utube video of a lapband procedure.

flowers, oftentimes people who haven't battled weight all their lives just cant *Get it* they haven't gone through the same experiences that come with life as a fat person. So to them Weight loss surgery is a cop out, cheat or easy way out. When those of us who have battled the yo yo scale know isn't so.

Maybe educating her would help too. Who knows. If she not willing them maybe you will have to just tell your doing what YOU think is best and tell her its a no discussion topic.

Smartiegirl, she probably does want whats best for you. At least what she thinks is best. Many times other overweight friends/family members are not supportive because they are jealous, that you might actually succede where they have failed, or because they don't know enough about weight loss surgery options to be educated. You gotta realize MOST people seem to have only heard of the bypass, and they rarely hear the good things. Several people I know who I told I wanted this had never heard of the band past the ocasional tv comercial and had only heard horror stories about bypass patients. So OF COURSE they would be against you having weight loss surgery.

While it is hard to not have a support system with your family it is not impossible to do. Most every surgeon will have support groups, they may not all be banders but don't count them out either, theres this site here which is GREAT. You can build your own support group online and in real life if you just work at it.

Heck after your banded and if you do well you might find that many people will change their minds when they realize your doing well.

But it all comes down to what do you want? Is your health important enough to you to do something about it. Sometimes you gotta just jump in there and grab the bull by the horns and teach it who's boss!! :cursing:

Hmm thats gonna be my new sig. lol

[MyDay2Shine 1]

I agree my Mom probably is worried, but why would she not say so, or ask me questions. I can't help but shake the feeling that she is a little jealous, or worried about things other than just my safety. Like how my lifestyle changes will affect her! I tried to bring surgery up to her again today, I got nothing but silence from her, my husband finaly had to break the silence by changing the topic. I'll be fine, my husband is going with me to the seminar, and he is so supportive, I'm also an educated person. I don't NEED her support, I just WANT her support. She did agree to watch my daughter while my husband and I go to the seminar, so thats a start. Why do I suspect this Journey is going to start bringing up my Mommy issues (ha-ha) Jill, I hope your husband is at least letting you talk about what you are learning about lap band :rolleyes2:

[MyDay2Shine 1]

Flowers, you will feel good again if you lose weight. I know how even a 20 pound loss can make me feel so good! Find support other than your family, find it here, find a support group near your home, find someone who has had WLS to talk with. Have your surgery, then when your looking and FEELING better, your family will be like "Oh we are so glad we helped you make this great choice". (even if they didn't) Ha!

[orea15 0]

It's really sad when the people close to us can't find it in themselves to give us the respect and support we deserve. After a while, as one of my mentors puts it, we have to realize we can't get pizza from a Chinese restaurant. It just isn't there.

Fortunately, we have other places to go, like this one, where we can support and encourage and advise each other. If the people in our lives won't suffice, we can make new friends!

Orea