Anyone else noticed?

[Froggi 4]

I agree wasa totally :smile:

[heartfire 4]

I understand Chickie's frustration. Chickie and Jacqui both warned me that I'd be treated differently after I hit goal and they were right. Not by everyone, of course but many. I've always had patient coordinators on my tail due to my reputation for pushing people to research their doctors and not go to the bad ones but after hitting goal there was a new group on my tail, those that were banded and not doing well with dietary changes and exercise. The patient coordinators that don't want people researching make me laugh, the banded population (below) frustrate me.

I know I am blunt and to the point but you know what? Sometimes it's necessary. Take exercise for example. Not exercising doesn't have a thing in the world to do with our eating issues, it's LAZY! The band doesn't fix lazy. The band doesn't absorb calories, the band doesn't motivate you, the band doesn't do the work for you. There is a certain population of banded folks that seem to have the notion that they will get a band and magically lose weight and that isn't how it works. It's like the population of banded folks that have thyroid issues. Even with thyroid problems you don't get fat by eating broccoli and you don't lose weight by taking thyroid pills. Fat still has to be burned.

There is yet another mindset where some folks feel like, "Great, you lost weight and got to goal but my problems are more severe than your problems and you could change your eating behaviors, I can't." Well, if someone has already decided they can't change and they come up with a list of why they can't change their lifestyle, they have already decided to stay fat. Changing lifestyles wasn't easy for any of us, the band doesn't do it - we do. If you want it badly enough you'll do it. If you want excuses badly enough, you'll find them.

Another population... those that want what they want, when they want it. People today are not great about denying themselves anything they want. They want a big house they can't afford, they buy it anyway. Then when they can't make the payments they blame the economy. They were in over their head the day BEFORE they bought the house, the economy has nothing to do with it. Same thinking applies to food. They are entitled to ice cream, they want it, and they are going to have it. Then they want weight loss, they are entitled to it, and they are going to have surgery. Yet they are still entitled to ice cream. Then they decide the band doesn't work because they are entitled to ice cream. It's okay to deny yourself foods that make you fat.

A lifestyle change does not mean rewarding weight loss with cake. It does not mean planning days to eat crap food. It means getting out there, denying self crap food, exercising, and damn well getting it done. This wasn't easy for any of us, but if we want it bad enough we'll get it done.

When you tell various populations the above they are "ohhh sooo insulted," and suddenly those at goal just don't understand. Quite frankly, we DO understand, that's why we are at goal.

See, Wasa, this is why I love you and Jacqui, Chickie, BBK and several others. B/c you DO tell it like it is. There are times for tough love and times for hand-holding. You all seem to know when someone is just having a tough time and needs some bolstering and when someone just isn't playing by the rules and needs a butt-kicking.

I don't understand why people would send nasty PMs and harass those who've gone before us and can help us in our journeys. I need/want all the help y'all are willing to give. If I need a butt-kicking, I want you guys to be the ones to do it BECAUSE you've been there. You can probably tell where my head is at since yours was probably there at some point as well. If I need a "you can do this b/c we've been able to do this" speech, I want it to come from you guys, again, BECAUSE you've been there!

I want to grow up to be just like y'all!! I don't mean exactly b/c to a certain extent every one of us is going to have different experiences. What I mean is that I want my head in the right place, I want to work this band properly (and I'm scared to death that I'll fail, yet again!), and dammit, I want to get to goal!! So, yea, I want to be just like y'all!

And if someone doesn't like something about another person, why get nasty and send PMs? Just ignore the person! Sheesh! Be an ADULT!!!!

Okay, I'm done now. I think! (And thank goodness for spell-check b/c I can NOT type today! Must be Monday!!!)

[losingjusme 12]

A lifestyle change does not mean rewarding weight loss with cake. It does not mean planning days to eat crap food. It means getting out there, denying self crap food, exercising, and damn well getting it done. This wasn't easy for any of us, but if we want it bad enough we'll get it done.

wasa,

what a great post. i find the above especially true... there is a great need to change the mindset. celebrating does not have to be with food.

you lost 15 pounds??! THAT'S WONDERFUL ... go get some smelly stuff from Bath and Body...

you lost 50 pounds?! FABULOUS - get a pedi from a nice salon.

pamper yourself... take care of yourself... its worth it.

and you didnt mention this but in regards to cravings... if you are really graving something, take a toddler fork and you get ONE BITE. that's all you need....

[PennyLane 0]

I totally agree, Wasa. I was just saying that I hope that the successful veterans don't all get so frustrated by those groups that they leave because otherwise all that's left are the type of bandsters I originally encountered in my research--those who aren't losing, are PBing everything they eat, having complications, claiming it doesn't work, it's hell, it's dangerous etc.

Because this picture was night-and-day compared to how my surgeon had explained it at the info session, I did more research and reading and eventually (after a while) came across those bandsters who do things the way I'd been told it works and have had huge success with it.

I'm still quite a newbie (just over two weeks out) and I'm still shocked when I read about PBing every day, or reading about the types of food eaten (all soft, calorie rich foods that go right through the band) and all that sort of behavior--I can't imagine what it's like once you've been doing this for a while. I was just voicing my hope that not all the successful bandsters would get "run out" due to negativity from certain segments of the board.

Thanks again, all, for your insights!

[ReadySteadyGo 8]

I love love love love your profile pic Pennylane.

[PennyLane 0]

I love love love love your profile pic Pennylane.

Thanks :cry_smile: It's from one of my favorite movies--I like that character.

[ReadySteadyGo 8]

Tangarine? Yeah, I love that movie too, and her character is just perfect.

[areellady 1]

I am in on this one with you guys. Is this where you all hang out if you can't handle reading any more intruductions, like the one today that said...."I didn't realize I would have five scars".....WHATTTTTTTT???????? How much did you really research this???? Its scary, and it gets quite annoying.

[WASaBubbleButt 41]

I am in on this one with you guys. Is this where you all hang out if you can't handle reading any more intruductions, like the one today that said...."I didn't realize I would have five scars".....WHATTTTTTTT???????? How much did you really research this???? Its scary, and it gets quite annoying.

I was talking to someone recently that asked me about banding. She wants to go to a doctor that nobody has ever heard of before, in a trashy little TJ clinic, the doctor speaks NO English, the patient speaks NO Spanish, there is no way for her to communicate her questions to him, there is no way for him to communicate his instructions to her, he has no way to explain the band, how it works, how to take care of incisions. He is not Inamed certified, the person doesn't have the slightest idea what brand of band will be placed.

She doesn't know anything about the band, had no idea she had to chew well, had never heard of PBing, sliming, or foaming. Didn't know she needed maintenance on the band, and asked what a port is.

But she is thrilled because the banding is only $5500 and that's where she wanted to go.

To her credit after we talked for an hour she realized she is nowhere near ready for banding, she has a LOT to learn about bands, life with a band, how to chew, what to eat, how to research ANY doctor regardless of country... she just assumed that since he made it through medical school he must be really good otherwise how would he have graduated? And surely he knows to put a US FDA approved band in her even though he is in MX. ???

Spooky.

[heartfire 4]

I am in on this one with you guys. Is this where you all hang out if you can't handle reading any more intruductions, like the one today that said...."I didn't realize I would have five scars".....WHATTTTTTTT???????? How much did you really research this???? Its scary, and it gets quite annoying.

I read that too. I was a little (a lot!) shocked by that! Then she was asking about what she should be eating. Obviously there wasn't much in the way of pre-op/post-op information given and no research on her part.

I was talking to someone recently that asked me about banding. She wants to go to a doctor that nobody has ever heard of before, in a trashy little TJ clinic, the doctor speaks NO English, the patient speaks NO Spanish, there is no way for her to communicate her questions to him, there is no way for him to communicate his instructions to her, he has no way to explain the band, how it works, how to take care of incisions. He is not Inamed certified, the person doesn't have the slightest idea what brand of band will be placed.

She doesn't know anything about the band, had no idea she had to chew well, had never heard of PBing, sliming, or foaming. Didn't know she needed maintenance on the band, and asked what a port is.

But she is thrilled because the banding is only $5500 and that's where she wanted to go.

To her credit after we talked for an hour she realized she is nowhere near ready for banding, she has a LOT to learn about bands, life with a band, how to chew, what to eat, how to research ANY doctor regardless of country... she just assumed that since he made it through medical school he must be really good otherwise how would he have graduated? And surely he knows to put a US FDA approved band in her even though he is in MX. ???

Spooky.

That is scary! I'm glad you were able to talk to her and she realized where she could be headed with this if she didn't do her research.

[Great2BThin 5]

I had someone PM me and accuse me of drinking only liquids in order to lose so well. And it wasn't worded very nicely. Um, no, I am following the what my dr. calls, 'the rules of the tool', which is eating right, exercising, etc.

[MacMadame 81]

The rules of the tool. That's cute! :w00t:

I had my surgical consult today. I came back with a 35 page booklet on how to eat post surgery (and some stuff on exercise) and a 30 page booklet on WLS in general and a 4 page Pre-op Checklist of stuff I have to do.

Then I hear stories like this and I wonder where these people are going for their surgery!

[areellady 1]

It would seem they hear about the Lapband and then go to the doctor, demand the Band, and THEN decide they should know a little more about it. It is crazy.

WASA, that is a scary story. How many others are out there doing the same thing in the name of el cheapo?????? Dumb, just plain, dumb.

[MacMadame 81]

Lots of others. And not just for bands but for more involved surgeries like sleeves and RnY.

[PennyLane 0]

I was talking to someone recently that asked me about banding. She wants to go to a doctor that nobody has ever heard of before, in a trashy little TJ clinic, the doctor speaks NO English, the patient speaks NO Spanish, there is no way for her to communicate her questions to him, there is no way for him to communicate his instructions to her, he has no way to explain the band, how it works, how to take care of incisions. He is not Inamed certified, the person doesn't have the slightest idea what brand of band will be placed.

She doesn't know anything about the band, had no idea she had to chew well, had never heard of PBing, sliming, or foaming. Didn't know she needed maintenance on the band, and asked what a port is.

But she is thrilled because the banding is only $5500 and that's where she wanted to go.

To her credit after we talked for an hour she realized she is nowhere near ready for banding, she has a LOT to learn about bands, life with a band, how to chew, what to eat, how to research ANY doctor regardless of country... she just assumed that since he made it through medical school he must be really good otherwise how would he have graduated? And surely he knows to put a US FDA approved band in her even though he is in MX. ???

Spooky.

How much do you think stuff like this is affected by advertisement of the band(s) to the general public? Like how many people see the commercial and only get the "you'll lose weight" part out of it, search for "lap band" on the internet and find an inexpensive surgeon in the Google ads?

Now, of course these people should know better than to make medical decisions based on TV commercials, Google ads and price alone but.....yeah...people should know better than to do a lot of things they do, you know?

Those ads don't show anything approaching the nitty-gritty of banding, and perhaps some people just think "oh, I'll eat less because I won't be so hungry" and think they understand the procedure. Not to defend this type of behavior but sadly, I see how it is totally possible.