Scared to have LB surgery; desperately need some input on a few "pre-op" issues

[Lauren448 0]

Hello All,

I've finally taken the first few steps of meeting with the surgeon and nutritionist, etc., but am really frightened about scheduling the tests I need and REALLY SERIOUSLY considering this surgery because:

1) I have had gastro problems for many years. Mainly, lower GI problems, such as IBS, mucous colitis and have been on meds (Lomotil & Levsin) for years just to control this enough for me to work and get out of the house. At this point, I am probably addicted to these meds; without them, I'm a mess, with constant gastro pain and diarrhea. My fear is having the LB might make things worse?? My current eating habits are undoubtedly making things worse - post LB surgery - will I feel better and can I finally get off of these meds?? I also burp a lot; it seems like a must after eating or it hurts inside. This will probably increase with LB - right?

2) Now this is the "biggie": Am I psychologically healthy enough to live with LB and make the life changes I know I must make? Long story short - I have an adult daughter (22 yrs) who suffers with Tourette Syndrome and Bi-polar disorder. It would be an understatement to say life has been very difficult over the years trying my best and spending a LOT of time and energy helping her to be stable and safe. I know I will have to put myself first and do what is necessary to be successful, but I have lived with so much stress and fear (her decision making is often very bad, with scary & often dangerous results) that there is no doubt my food addiction and gastro problems are a direct reflection on how I emotionally handle the almost daily crisis that arise in my daughter's life. I am currently in therapy to get some help with my "enmeshment" with my daughter, but am worried that I will fail post surgery because of the extreme level of stress in my life.

Any help or advice on either of these subjects would be so greatly appreciated. Thanks for being here to vent and discuss important issues. I want so much to be healthier, but this terrible FEAR is standing in the way of me moving forward toward a realistic surgery date.

[LBHAR101688 0]

We are unable to give advice as you would like. This will utimately lay on you sholders. If you are going through therapy this may be a subject that you can explore with your therapist.

I am so sorry to here of the trials you have gone through with your life. My children always came first for over 30 years. My last child will graduate from high school this week. I decided that this was going to be my year to start taking care of myself. I have or had all the co-morbidities with my weight (diabetes for over 15 years on insuline, asthma for over 20 years on 4 different med for this on a daily basis, and hypertension, 2 different meds for this.) I had my surgery in March of this years have dropped over 40 pounds and am now off of all meds for now. The doctors wanted to see how things would go for the next two months. I am not saying this to tell you to go have the surgery, just letting you know that some of us this has been a god send.

Please continue with your therapy and I will be here almost everyday if you need a friend to talk with.

God bless and my prayers are for you and your daughter.

[Erv 0]

I have a 9 year old with Asperger's and can sympathize with you greatly! The reason I have had my surgery is to better be a part of his world..to be able to run and play and interact with him, rather than huff and puff and sit on the sidelines like I am now. One of my best friends had to help him learn to ride a bike because I was unable to run alongside. Would improved health help you interact and support your daughter better?

The lap band is a tool..nothing more. Only your physician can tell you best how it will improve or hinder your current conditions. If I can't control what I put in my body with the aid of the Lap Band, then it wasn't worth the pain and effort. Believe me, I'm two days postop and these are some serious issues I am facing. The band will not do the work for you, you have to do it yourself with the band's support. The band can make your life miserable, I'm sure if not used correctly or fought. Bottom line, only you can make that decision (with help from your support) if it is worth it to you to make the extra effort to get where you want to be.

Good Luck to you! There are lots and lots of great folks on this site and great information, but the determination and sheer will to succeed will only come from you.:incazzato:

[Lauren448 0]

Thanks Bobbi... I appreciate your reply. I do realize that I have to make the ultimate decision and I am leaning towards "yes" much more than no. It's just the scheduling of the numerous tests and such that I am dragging my feet on. I wish I was less fearful. I know one thing.. I can't continue to live as I have been in this unhealthy body and mind. Losing weight - in any way - can only make my life better, and probably help me to deal with my daughter's illnesses better in the long run. God's ears are probably burning. I am praying incessantly on his guidance as to whether this is the right choice for me. Thanks again for your reply.

[LBHAR101688 0]

As Erv has said the band is just a tool. You will need to learn to eat all over agian. Chewing you food until it is mushy in your mouth, not drinking while eating, and not having any distraction for the 20 - 30 minutes during your meal time.

I know very well about the test before surgery. It took me over a year to have all the test. For sleep apnea (which I didn't think I had), I had to go back three times before I even got my CPAP machine. Then a year of therapy, blood work up, doing the diets for over a year, then I didn't even get my insurance to cover. I had to self pay.

You will do great and make the best decision for yourself.

[coloraturabell 0]

God bless you as you struggle with your fears. I am there right with you. I started this journey in January with the initial consultation, interviews with nutritionist, psychologist, exercise physiologist, sleep study, blood tests, chest x-ray, EKG and after all that I had to spend 3 months getting my thyroid function stable. THEN I had to see a psychologist for 2 1/2 months to see if I am able to handle the outcomes of surgery. Phew! Just do one appointment at a time. By the time it all gets done you will be so much better able to cope with the fears. I am scheduled for 7/28. When the date was set I almost cried....not out of joy but out of shock and fear. I reserve the right to change my mind until they knock me out before surgery. Keep moving toward your goal and if at some point you feel you are being stopped, then stop. But until then, one tiny little step at a time. Much luck!