why are people such HATERS!!!!???

cowgrrl · June 2, 2008

The 'its not a quick fix' argument really gets me. Hello!!! We're talking surgery here. I am having a device placed into my body to help control my eating. This does not appear, to me, to be a 'copout' solution. Also, if it was easy, it would not have taken me over 2 years to make the decision to have the surgery.

Apples2 · June 2, 2008

gg....I had a similar conversation with a good friend over the weekend. Her negative reaction to me having this surgery has sent me into an emotional tail spin. I have two short weeks b/4 my surgery and now I wish I would have never told her what I am up to. I have been choking back tears and crying since Sat. evening when we had our discussion. (Or, should I say, she had her discussion).

Hastings · June 2, 2008

It's good to remember that, while normal weight people may make assumptions about obese folks, it's just as common to see/hear obese folks make rude, snide, assumptive comments about normal weight folks.

Do your own thing and don't take other people's baggage on board. :lol:

kdlee · June 2, 2008

I know just how you feel! I have lost about 20 lbs on my pre-op diet and this nasty nurse that I work with dared to say to me, "Well, if you can lose 20 pounds on your own, why can't you just do the rest yourself?" She was so snotty about it (but then again, she's snotty about everything and no one really likes her attitude). I tried to explain to her that it was a maintanence issue, but then she rudely said "well, I just don't agree with it." Bottom line, I didn't ask her opinion, so why did she think she should offer?

Don't let that nasty woman get you down. Someone who is that nasty at their job must have a nasty home life as well and the only way they make themselves feel better is to make other people miserable!

DebNH · June 2, 2008

I've gotta jump in here. I totally agree with you to have the surgery. For some of us diet & exercise just isn't enough. :w00t:

We require more...and for your doctor to not appreciate that you are TRYING to solve the problem is frusterating at best. :thumbup:

You do what you need to do. And I agree, if some ignorant folks would just come to this site and look around they'd find hundreds of successful weight loss banded survivers. And we are proud of them! :lol:

Hold your position and don't let this get you down.

June 2, 2008

I Completely 100% Without A Doubt Agree With You. The biggest reason I can find people are against LB surgery is IGNORANCE!! They haven't researched it and/or think it is Gastric Bypass.

Two weeks ago at my daughters birthday party a friend asked why I wasn't eating the hotdog bun. I told her that I couldn't have it and eventually told everyone I'd had the surgery. Her mom was there and shouted "Leslie, Oh that is SO DANGEROUS!". This woman is a nurse and her husband is an OBGYN and have two other sons that are doctors too. She was looking into having LB surgery done, did her research and even had her insurance approve her. One of her sons came to visit her and told her it was a VERY dangerous surgery and he just operated on a woman who had it and it perforated her stomach. I told her that it is the safest weight loss surgery available and just because one person (whom her son knows) had complications doesn't mean that it will happen to everyone. I told her I know and knew the risks and I'd rather that the chance of something happening with my band than living with diabetes, high blood pressure and heart disease by the time I was 40. I also told her she had no idea if the woman in question had a pre-existing condition or if she followed the rules us bandsters need to follow to be successful.

People can be so judgemental and negative. By the time I left that weekend (we were at the beach as were they), her husband was asking me quesitons and so was she. He (BEING A DOCTOR) thought there was malabsorption and dumping and all of the bad things associated with gastric bypass - IGNORANCE.

DebNH · June 2, 2008

Leslie, that wasn't very compassionate of the doctors wife! :thumbup:

Ugh... Sometimes people only concentrate on the negative sides of everything, rather than looking at the positive. The reduction in your blood pressure, cholesteral, insulin production etc etc etc :lol:

June 2, 2008

No - it wasn't nice of her at all. My mother was there and of course freaked out. I told her, mom it is done now and can't nor would I want it undone. I was ready to pull my hair out by the time the cake was cut.

kathystrick · June 2, 2008

You answered your own question. A lot of the time, the people who have a negative attitude about WLS have never fought the battles we have trying to get control of their weight because they have never had a weight issue. That doesn't make them right or you any less knowledgable about what is right for your body. That just adds one more name to the list of people you will amaze with the new you once you have surgery and that weight is gone forever!!

gg2007BandSTAR · June 2, 2008

Thanks you all for the replies and for your support. As you have mentioned, people can be ignorant to WLS....or think you are going down the GBP which is a whole other story. People think its the easy way, but it is far from it! You still have to put in the work to loose the weight, as as mentioned if you work against your band, you will end up putting weight on. Surgery is a big decision, and there is no way im gonna mess it up, or put myself at further risk but not following what i should be doing with the band.

What gets me is when you try to educate people about it, and they STILL dont want to listen to what you have to say! People are so quick to focus on the negatives and dont even see the positive side of things.

But for once im doing this for ME and nobody else.

You have all been great support!!

Thank you.

Froggi · June 2, 2008

You Go Girl :lol: I Would Have Smacked A Hoe Lol

June 2, 2008

Girl you have the right attitude about it. I didn't tell many people before hand about the surgery because of the negativity associated with WLS. It wasn't that I was afraid they would change my mind - I was having the surgery no matter what the masses said, I just didn't want to hear it. It comes to a point when you start hearing the Charlie Brown Adult Voices...WAH, WAH, WAH, WAH...I try to tune them out. If not, I get angry and my blood pressure shoots up and that helps no one!

In the end it is your decision, your body and your life. You have to do what is right for you. If they don't like it - tough sh**, they'll just have to deal with it...Good luck to you!!!

gg2007BandSTAR · June 2, 2008

hi leslie,

I'm also not telling many people about the op, my mother and my sister and that it. If people are going to be negative, there gonna be negative. But as for me i don't have the time to listen to it...!

They dont live my life, or go through what i have to go through, or suffer from the effects of the weight i carry around. So stuff the lot of them.

They had better move outta my way , cos GG is coming through, no matter what they say or do!! :lol:

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Diz · June 2, 2008

gg....I had a similar conversation with a good friend over the weekend. Her negative reaction to me having this surgery has sent me into an emotional tail spin. I have two short weeks b/4 my surgery and now I wish I would have never told her what I am up to. I have been choking back tears and crying since Sat. evening when we had our discussion. (Or, should I say, she had her discussion).

Hey Apples2...please do not let your friend get you down. She's scared too. She's scared of you having surgery and something bad happening, she's scared of the skinny you, she's scared you'll change and not be her friend anymore. So she reacted in a negative way. Don't let her fear latch on to you. Just stay strong and she'll eventually come around. P.S. I love your "Apples2" logo...been a MAC fan since 85 (Geez, I'm getting old).

gg2007BandSTAR · June 2, 2008

Hey hun! i felt excatly the same as you didn when i walked out of her office, i started to question and doubt myself, thinking...what am i doing?...is she right? But then i started thinking to myself why i opted for this surgery and what the benefits not only to my immediate health but to my life would be. By the time i walked the 20 seconds to the car, i soon snapped out of it!!! All of the negativity i got from her i turned it into positive, and that just drove me to know that this is what i really want!

Again i have done research upon research about lapbadning , and know about the good and the not so good. But if you know that you want it (100%) dont let any body change your mind, or put doubts in your head. If you want it, GO FOR IT!!! it does work...we only need to look around us on the forum.

i have found that when people see that you are trying to do something to better yourself, they just wanna bring you down. Dont let them! xxxx

xxxxxx

gg....I had a similar conversation with a good friend over the weekend. Her negative reaction to me having this surgery has sent me into an emotional tail spin. I have two short weeks b/4 my surgery and now I wish I would have never told her what I am up to. I have been choking back tears and crying since Sat. evening when we had our discussion. (Or, should I say, she had her discussion).

Edited June 2, 2008 by gg2007BandSTAR