I'm here to help...

[1day at a time 2]

Happy birthday Janet. Sorry I missed you yesterday.

Things in my house have been totally crazy. My SIL has 8 children and has another one due any moment. Two of the oldest children are adopted but one has left the house already. The other one is a 12 year old boy. She called here 2 days ago saying she didn't want him anymore. Can you believe that sh**? She adopted this boy 9-10 years ago and has just decided she doesn't want him anymore. She asked my MIL if she would take him. Well my MIL and FIL are old. Too old too raise a child. My FIL works 2 jobs and my MIL works but they are getting ready for retirement. They cannot take him so they told her that. SO, My SIL turns around and calls the department of children and families to find out how she can give him back to the state. They refered her to family social services, who refered her to a childrens foster home, who refered her to the abuse hotline. She spent all day on the phone yesterday trying to get someone to tell her how to surrender him. So now she is being investigated by the state to find out why she won't keep him and if she should be keeping the rest of the children. She could end up losing all of them to the state.

My Husband and I have been talking about it alot. We have decided that if she really goes through with this that we would like to adopt him. We are the only hope he has. If we don't he has to go back to foster care and we really don't want that. So we maybe adding another child to our family. I am so sad for him that she is doing this but happy at the same time that we may be getting another child. I have always wanted more children but I can't get off my meds in order to get pregnant. And I can't take my meds and be pregnant. I have wanted to adopt for years but my hubby was so scared to do it. He didn't want us to get a child that was too much for us to handle. But, we already know this child and think he is pretty good for a 12 year old boy. He does have some attention problems but we can deal with that. It is crazy timing but it could be perfect timing. We are moving out in May or June so we should know by then what is going to happen. And know what kind of place we will need. This situation is just so crazy I hope she lets him stay but if not we are prepared to take him.

It just baffles me why someone would do such a thing. This is something that can destroy someones life. I think she actually maybe going crazy. It would just break my heart to do something like this to anyone. It is also bringing back some bad memories of my own childhood. I know he is going to need therapy after all this. I am just really emotional about the situation. I could write on and on about how this is making me feel. But I won't.

On a lighter note, I signed my 5 year old up for tee ball today. We are both really excited. I even got him a little glove. He can't wait to get on the field and I can't wait to watch.

I think it is a wonderful thing that you are willing to take him so he does not go back to foster care. You are right he may need some therapy. i hope everything works out with this for you.

I bet it was to cute buying your 5 your old a little glove.

Janet - Happy Belated birthday.

[LittleOleMeinFL 1]

Melissa....Here's the scoop:

Janet has a new house pet that she LOVES

Cheri reached goal

Phyll left on a cruise

Great is on a weekend honeymoon

Jewel has some huge life decisions to make regarding a nephew...worth reading her post....sad

Arlene....is hanging in achey weather

Linda is back at work and turning off lights all over the country and is swinging her hips to her new music

Eva is back on track and just hanging out in her white shirts

Laura is hanging with Nels and helping him recover from two broken bones in his hand. Darned Auntie, anyway

NYSparkle aka Jodi...has become our friend and has given us bits and pieces of her life in NY and her heritage

Deb is being Deb...and always has something to share

I am in Atlanta (Covington) at my son's and leaving for FL in the morning

That about sums it all up in a nutshell. Happy to hear you had a good trip. I would love to walk down (and make a few stops) Rodeo Drive. See you in a couple of weeks!

Apples~I vote YOU to write the cliff notes version of the posts EVERY day! LOL. Too funny and too cute! So glad you had a facial. I haven't had one in years- they are nice. Have a safe trip.

Melissa~ welcome home. Glad you had fun in LA. He accidently slammed it in my sister's car door! ouch

DH waltzed in at 2am. yawn. His last patient was an older guy with a splenectomy- he used all the blood from the two local hospitals keeping this guy alive! DH (not the patient) was so wired from the adrenaline with this case that he could not sleep. I finally got up and let him "talk" it out. He is so passionate about his work. I love that about him.

My parents said they have 8 inches of snow in NC! Why didn't it snow like that when WE were there!!! They are snowed in and stressing. Dad was supposed to go in for labs and fluids today. Despite having a jeep, they were afraid to get out of the driveway. He gets a "break" from chemo this week but still has to go in every other day for labs/fluids. He's down emotionally and weak physically. He ordered a scooter that medicare paid for. Just in the two weeks since I was there he is unable to walk much. So sad. I hope he bounces back a little with the break.

Took Nels to TKD this morning and then to the oceanographic coastal center. He fed stingrays and other creatures. Fun. DH is cooking lamb stew. I am doing laundry. Does Saturday get any more exciting?!

More later...peasout

[1day at a time 2]

Laura - Yeah out about his hand but I guess he is feeling better now. Boys bounce real quick from pain.

[NYSparklegirl 1]

Hi all.....

I hope you all are having a great weekend....my daughter is out for shabbos...and im well....blowing shabbos off?

Feeling guilty....but obviously not that guilty to not um be not keeping shabbat this shabbat however I needed a break and I just dont get it more then a few times a year.....just to be me and socialize at dinner with wine and cheese mayby like a real person...

without thinking about cleaning,cooking three four course meals setting the tables, washing the dishes and going to shul....and keeping my DD and all her ten year old friends buisy with their afternoon shabbat party at my house...or sleepover all alone. phew...jsut tired writing all that! lol

well, going on out now....to movie..and dinner afterward.

Tomorrow going to be taking my Dassi to her Act class....which is where I will be sitting and waiting for her six hours!! so....Ill def be posting about my past weeks going ons!!!

Have a great night all

Jodi

[Apples2 19]

Hi all.....

I hope you all are having a great weekend....my daughter is out for shabbos...and im well....blowing shabbos off?

Feeling guilty....but obviously not that guilty to not um be not keeping shabbat this shabbat however I needed a break and I just dont get it more then a few times a year.....just to be me and socialize at dinner with wine and cheese mayby like a real person...

without thinking about cleaning,cooking three four course meals setting the tables, washing the dishes and going to shul....and keeping my DD and all her ten year old friends buisy with their afternoon shabbat party at my house...or sleepover all alone. phew...jsut tired writing all that! lol

well, going on out now....to movie..and dinner afterward.

Tomorrow going to be taking my Dassi to her Act class....which is where I will be sitting and waiting for her six hours!! so....Ill def be posting about my past weeks going ons!!!

Have a great night all

Jodi

OK Jodi..I gotta ask...explain shabbos, please? thanks:unsure:

[IndioGirl55 32]

Melissa - I was thinking about you this morning... I haven't been to Sunset strip in a long time - but ya I have heard they have a lot of bums (I am old school I still call them bums) We get alot here in the desert in the winter - but they clear out some in the summer - to hot to live under the bridge - Glad you had a good time - I haven't been on Rodeo Dr - the PS that I went and saw was right off Rodeo Dr The prices scare the crap out of me - And like I have said before - I think they have special glasses - She she's really a fat chick - just like pretty woman - she doesn't belong here..

Apples - OK girl you had me spitting out my Water !!!! Loving the new dog !!!! Ya you get an A for memory... Glad you had a facial - they are great - I haven't had one in ages... I use to get them monthly but now I have a trainer so that's were the $$ goes.. I think Shabbos is the same as Shabbat -from sundown on friday nite to sundown Saturday nite you can't do anything - cook clean etc no work - you really aren't even suppose to watch tv I think - my jewish history is a little weak (well alot really)

Melissa I DON'T love the new dog.. it's ok but like a baby you gotta watch it 24/7 -

Laura - Lamb stew sounds good - I am going to Ruth Chris's for dinner tonite - Andrew's Mom gave me a gift cert for my bday - I ck'd menu - I am having lobster - so the kids (andrew and friend Janelle) are going w/me ) they are going to have to eat light :0) so I can have my lobster !!!!

Phyl emailed me - had fish & Soup for lunch and a $10 glass of wine - she's switching to the drink of the day it doesn't cost so much lol... or her new drink of choice tequilla and crystal lite..

Linda - I hate when pple are late an interfer w/my schedule..

I didn't do much took my dogs on a little walk and ran a little bit - angel was full of energy and she ran so I had to keep up with her - my fatty bear can't run.. I saw a little bit about those pad - I would love one - only 400 but what about the monthly cost to get the interenet ?? If I only had to pay once and not monthly - I would love it..

Well I we have reservations for 7 - so I guess I better figure out what I am wearing - glad it's desert casual - (meaning not to casual but not super dressy) Thinking boots leggings long sweater and pearls :0)

[JeweI 2]

A little update.

A lady from the state came out today and watched the kids play basketball. She told them they need to put him in public school and in a special ed class. SIL told my MIL she is not willing to do that. She will not stoop so low as to put her children in public school. She is really making him out to be this troubled kid. Someone else is coming out tommorrow to check things out. We are hoping to have him evaluated by a psychiatrist.

Last year my son had just started at a christian preschool. They had someone come out and evaluate him for learning disabilities. They told us he was special ed too. Now he is perfectly normal. He was just having a hard time adjusting to being in preschool instead of home with me. We just got his progress report, he has improved tremendously and is right where he should be. It just took a little extra work and the right preschool teacher.

[Great2BThin 5]

Good evening, back from my night in Salt Lake City. We had a great time. A lot evolved around food. LOL We had our favorite Mexican restaurant right away for lunch. They we discovered that In & Out Burger arrived in Utah, so we had that for dinner and also for lunch today. We drove around lots, it sure has grown and changed in 10 yrs. then we went to the suburb we lived in for years while my kids were growing up. I got all weepy eyed at the elementary school they went to kindergarten, DH says that solves it, if we move back here we are not living near where we used to live. LOL

I have not read all the posts that I missed but from my Facebook I have seen that I missed Janet's birthday so Happy Birthday!! and that Phyl is on a cruise, Bon Voyage!! Hope Apples is enjoying that son of her's.

[Apples2 19]

Good evening, back from my night in Salt Lake City. We had a great time. A lot evolved around food. LOL We had our favorite Mexican restaurant right away for lunch. They we discovered that In & Out Burger arrived in Utah, so we had that for dinner and also for lunch today. We drove around lots, it sure has grown and changed in 10 yrs. then we went to the suburb we lived in for years while my kids were growing up. I got all weepy eyed at the elementary school they went to kindergarten, DH says that solves it, if we move back here we are not living near where we used to live. LOL

I have not read all the posts that I missed but from my Facebook I have seen that I missed Janet's birthday so Happy Birthday!! and that Phyl is on a cruise, Bon Voyage!! Hope Apples is enjoying that son of her's.

Yes, Great, it's been a lovely visit with DS. He's such a good host and seen to all of our wants and needs. Wants to feed us every half hour..he tends to forget he has a "Band Momma".

I still get weepy when I visit our farm that we moved from when my kids were 4 and 6. You are just being a normal mother.

Have heard that In and Out Burgers are the best.

Watching movie with DS, Tanker and DH....Later

[llkb4me 1]

Jessica, thoughts and prayers for you and your family on the best out come for all.

Melissa, Apples forgot me because she is trying to pretend she doesn't want a CHOC LAB PUPPY. Big brown puppy eyes, soft and cuddly needing a new momma LOL

I went to the Frankenmuth snowfest today. Wow what beautiful snow and ice sculptures. Down side way to many people, had a hard time seeing some of them. Felt like we were cattle being pushed through a shute. Dang was it cold, had on 3 shirts, coat, 2 prs of socks, boots, ear muffs, cuddle duds & gloves. brrrrrr

Cheri, congrats on getting to goal.

Take care.

Laura K

[Great2BThin 5]

Cheri, sorry I missed seeing your post about hitting goal. CONGRATS!!!

[Apples2 19]

Dang, LauraK...sorry I missed you in the summary of events. I KNEW I would miss someone. Got that choc lab off my mind. Thinking of stealing DS's husky on the way out of town!

[Mrs. Bubba 0]

Hey gang.......Apples, we're going to have to get educated about Jodi's Jewish things... I've never heard of those things either..... Jodi, just pretend (?)we're dumb and explain everthing in detail!!!! I've also never heard of In and Out Burgers!!!

Janet, love your description of desert casual..... We had supper out tonight, too.... It was a community thing called "Taste of Washburn"..... Business people make a single dish (ordinary or unusual) and give out samples to everyone... $5 each, Mimi was free.... with 25 or more businesses sampling things is a full meal............ There was everything from fresh fruit to homemade bread...german dishes and Beans and chili and of course lots of desserts.... kuchen, cheesecake.... but all little bit-sized pieces... Mimi had 4 little cups of fruit and lots of nibbles of other stuff... I had a bit of a number of things and got very full, but didn't overdo until I went after the second piece of cheese kuchen... It had protein.....(cottage cheese)............ what can I say!!! anyway.... I kicked in my carb button and now I want to eat everything in the house... Have managed to not do that, but I'm not asleep yet, either!!!!

Otherwise, the day certainly had its ups and downs.... Washed my cell phone............. lovely............. Have PT on Tuesday so will have to get a new one then..... dang it anyway..... Started using a new brand of eye liner recently and my eyes have started itching and watering.... Don't know if it's that or not... Just washed them good with soap and Water again... Hoping the itching subsides now.....

Anyway, time for bed...... Take care all............. Julie :thumbup:

[ifyourstomachoffendsyou 1]

Thanks for the congrats guys. I'll probably be going up and down for the next week before the new weight settles in. Thats what usually happens.

Jessica, as a Christian who went to Christian schools and sent my kids there and as one who teaches in a Christian school, I gotta say your SIL is nuts.

She'd rather do the most unChristian thing I've heard of than get the child the help he needs from a public school?

He's probably ADHD with a learning disability and now the hormones are kicking in. And she's too busy and tired trying to raise and homeschool the rest of them to give him the extra help and attention he needs. So she'd rather get rid of him than send him where he can get the help he needs and admit that she's failing him. What misplaced pride.

The most generous interpretation I have is that she's having pregnancy psychosis. What a message she's sending to the other children. Screw up, don't measure up to our "Christian" standards and we will get rid of you.

Where is her DH in all this? Why isn't he getting her the help she needs? Including psychiatric.

I would have the boy thoroughly evaluated before fostering or adopting him. He may be very damaged already from his first home life as well as the second. He may need special placement in a therapeutic setting, particularly if he has bonding issues and PTSD as well as academic and behavioral issues.

Reactive Attachment Disorder can make adopting an absolute nightmare. Some of these children are too damaged to be placed in a regular family.

If that is the case with your nephew, then we may be judging your sister too harshly. Sometimes these children are actually a danger to their parents and siblings.

But like most sociopaths they can present really well to outsiders who don't see them on a daily basis. They can be very charming but never actually bond and feel no remorse over doing wrong or hurting others, only over getting caught. They can be highly manipulative and you end up feeling crazy and not knowing why.

I think what you are offering is tremendous and I truly hope it works out. Make sure you have state funding and medical care for this child and payment for any therapy and extra tutoring he might need. I would initially go foster care with him because once adopted you might not have access to funding to provide for his needs.

My brother and his wife had to give a young child back to the province because the local social services refused to diagnose the child as having rad and provide them with the support services they needed. They had the child privately evaluated and found out she not only had RAD and PTSD, she was ADHD and had Fetal Alcohol Sysndrome. It killed them to do it but they did not have the training or the access to funds to provide the child with the care she needed and this was the only way they could force the province and social services to provide for her. The two or three years they went through all that were some of the worst times of their life and they felt like total failures.

Cheri

Edited January 31, 2010 by ifyourstomachoffendsyou

[ocotillo 0]

Evening everyone

A Prairie Home Companion was great tonight. Garrison read my friend's greeting....it was Michael from Cindy and Eva, don't forget to close the gate so the javalina's don't eat the pansies. So if you listen to that program...listen in the 2nd half for the greetings....that will be one of them.

Julie, bummer about your phone. Sneaky little thing, what was it doing sneaking back into a pocket. The tast of Washburn sounds like fun. We have Tucson meet yourself...of course we call it Tucson eat yourself. It's individual vendors from the different nationalities in town and restaurants. You buy from the vendors. It's a good way to try new stuff.

Yes Apples, I wore a white shirt to the show today. Didn't get my dinner on it either...maybe because I'm not eating so much anymore. Wow a side benefit to banding.

1day..glad you had a nice time in California. Welcome back.

Laura...sounds like a nice Saturday to me. Hope your Dad perks back up. Driving in the snow might be a little taxing right now. The roads will clear up soon and they'll be out and about again.

I think the show high is finally wearing off. Guess I'm off to sleep now. Have a great night.

Eva