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Laura, dear, my heart is with you...........I've been where you are almost exactly......only with my dad it was leukemia... they did everything but the right thing until it was too late... The anger about that still gets me going and its been 13 years.... I'm praying for all of you... take care..........

Just a quick note to say goodbye and I'll be back sometime later next week..... I'm a bit better and have my fingers crossed that this will be a good experience... I love you all and wish you a wonderful week.... take care and God Bless........... Julie

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Laura, I'm sending you hugs, kisses and love to you and your family. I am so very sorry. Please know that I will be thinking of you and your family and sending positive thoughts every time I think of all of you. Linda

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Laura, I am so sorry your news was not good. I know your parents must be in shock, and you too. Please know you and your parents will be in my daily prayers.

Arlene

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Laura...there's no words to say except that I KNOW we are all here for you. I would be soooooooo angry after all the time your poor papa spent in the other hospitals. You wouldn't think it would have been so difficult to diagnose....especially with his symptoms.

If you remember, about a month ago I mentioned a person in my life (she has been my "mom" for the last 20 years) was going through surgery. She was diagnosed with kidney and bladder cancer 7 yrs ago. She is now 89. Her left kidney and ureter was removed six years ago. A year later she was treated for bladder cancer. Treatment was chemo flush for six-eight weeks. Her bladder cancer is back and she is doing eight week treatments again. She is very lucky because cancerous tumors did not break through the bladder wall. It makes me wonder how long this has been going on with your dear dad to get a diagnosis like this. Her symptoms were immediate and it took one visit to her urologist and one biopsy to come to know what was going on.

I sometimes wonder if some docs don't want to be TOO agressive when it comes to "seniors".

I cannot imagine your state of mind at this moment. Try to fill your days concentrating on your Nels and your DH and how you can arrange your life to be with your parents when you can. I am so sorry you are going through this.

Will be thinking of you and are hoping you will keep us informed on how your mom and dad are doing and also how you are doing with all of this. Sending love your way.

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Laura, I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. My heart and thoughts will be with you throughout this time. We will all be here if you need to rant, talk, cry, whatever. I truly hope the situation with your SIL and you traveling back and forth will work out in your favor.

Apples, job? Are you going to take it?

Julie, have a great trip...really relax and enjoy yourself.

Janet, I truly understand about not having a man help you out and working, doing, paying for everything yourself. I've been doing my own thing forever. My DH and I finally have a joint checking account but didn't do that until 2 years ago when we got married. It's used just for utilities and house payments. Everything else is separated. I am very independent and do stuff on my own with my own money, I always have. As I think about retirement, I would have to rely more on DH for trips and stuff and it's just too weird yet. Yes, you would need a hobby or something to keep you interested and occupied. I have stamping, gardening, working on the yard (making concrete blocks to finish the sidewalk on the south side of the house), and a zillion other things. I suspect I would get bored with that too. Great job on the shrimp cocktail. I love those, especially ones made with fresh tomatoes, onions, jalapenos, cilantro, and lime juice.

Cheri, you are very good at writing. It's too bad you can't make a living at that, but I bet you are a great teacher too and the kids need you. Since a lot of us are in our 50's or so, our work life and the continuing of it is one of the issues we have to deal with. Most of us have to work and hopefully we like our jobs, but it isn't always that way.

Okay, speaking of jobs, I need to go do mine. I'm working on a revision that involves 4 jobs going back to 2003. I have to untangle the steps and redo them to clear up some problem. Yuck....it makes my head spin.

Have a good day.

Eva

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OK Girls, Lets all keep our fingers crossed and pray that this thing with Laura's dad is not as dire as the docs are saying.....

RE: Job...don't know yet. I meet with owners again today and then I need to do some thinking on pros and cons of going back to work. I could choose to work 4-7 days a week. The job is mine if I want it. DH is behind me either way. I used to be able to handle my obligations at home and still work over 50 hours a week. Would not start till Dec 1 but need to decide within the next three weeks.

Have a 9lbs pork loin in the oven roasting along with baby garlic/italian seasoned potatoes and creamed carrots (just lowfat evaporated milk poured over the top..makes a nice dish). Cheesy monkey bread waiting for it's spot in the oven when it's time. See why it is difficult for me to decide on the job thing? I would need to do all this either b/4 or after work or both. I will now when it is time what decision to make.

Eva...good luck sorting through your work stuff. Dont' pull your hair out!

Cheri....As I have said b/4...admire you for the job you do with those kids. I am sure there are nights that you are completely, emotionally exhausted.

Gotta get going. Only have 1/2 my floor scrubbing done and still need to shower and set up for dinner. Later.

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Hey guys.

Thanks. Thanks. Thanks. For all the thoughts and prayers. Thanks Apples for the call. Your cheerful voice and previous experience with this type of cancer makes me feel less alone with this, really. I guess I have been so blessed never having to deal with a really sick loved one. I have never had family or friend die of cancer. It isn't something I know how to do and I am feeling very overwhelmed. And then when I feel overwhelmed, I feel GUILTY for having my own pity party and think about my parents and wonder how they are getting through their day! They had an appt with the urologist that did his last cystoscopy and admission. Dad wanted to see his face when he hears that he had to travel all the way to Baltimore to get a REAL dr to find a REAL diagnosis. I am not sure if they are still there, or they are home and don't feel like answering the phone. I had a bunch of things I wanted to do today. But when I looked at my list, they all seemed so irrelevant and unimportant. And combined with the fact that my face is all red and splotchy from crying, and people would just stare at me and I would probably start crying in the middle of the store and then have to deal with people thinking I was an escaped mental patient, just decided not to go. I just need a day to wallow I guess. Tomorrow I have my Brazilian girls coming to do a last once over of the house, will add all the linens and go do grocery shopping. And then Saturday Nelson and I will drive 2 hrs to Miami to pick them up. DH is on call and can't leave town. <taking a deep cleansing breath>

Tried to eat a piece of cinnamon toast this morning with my coffee. It's something my mom always made me when I didn't feel good, or didn't feel like eating. Slice of white bread, melted butter and sugar. Ate half of it and then got stuck... Iron fist. Didn't PB but didn't eat or drink anything for 3 hrs. Now just had a Protein shake and feel better. It was so weird that something that used to make me feel so much better, REALLY made me feel worse than I was already feeling.

I decided to send my Dad a text, I just don't want to bug him on the phone all the time. Maybe it's best for them to call me when they feel like talking. Who knows how he's feeling today. I don't know that I would want to talk to anyone.

Thanks everyone. Laura

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Laura....you do a pretty good job with going with your emotions. Feel 'em, get 'em out. Try to stay busy with fun stuff with Nelson. Your company might turn out to be a blessing in diguise. There most likely will be times in the next month you will need or want to travel to see your parents and your SIL and nephew can help to keep Nels busy while you are away. Being busy with them can also help to take your mind off of things.

When we were on the phone I was going to remind you to watch for signs of stress with your band. Sorry you had that "stuck" episode this morning. Get all your nutrients, try to get some rest and go for foods during this time that you know you do not have problems with.

Appreciate you keeping us informed. Hugs

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I went to the GP today. She thinks I may have Fibromyalgia. She did not prescribed the heavy duty anti inflammatories because I can't tolerate them. She did prescribe a muscle relaxor for my stomach and told me to take advil for the aching. If the pain persist she is going to prescribe a new drug for Fibromyalgia. Changing weather is not going to be my friend this fall and winter.

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I went to the GP today. She thinks I may have Fibromyalgia. She did not prescribed the heavy duty anti inflammatories because I can't tolerate them. She did prescribe a muscle relaxor for my stomach and told me to take advil for the aching. If the pain persist she is going to prescribe a new drug for Fibromyalgia. Changing weather is not going to be my friend this fall and winter.

Arlene...so sorry for your struggles. Hopefully you will get some relief soon. Have you checked with your LB doc on taking the Advil? Just a thought. Would not like to see you have tummy troubles because of it. Take care.

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I'm HOME!!! I got to come home today about 230pm. DH moved a recliner from the basement tothe family room as it provided better support behind my knee, I have DD's laptop and am set. Only thing is I can't type well on it so sorry for thetypos. I had a few minor complications with my blood pressure and hematocrit (sp) count. They almost gave me 2 units of blood but my surgeon decided to hold off since I was 'young' (thanks doc) and healthy. Also they gave me 2 bags of IV Fluid, Protein Shakes and changed my pain pills. What a difference 24 hours makes. I hardly have any pain and the therapists were amazed at how well I could move and get around. So each day should get better and better. For some reason on the hospital's WIFI I couldn't access this site, I could get my email and Facebook but no Yahoo or LBT. My family has been awesome, my son even spent a night in the hospital with me. Speaking of the hospital they upgraded me to a suite for all my volunteer work, it was like a nice hotel room. Everyone that visited me was amazed. I have a walker to use at home but can really probably go to crutches or the cane already.

Laura, sorry to hear of your dad. You sure these dr's aren't the ones that are wrong vs the ones that said he didn't have cancer? That really sucks.

Apples, Yep I am one that would say why would you want a job, but I'm not you. You need to do what makes you feel happy and fulfilled, different strokes for different folks. The 65 mile drive would do me in. I apply for jobs at the hospital I was in sometimes but wonder if I want to drive 20 miles. LOL

Sorry I just skimmed as I had 3 pages to read so have no other personals for now.

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Arlene, we must've posted at the same time. Sorry to hear about the fibromyalgia, i hear that is rather painful. Hope they can prescribe something that works well for you.

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Arlene, we must've posted at the same time. Sorry to hear about the fibromyalgia, i hear that is rather painful. Hope they can prescribe something that works well for you.

I am so glad you are home and feeling so good. Take it easy, and don't over do.

The only way I can describe it is my abdomen feels like I just got out of lap band surgery. Those adhesions spasm right across my stomach which causes my stomach to cramp. I am going to only take the advil when needed and alternate with Tylenol. I will save pain meds for last resort. I hope the stomach relaxor works because it hurts worse than the body aches. I am thinking I might have a little more taken out of my band till I can get a handle on all of this new found problem. I have been journaling and walking, but still have not lost weight. At least I have not gained........that is a blessing!

Take Care!

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Laura - Hugs Hugs Hugs - I know what you are going through and Know the feeling of helplessness- and how little things like food shopping seem irrelevant when your Dad has cancer.. I don't know if you are religious/spiritual or not - I can't say I am a holy roller (far from it) but I do believe in God - and he will get you through this - my Dad spent the last month of his life in ICU and I was your age - you will be strong for your parents you will do what you have to do to help them and that will help you. I know I spent the last 6 months of their lives with them - doctors hospitals picking up meds - food shopping - doing what I could.. I wish I could make it all better for you... Just know we are here for you anytime..

Cheri - you would make a great writer..

Eva - Sounds like we are a lot alike :0)

Charlene - Hugs on the filbromyalga (sp) I a girl who use to work with me has it.. Hope the med's help..

Great - Yea - so glad to hear you are doing well - Phyl and I were cking fb and posting your progress..

Apples - I just got another producer this morning - we use to all work with all the producers then we changed to working with just the one who we had the most with and during the boom my book of business went from 2.8 mil premium to 10 mil - now with the recession it's back down to 2.9 mil and looks like some more layoffs - so now I am helping one of the other owner.. I just don't know - You are the kind of person who likes to be busy - and maybe I do to - but I think I would like a yr of retirement :0)... You will make the right decision for you...

Well, need to go feed the dogs - the scales were good to me this morning - 143 (it's still on the high side of my 5 lbs limit) but I am happy - it will get back down as long a I don't have anymore traveling to do :0)

CBL:wub:

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Lori....so great to hear from you and to know how well you are doing. You will be up and running in no time. Good luck keeping up with Phyll. Sounds like she has hit the ground running and not looking back! So nice the surgery is behind you and you have the future with a new knee to look forward to.

"Hi" to everyone else. My butt is planted on the couch and watching some Oakie movie with DH and doing my NY Times and LA Times daily crosswords. I think you could take away anything from me but my dailys!

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