To tell or not to tell co-workers??

[Susie70 0]

I can't make up my mind on whether or not to tell my co-workers about getting the lapband surgery. On one hand, I don't want to tell them because it's very personal and I don't want to be judged by others for taking "the easy route". But on the other hand, I fear that by keeping this secret, I'll feel like I can't be honest with people and that may affect me. Also, I wonder if people will be more supportive than judgmental and by me not saying anything, I'll be missing out on their support.

Have those of you told your co-workers? If so, were you happy with the decision to open up to them?

Have those of you who haven't told your co-workers? Do you regret it and feel "alone" with everything that is going on where you can't share?

Thanks in advance for your thoughts and advice! :party:

[jaria007 2]

at first, i decided only to tell a select few. as the time drew near and people saw me out for doc appts, drinking shakes and not eating food, I got all kinds of questions and finally decided to spill the Beans. I wasnt afraid to say anything...I just didnt want negativity. Well, everyone was veryyyyy supportive and, if anything, had a ton of questions. As long as your are well informed and prepared to answer questions of those that speculate, I say go for it. You will be losing weight anyway and evenutally it is going to get out, so might as well have support from the beginning. good luck

[willowcrown 1]

Hi there...

I personally have not kept my decision to have surgery from anyone.

My work "family" has been so incredibly supportive and truly interested in the whole process that it's been a great source of comfort. The dentist that I work for has supported me every step of the way, once he learned about everything involved with preparing for surgery - the testing, the psychological counseling, etc.

Not one single person was accusatory about "taking the easy way out". I simply printed out an anatomical diagram about how the lap band works as I explained what I was having done. It was easier to show the band as a tool and not a quick fix.

After my surgery, I received a get well card and a gift card to a local department store from my staff. They had all chipped in what they could afford to purchase the gift card so that I could buy new clothes in smaller sizes as I "shrunk". I was so touched and felt glad about my decision to tell everyone.

Best of luck to you.

[HarleyGirl 1]

Everyone at my work knows.....pretty much everyone in my life knows...and it has worked very, very well for me.

My co-workers are INCREDIBLY supportive and make me feel great every day.

I need all of the support I can get....by telling the people in my life, I increase the amount of support. If it means a few people make snarky remarks....so be it. I knew going in to this that some people have negative attitudes towards WLS.....

[val 7]

i told my coworkers, because they would notice by the change in my eating. aquaintances i didnt tell, if they wanted to know what surgery i had i would tell them i had my gall bladder out

[Laurinda 1]

Telling or not telling really is a personal issue. I have read where some ppl tell no one and some tell everyone. Whatever you decide just remember this is NOT "The easy way out" and anyone who thinks that way really has no clue. Don't let anyone belittle your achievements by telling you other wise! Good-Luck with whatever you choose!!

[ssdown 0]

I only told my supervisor at work and she's great. She is the only one that knows and she is very good at keeping secrets. I did not want to be judged (misjudged) by my coworkers, be questioned as to how much I've lost, etc. I guess I just don't want to be scrutinized by them. Sure, I've lost weight and some have noticed. I tell them I'm dieting AGAIN and hope this time I will be able to keep it off. They've seen me gain and loose weight on many occasions, so this is not something new! I also decided to tell only a few of my family members for the same reasons. Remember, word travels fast and a lot more people will know besides your co-workers. It's your call! Good luck SS

[Long2BFree 12]

I've told a few that I'm close with along with my supervisors because of the time I would be missing for appointments. Everyone has been very positive.

[FeliciaLevy75 0]

My 2 bosses have been completely supportive. So much, in fact, that I wouldn't be on this forum or having surgery tomorrow if it weren't for them.

I have let one person in my office, and one person with whom I work remotely know that I am having the band placed, and a few others know only that I am having surgery. We (those in the know) aren't hiding it, but we're not advertising it, either. If people notice (and I hope they do), then I will tell them about it.

I find myself almost advertising the fact that I am having surgery, in hopes that people will ask. This is me, now, band and all, and I will tell anyone who will listen. =)

[MacMadame 81]

My experiences in the past with losing weight when co-workers know you are doing something have lead me to not tell them about this.

It isn't that they weren't supportive. It's that they were in my business when I didn't need them to be. Like if I was in the kitchen having a snack, they'd say "should you be eating that?" And they were asking me how much weight I'd lost all the time to the point where it got annoying. Then when I got near my goal weight, I started to get the "now don't lose too much weight" comments.

It was FREAKING ANNOYING after a while.

This time, I'm not going to talk about it so much and hopefully that cause people to keep all their comments to themselves.

[lynzz 0]

I personally have not told anyone aside from my husband, friend that accompanied me on my surgery trip and my mother in-law that was banded 2 weeks before me.

It wasn't because I think being banded is the "easy" way out. As a matter of fact, the pre-op and post-op were some of the hardest diets that I ever been on. Honestly I think that I didn't tell because I do not need the added pressure of being constantly questioned as to how much weight I've lost and because my family would have never supported my decision of having the surgery in Mexico.

I guess I could be missing out on the support that I could possibly be getting from friends and family, but I am essentially a private person and feel more comfortable keeping my "business" to myself.

I was banded on April 8th, and have been able to explain my odd eating behavior as "just another diet" that I am trying.

Edited May 15, 2008 by lynzz
Did not make sense....

[eazes 0]

I haven't told my supervisor. I really don't plan on it. I know she would understand though. I just told her that I was going to have surgery in the next few months but I just don't when it is going to be. I have no intention on telling her.

[To be free 1]

I regret telling my Bunco "friends", a few told me I didn't need it, I just needed diet and willpower. One so called friend really gave me a new one and berated me in front of everyone so to speak.....on and on she has not stopped. There was only one that had known someone who has had the band and knows that it is only a tool and is really harder in many ways than regular dieting. But still I wish that I never said anything.

Now my family is very supportive, they have seen how all my life I have battled and suffered with my weight. Actually I have an easier time now days because its seems there are more overweight people and children than when I grew up.....I was the only fat kid in my class.......

So all in all I would if I could do it again is just tell family and very close friends.

[salsa1877 10]

I have told everyone! I am a high school teacher and when I started dropping weight FAST I knew I had to say something to my students and other teachers. I was new to the district so I didn't want people thinking I was doing drugs. I just make sure that I teach the people that I am telling about the band. I always somehow squeeze in there that I am changing the way I eat and going to the gym. They all know that I am training for a half-marathon so they understand that I have changed my lifestyle. I had one person ask me if I thought this was the easy way out. Well I filled them in on everything that we have to do as bandsters...they said...I would rather just diet...that seems like a lot of work.

[rondawood63 0]

Basically, I involved a select few at first when I was going through the process and then I found out 2 others in my office were doing the same thing. So we all kind of opened up about it.

Then when I got the call last week that I was approved, EVERYONE knew what was going on. I was so pumped!

I did feel bad for one girl though. She applied for the lapband through our insurance and was turned down because her BMI was too low. But she has hereditary HIGH Cholesterol that even medication is having issues in lowering and I think that right there should have been factored in. She was told she needed to gain 30lbs. to even qualify. So she wasn't willing to do that.

I felt alittle awkward in telling her my news but she heard me on the phone and came over and congratulated me and then said, she hated me! I knew she was joking though.

I would suggest telling your co-workers or at least the ones you are closest too, mine have really been supportive, asking questions and everything.

You go girl!