Come out of the band failure closet!

[brandyII 9]

I have never lost any weight with the band, just a few pounds in the the very early stages. I can understand wanting a place to talk to others about it. I have tried to find support before but when there really is nothing you are doing wrong people just don't believe it. Sometimes I go over and over the "rules" of the band trying to find what could possible going wrong but still no weight loss. I am considering a revision but I want to check to make sure there isnt another problem hiding somewhere. I do however understand wanting a place where people can come who have just simple not lost weight.

Thanks you for your honesty. Although many do very well it's a real problem for those of thus who don't. Like you I've tried to go over every aspect to see what issue is affecting my failure. I don't want to rush into anything and doubt my surgeon would let me anyway. I've made some changes and gone back on my diabetes II medication and am hoping that may have a positive effect. Good luck to you and let me know if anything changes, brandyII.

[BJean 16]

kat: I just re-read your post about your friend. I am beginning to think that for many people, having too much restriction is totally counter productive. I was doing fine again, losing slowly but finally losing again. I went in for a fill 2 weeks ago and now I'm really restricted and have not lost an ounce and have probably gained a little. That's with being able to eat less food. It is so frustrating to try to eat and not be able to get much down without having an episode. Afterwards you're totally unhappy, you don't feel that you've eaten and you tend to graze on small things that don't bother you - a few nuts here and there, a little ice cream, whatever... and the next thing you know you're back sliding and gaining. AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH! :biggrin:

[WestCoastFatGuy 3]

I know this is Rants and Raves so that's why I'm putting this topic here because I'm sure I will be ranted upon which isn't my point actually. Why are people made to feel afraid to come to this forum and discuss their band failures? When someone is searching out whys and what ifs they need a safe haven and I've gotten the impression the only way you can get people to talk about their personal problems with the band is by private messaging because they're too afraid to "come out of the my band is now working closet"

Would love to have them come out so I don't feel I'm alone here, thanks brandyII.:thumbup:

Alright, let me be the honest jack*ss and comes out to say exactly what so many on these boards are feeling and don't say because they are too nice or don't want to cause controversy:

Is it possible that the band isn't working because of an underlying medical issue? ABSOLUTELY! Is it very likely that the medical issue would have been uncovered BEFORE one resorted to the extreme measure of having SURGERY to install a BAND AROUND ONE'S STOMACH!?! Also, ABSOLUTELY! Is it possible that the medical condition that is causing one to not lose weight started AFTER the installation of the band? Possible? YES! LIKELY? NO! So... when someone comes on these boards complaining about how the band has failed them but they have been unable to uncover any medical reason for it... it is completely understandable that people would start asking questions about diet and exercise and drinking with meals, etc.

Here's the reality, folks. All us fatties have to face it (despite plateaus that may last for months)... that CALORIES IN MINUS CALORIES BURNED = NET CALORIC INTAKE. If we consume more than 3500 calories (net intake)... we're going to gain a pound or more of weight. Can we sometimes have stalls... and Water weight issues and complications that cause long long long plateaus? YES! Can we blame the band for them?!? Heck NO! We had them before the band and we'll have them with the band! Yo-Yo dieting is the one major item in our fat gaining/losing history that we all have to face will contribute to plateaus. It doesn't seem fair... but it's our burden to bear. We have to live with it. We can fight it with or without the band... but, personally, I'd rather do it WITH my band.

For those people who come on these boards and tell us that they went into this surgery expecting the band to STOP them from overeating... or STOP them from eating the wrong things?!?... I have to say... girlfriend... boyfriend... honey-child... You didn't do your freakin' research! So who the heck is to blame for that?!? If your surgeon told you otherwise... then you were STUPID to have believed him or her. There are dozens and dozens of lapband resources on the web (including this wonderful site) that would have told you otherwise.

I'm sorry if I have offended or hurt you.. but the reality has to be spelled out to all of us one day or another. I was (and still am) a fat freakin' slob who would rather sit his fat *ss on the couch and watch TV with a 2-liter of Coca-Cola and a platter of enchiladas than to have to watch my intake of foods and to give up carbonated beverages. I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE (get my point?) soda and other carbonated drinks! They were my solace... my lifeblood... my rock... my anchor.. my friend and lover. Coca-Cola was, in my old mind, created just for me. I would date its ugly step-sisters... Pepsi and Mountain Dew and Dr. Pepper occasionally... but my steady-friend was the red and white miracle of Coca-Cola. I probably ingested 5000 or more calories weekly just in my sweet bubbly lover. But... NOW? My band (and scars) remind me that soda helped to get me where I am and that I have to remember that and live with the realization that it can no longer provide me comfort when I am down. An occasional slushy coke (from my slushmug) that removes all the carbonation and has only 8-ounces and 100 calories? Sure. but to go back to what I used to consume? NEVER! The same applies to french fries and pizza and and and and and and.... two dozen other yummy high calorie items.

Can I consume those things and then come here and complain that my band isn't working for me? NO! I need to to wake up and smell the calories! Maybe if I couldn't get control of these food and beverage items I would have to seek counseling.. or a revision to another form of bariatric surgery. But that wouldn't be the fault of the band... that would be all of my own doing. I would have to accept responsiblity for my band failure and I wouldn't expect others to give me comfort and solace and understanding and praise for doing so.

With all that said... I only hope and pray that your band can start to align itself with your mind and metabolism (as it has with mine) so that you can begin to experience in your heart and mind the wonderful feeling of success! I would never wish you anything but that!

[BJean 16]

WCFG: WTF, do you REALLY think that all of us who've complained on this thread believed that the band would do all the work?

For most people what you've posted is absolutely true. I've read lots of posts where people say they've been able to figure out a way to eat pizza, drink cokes and perform other feats of band busting behavior. That's not what this particular post is all about. I notice that you don't get that. Okay fine. State your piece and feel all smug. That's to be expected from someone who has managed to figure it all out and develop into the lovely butterfly that I'm sure you're turning into. Congratulations! Do you feel better? Great. Now zip it.

What we're talking about here is something out of the norm. And the reason we're talking about it is because we're hoping that we can figure out why we're in the spot we're in. We've already sucked it up and learned that we can't drink cokes and eat pizza and all that. But we sure don't expect to be genuinely hungry most of the time, be so restricted that we can't eat almost anything, be exercising and still not seeing our weight move in a negative direction. But what am I doing? I shouldn't be trying to explain something to someone who just thinks anyone who is having these kinds of problems is simply sabbotaging their band. I hope you never learn about it the hard way.

[*JASMINE* 1]

WCFG,

I think you are just trying to offer some tough love. I think it's great that things are working out for you. They did for me the first year, as well. But what we are talking about is that there are restriction level issues that can really screw with our minds and weightloss goals.

I was floating on a pink cloud the first year I was banded. Three years later, I am living a different reality. When I read posts from people saying "40lbs lost, gone forever!!", I think to myself, "that's not true", I'm a great example of that. You can regain what you lose if the fills you are getting are too much, or not enough.

[taz 2]

Thanks Bjean. A very nice way of explaining the situation. We've all been "dieting" for years. I'm sure we know enough to write our own books on weight loss. It is not that we haven't lost weight this time. It is the same old problem of putting it back on. I'm having trouble again because my husband lost his job. As my surgeon would say, "What does that have to do with losing weight?" Nothing and everything. Financially we are okay, but not knowing where we will have to move for a new job, my daughter having one more year of school, my other in college here with one more year and not coming with us, and leaving ill parents behind. We also have to sell the stupid house. I find myself not planning and putting the effort in that is needed to lose weight. I know it is a lot of excuses. I still haven't given up. This thread helps me not give up. Thanks everyone.

Tina

[Keywestgirl 0]

WCFG Your loss is impressive:wink_smile: I am so happy for you. Soda wasn't my main vice but just eating in general. The last year when my father got really sick, and I was his only caregiver, I totally abandoned any exercise and diet of the month that I was doing and turned to food for comfort. Now that he has passed I am all about me and getting healthy again. Although I am mourning those All you can eat crab leg buffets at the many casinos we have in every direction, I know the feeling of finally fitting into my whole closet full of clothes which still have the tags on it, will taste so much better.

I liked your statement about the calories in vs. the calories out analogy. However I am a bit baffled. I lost 10 pounds like BAM overnight. (3 days postop) I started on reg foods, gained 2 pounds and lost it right back. What has me stumped is when I see posts about how people don't lose. If we restrict our bodies of too many calories (under 1200) doesn't our body go in starvation mode and try to hold onto every ounce of fat? Think back to when people hunted for their food. Or times of famine. That is how our bodies are constructed. I remember in a health class I took in college where they said you have to add fuel to a fire or it just fizzles out. So aren't we supposed to eat 4-5 small meals a day so our metabolism doesn't slow? (meaning it could be a simple shake or Protein bar, piece of cheese, whatever) I just don't think it is healthy to be soooo restricted that nothing normal doesn't go down. Are we supposed to drink our Fiber? I am 4 weeks banded exactly today. So please excuse my ignorance. I am just trying to figure out a plan of action. I did step up the exercise today. Finally a nice spring day. Walked 4 miles and cut the grass. I am feelin really motivated for once. Hopefully I see a drop on the scale.

Thanks to everyone and how candid you are. Weight loss is never easy whether you are 400 pounds or 200 pounds. As a newbie I am really excited to have such a great tool on my side to help me maintain my losses. Keep the faith everyone, tomorrow is a new day if today didn't go as expected.

[anonemouse 1]

Alright, let me be the honest jack*ss and comes out to say exactly what so many on these boards are feeling and don't say because they are too nice or don't want to cause controversy:

Is it possible that the band isn't working because of an underlying medical issue? ABSOLUTELY! Is it very likely that the medical issue would have been uncovered BEFORE one resorted to the extreme measure of having SURGERY to install a BAND AROUND ONE'S STOMACH!?! Also, ABSOLUTELY! Is it possible that the medical condition that is causing one to not lose weight started AFTER the installation of the band? Possible? YES! LIKELY? NO! So... when someone comes on these boards complaining about how the band has failed them but they have been unable to uncover any medical reason for it... it is completely understandable that people would start asking questions about diet and exercise and drinking with meals, etc.

Here's the reality, folks. All us fatties have to face it (despite plateaus that may last for months)... that CALORIES IN MINUS CALORIES BURNED = NET CALORIC INTAKE. If we consume more than 3500 calories (net intake)... we're going to gain a pound or more of weight. Can we sometimes have stalls... and Water weight issues and complications that cause long long long plateaus? YES! Can we blame the band for them?!? Heck NO! We had them before the band and we'll have them with the band! Yo-Yo dieting is the one major item in our fat gaining/losing history that we all have to face will contribute to plateaus. It doesn't seem fair... but it's our burden to bear. We have to live with it. We can fight it with or without the band... but, personally, I'd rather do it WITH my band.

For those people who come on these boards and tell us that they went into this surgery expecting the band to STOP them from overeating... or STOP them from eating the wrong things?!?... I have to say... girlfriend... boyfriend... honey-child... You didn't do your freakin' research! So who the heck is to blame for that?!? If your surgeon told you otherwise... then you were STUPID to have believed him or her. There are dozens and dozens of lapband resources on the web (including this wonderful site) that would have told you otherwise.

I'm sorry if I have offended or hurt you.. but the reality has to be spelled out to all of us one day or another. I was (and still am) a fat freakin' slob who would rather sit his fat *ss on the couch and watch TV with a 2-liter of Coca-Cola and a platter of enchiladas than to have to watch my intake of foods and to give up carbonated beverages. I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE (get my point?) soda and other carbonated drinks! They were my solace... my lifeblood... my rock... my anchor.. my friend and lover. Coca-Cola was, in my old mind, created just for me. I would date its ugly step-sisters... Pepsi and Mountain Dew and Dr. Pepper occasionally... but my steady-friend was the red and white miracle of Coca-Cola. I probably ingested 5000 or more calories weekly just in my sweet bubbly lover. But... NOW? My band (and scars) remind me that soda helped to get me where I am and that I have to remember that and live with the realization that it can no longer provide me comfort when I am down. An occasional slushy coke (from my slushmug) that removes all the carbonation and has only 8-ounces and 100 calories? Sure. but to go back to what I used to consume? NEVER! The same applies to french fries and pizza and and and and and and.... two dozen other yummy high calorie items.

Can I consume those things and then come here and complain that my band isn't working for me? NO! I need to to wake up and smell the calories! Maybe if I couldn't get control of these food and beverage items I would have to seek counseling.. or a revision to another form of bariatric surgery. But that wouldn't be the fault of the band... that would be all of my own doing. I would have to accept responsiblity for my band failure and I wouldn't expect others to give me comfort and solace and understanding and praise for doing so.

With all that said... I only hope and pray that your band can start to align itself with your mind and metabolism (as it has with mine) so that you can begin to experience in your heart and mind the wonderful feeling of success! I would never wish you anything but that!

I agree with this. I wouldn't have phrased it quite so strongly, lol, but I do agree with the gist of much of what was said.

Complaining of plateaus is legitimate. A plateau isn't the band's fault, though, and in many cases it isn't the person's fault, either. Sometimes, our bodies just have to take a while to adjust, and we may have to reevaluate what we're doing. Those people's bands have not failed, and those people are not generally band failures. Yes, some people do have underlying undiagnosed medical issues that prevent them from losing weight (Vinesqueen, for example, had Cushing's Syndrome). But, those people are going to be in the very tiny minority, as such difficult-to-diagnose diseases are pretty darn rare, in most cases. For many people, it really does come down to what you put in your mouth and what you make your body do. I can understand being upset about not losing weight, but it really isn't legitimate to place the blame for that on the band if you admit to eating the wrong foods and not exercising. Now, again, I wouldn't have phrased things in quite such an inflammatory manner as WCFG, but he has a point, if people bother to look past the rest of it.

And I know most of us hate the word I'm going to use, as we have all had it thrown in our faces too many times by thin people. Some times, it all comes down to having some self-control. I know it's not easy. But that's really what it boils down to at the very end, having the self-control NOT to do things that will just harm you in the end and to DO the things that will help you. Believe it or not, we will ALL have to use it, at one point or another, to be successful at banding. Experienced bandsters know how to eat around the band. They know what happens if they stop exercising. The ones that have been really, really successful have learned that they have to use self-control to stay away from "cheating" foods (or at least, limit their intake) and that they've got to exercise a certain amount. They probably don't like it, but they've got to do it or they'll start regaining weight. If it would help you retain some self-control to have a revision to another surgery, maybe that's the best course for you to take. But there is no guarantee that you won't be in the same situation after having that surgery. For example, not all bypass patients experience dumping syndrome, so if you revise to that surgery, don't go into it thinking that you're guaranteed to start feeling really icky if you eat something that you shouldn't.

[brandyII 9]

WCFG: WTF, do you REALLY think that all of us who've complained on this thread believed that the band would do all the work?

For most people what you've posted is absolutely true. I've read lots of posts where people say they've been able to figure out a way to eat pizza, drink cokes and perform other feats of band busting behavior. That's not what this particular post is all about. I notice that you don't get that. Okay fine. State your piece and feel all smug. That's to be expected from someone who has managed to figure it all out and develop into the lovely butterfly that I'm sure you're turning into. Congratulations! Do you feel better? Great. Now zip it.

What we're talking about here is something out of the norm. And the reason we're talking about it is because we're hoping that we can figure out why we're in the spot we're in. We've already sucked it up and learned that we can't drink cokes and eat pizza and all that. But we sure don't expect to be genuinely hungry most of the time, be so restricted that we can't eat almost anything, be exercising and still not seeing our weight move in a negative direction. But what am I doing? I shouldn't be trying to explain something to someone who just thinks anyone who is having these kinds of problems is simply sabbotaging their band. I hope you never learn about it the hard way.

Thanks BJean, been busy with the family thanks for having our backs!!!!:thumbup:

[brandyII 9]

WCFG,

I think you are just trying to offer some tough love. I think it's great that things are working out for you. They did for me the first year, as well. But what we are talking about is that there are restriction level issues that can really screw with our minds and weightloss goals.

I was floating on a pink cloud the first year I was banded. Three years later, I am living a different reality. When I read posts from people saying "40lbs lost, gone forever!!", I think to myself, "that's not true", I'm a great example of that. You can regain what you lose if the fills you are getting are too much, or not enough.

Jasmine, this guys obviously is still on his honeymoon with himself, thanks brandyII:thumbup:

[brandyII 9]

Thanks Bjean. A very nice way of explaining the situation. We've all been "dieting" for years. I'm sure we know enough to write our own books on weight loss. It is not that we haven't lost weight this time. It is the same old problem of putting it back on. I'm having trouble again because my husband lost his job. As my surgeon would say, "What does that have to do with losing weight?" Nothing and everything. Financially we are okay, but not knowing where we will have to move for a new job, my daughter having one more year of school, my other in college here with one more year and not coming with us, and leaving ill parents behind. We also have to sell the stupid house. I find myself not planning and putting the effort in that is needed to lose weight. I know it is a lot of excuses. I still haven't given up. This thread helps me not give up. Thanks everyone.

Tina

Taz this is why we're here and no one will ever shut us down because we want to succeed, and won't let someone who doesn't even know us tell us we're blaming a piece of plastic when that's is not it at all, good luck to you, brandyII:thumbup:

[brandyII 9]

WCFG Your loss is impressive:wink_smile: I am so happy for you. Soda wasn't my main vice but just eating in general. The last year when my father got really sick, and I was his only caregiver, I totally abandoned any exercise and diet of the month that I was doing and turned to food for comfort. Now that he has passed I am all about me and getting healthy again. Although I am mourning those All you can eat crab leg buffets at the many casinos we have in every direction, I know the feeling of finally fitting into my whole closet full of clothes which still have the tags on it, will taste so much better.

I liked your statement about the calories in vs. the calories out analogy. However I am a bit baffled. I lost 10 pounds like BAM overnight. (3 days postop) I started on reg foods, gained 2 pounds and lost it right back. What has me stumped is when I see posts about how people don't lose. If we restrict our bodies of too many calories (under 1200) doesn't our body go in starvation mode and try to hold onto every ounce of fat? Think back to when people hunted for their food. Or times of famine. That is how our bodies are constructed. I remember in a health class I took in college where they said you have to add fuel to a fire or it just fizzles out. So aren't we supposed to eat 4-5 small meals a day so our metabolism doesn't slow? (meaning it could be a simple shake or Protein bar, piece of cheese, whatever) I just don't think it is healthy to be soooo restricted that nothing normal doesn't go down. Are we supposed to drink our Fiber? I am 4 weeks banded exactly today. So please excuse my ignorance. I am just trying to figure out a plan of action. I did step up the exercise today. Finally a nice spring day. Walked 4 miles and cut the grass. I am feelin really motivated for once. Hopefully I see a drop on the scale.

Thanks to everyone and how candid you are. Weight loss is never easy whether you are 400 pounds or 200 pounds. As a newbie I am really excited to have such a great tool on my side to help me maintain my losses. Keep the faith everyone, tomorrow is a new day if today didn't go as expected.

KWG, good luck to you on you journey, it's not always easy but if you do ever have issues you should feel free to come here. We're not blaming the band for our problems but we are all different and for a lot of people they seem to sail through this thing but for some of us it's a lot tougher and we have added issues. Our surgeons have not been our doctors for years they're are surgeons so they don't necessarily know everything about each individual and there are things that come up that we don't expect. But if you do come across a problem or a stalemate or a weight gain that is uncontrollable for whatever reason you should have a safe place to come and talk to people about it without being considered a "band basher" which is not what we're about. Thanks brandyII:thumbup:

[brandyII 9]

I agree with this. I wouldn't have phrased it quite so strongly, lol, but I do agree with the gist of much of what was said.

Complaining of plateaus is legitimate. A plateau isn't the band's fault, though, and in many cases it isn't the person's fault, either. Sometimes, our bodies just have to take a while to adjust, and we may have to reevaluate what we're doing. Those people's bands have not failed, and those people are not generally band failures. Yes, some people do have underlying undiagnosed medical issues that prevent them from losing weight (Vinesqueen, for example, had Cushing's Syndrome). But, those people are going to be in the very tiny minority, as such difficult-to-diagnose diseases are pretty darn rare, in most cases. For many people, it really does come down to what you put in your mouth and what you make your body do. I can understand being upset about not losing weight, but it really isn't legitimate to place the blame for that on the band if you admit to eating the wrong foods and not exercising. Now, again, I wouldn't have phrased things in quite such an inflammatory manner as WCFG, but he has a point, if people bother to look past the rest of it.

And I know most of us hate the word I'm going to use, as we have all had it thrown in our faces too many times by thin people. Some times, it all comes down to having some self-control. I know it's not easy. But that's really what it boils down to at the very end, having the self-control NOT to do things that will just harm you in the end and to DO the things that will help you. Believe it or not, we will ALL have to use it, at one point or another, to be successful at banding. Experienced bandsters know how to eat around the band. They know what happens if they stop exercising. The ones that have been really, really successful have learned that they have to use self-control to stay away from "cheating" foods (or at least, limit their intake) and that they've got to exercise a certain amount. They probably don't like it, but they've got to do it or they'll start regaining weight. If it would help you retain some self-control to have a revision to another surgery, maybe that's the best course for you to take. But there is no guarantee that you won't be in the same situation after having that surgery. For example, not all bypass patients experience dumping syndrome, so if you revise to that surgery, don't go into it thinking that you're guaranteed to start feeling really icky if you eat something that you shouldn't.

You really shouldn't take this so personally, there are a group of us, whether we are the minority or not who deserve a safe place to discuss problems we are having with the band!!!!!

If you do not have a problem you need not use this thread. It is a safe haven for people to help each, support each other as they go through various issues they've had since they were banded.

You don't know what everyone's issue is, whether it is physical, mental, emotional or a plastic device. Not everyone has Cushing's Disease. We all have high expectations or we would not have been banded in the first place. We did not pay $30,000 each plus or minus a few$$$$$ to "diet" like we had failed many, many, many times before. What right do you have to legitimize one person's failure over another's?

We all chose the band because we were sold a savior that was going to fix our dieting failures. No one jumped into this lightly, it was well planned out, we were all screened, we all researched and we paid a lot of money for something that has disappointed us. I've saw the Lap Band commercial twice today on TV, it showed obese people who wanted to lose weight, it did not say, hey, it's still going to be just as hard as sh&t to lose weight after the band than it was prior to being banded.

Not everyone goes on forums prior to getting the lap band, no one ever told me to do that. It wasn't until after I started having problems that during my research this forum came up.

If a person has "self control" in the first place they don't need a band, that's not what we were sold!!! Trust me this thread is only going to grow as people are not afraid to come out of the band closet like the lap band elitists" think they should be locked into. I still have a difficult time understanding why it upsets so many of you that people who are having problems with their lap band need a place to converse and get support!!! We're trying to get through a tough situation and work it out without revision or with revision depending on the persons' situation.

I doubt any of us would ever take a revision lightly! After trusting that the lap band was going to be our saving grace do you think we'd just go and jump into another surgery? I don't think so. Most of us are trying to do the best we can by supporting each other with helpful ideas and not by acting like assh:angry:les to each other, thanks for the support brandyII:thumbdown:

Edited May 17, 2008 by brandyII

[WestCoastFatGuy 3]

Okay folks... here's the scoop. If you do a search on all my previous posts you'll find that I don't usually post such "inflammatory" things. But... the reality is... sometimes when we get really really p*ssed at what someone says or writes... it energizes us. It makes us soooo freakin' mad that we want to prove that "so-and-so" wrong. Whether you agree with my approach or not... that's what my intention was and is.

For you people who think that the lapband has been a "honeymoon" for me... I'm happy that you can think so. It has been anything BUT a honeymoon, which my soulmate lapband-friend GillieBean can attest to from our dozens of PMs to each other.

For the poster who said that we can't restrict ourselves too much when it comes to calories? You're ABSOLUTELY right! For some people 1200 calories is too restrictive. For others it might be 1800. For me.. I have found that if I don't take in 1500-2000 calories per day... my weight loss stalls. Some people reading this may 'gasp' at that high number of calories... but when I consume less than that.. I stop losing weight.

Instead of getting all freaked out about some lines in my post... instead take it for the 'whole' of what it is. Do I believe that every person that has been unsuccessful with the band went into it believing that the band would be their "cure"? NO! Do I believe that there are a significant number of those who did so? Yes. And you know that it is true.

For the poster who said that.. if they had willpower... they wouldn't have gotten the band in the first place... I have to say... I'm very sorry that you weren't better informed by your surgeon. Anything in life takes some willpower. It SUCKS! It's NOT FREAKIN' FAIR that some skinny-*ssed b*tches (male or female) can eat anything that they want and not gain an ounce.... and then there are those of us who can walk past a glass of Water and gain a pound! I HATE IT! YOU HATE IT! It hurts to our core! But the reality is.... we HAVE to do what WE HAVE to do to make a change in our lives. WE have chosen the lapband. The lapband, despite what so many of those anti-surgery people say and believe, doesn't make it EASY! In some ways it makes it harder! We aren't able to eat so many of those comfort foods that made us feel vital... that make us feel human... that made us feel alive. THAT SUCKS! IT HURTS! IT MAKES US CRY INSIDE!

So what to do? We do WHATEVER we have to do to make the changes in our lives. For some that will be revision surgery to another type of bariatric procedure. For others it will be kicking our band's *ss and MAKING it work for us despite the fact that we need to seek counseling or support or whatever it takes to add the willpower to what the band will agree to help us with.

For those that were offended and felt that I was saying that EVERYONE who has the band fail them was a loser or didn't work hard enough or was a quitter.. I sincerely apologize. I was truly speaking to the hearts of only those people who were choosing to give up or give in or let the world of the 'perfect bodies' beat them! I believe that even amongst those of you who are angry at me that you may sense of spark of truth in what I say. For those of you who don't... I again offer my apologies from my heart. All I ever would want is for every one of us to achieve our goals and find an end to the world of pain that we have all felt.

I hope that you can find it in your hearts and minds to believe me.

[green 6]

I really enjoyed reading this post. Thanks, WestCoast.