Seriously having second thoughts

[Carrie_C 9]

From what I have been reading, it seems like a lot of people go through this, but I am seriously having second thoughts about having this surgery. I actually can't believe I feel this way. It took me 3 months to get Cigna to approve it, and I was even denied twice. I was approved last week, and I thought I would be happy, but I am not. I have a lot of problems with IBS and nausea now, and I am worried that it will get worse with the band. I just got accepted into RN school for the fall, and I am scared I will be sick all the time with the band and have to drop out of school. A million thoughts are going through my mind about being sick all the time. I also keep thinking of all the reasons to have the surgery. I am 5'7 and I weigh 255 pounds. I have arthritis in both knees. Diabetes and heart disease are very strong in my family. Plus, it would be nice to be able to wear a bathing suit next summer. But everytime I think about the good, I start being afraid that I am going to be sick all the time. I also keep thinking about all the money I have to pay. I have not told anyone but my husband that I am having surgery, and I am scared to even tell my mother. My surgery is scheduled for May 22. I am very confused and could really use some advice.

[travelinsnorkel 0]

I am getting ready to meet with the surgeon for the first time on Wednesday and I feel the same way! What if this surgery just makes things worse and I feel terrible? I'm hoping he will clear up a lot of my questions and it seems like this is the natural course of things, to have doubts and question things...good luck!

[brandyII 9]

Carrie,

I know you're worried. A lot of us have second thoughts but to be honest with you, I don't have IBS and am more constipated than anything so I wonder if your symptoms with IBS would change. I have to take a lot of benifiber just to get things moving and I take it in my cup of tea. I'm also on an anti depressant which I believe tends to constipate you also. I know TMI but that's what we're here for.

The vomiting that most people go through if they over eat or eat too fast or don't chew well enough isn't like the vomiting that we're used to when we have the flu. It's much higher up and the food isn't really digested so in some ways it's much easier although none of us want to vomit most of us have had occasion to.

My daughter was worried because she said she had a strong gag reflex and didn't want the lap band like I have and is having the gastric bypass but that's her decision and I'm supporting her wishes with that.

I had to cancel my lap band the first time two years prior to getting mine in 8/07 because of other people's issues that I had to deal with. Maybe if I had the surgery then I'd be thin by now. It has taken me a while to get used to the band and get it working but so far I seem to be doing well.

My surgery went like clockwork and recovery was a breeze and I don't consider myself sick all the time and doubt most people do on this forum, so read more from people and talk to your surgeon if you have worries, I think it's normal and you're making a lot of major changes in your life right now. Good luck brandyII.

[texgirl 0]

I have IBS and since I got the band my symptoms have been so much better. I did go through a period during the liquid stage that I went all the time. I realized that along with the IBS I am also lactose intolerant. Since I've been limiting my lactose things have been so much better. I am having "normal" bms for the first time in years

[carol4784 0]

was banded 4/8/08. Self pay. Ins. excludes weight loss surgery. Am doing well...have lost at least 20#. This was just my experience but I had some serious IBS previously. I took 4 Bentyl a day....rarely made it thru a meal w/o heading to facilities. Was not a fun travel companion. Have not taken Bentyl since 4/7. Haven't needed medication. IBS seems to be quieted down. Hope it stays that way. Diabetes and heart disease run in my family too. In fact I've had 5 way heart bypass surgery in 2005. I'd say....go for it..you have already been accepted. Husband is very supportive, parents and siblings are also very supportive. Do the reasons to have the surgery outweigh the reasons not to have it? Good luck in your decision.

[shaunni78 1]

You know what? I was banded on 3/10/08, and i was having second thoughts when I came to this site. I was hearing people having so many problems that I thought all of that stuff was going to happen to me. A friend told me not to even come back to this site until after I experienced the surgery for myself....And he was right....Most of the issues other people had, I didn't have. That's not to say that this site isn't helpful, because it totally is, but you just have to remember that everyone's situation is different. Kinda like childbirth...One person will tell you how horrible it is and the next person will say it's a breeze...Most problems with the band are brought on by people not following directions, anyway. But get the band....It will make you sooo better!!! Hope this helps!

[Carrie_C 9]

Thanks everyone. I don't have much of a problem with Constipation with my IBS, it is more nausea and diarrhea. I can deal with the diarrhea, but the nausea is what bothers me. I take Alka Seltzer now for it, but I know I won't be able to take that after the band. I guess that's one thing that bothers me. What does everyone else take post band for nausea?

I agree that it is a good idea not to visit the board much preband. I don't read the 'complications' section anymore. I was also on youtube, and there were videos there of people who had problems with the band and had to have it removed, and they were still fat! I guess that is another thing that bothers me, going through the surgery and then not losing weight.

I think I will feel better once I tell my Mom an everyone about it. I am just worried they won't be supportive.

[brandyII 9]

Hi Carrie,

I was just wondering if maybe your IBS may change after the band and I guess your surgeon is the best one for that advice.

I found those kind of sites as I was searching for answers as to why I was having problems losing weight on the band. This forum has actually helped me through my issues and I'm on the right track. Most people on this forum seem a lot more successful than I had been so still talk to your surgeon.

I had to go through a lot of mental and physical screenings before they'd even do the surgery. Anyway good luck to you brandyII.

[deepinfl 0]

Carrie..I have extremely bad IBS. For the 1st month after the surgery, I had the runs constantly..worse than "usual". But, now..10 weeks out and I feel fabulous and guess what? My IBS is BETTER!! I have been dealing with this my whole life (the IBS) and I can't believe it is actually better! Plus, I have lost 52 pounds!!! So..no regrets! I must admit, however that I was reading lots of posts before my surgery and I started to get nervous about what I was reading. So, I decided to quit reading them till after the surgery. Now, I'm reading them again AND never never never any regrets about the surgery..it is nothing but WOW!!!

[MissMom24 2]

I can definately say that I too, was having 2nd thoughts. But I also knew that I could not go on like this. So, I went ahead with it. You know what? The best decision of my life!!

I was banded 12/12, am dow 60 pounds and am only 35 from goal!!

Even though the nerves can get you, look at where you will be 3, 6, 9 even a year from now.

[BandedInNY 1]

I just had my surgery yesterday morning. I had second thoughts while being prepped for surgery. I even said to my self more than a dozen times after surgery, "why did I do this". I feel much better today and I am thankful I went through it. Now that I am creeping up on 40 years old, my body does not drop the weight like I used to. Plus I keep thinking that I can lose the weight on my own but I cannot keep it off. This is a great tool that will help my reach and maintain my goal so I can get my life back.

I think everyone has some kind of second thoughts at one point but most people are so glad they went through with it. Hang in there.

[Neeley 0]

OH Carrie you are the majority not the minority. I found I had to stop reading the boards before surgery too. Now I am coming up on my first fill and have to stop reading the boards about fills because they have me freaked out again.

A good friend from here and someone who has been banded along time told me months ago: "Generally people who post on the board are having issues and looking for answers, the ones who are doing great and are 2 years out are not posting on the boards they are busy living their new life" Makes sense when you think about it. Good luck which ever way you go, you will be fine!

[grammylew 0]

I had IBS and was on prescription meds for heartburn for YEARS before my surgery. 7 months out and not a problem one with any of those things. I take my metamucil daily to stay regular. Before my surgery the only person I REALLY listened to was the one who had actually had the surgery and I knew personally. I've never been "sick" since the band. I threw up once and was pretty stuck once and had to wait it out. When I get too full or sorta stuck, or forget and drink something with me meal, if I just bend over the sink, it flows right back out. No gagging, no vomiting, no pressure, just bend over and open my mouth! That has only happened 3 times in my 7 months though! Twice in a restaurant when I unconciously drank from my Water glass while eating - you'd think I'd have learned! Anyway, my advice would be either don't read this stuff before banding (but don't keep your head in the sand, research docs and stats, etc), and if you know someone personally that you can talk to IN PERSON (on the phone), do it. These forums are great for getting a "feel" for what everyone else is experiencing. But when push comes to shove and you are worrying, or have a question, or a stuck episode you want someone to TALK to NOW (even at 2 AM). That's what friends with bands are for! Not for medical advice, but common sense, this is what I feel, did you ever have this happen, what did you do, is this normal and DON'T LAUGH AT ME I KNOW I SHOULDN'T HAVE GULPED THOSE GRAPES EVEN THOUGH YOU WARNED ME ABOUT THAT KIND OF THING!

Good luck, this decision is yours to make, look at the big picture, your future of running through RN school, instead of stumbling through on arthritic knees!

[mstrina27 0]

From what I have been reading, it seems like a lot of people go through this, but I am seriously having second thoughts about having this surgery. I actually can't believe I feel this way. It took me 3 months to get Cigna to approve it, and I was even denied twice. I was approved last week, and I thought I would be happy, but I am not. I have a lot of problems with IBS and nausea now, and I am worried that it will get worse with the band. I just got accepted into RN school for the fall, and I am scared I will be sick all the time with the band and have to drop out of school. A million thoughts are going through my mind about being sick all the time. I also keep thinking of all the reasons to have the surgery. I am 5'7 and I weigh 255 pounds. I have arthritis in both knees. Diabetes and heart disease are very strong in my family. Plus, it would be nice to be able to wear a bathing suit next summer. But everytime I think about the good, I start being afraid that I am going to be sick all the time. I also keep thinking about all the money I have to pay. I have not told anyone but my husband that I am having surgery, and I am scared to even tell my mother. My surgery is scheduled for May 22. I am very confused and could really use some advice.

Well congratulations on the decision to take your life back first of all... You wanted it so bad u faught for it so now that you have won 1/2 of the battle why quit now... I was told that you can take the benifiber or metamaucil (sp) to allow u to have a movement. I take Fiber everyother day so my system will be regular. We are all afraid of the unknown.. but at this point by loosing the weight that will help in improving your quality and quanity of life..... So shake the doubt off and keep it moving....:coolgleamA:

[barbara9460 1]

It's up to you - if you get upset by reading the boards, that's up to you. If you use the boards for information and sources for possible questions, then that's up to you too.

What you're going through is completely normal. Really - perfectly normal. I get banded 5/9 and I go thru periods of self-doubt too. Each time ask yourself why you're doing it.

Barbara