Petrified

[Kalipso2 25]

my surgery is a week from today and i'm so scared. i think about canceling at least 10 times a day. i've just started preparing for the surgery and i think that is what has me so anxious.

i've been a binge eater for years and used to take a lot of laxatives to rid myself of the food i would eat during binging. i have been in therapy and haven't used laxatives in almost a year but the binging has still been there and my weight has increased this past year. i'm now at my all time high.

i'm scared about the surger itself. i've never had to stay overnight at a hospital. i've never been put under. i've never had a breathing tube down my throat. i've never even had an IV before.

i haven't had a great relationship with my mom. she and i just started talking again this past christmas after an entire year of silence. she and my dad are taking me for my surgery and i'll be staying with them for a day or two afterwards. the hospital is 4 hours away and i'll be spending a lot of time with my mom when we're still on rocky ground.

being a binge eater and getting banded is going to be extremely hard. what am i going to do to replace the comfort of binging? i'm afraid of giving in to a binge and having my band slip.

help!!!

[dg2tex69 0]

I'm scared too -- my surgery is April 17 and I just got so angry at my Mom because she told my negative aunt about my surgery! I even ate some chips knowing good/well that i should not have but the good thing is that I stopped. The fear is there for me too but the greater fear is getting fatter and diabetic with all the other chronic diseases associated with obesity. We will BOTH DO WELL and our LIVES will be GREAT. Keep in touch and I'll let you know how it comes out. Take care and I'll keep you in my thoughts.

[bainkimt 0]

I was scared to death too. I had never had surgery in my life. I had the same thoughts, even while they were wheeling me down to surgery.

I have to say that it was very easy. I had a little discomfort after surgery (I can't describe it as pain.) I was off of work for 4 days. I had the surgery on a Tuesday and I returned the following Monday. I had my first fill today and I've lost 20.5 pounds so far. Please keep the faith. I already feel so much better.

[jlwalker79 0]

I understand being scared, too! My surgery is 5-12. But dg2tx is sooo right. This will change the rest of our lives~~~ FOREVER~~~. Positive thoughts are the key here, I think. I will be praying for you both.

~~jessi~~

[diamonds-4-u 0]

I had never had surgery either, I was so scared. You won't remember a thing. You will be sore after, like you did 100 sit ups. But in a week you will be all better. Two weeks after surgery I did binge, only it was different...instead of the box of thin mints, I had THREE Cookies. I've never ate just three of anything. HaHa

I am 3 days after my first fill and think this is the best thing ever! I've not gotten sick, and I eat until full, I just eat lots less. food doesn't have control of me anymore. I LOVE IT and you will too...you wouldn't be this far if you weren't fed up with being fat. ( or thick as my doctor puts it. Hee Hee) By the way, I thought the fill would hurt! NO WAY!

You'll be fine! Let your parents take care of you just like they always loved to do long ago.

[TulipStar 2]

Hey kalipso,

I know it is a scary time, but you will get through it. You will have to find other things to replace your binges. Take up a new hobby and when you feel a binge, do that instead of bingeing. Also, deal with the emotion you are feeling that is making you want to binge. Recognizing the emotion I was having has helped me a lot. Before I didn't realize why I was doing it, but now I ask myself what I am "feeling" and realize that I was trying to stuff my emotions with food.

You are going to do great. Surgery will be fine. You can do this!!

[niki 1]

Guess we've all been there.

You'll just have to face your fears and start learning how to better control yourself and head hunger. You've taken the first step, now it is time to put one foot after the other and proceed with the journey.

Come here to LBT for support or whenever you're feeling down.

Give yourself a chance. You'll be fine,

best of luck,

niki

[Boo Boo Kitty 3]

Kris--I know I felt like you before surgery. I think most of us do. The band is life changing for us, and that is scary. But I can tell you that my life is so much better now. I am thankful everyday for the band. It was the best decision I ever made. It is normal to be scared, but don't let it control you. If you want a different, healthy life than the band is for you!

This is a good place to come when you are scared, friends can help you here!

[skculpepper 0]

I too, was scared to death. I can promise you, it is the best decision I have ever made in my life. Now, grant it, I thought the first few days after surgery, "What the HELL have I just done to myself". It only lasted a few days. I had surgery on January 25, and I am down 43 lbs. It is all worth it. Good Luck to all of you!!!!

[giveyouthemoon 4]

Oh man...I was so scared. Right up to the moment I laid down on the operating table I was like "I can leave....I can leave". I had never been in a hospital before. I was scared so much! But it turned out great!

As for the binge eating part. That is really tough stuff. The band is both a help and a hindrance for that. I was a recovered bulimic when I got my band and about two years in the bulimia was back really bad.

The ONLY way you can do this is with the help of a therapist. Don't go down this road without some help, ok?

Best luck!!!

[jnbwilds 0]

I understand your fears! Here's my 2 cents - the surgery is a breeze. Remember that laproscopic surgery is much less invasive and that you won't be under for very long at all. I was surprised by how quick and easy it was.

As for binging - I have been a binge eater for the last 6 or 7 years - and flirted with bulimia off and on also. So far, with the band I haven't had any problems. I attribute that to 2 things. First - I got help a few years ago through counseling and medication. Getting professional assistance with your addiction will help you a great deal! Second - having the band really takes all the fun out of a binge! You're not nearly as hungry anymore - and if you do overeat, you'll feel gross - gassy, bloated and sometimes even have food stuck.

Stay motivated by reading success stories on this forum - and hang in there! Good luck....

[Kalipso2 25]

i want to thank you all for your support!! i mean that from the bottom of my heart. as i was growing up, i learned to hide all my emotions as well as my eating habits. i have always been the "strong" one with my family and friends. it was easier solving their problems instead of talking about my own.

when i made the decision to have this surgery i knew i had to open up and tell my family and friends that the person that they've known all these years was not the real me. everyone was shocked to learn about my binging and purging... and they still don't really understand, but that's okay.

i have the support of my parents, siblings and close friends... and now everyone here!! i had to ask my family for help and when i saw that no one was going to turn their back on me or judge me it changed a lot of things for me and helped me SO much more than any past therapy session ever has.

after all these years of pretending to be strong, i think i might actually feel a bit stronger. a lot of that has to do with reading every one's encouragement here. i've felt alone for so many years and now i feel so much better knowing that there are people out there who have been where i am... who know what i'm feeling... who have given their support to someone they don't know.

thank you all!!