Total meltdown yesterday - just venting

[Long2BFree 12]

I'm supposed to be on a diet to lose 14 lbs before surgery and had be doing well before I went out to dinner with DH Wednesday night. When we got to the restaurant I looked at the menu and there wasn't anything that I should've really ate and asked to go some place else but DH really wanted to eat there. I did okay with my choice but didn't feel good about eating it because I knew it would throw me off. It's 100% on or else I have a hard time with getting back on once I deviate.

For lunch on Friday and Saturday, I had Subway and would've been okay except I ordered the footlong subs because they were having a special. I told myself I would only eat half and save the rest for lunch the following day. Both days I did neither. Last night I was so hungry (mainly cause my sub sandwich was only veggies at lunch) and I started having major anxiety. I guess my blood sugar level got too low and I totally lost it and had a major pig out even eating the ice cream my family brought into the house after everyone went to bed. I don't know why I did this to myself. Right now I'm kicking myself because I just put myself that much further away from my surgery date until I get the 14 lbs off.

Oh, and DH looked at me in the restaurant on Wednesday and it dawned on him that once I have the surgery that I will no longer be able to eat like I have been. Duh, why does he think I'm so fat? Because I have no control.

[*susan* 1,709]

I am sorry you have been struggling. What is important that you recognized what you did, and now you get back on track, lose that 14 pounds and get your band. You can do this, and don't let anyone get in your way.

[chrisssssy 0]

I am sorry that you are having such a hard time losing the 14 pounds! I am sure you will do it!! I think maybe the best thing for you to do is stay out of restaurants all together so you cant be tempted! Good luck to you and know that it is going to be so worth it in the end! : )

[sfeiner 2]

Yes, stay out of restruaants for now. Why torture yourself? Maybe you should do the liquid diet some people have to do before surgery. I didn't so I can't tell you what it is but I bet someone can,

[dancinglamb 0]

Maybe you need to have a talk with your husband about what's going on - both from your perspective AND his. But not when tempers are flared or when emotions are running high.

Tell him about how you feel he (and your other family members) are sabotaging your efforts by doing stuff like bringing home ice cream, etc. I would just be careful to do it in a manner that's not accusatory. Make certain that it's coming FROM you, but not AT him, kwim?

Then ask him what his deal is. Is he threatened? Does he feel like you're going to leave him once you're thin? Maybe this is his underhanded way of ensuring you won't do that.

People don't like change. Positive or negative. It's much easier to just 'be'. But I think that if you put it in a manner of, "look, I'm doing this with or without you - BUT, it would be a hell of a LOT easier if you'd support me. And I know that you love me, so I can't understand why you wouldn't", he might be more willing to do so.

As far as the Subway thing goes, a deal isn't a deal if it's not the best thing for you. Kind of like buying something at costco on sale isn't saving money if it's not something you would've bought in the first place. :biggrin: Right now, you need to think with your brain and not your pocketbook. I know, I know. It kills me too. But you'd be a lot better off with Protein than veggies. Not only will it keep your blood sugar and hunger level constant, it will help you lose the 14lbs faster.

And finally. The restaurant. What kind was it that you couldn't eat the food? Unfortunately, we - as bandsters (future or otherwise) are ALWAYS going to come up against this sort of thing. We just need to make smart choices. There's nothing wrong with asking for one or two appetizers instead of a big fat entree, or having Soup and a salad. Or just asking them to put sauce to the side. Yeah, it might seem a little like "When Harry Met Sally", but right now, who cares. Chances are, you'll never see those people again. And what's more important? Somebody in the kitchen thinking you're a bite in the ass, or meeting your goal?

Hugs! You'll get there!!!

-m

Edited April 13, 2008 by dancinglamb

[Long2BFree 12]

Thank you so much for all of the support! I appreciate the input more than anyone can ever know.

Restaurants are going to be off limits for me for awhile unless I am 100% sure they have something I can eat. The one we went to the other night offered foods with gravies, sauces, fatty meats and fried. I did order a salad with dressing on the side but the meat was very fatty so I only ate a couple of bits and had tons of blue cheese on it. In fact, I didn't use any dressing on it because of the amount of cheese. I wanted Soup but they only had cheesy potato soup that night.

DH is not worried that I will leave him when I lose weight nor does he sabatoge my efforts on purpose. He mindlessly brings stuff into the house even though I've asked him not to; sometimes because he's ignorant but sometimes because he just 'wants it'. Though he will agree that certain foods aren't good for our bodies, he still insists on bringing them into the house. His thought is if he dies from clogging his arteries then at least he will be happy.

I've told myself that today I'm doing my 5 Protein shakes and 1 meal and nothing is going to stop me from doing it. I've already announced to everyone this morning that we will be having salmon for dinner so they better no complain.

[bigpapa2 0]

I am in the same boat with you. I am not on a liquid diet before my surgery, I just have to lose some weight. Lucky for me, my wife has joined Weight Watchers and is trying to lose weight also. We do the Subway thing two ($5 12in. sub) and we split it. I have gotten to the point where I can eat half of my 6in. sub and save the rest for later. I get a little turkey on my sub with veggies, so I get a little protien. I also have my medical weight loss protien bars that I eat between meals. If you get a chance to check out some of the resturants, they do have low carb meals on their menues. My wife and I have also found it nice to walk together without our children, its a nice way to spend time with each other and also get our exercise in. My wife put together a cabinet in our kitchen that has only our diet food for us, so our children still have a little bit of junk food, but are not allowed in our cupboard. For that late night ice cream fix, that we just have to have, we enjoy the chocolate ice cream bars from Weight Watchers.

[dancinglamb 0]

Thank you so much for all of the support! I appreciate the input more than anyone can ever know.

Restaurants are going to be off limits for me for awhile unless I am 100% sure they have something I can eat. The one we went to the other night offered foods with gravies, sauces, fatty meats and fried. I did order a salad with dressing on the side but the meat was very fatty so I only ate a couple of bits and had tons of blue cheese on it. In fact, I didn't use any dressing on it because of the amount of cheese. I wanted Soup but they only had cheesy potato soup that night.

DH is not worried that I will leave him when I lose weight nor does he sabatoge my efforts on purpose. He mindlessly brings stuff into the house even though I've asked him not to; sometimes because he's ignorant but sometimes because he just 'wants it'. Though he will agree that certain foods aren't good for our bodies, he still insists on bringing them into the house. His thought is if he dies from clogging his arteries then at least he will be happy.

I've told myself that today I'm doing my 5 Protein shakes and 1 meal and nothing is going to stop me from doing it. I've already announced to everyone this morning that we will be having salmon for dinner so they better no complain.

Well, it's good to hear that he's not intentionally being a jerk about the food thing. Maybe if you told him what it is that you need him to do, he'll be more helpful. Sometimes, they really are just *that* clueless, that you have to spell it out for them.:biggrin:

And if he insists on bringing stuff into the house, maybe you can persuade him to only bring in enough for himself so that there aren't any leftovers. Tell him to go get in the car and take a ride to Dunkin Donuts or Friendlys or wherever if he RREALLLLY needs that fix. It will taste that much better when the hot fudge is hot. (sorry!)

And Girlie - I'm so jealous. You get FIVE shakes AND a meal?!!!!! I get three shakes and 64oz of Clear liquids. If I'm really nudgy, I can add a *little* bit of lean Protein, though they prefer that I don't. *sigh*.

If I can get through this with a preschooler, toddler, and roly-poly husband, so can you!!! :thumbup:

-m

And Jeez, what restaurant was that? The only one I can think of was Cracker Barrel and even then (as rarely as I go there - only 2 in a 2hr radius), I love their food, so it can't be there!:biggrin:

[Long2BFree 12]

Marisa - I wish it was Cracker Barrel I was talking about. Unfortunately we don't have them in CA. The restaurant is a local steak house that opened up within the past year called Cool Hand Luke's.

[kristylyn 0]

I'm supposed to be on a diet to lose 14 lbs before surgery and had be doing well before I went out to dinner with DH Wednesday night. When we got to the restaurant I looked at the menu and there wasn't anything that I should've really ate and asked to go some place else but DH really wanted to eat there. I did okay with my choice but didn't feel good about eating it because I knew it would throw me off. It's 100% on or else I have a hard time with getting back on once I deviate.

For lunch on Friday and Saturday, I had Subway and would've been okay except I ordered the footlong subs because they were having a special. I told myself I would only eat half and save the rest for lunch the following day. Both days I did neither. Last night I was so hungry (mainly cause my sub sandwich was only veggies at lunch) and I started having major anxiety. I guess my blood sugar level got too low and I totally lost it and had a major pig out even eating the ice cream my family brought into the house after everyone went to bed. I don't know why I did this to myself. Right now I'm kicking myself because I just put myself that much further away from my surgery date until I get the 14 lbs off.

Oh, and DH looked at me in the restaurant on Wednesday and it dawned on him that once I have the surgery that I will no longer be able to eat like I have been. Duh, why does he think I'm so fat? Because I have no control.

.

Sorry to hear about that. I was the same way, but I didn'teat everything, i would nibble on different things. I have been on the liquid diet for 7 days and I went weight myself on that 7th day and I lost 16 pounds..I was so proud of myself. My surgery is tomorrow on the 14 and I am still on the liquid diet. Mine calls for 3 slim fast or advantage or edge a day, SF Jello, unlimited, SF Popcicles, unlimited, 64 oz of Water, and chicken broth unlimited..I stuck with that, and I lost. Now It also says on my paper that if I get dizzy or weak, that I can have a 3oz chicken breast, or side salad, or veggies..So The other day I started eatting me a salad for super and that would hold me off until the next day. I wasn't that hungery then and still today I am not that hungery. I think you can do it..Just put your mind to it like I did and you will come around. I had to put in my mind that once I have the band in, then I will be able to eat real food again but smaller. I was just like you and when I saw the food I wanted it and when I went eat out with hubby I just said " Oh well I will pick up tomorrow"..So I got the hang of eatting, well you can say "drinking" my stuff and I lost 16 lbs. So maybe you can try what I drink and see if that helps you out..Hope this helps! Take care!!

Kristy

[mstrina27 0]

u know what it dosent matter how fat u may be. The bottom line is, is that he know what u are trying to do. And he's going to have to make better choices also. There are somethings u all are going to have to do for a good time and going out and making bad food choices are not one of them.

[innwtitdtity 57]

Hang in there, my DH is stressing me too with similar issues. I am just starting out on my journey, so I don't have any suggests, but I know sometimes it helps just to know there are others out there in the same boat. Good luck on your journey.

[LoraLei 0]

Hey!! I have ben doing the liquid hi Protein diet for 14 days. I have dropped somebut my surgeon did not a specific amount lost, they did not focus on that. ihave found is it also gets you mentally adjusted for the changes you are about to make. food has controlled all our lives. I used myolean powder mix (vanilla with 1/2 no sugar added apple juice & H2o) I focused on drinking 3 20 oz bottles of Water a day & 5 shakes. I cheated 1x with 1/4 to 1/2 cup ramen noodle crap. I was so remorseful. Expect to get bad breath cause you are in ketosis, some tiredness and to feel the cold more than usual. Thats my experience.. My surgery is tomorrow. Please do not be discouraged, the liquid is the best way...smaller liver quicker recovery time, less pain so I have read. Did you ask your doc why 14 lbs? Please stay on board, & you will make it happen. My DH wouldn't even eat in front of me...bless him. Stay brave.....you can & will do this. I can not believe mine is tomorrow!!

[Lap_dancer 8]

Your name says it all. Long2BFree. We all long to be free.

You are taking the steps to get there and reaching out to others is a great step.

Watch the carbs as in the breading on the sub. Yeah. Carbs rock my socks. I can get a *high* from too many carbs and I suspect by the days after you were getting the hungrys. Carbs do that to me.

Power up on Protein. Honestly, you do what it takes and for awhile you have to just make YOU a priority and if that means leaving a restaurant because nothing fits the plan then so be it.

[cleanteeth 1]

Hi there! I didn't read all the replys, because there are a bunch. I can tell you that once I made the decision to do this..(with hubby's approval and backing) I have been eating myself into 6 more pounds! It is the last step for me to realize just how much an emotional eater I am. I'm so over the whole food thing and ready to get healthy! We all need to realize (we being ME) that food is to make our body work and be healthy.. not for fun and enjoyment. Food is fuel.. not anything else. It can taste good.. don't get me wrong.. but it doesn't neet to be comfort. it needs to be fuel.