the rudeness of others

[drod309 0]

Ladies Ladies,,,,please take it easy on us...we arent all that bad....

[Hazel-eyes 0]

This is why I did not tell anyone about my surgery. Last night I was at a party and my SIL came up to me and said "OH my gosh, what is on you face???!!!!"" and went into how there was something pink above my eyebrows and what is it, etc. I felt like I was some sort of ugly monster. Granted she is 25 and very immature, she is a teacher and should know how to act by now. Looking in a mirror a short time later, there was NOTHING on my face and I was just baffled and still can't stop thinking about how she wants me to feel BAD about myself. Can you imagine if I would had told her and the rest of my in-laws about my lap-band?????

[girlie2shooz 0]

just my theory.............little boys played team sport/games. girls played with dolls, typically by themselves, hence no competition. with competition comes winning/losing and getting over it. girls are always supposed to be nice and kind and not say a harsh word, while boys can chide each other over who is or isn't a good player and be done with it. as girls we didn't have the "team experience" in playing house or dolls, or dress up. so as girls we were not exposed to the team effort that boys were and don't have the competition ingrained. so we are or can be the sensitive ones. what they did said more about them than it did you. but that is just my theory..........g2s

[pennyt 14]

At least you don't have a jerk for a husband/boyfriend like I do. I didn't tell my boyfriend I got banded (we have a long distance relationship). I have told him I lost 27 pounds since Feb. His response? "How much more do you have to lose? 400?" and then he laughs. I've lost a lot of respect for him....and he's lost me. Can't wait to show him the new me in 6 months!

I think I would have told him that I was about to lose 250 pounds of pure excess weight, and then I would have said, "Wanna see how fast I can do it?" Then I'd just hang up on him. He was abusive, and you don't deserve that.

Find a man who appreciates you, and who won't belittle and hurt you for his own jollies.

[PhotoEgor 0]

Next time you have sex, call up your girlfriend and say "You owe me $10", then don't tell him what you had bet on.

yeah, what she said!

Further, ask him if he's jealous because he hasn't lost weight.

We guys really do pay attention to your ladies. Usually closer than you think. At large, we just don't know how to express it in a complimentary manner instead of an insulting manner. Just remember we're only guys.

gk

[Bunkey1965 2]

I forgot to tell you all. I was able to get one good dig in. After the betting ,later a couple of them and my husband were also suggesting I get new titties to "improve" myself. My husband was going along with it saying "I could live with that". I quickly said "Right after we get your PENAL implant, right?" That shut him up quick.:rolleyes2:

[Apples2 19]

Like said above, try to let it roll off of you. Rudeness is can be found in both sexes. I am on my 6 mo. pre-op diet. Had not seen my "best" friend since I started this process in Nov. I am down close to 50lbs and saw her a few weeks ago. Actually, spent 6 hours with her and not once did she mention my weight loss. She also has a weight problem and weighs about the same as when I started losing. I waited a few days and then emailed her. I asked her if she noticed at all that I had lost weight. Her response: "I would have said something about it but then I would have also had to tell you that your belly is still big". There is not a word I could say. She didn't deserve a reply to such a rude comment. I am now reconsidering the meaning of what a "best" friend is.

It was said and I let it roll off of me. The only thing I have is sympathy for her and the fact that she cannot be happy for the steps I have taken.

[Kat817 19]

Apples, I get the belly comment from my in laws all the time!! My SIL and I were banded together, and she carried her weight in her hips and thighs, me in my belly. Well as she lost, she shrunk down, and when she has on clothes she looks great!!!!! Unfortunately she is 60 and dressing as though she is 20----and shows lots of wrinkled skin. But ALWAYS has a comment about how carrying that belly looks so uncomfortable---and how it cannot be normal....yadda, yadda, yadda. Well I have my TT ready to be scheduled----wonder what the catty bunch will find to nag me about now???!!!!

Even though every last one of that family is overweight--------my weight was always fodder for their conversations. I have just made the choice to distance myself from them.

My FIL did it to me again just the other day at lunch, he ask me how I was---when I said I was good, he told me (point blank) I did not look good, didn't look like I felt very good. Hmmmmm let it bother me, but tried not to-----sometimes he is a rude old goat!!!

Kat

[Apples2 19]

Well, the way I have it figured, Kat. Humans all have the ability to think b/4 speaking. I figure most cutting comments are on purpose. Not just a slip of the tongue. I can forgive once. The second time around, I purposely ignore.

[Kat817 19]

My FIL is well past 80----and people tend to write off his comments due to that. I do my best to ignore him, when his barbs come my way. My MIL used to be the sweetest woman--she was kind, and gave everyone the benefit of the doubt about everything---not so anymore---I think he rubbed off!!! I know he did on one of his kids anyway---glad it wasn't my DH!!!!

Kat