Want Procedure...No Support

[Mommie_of_4 0]

Well I'm new to thisi site. I'm interested in getting the lapband done, but wondering if anyone in TEXAS has had the procedure done and Tricare insurance paid for it. I was looking at the True Results website and they say they don't take tricare. So what doctors would I be referred to? I'm 5'5 at 218 so not sure what tricare even requires for you to have the procedure.

Also, I want this procedure, but my husband would be 100% against it. He is a marine/navy man who is in GREAT shape. He believes that all can be done with working out and nothing else. Well I've tried working out and nothing really happens. I lose then gain more. I have 4 beautiful children and have been pregnant for half of our marriage. But weight has really been an issue for our marriage. I want to do this because all of my kids are under 6 (5, 3, 16 months, 14 weeks). I would pretty much have to do this whole process alone and without my husbands support. So my last question would be to see if anyone has done the process alone and what do you think?

[SweetBunie 1]

I wanted to tell you that first of all here in this site there are pleanty of people here to support you as you make your decisions on how you want to proceed. So many here to encourage you as you seek out what you want to know.

I am very blessed to have a nice circle of friends that are supportive of me and my decison to be banded. As I do not have any family here to help me, I have been blessed to have my friends.

I live in Texas however, I do not have your insurance provider.

I wish you the best in your search for all the information you need to help you do what you want to do with your life.

Nancy :huh2:

[Shamrockgirl60 1]

Gee that is so sad that you don't have your husbands support. Do they have any counseling at the marine base you can go to for support. Any womens groups that you can join. Most hospitals have support groups that meet once a month so that people who have been banded can get together and talk about the whole thing. I went to one as part of my pre testing appointment and it answered a lot of questions. I wish you so much luck in doing this and you won't be alone this is a great place to "talk" about what you want to talk about. Take care. Hope you go thorugh with it. God Bless

[plain 12]

Mommie, I don't know if this will help or not, but I'm in Texarkana, Tx and my pts (I work in a sleep lab in a bariatric center of excellence hospital) that have tricare (tricare south region, to be specific) usually get covered pretty easily. They need one (1) co-morbidity with a certain BMI, along with the other stuff (sleep study, psyche eval, dietician, etc.)

Was all that clear as mud? Bottom line, tricare south region covers in Texarkana.

[JustinsMama 1]

My husband used to be in the marine corp. and my weight was never a sore spot and he was in great shape. I think it is more your husband's personality then being a marine/navy guy.

I would let him know how much you sacrificed your body to give him four beautiful children and it's just not that easy to always workout and lose weight, otherwise, the whole world would be thin.

I'm sorry he is so unsupportive, maybe if you let him know you would be watching what you ate and working out but the band is a tool that would help you actually lose more and keep it off this time.

Good luck, I hope he comes around, if not you still need to do what's best for you!

[Redd 4]

Hi Mommie,

Boy do I feel your pain. I too am a mother of 4 and have absolutly no support at home. My husband does not see my weight as a problem and has decided to ignore my desire for the band in hopes that it will just go away. I am 5'10 and 304 lbs. I have started my 6 month pre-diet requirement and have actually gained weight. However, I want this so bad...not only for the health reasons, but to be able to enjoy life with my children. No matter what I have said to him, it doesn't seem to matter. So I have decided that I am going to do this for me and not let him bring me down. This site is AMAZING and will offer a ton of support. But the most important thing to remember is that you have to do what is best for you! Sorry I don't know anything about your insurance. Have you called them yet? Try that first and foremost and then go from there. I wish you all the luck in the world in proceeding with what you want.

[Onnie67 0]

Well I'm new to thisi site. I'm interested in getting the lapband done, but wondering if anyone in TEXAS has had the procedure done and Tricare insurance paid for it. I was looking at the True Results website and they say they don't take tricare. So what doctors would I be referred to? I'm 5'5 at 218 so not sure what tricare even requires for you to have the procedure.

Also, I want this procedure, but my husband would be 100% against it. He is a marine/navy man who is in GREAT shape. He believes that all can be done with working out and nothing else. Well I've tried working out and nothing really happens. I lose then gain more. I have 4 beautiful children and have been pregnant for half of our marriage. But weight has really been an issue for our marriage. I want to do this because all of my kids are under 6 (5, 3, 16 months, 14 weeks). I would pretty much have to do this whole process alone and without my husbands support. So my last question would be to see if anyone has done the process alone and what do you think?

is it maybe that your husband does not know or understand the lap band system? I have had friends who were negative until i explained to them in more detail how it works and more importantly WHY i wanted it...not because I believe it is a cure all, or that this will fix my issues, but rather it is a tool that will help me to become a more healthly person. i am not looking for a certain number or size, but rather a "feeling" a feeling of feeling GOOD...not having pain, being able to walk away from food and feel ok about it...not worrying about the future...maybe if you can express why you want the surgery with your hubby you can have a conversation and get the ball moving!!

Good Luck!!!

[4evrwild 0]

Have you actually sat your husband down and explained to him how very much you want to better your life and that of your families for now and the future? Perhaps he should go to one of the seminars with you so he can learn about this as well? I know how some people just can't seem to understand what we go thru cuz they've never been there and it seems like a drastic measure. It's not that drastic really(after all, it isn't brain surgery and it's a 3 compared to RNY which is likely a 10 on a scale of 1 to 10, says my surgeon); I spent most of my life being fit and trim and here I am 100lbs overweight!! What? The fact is those of us who really want to better our lives are already half way to doing so, just in knowing it isn't healthy to be so overweight. I've lost weight in the past and gained it back and then some, and then some more, lol. Not really funny but you know how I feel. Sh**t happens.............; sometimes we just need something a lil extra to get there, a great tool like the lapband. We have to feel good about ourselves so others can too, that's what I say

You will definately find support here I think. I'm newly banded and just found this site and so glad I did!! I just went to a support group meeting the other day and I'm glad I did that too! I feel so much better already cuz I'm on my way to a healthier and happier me. Send your hubby to this site! Good luck to you and your family!!

[myturn0421 0]

First off, there is nothing more important than close support. As much as it would be nice for that to come from you husband, not everyone is so fortunate. I am so sorry - my guess, he doesn't completely understand it. I would reach out to a support group. Most places that do the surgery, have a support group close by. Also, see if he'll go to a seminar with you. Either way, this site is awesome. I haven't been banded yet; I have my fingers crossed to set a date within the next few weeks. Any question, thought, doubt, or victory is found on this site. There is ALWAYS someone here that can relate or just be here to listen.

I wish you the best of luck in your journey.

Stephanie (East Texas)

[Wheetsin 714]

Going to move this to the TX board since you're specifically looking for people from there. You might get more attention to your thread that way.

[egnebs 0]

I think TriCare probably covers it as they want you to be healthy and not have so many medical problems down the road. It will help your health and help you to stay around and be healthy for the children growing up.

Maybe your husband is worried about you getting thinner and others looking your way...who knows. But in the long run, you need to do what is best for you and those little ones and your husband will probably come around....especially when he sees how good you are looking and you are with HIM. The procedure is not that bad....a few sore muscles and a couple small scars and you are on your way! Learning a different way of eating so the band can help you is not bad either. You just have to start thinking positive and not think about food. A couple of times of not chewing something enough will cure you of a lot of cravings. The first couple weeks are the worst for most because of being sore or on a liquid diet...but thats not that bad. And when you sit down and eat at home or out afterwards...eating smaller portions isnt bad when others are stuffing their face, because all you have to do is satisfy your little bitty pouch and watch everyone around you getting bigger and you are getting smaller!! Its great for the self esteem and you have a world of support in this website!!:redface:

[Mommie_of_4 0]

My husband is a true believer of you can work it off. No surgery is needed and you can do it on your own. If I had the surgery I would opt not to even tell him.

I want a healthy life with my kids and want to run/play with them without being winded. Or for them to think that mommy can't play with us because she is big. I'm going to go to the seminar and see what it's all about. I need to talk with my primary and get his backing too!

thanks so much!

[JustinsMama 1]

I think it would be a hard thing to hide from him once you are at your right restriction if you went through with it or had any problems like stuck episodes, etc., unless he will be overseas, etc.

I'm sorry but your marriage sounds pretty one sided, does he make all the decisions?

[Sugarbear 2]

First check your insurance policy for how bariatric surgery is covered. Mine was listed in my benefits book. Or just call and ask about bariatric surgery coverage. Do you have any friends or family that is close that would help you with the children when you have the procedure? pushing, pulling, or lifting, is not recomended as you would not want to upset your port site while it is scarring or seating in place. With four young children you would definitely need help. Everyone is right about support from this site. We have all been there...done that...and we fully understand. Many people have the will power to just "do it" on their own. MANY do not. Some of us need some help. Such as the lapband. It is only a tool to help you along. There will always be people that don't understand that. We do. Sometimes you just have to take control and help yourself. Trust me, YOU ARE WORTH IT!! Good luck with your decision.

[Roustabout 0]

I'm a retired Army helicopter pilot, Ranger, Infantry grunt , holed up in Cleveland, TX, the fartherest north my wife has ever lived. I finally lost the fight with the weight demons last year. I have tricare standard. I'm waiting daily for scheduling for the surgery...Waiting for the tricare letter.

Most of the news from Tricare is good. There are a lot of people on this forum who had lap band with tricare. Their stated requirements are: 100 pounds overweight off the insurance charts plus one morbidality like High blood pressure, sleep apnea or such. They don't care what your BMI rating is. Some have gotten approval in as little as ten days. I've never been that lucky, but the Tricare office keeps telling the surgeons office it'll be any day.

I've tried so many things for weight loss through the years, including a years of physical work outs, hypnosis, and every diet know to man, that my wife doesn't believe this will work either. Therefore she's taken a standoffish mode. Meanwhile the pies, and cakes, and huge meals keep happening while I'm hanging on to the pre-op diet of Protein drinks. Lady, this has to work. I'm a walking powder keg looking for a stroke or a jump into diebetes. My wife is approching the same keg, but she's never dieted in her life. If I can but lose the weight and get into condition with the band, maybe she will follow. Every morning I check and see if she's breathing. She's as hard headed as your husband. It runs directly in her family.

Good luck and check here for support.:smile2:

David