I'm so tired of the question "Can you eat this?"

[coolcrystal 1]

I'm also sick of hearing from a morbidly obese friend who can't afford the surgery and would have to be self pay that she couldn't handle having all the problems I have.

What problems??? Some days I'm tight, so I eat mushies. SO WHAT? That's not what I consider to be a problem. Hell, I LOVE eating refried Beans for supper, it means I don't have to cook! DH makes burritos out of what I have left...

One time I was really bruised after a fill, and I accidentally bumped it with my purse, and she made another comment like that about it. Which really kills me because I think if her insurance would pay for it, she'd be all over it. She is just trying to convince herself that she doesn't want or need the surgery, and I get that. What I don't get is why she has to say that stuff TO ME. I have had relatively few problems, and she's constantly acting like I'm always having issues.

Yeah, she's totally trying to make it seem in her head that you are having all these problems because she wants to feel better about not being able to get it... A lady at my work was doing the same thing before I got banded... begging me not to, that I was going to have issues and throw up all the time... Every week she asks me if I'm alright and I say "yeah, I'm doing great" and she just didn't believe it, so we went to a chinese buffet for lunch one day. I had a tiny scoop of tuna, salmon, mixxed veggies and salad and I had a little of each and was done. She couldn't believe I wasn't throwing up or nauseous. After we left, she asked me again in the car "are you still feeling okay?" "YES!!" It was like she wanted something to be wrong. Since then she hasn't bothered me about it and I hope it stays that way. lol.

[Kat817 19]

The longer I maintain my loss, the less people ask about it--or seem to concern themselves with it. I also noticed when I began weighing less than some of them, they quit asking how much I had lost.

Now I get more of the "You're done losing weight aren't you?" or just telling me not to lose anymore or I will be too skinny....yeah right, not for awhile I won't!!!!

I have a friend who was actually banded before me, and she has not been successful with her band, she has not had regular fills etc. She is actually the worst of them all. Her DH was banded at the same time, he dropped 130 pounds and has kept it off. She took another friend and she too was banded--and lost about 30 pounds and the band quit working she says. But I see her at Breakfast and she is eating biscuits and gravy and hashbrowns!

Those are some examples of why others think the band will never work......it takes you working with it!

The biggest misunderstanding I have come across in people is them thinking it must be removed when I am finished losing weight!

Kat

[Skinny_Jill 36]

I'm also sick of hearing from a morbidly obese friend who can't afford the surgery and would have to be self pay that she couldn't handle having all the problems I have.

What problems??? Some days I'm tight, so I eat mushies. SO WHAT? That's not what I consider to be a problem. Hell, I LOVE eating refried Beans for supper, it means I don't have to cook! DH makes burritos out of what I have left...

One time I was really bruised after a fill, and I accidentally bumped it with my purse, and she made another comment like that about it. Which really kills me because I think if her insurance would pay for it, she'd be all over it. She is just trying to convince herself that she doesn't want or need the surgery, and I get that. What I don't get is why she has to say that stuff TO ME. I have had relatively few problems, and she's constantly acting like I'm always having issues.

She is trying to find reasons to make her feel better about not being able to get it. I did the same thing after fighting with insurance for a year. I told myself and my family that the band would be difficult anyway so I would just do it without it and it would be better. HA I soon realized that I was full of it and fought with insurance for another year before I bit the bullet and got a loan. It is the best money I've ever spent.

I work with someone that is having the same problems with Aetna that I did and insurance won't cover it and she can't afford the loan. I feel bad for her and I hope she won't start knocking the band now. I don't think she will because I am her boss. :biggrin2:

[travelgirl 3]

Just try not to fire her if she does! EEK!!!

[Kelgirl68 0]

I don't get to much of the "can you eat that" question but I do get compared quite often to two women that I work with that got bypasses. I didn't get a 'good' fill until 1Oct07, one that did the trick, so I have been losing very slow. I have lost more weight in the past 6mo than I have since I was banded due to my last fill. I'm hoping to be in "Onederland" by July!!!

Edited April 1, 2008 by Kelgirl68

[mendypoo 0]

After a couple of bites my husband always asks "Are you full yet?"

[coolcrystal 1]

After a couple of bites my husband always asks "Are you full yet?"

OMG, that's so funny!!!!!!!!!!

[Angelica 1]

My best guy friend! We went for wings yesterday and he kept trying to convince me to eat the carrot sticks first because he wanted me to get full so that I wouldnt eat the wings.

He gives me the same answer everytime, I'm just looking out for YOUR band dude.

hes hilarious

[Daisalana 33]

Wings have protein!

When I go to dinner with my mom, I do 'stop suddenly', it always hits me when I'm not paying attention..and we gab all throughout eating.

She always asks "Are you going to puke? Please don't puke". She gags at the very thought of someone else puking. I've never puked or PB'd in front of her, but she is very nervous when I stop suddenly and just have to sit very still.

[travelgirl 3]

Wings have protein!

When I go to dinner with my mom, I do 'stop suddenly', it always hits me when I'm not paying attention..and we gab all throughout eating.

She always asks "Are you going to puke? Please don't puke". She gags at the very thought of someone else puking. I've never puked or PB'd in front of her, but she is very nervous when I stop suddenly and just have to sit very still.

LMAO! I stop suddenly, too. And I must get a certain look on my face, 'cause dh knows EVERY time what's happening, just by looking. And he can usually tell better than I can just by the look on my face whether I'm going to have to make a mad dash for the bathroom, or find an empty cup or other receptacle... HA! I must say that I *usually* stop in time, though, and I can just sit quietly and it will pass.

[Skinny_Jill 36]

I see my mother and sister every weekend and while we are eating I usually have 1 moment where I've taken to big of a bite or something and get that little warning signal so I stop eating for a few minutes and they always stare at me and finally ask "Does it hurt?" or "It's not going down very well, is it?"

[Chrisann 0]

I spent time with my parents last month while on vacation, they hadn't seen me since the surgery and two weeks after.

I had been on solids for over a month when I went with 2 fills under my belt.

All I kept getting asked was how come you are eating that? Can you eat that much?

The story then made the rounds to all my brothers and sisters. Know what I had that WHOLE day? 1 egg over easy, 1/2 cup cottage cheese, 3 wedges cheddar cheese, 5oz piece of grilled tilapia, and 4 oz sirloin steak. No veggies, no carbs, no juice, no soda, no Snacks, no dessert. I walked 5 miles that morning and drank close to a gallon of Water.

Next day, wasn't feeling hungry at all, did a 3 mile walk. Ate 1 cup of cottage cheese, with Strawberries, and 3 wedges of cheddar. dinner was turkey breast, mashed potatoes, broccoli, stuffed mushrooms. My sister was over for dinner.

This was her: you have a lot of turkey on your dish, you aren't going to lose weight. The only two things on my plate were turkey and broccoli. I got up, put the turkey on the weight watchers scale and it weighed 5oz. That shut her up. But that story made its way around the family, except the fact I weighed the meat in front of everyone.

[travelgirl 3]

I spent time with my parents last month while on vacation, they hadn't seen me since the surgery and two weeks after.

I had been on solids for over a month when I went with 2 fills under my belt.

All I kept getting asked was how come you are eating that? Can you eat that much?

The story then made the rounds to all my brothers and sisters. Know what I had that WHOLE day? 1 egg over easy, 1/2 cup cottage cheese, 3 wedges cheddar cheese, 5oz piece of grilled tilapia, and 4 oz sirloin steak. No veggies, no carbs, no juice, no soda, no Snacks, no dessert. I walked 5 miles that morning and drank close to a gallon of Water.

Next day, wasn't feeling hungry at all, did a 3 mile walk. Ate 1 cup of cottage cheese, with Strawberries, and 3 wedges of cheddar. dinner was turkey breast, mashed potatoes, broccoli, stuffed mushrooms. My sister was over for dinner.

This was her: you have a lot of turkey on your dish, you aren't going to lose weight. The only two things on my plate were turkey and broccoli. I got up, put the turkey on the weight watchers scale and it weighed 5oz. That shut her up. But that story made its way around the family, except the fact I weighed the meat in front of everyone.

Oh, now that just trips my trigger. Next time kindly and gently remind them that you are well educated on your band rules, and really can do without the food police. If you need their help or suggestions, you're a big girl (no pun intended) and will ask for it. Otherwise, S.T.E.P. O.F.F.!!!

Also, they'd probably mess their pants if they saw how much I could eat before I got good restriction. For crying out loud.

Edited April 1, 2008 by travelgirl
One more thought...

[heartfire 4]

ALL of these stories and my own experience of being on WW and EVERYONE knowing about it are exactly why I have only told 3 people (DH, mom and a friend) and don't plan on telling anyone else. At least for awhile.

Unfortunately for me there are 2 women from church who have the same insurance as I do and are going through the same process at the same time (seminar and 20 session nutrition class) and are big-mouths (they're best friends and VERY obnoxious!). I'm hoping they keep their traps shut but if anyone asks, I'm going through the process and will make a decision later. I think they are focusing on bypass though, so that should help. Meaning we all have to go through the bypass process even if we want banding and they'll be losing weight faster so they may just "assume" that I changed my mind about surgery. I'm hoping anyway.

[Chrisann 0]

You know whats funny? Its not my friends or coworkers making comments, they have been unbelievably supportive. Its my FAMILY. I know they mean well even though they are being snarky.