Totally Blind, Considering Lap Band

[serenity55 15]

Hello:

My name is Debbie. I have been lurking for a few weeks, and I love everything I've read.

I like to say that I'm blind, not to elicit sympathy, but I've found it's best for me to be open about that from the start.

I have been overweight for most of my adult life, and at times, pretty depressed about it, not to mention how I think others see me.

I'm terrified about having surgery; I had major surgery about six years ago, and have a terrible fear of needles. I've been known to walk out of labs because I couldn't stand the thought of the sting, which is more than that to me.

I've known people who have had stomach stapling, I think, and they've gained the weight and then some. This was, in fairness, many years ago. A friend of mine is taking seminars now--she's having the ru-NY--is that right? Anyway, she's the only person, so far, who is supportive of my even considering the lab band. It's interesting that the people who tell me I don't need it, are, for the most part, thinner than I am. I have a couple of fat friends that say there's no way they'd have any kind of weight loss surgery. But I have high blood pressure, sleep apnea, my knees hurt when I go up or down stairs--and I live in a town house. I'm sure you all know the story.

Sorry I've gone on so long. I haven't said any of the things I wanted to. I really love this site, and am looking forward to getting to know you all, and the other way around as well.

Debbie .

[Wheetsin 714]

I used to be a fat friend who said I'd never have any kind of weightloss surgery. Part of that was jealousy that someone else actually had the cajones to get it done, and part of it was being uneducated about the different options and what they entail.

There were lots of things overall, but two superficially physical things that postponed my decision for way too long: 1) fear of needles, specifically an IV which I'd never had at the time of my band surgery and 2) detest vomitting.

It didn't take much more than the initial lab work with my physical to get acclimated to the needle idea. I was extremely nervous about the IVs but the hospital I was at gives a tiny bit of lidocaine prior to the IV. Woo hoo! Needles are used for the fills, but I'd estimate that 90% of the people I've spoken with, who don't use lidocaine for fills, feel virtually nothing.

Roux-en-Y (aka RNY or gastric bypass) is a common procedure. I know several people who have had it, and every single one of them has put weight back on. Then again, I know a lot of bandsters who have also put back on weight. The nice thing in our case is that we can go get a fill, instead of being "on our own."

Welcome and hope you're able to find all the answers you're looking for. :sneaky:

[serenity55 15]

Wheetsin, thank you for such a quick response. It's comforting to know that I'm not the only one who is terrified of needles. How did you do with the fills?

I've been jealous of people I thought were on the road to weight loss, so that makes perfect sense to me that others should feel the same.

I know I have to get to the place where, as car50 told me (thank you very much) I have to just do it, because the fear will never go away, and it feels good knowing I've got a place to come to for support.

Again, thank you very much.

Debbie

[Kalipso2 25]

i'm not afraid of needles but i AM afraid of the tube down the throat during surgery... i'm almost scared enough that i had almost talked myself out of the surgery. i haven't set a date yet but i'm trying to look past the surgery... at not dwell so much on how i'm going to get there!

[Hess 1]

Kalipso2 My doc did the tube after they put me out. that and the cath. never knew I had them, till I had to drink and pee. lol

Hess

[serenity55 15]

Yes, that's true. When I had surgery they put in the breathing tube and catheter after I was out, and I never knew, but I was scared of those, too.

Debbie

[VegasGrace 1]

Hey. And welcome! You would be a perfect candidate as your motives are not 'what you see in the mirror'.

You want health, to feel better...to sleep well.

Good luck on your journey and keep us posted.

[sfeiner 2]

I'll tell you what scares me. Getting so big that I can't take care of myself. Being in a nursing home unable to wash my self, caregivers hating me because I'm killing their backs (I've been one of those care givers) Being unable to wipe my own butt, having little kids point at me, having teenagers giggle about me, having adults ignore me, needing 10 EMTs to get me in the ambulance (I've been one of those EMTs) and needing 10 strong pall bearers to carry my casket.

If you get diabetes you will need needles and finger pricks several times a day. The pain and agony you can end up going through from all the co-morbiditys of obesity versus a couple little needle picks is like comparing a grain of sand to a gravel pit!

[serenity55 15]

Yes, don't I know it! And I've lived through needles before, so I know I can do it again. While it's true that all the things you mentioned could happen--thank goodness I'm not diabetic--the fear is just as real.

So I'm taking it one day at a time, as I did before Thank you..

Grace, thank you for the welcome.

[Wheetsin 714]

You know, I was nervous about the tube too. And just the idea of having zero control over what was going to happen to me once I was out. Even the actual act of going under was causing some anxiety. What made the tube idea worse for me was that my admitting nurse told me, "Sometimes we leave it in and make the patient pull it out themselves. That's how we know they can breathe on their own." That didn't make a lot of sense to me, but as a surgery virgin it was enough to make my skin crawl.

Well - I was out when it went in, and it was out when I woke up. In fact, sheepishly putting my hand up to my mouth to feel if it was still there was one of my first conscious acts in recovery.

As for how I deal with the needles - I was really nervous for my first fill. The fact that I couldn't see jack (due to laying on my back and being pretty much limited to the ceiling) helped. And actually having the first fillr eally helped, because I knew what to expect.

My advice for fills - if you're given the option for lidocaine, go without. Trust me on this.

[GreenChrysalis 1]

Welcome, Debbie. It sounds like you are educating yourself very well about your options and that's definitely the best first step. I hope that you find what you're looking for here. I've found that most people here are generally very supportive. Sometimes it's "tough love," but sometimes that's what we need. Good luck and I hope you keep us updated no matter what you decide to do.

[bigbaby 4]

Serenity...

I just have to ask...and expose my ignorance....are u actually blind---visually impaired? if so what technology r u using to navigate/type on computer?

[GreenChrysalis 1]

Bigbaby, I have a friend who is blind and uses his computer to work from home. He has screen reader and voice recognition software -- so text is read to him and he surfs the Internet and types using voice commands. There's a lot of different types of hardware and software out there these days; technology is pretty amazing. I'm guessing Serenity uses something like that as well.

[Angelyco 0]

A friend of mine in college used to be as big as me, and lately on Facebook I saw her new pictures, she's lost a ton of weight just by diet and exercise. After seeing that, I felt guilty for going the Lap-Band route instead of hard work. I also know that it will be harder for her to keep it off, whereas I will have the help of the band. It was hard for me, but I told her my intentions to get the Lap-Band since she was one of my few overweight friends, and thankfully, she told me that she supported me as long as I promised to take it out if anything goes wrong! She admitted that it's hard to lose weight and commended me that I'm trying anything at all.

[shortgal 5]

Hello Debbie, Welcome to the forum. We all have fears about something. I tend to build up the fear much larger in my mind than the actual event turns out to be. I used to faint, yes, pass out, when they drew blood! Then I realized it was because I just didn't understand the whole process and it really didn't hurt as much as my brain told me it would.

I am so much better now and my fills do pinch, I can't lie, but not as much as pinching my hand in something or a bad fingernail break or getting cut on glass or a sliver. So I try to use those comparisons to ease my mind.

If I'm nervous at those times, I find I talk to the person incessantly, to distract myself. Then I realized, maybe distracting them with my talking, while they were coming at me with a needle might not be too smart. Ha Ha!

Just educate yourself as much as you can about lap banding, as information is powerful. You'll make the right decision for you.